Newbies Nest

[Herbie]

Newbies Nest

PF

i relate to that fear, have been there... right sizing is what they use to call it...it is agony... just waiting to hear..I admire you so much for staying out of the bottle.. my thoughts and prayers are with you and your team...

[lilla]

Newbies Nest

slinking back in here sheepishly after the weekend meltdown. But it was two glasses, not two bottles like before so got to see the positive changes I have made, even amongst the disappointment and embarrassment. Everyone has been so supportive of those of us who slipped. Day 3 today for me (second time around) and I hope everyone feels as strong as I do right now thanks to the advice and caring here.

[Prairie Fairy]

Newbies Nest

Herbie and Nollie - while my MOST unhappy marriage was in it's never-ending death-throes - wine was a fabulous duller. I thought of it as my "1-800 Go Suck it" version of Mama's little helper. Interstingly - I am not sure under those circumstances the AL was all bad. After all - the big a$$ hole is still breathing .and I would look terrible in an orange jumpsuit and no makeup! LOL!!!! Orange is not my color.

So - not that anyone is joining me in Ex Husband land - (which BTW - costs a fortune to travel to despite it being an awesome destination- ) but I do understand the desire to numb down a doozy whooper of a fight.

[kpartyof1]

Newbies Nest

OK ok ok....UGGH.. I feel like a complet IDIOT..but, I am having a hard time navigating the forum! I am not sure how to read any replies to my posts...and, I barely found those, lol...So, what the heck am I doing? Or not doing?? Maybe I should not get on at 5:30 a.m. :-)

[mrsg]

Newbies Nest

Hi Everyone,

kpartyof1, I'm not much help to you I'm afraid, I'm pretty useless at navigating this site also! I haven't left a message in a few days but I'm still here, reading and keeping up with everything. The party on Saturday night went really well, I felt strong and confident without AL!! We stayed until 2.30 and then I had a 2 hour drive home, not nice, but at least I got to wake up in my own bed and read the sunday papers and have breakfast. I am on day 30/31, I've sort of lost count, but it is 1 month tomorrow!!!
I'm feeling generally very good, still a little tired for some reason. I am very proud of myself. At the party I accidently took a drink of a glass of beer, I spat it out because ,1) I hate beer and 2) because I didn't want even the tiniest bit of AL in my body. Have a great day nesters and a warm welcome to the newbies. This is a FANTASTIC site, full of inspiring and amazing people. If you want to keep AL out of your life, get comfy here, it really helps xxx

[MinStar]

Newbies Nest

Hey nesters. Excuse the typos. On phone again. Great to see so much inspiration and support. I lve coming on and hearing these words.

Day 8 for me. I am so so tired I can not get up in the morning. Poor baby gets a sleepy mummy feeding her porridge an hour late. She is so good. Just play on the bed next to me whilst I try jardiniere to get. Myself out if bed. Been taking multivits, Dunking tons of water, Eating healthy so I am hoping it is just things getting back to normal and my body finally has space to recuperate without having to deal with AL. Any good waking up tips are appreciated lol

Have a good day nesters x

[patrice]

Newbies Nest

Hiya all

I am back on day 2 and feeling so much stronger from reading posts from all you wonderful and inspiring women!!
PF - I really hope your job is ok but really cool for not stressing about it and hitting the bottle!!! - that really is something to be proud of
Audrey - I have been thinking about you and hope Australia is going well - yes sadly there are some rather nice Sth australian wines... But I guess they are the ones to be savoured and nursed through a good meal and then corked up ( the only 'glasses I had were of the bucket variety!)

Hi Lav, Windy Byrd - rocks as usual

Blonde I love the idea of counting all the AF days this year.. I am going to look back and count mine ( I hope I can get into 2 digits!!)

I'm feeling ok - a bit down because I broke up with my long distance off/on BF - we had been together for over a year ib different countries but I had a Ureka moment at the weekend and realise that we only ever talk on skype or FB when we are both drinking ( he has always had a huge drinking problem, like me) I realised that I have wasted so much time drunk on skype talking crap... then I thought how much worse it would be if I was actually with him... having to deal with both his drinking problem and my own. Strangely I have only seen him sober a few times and wasn't really that impressed... I thought long and hard and realised drunk or sober it was over....my weekends can now be spent away from skype...
I'm dealing with my 6 year old son who seems to be going through a talking back and shouting stage..its doing my head in - I hope it is just a stage?? Easier to deal with sober though despite being so so tired...

Take Care
Patrice

[BlondeAFAmbition]

Newbies Nest

Mornin' everyone!

MinStar...not sure if this will help with you energy levels, but every morning, before I get out of bed I lie there and think about how great my day will be, how everything will go just as it should. I then think of all the reasons in life I have to be grateful...even if they are small things, like the quilt covering my body at the moment. And nowadays, bigger things, like waking up sober. This gets me in a positive frame of mind for the day and gives me more energy. I've been in the habit of getting a pot of coffee ready at night so all I have to do is push the "on" button when I get up, so coffee is ready for me sooner than later. Then I come on here and catch up and post my morning thoughts. Maybe just getting into a really good vibe like this will help out although you seem to be in a cheerful mood this morning anyways! Good luck, you are doing all the right things and well done on Day 8!

