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[stepintime]

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CSO4, thanks, I have a buddy now, on exactly same day as me! xx

[CS04]

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Step, I think it helps to have the same days as someone! I don't want to get too caught up in counting and analyzing, though. Feel free to PM me anytime. It's closer to bedtime for you, I imagine, but I still have all of Saturday night ahead of me. ;-}

[Mia67]

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Hey Muppett... I can relate to the 17 standard drinks and the 8 standard drinks, and I can relate to the "why not drink, everything's ok" mentality. I think that's how I've been justifying my drinking for so many years. I hold down a good job, my children are happy and adjusted, I appear to be ok, well presentable etc., have good friends..... have come a cropper with terrible decisions made when drunk though, some to do with deciding to drive when I knew I shouldn't and then other decisions that put me into real unsafe situations with men (and unsafe S*X). Those last two reasons are reasons enough to stop drinking because of my lack of control. But without those reasons I would think "why should I stop drinking?". I think that for me, this is going to be a wait and see what life has in store for me once I'm not drinking. I am only 12 hours AF at the moment but if I could look into a crystal ball to see where I'll be a month from now, two months from now, a year from now, without alcohol in my life, this is what I'm expecting to find: my children are much happier because I'll have the energy to do anything with them, my job will be even better because I won't get lapses in concentration or feel a bit tired or lethargic in the mornings, my skin will look better from good health not from that rosy alcohol glow, my sleep will be better, my days will run smoother. Do you see what I'm saying? To me, everything seems largely ok while I'm a drinker - but to have the life I really want and deserve? Well, that's why I need to stop drinking and give that life the opportunity to present itself. I think I owe it to me. Who knows when my number will be up? I want to make the rest of my life count and enjoy each moment of every day. Kia kaha e hoa, hang in there !!!

[Aussie Chick]

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Hi Muppet, I guess if you didn't feel out of control with your drinking you wouldn't have found this site in the first place, it's just that when you want a drink or have had a few drinks then your head wants to justify why it is actually OK to have 10+ standard drinks a night, last night who was talking you or the booze monster?

I've just wanted to get back to how it is when you a kiddie or before you started even drinking, booze is just not an issue, every day you wake up fresh, you live life, nothing dictates/rules what you do, keeps you in at night so you can drink whatever you want without worrying about how to get home or anyone seeing you.

It took most of us ages to actually decide to do something about it, lots of drinking, lots of hangovers, lots of guilt and remorse, lots of decisions to quit, cracking later in the day when you feel better etc etc etc....maybe you are still working up to it, but you are coming in the right direction just by even being here.

Good luck.
AC x x

[Monica]

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I have to agree with the others - the mere fact that you are reading and posting here signals your awareness that you have a problem. It's not unusal for people to hold down good jobs, maintain relationships and enjoy excellent health, despite heavy drinking But in order to change, you have to accept that on some level you are using alcohol to avoid facing up to stuff.

I've been 2 wks AF now and although nothing showed on the outside, from my habitual 1-2 bottles of wine a night for years, the guilt and shame of a secret problem wracked my mind.

What have you got to gain? Well, I am feeling proud of myself for the first time in years. I'm feeling strong and positive.

The facial bloating is disappearing. I'm starting to recognise my face again, in the mirror that recently made me shudder, every morning - the black circles under my eyes, the capillary flush effect in my booze-bloated face.

I'm feeling strong and positive. I'm eating the healthiest food in ages and exercising like a bastard, so the excess fat is melting off and I'm sleeping like a baby.

Good luck - it's honestly worth it.

[Monica]

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I have to agree with the others - the mere fact that you are reading and posting here signals your awareness that you have a problem. It's not unusal for people to hold down good jobs, maintain relationships and enjoy excellent health, despite heavy drinking But in order to change, you have to accept that on some level you are using alcohol to avoid facing up to stuff.

I've been 2 wks AF now and although nothing showed on the outside, from my habitual 1-2 bottles of wine a night for years, the guilt and shame of a secret problem wracked my mind.

What have you got to gain? Well, I am feeling proud of myself for the first time in years. I'm feeling strong and positive.

The facial bloating is disappearing. I'm starting to recognise my face again, in the mirror that recently made me shudder, every morning - the black circles under my eyes, the capillary flush effect in my booze-bloated face.