PF: I will be thinking of you today with the work situation...that sucks. I have been let go from companies in the past...it is a difficult time, I know. In the late 90's and into 2K, I had a career in technology sales and took my chances working at a few promising start up companies. One did really well and a few other folded. It was the "dot bomb" decade and I felt the shortcomings of that a few times during those years. And on the flip side, I did very well at some of those companies but it never lasted. The rollercoaster was so bad that I decided to get off and start my own business...far from the land of technology, which I wasn't really interested in anyway, but got trapped by the money. Now I work in retail and although the hours are tough and I work weekends, I absolutely love it...love the people, love the products, love my schedule. But going back to your possible lay off this week, I feel for ya and I wish you the best. I had to say a cliche, but things always happen for a reason...

DAY 14 for ME!!!! Ok, 2 weeks done. Now for another 2 weeks. I'll be finishing this year off strong and adding to my total of AF days for the year which is close to 100. Now to add another 100, except this time in a row!!!

Hi to Herbie, Nollie, MSRG, Lav, Lolab, Belle, Willow, Windy, Ronnie, Greg (hope you're doing alright on that water craft!), Brydie and anyone I've missed who is giving it all they got. Great job everyone! This is my "Friday" and I'll have tomorrow and Thurs off...looking forward to a great day at work and then some rest. Take care all!

[BlondeAFAmbition]

Newbies Nest

Hi Patrice! Yes, I think it is a good idea to keep a tally of the total days that you have succeeded in being AF over the course of the year. Afterall, any day without AL is good for us. Not to loose site of getting AL out of my life for good and having all those days together in a row, but just for motivation's sake, it's nice to see your total number over the course of time. For me, it only makes me stronger in my desire to stay sober! Good luck and nice to see you in the nest!

[Prairie Fairy]

Newbies Nest

KPartyof1 - one off the others will have to explain tricks to this thread. If there are any. I've always assumed it's such a giant thread that it's all about reading from where you left off... :-)

MRSRG - Woot woot!!!!!! Congrats on the 30 Days!!!!!! Yay You!!!!

MinStar - keep drinking the water and vitamins - you will come through the fatigue in the next couple of days! You are doing great!!! You can do this - your daughter would be so proud of you if she were older...

Patrice - I mean it. We started within a day or two of each other. I am so glad you are back. It wasn't the same without you. please don't go away - even if you aren't AF for whatever reason - we would rather have you here than have you gone.

[BlondeAFAmbition]

Newbies Nest

Lilla, congrats on Day 3...the best is yet to be! No need to be sheepish about climbing back into the Nest, the important thing is that YOU ARE HERE. Also, you should be proud of your success in not drinking as much as you would have before and it's good to see the positives in that because it is, in fact, great progress! Well done!

Audrey & Irie, hope you are having a great day so far. Stay strong! We have strength in numbers here...like a little army of nestlings. Glad to have you guys here.

PF, I belong to the club of Ahole Ex husbands. Escaped from a 7 year bad marriage the year I turned 30 and haven't looked back. But as of recently, now that years have passed, I have forgiven him and am no longer manifesting the resentment like I did a few years ago. It has been almost 10 years since the divorce and in that time I met my wonderful husband of almost 3 years and am grateful for every day with him. I read Louise Hay's You Can Heal Your Life and one part talked about forgiveness and that's what led me to how I feel about my ex these days. But boy, did we have a time of it back in the day! Was a whole other life. He was a heavy drinker as well, and a very violent one, let me just end it there.

Patrice, it's good to move on if you've gotten into a relationship that has it's roots in AL, believe me. Now that you have decided to make positive changes in your life by giving up AL, it's time to start seeking out friendships and romantic relationships that are more in line with your goals. Although I am happily married, the friendship part (finding new friends who don't drink like fishes!), is where I'm at right now. Just started a study group with a few fabulous women where we meet for COFFEE one morning a week to discuss the book. This just started up and I would have never committed to that if I was still drinking. Anyway, kudos to you for being strong enough to break this off!

See ya later everyone and have a safe, sober day!

[Irie]

Newbies Nest

Good morning everyone! So happy to wake up and have my first thought be... I did it! So on to day two. My most important goal today is to commit to logging in tonight, when I typically would be struggling. Easy or hard, either way my number one priority is to get on here tonight and be accountable.

Prairie, I'll be thinking about you today. I hope things go well for you. Losing a job is a very scary thing to contemplate.

MrsG and MinStar, I hope you find your lost energy soon. It seems like as soon as we stop drinking our bodies should celebrate by providing us with instant energy and endorphins, but I guess that's not how it works.

I hope everyone has a wonderful day today. If you woke up without a hangover and regrets you are off to a great start!

[Prairie Fairy]

Newbies Nest

To echo Blond Ambition - many people find they have to change out many of their friends because they have to lose their enablers. Oddly enough - my moderate friends are the ones having hardest time. my 3 best friends (to include the BF) who are also drinking buddies - although the BF was getting upset about how much I was using & it was creating real problems - my 2 GF's who were my drinking buddies - have been my biggest cheering section. I am really lucky.