I'm feeling strong and positive. I'm eating the healthiest food in ages and exercising like a bastard, so the excess fat is melting off and I'm sleeping like a baby.

Good luck - it's honestly worth it.

[Monica]

Standard Drinks

I have to agree with the others - the mere fact that you are reading and posting here signals your awareness that you have a problem. It's not unusual for people to hold down good jobs, maintain relationships and enjoy excellent health, despite heavy drinking. But in order to change, you have to accept that on some level you are using alcohol to avoid facing up to stuff.

I've been 2 wks AF now and although nothing showed on the outside, from my habitual 1-2 bottles of wine a night for years, the guilt and shame of a secret problem wracked my mind.

What have you got to gain? Well, I am feeling proud of myself for the first time in years. I'm feeling strong and positive.

The facial bloating is disappearing. I'm starting to recognise my face again, in the mirror that recently made me shudder, every morning - the black circles under my eyes, the capillary flush effect in my booze-bloated face.

I'm eating the healthiest food in ages and exercising like a bastard, so the excess fat is melting off and I'm sleeping like a baby.

Good luck - it's honestly worth it.

[irish eyes]

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Muppett;515661 wrote: Hello,
I am sooooo scared about reducing my drinking. Don't know how to live my nights sober? What will I do if I'm not drinking? How will I sleep?
Last night I had 17 standard drinks. Tonight 8 (so far).
I think I might just be a "wreck of a woman".

Hi Muppett
You have just said it yourself that you think you might be a 'wreck of a woman' There is a better way to live. You do have a choice, it is scary but just that, you can do it. Load of support here if you choose the sober route - over to you.

[ezzmae]

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To be honest I didn't intend to gripe anyone off. I had already answered the question in much the same manner as most people have. It was late at night in Australia, Muppett in her own admission had been drinking for a while. I don't think anything I wrote here would have been what she wanted to hear. That is why I logged off and went to bed.

[irish eyes]

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Ezzmae
U dident gripe me off you said what you had to say which was constructive, Muppet may not have liked it but hey perhaps she is not ready to seriously look at her drinking pattern just yet. Afterall she has had quite alot to drink so of course she is defensive and l alcoholism is a disease of denial.

[upnorthgirl]

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no problem, Ezz

Some people--like me sometimes--don't want to hear the answers to the questions because we know the other person is right (and I HATE being wrong, you know?).

Most times I need compassion, understanding and a hug. Other times, when I am being a beligerrant, whining ass, :bum: I need someone to get in my face. (tough love??). Sometimes you need to just say, "Shit or get off the pot."

Anyway, hugs all around to all. :groupluv: Everyone is only trying to help everyone else.

[irish eyes]

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upnorth
I second that

[Monica]

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Apologies for submitting my post THREE times. Hope you didn't think I was nagging - lol. I saw a typo and tried to fix it, then next thing, it all jammed up on me, so I hit Submit again ... and again.

Good luck everyone.

[Muppett]

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Thanks

Hi Guys........All good responses.
Am going to try AF just for tomorrow night..............that'll be pretty to watch.
Does anyone drink anything else on those nights? Any recommendations.
Ezzmae.....you seemed a bit harsh but I can understand how you might be feeling. Some grizzly shiela wanting to do anything rather than acknowledge her problem.
Mia67 has gone 12 hours AF. What a hero and I really admire that. You go girl.
Aussie Chick, thank you.
You are all wonderful.
Anyone else going AF on Monday?

[Aussie Chick]

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Hi Muppett, good to have you back - wondered how you were after yesterday. Good luck with your first AF night, it may not be that bad, could surprise you. Bloomin powerful feeling when you do achieve it.

I'm drinking slimline tonic and lime juice by the bucket load or soda a lemon. Did buy some alcohol free wines from Coles/Woolworths, they are OK - don't really taste like wine but look OK in a wine glass. I may treat myself to one of those later tonight....lucky me!!!

All I know is that if you do manage to get 1 Day AF you'll feel wonderful for achieving it and you never know you may do another one after that, then another, then another.

Good luck to you anyway. I'm nearing the end of Day 5 - this is my hardest time the evenings when I used to sit infront of the TV relaxing and drinking.

Take care
AC x x