If I lose my moderate friends and keep my closest ones - I am blessed. And very unusual.

Sighs. Time to get to work. Maybe today they will put me out of my misery (and the few other team members who could also be walking the plank.)

[gregorino]

Newbies Nest

Great Day to the Nest!

Been ridiculously busy again past several days and barely checking email and phone mssgs!

Got Chapter Two moved 80 miles south last Friday. Doesn't sound like much, but sailboats don't go much more than 6 or 7 miles an hour, so it was quite the day. Ended up pulling into a marina in the dark!

Boat is still on the opposite coast of Florida, so everything is a big project with tons of time in the car.

Had to work a 6 to 6 on Sunday and it was a giant cluster you-know-what. Didn't get out of there until 7:30 pm and was totally drained. Worked a more reasonable shift yesterday, and am getting ready to get back in there again shortly....gotta make the payments!

Unfortunately, I can't read back for the 4/5 days I've missed because it would be a few hours that I just don't have right now. So, apologies to all who may have directed a post my way - I'm not ignoring you and my hopes and good thoughts are with you all.

Quick shout-outs to BlondeA and Prairie - You both sound like you're doing fine and I am so proud of you both - you're becoming an important part of the Nest!

Patrice - Just don't quit trying - hardly anyone here got it right the first (or second, third...) time - stay close and re-evaluate the plan!

MrsRG - Congrats on 30 days - That's HUGE! Way to go!

Irie - Day one down, and now do day 2. That's all you have to do - Just don't drink today!

Minstar - Your fellow Nesters are right on - Detox takes some time...Be patient with your mind and with your body - they are self-healing and you will start feeling really good and coming out of the mental fog....just hang in there!

Belle - You're doing great. Just letting the Fledglings know that 22 days is possible is VERY important to post! Keep it goin'!

Hello to Kparty and Lilla and Herbie.

Audrey - Glad to see you back here - You CAN do this - rework that plan and this time will be the one!

All my love and appreciation to Ms Lav and Ms Byrdie - You two are The Best!

Gotta Fly Nesters! Be calm and stay strong!

[lolab]

Newbies Nest

Good morning everyone. Welcome to everyone from the past few days - Irie, I am so happy for you - that feeling is wonderful isn't it? way to be strong. It just gets better and better. Anna, YES - that did happen ALOT at first - that panicky feeling fades and the memory of how bad you felt fades...that's when I was my most vulnerable and then I'd get right back into the cycle again do ok, until inevitably I got out of control again.

Hello to steadyhands, nollie, herbie - day 6!, minstar - day 8!! - that tiredness - may come and go for awhile - read below, I plan to write a little bit, cantbelieve, windy - hope your heads better - that last one of mine lasted 3 days! - but thanks for the kind words and know that they are totally reciprocated.

lav - your unwavering support and advice is incredible and byrdie - your description of how things progress is invaluable - you have a knack for descrbing things to a t and for bringing out those feelings in others so that we can identify. and blondie (yea on 14 days!) - I'm a fan of Jolie, too....we need her back. And I've had those exact feelings that you posted about (was it on this thread?) about being sad when you realize the number of people that havent come back. Byrdie, I was wondering how you and lav felt - as you so get to know people and really do your best to help and always know that the power lies with them - not you - you can talk til you're blue in the face (heh heh Lav) and it doesn't make a bit of difference if someone isn't 100 % committed...

Hi lilla, great that you came right back and tried again!

you are doing great, mighty - day 24, belle - be careful- I said as I was spiralling back into drinking that I almost wish I didn't "know" that most people try to moderate after 30 days - it's like I was "expecting" to fail....so don't guarantee that it will happen - envision that it won't, OK? :l day 23 and if you just keep boing without expecting to fall off, just think where you'll be in another month. it's not aways easy to jump back on the horse. Audrey, I remember you - you moved to be closer to someone you met here, right? It's s nice to have you here...:l

Prairie, wow, you have lots going on. I will be thinking of you today. kparty, I wish I had advice on the site - just spend more time navigating around I guess? I'm sorry! hi mrsg - wow, you're doing great - CONGRATS on 30 days!!! Hey Patrice, I was wondering how you were! Glad you're gack - it sounds like you're doing lots of thinking and sorting things out and made some sound decisions...and I bet that behavior of your sons will improve since you have more time to devote to him...:h

GregorEEEEno!!! What a life you're living....it sounds fabulous to be living your dream...even though at times very challenging. We look forward to your next update.

Now my two cents for the day...:H Windy and I are heading into 8 weeks AF this coming weekend. (:l) I've still been thinking lots about this journey. When I was 6 days, or 13 days or even 30 days, I was still learning and still recovering. And now at day...hold on...day 51 - i still am. I feel better now than I did last week. I feel stronger today than I did yesterday! I look better than I did in October...there is NO WAY IN HELL that I want to waste the last two months of healing (physically, mentall, and emotionally) that I have done by taking a drink. Yes, one drink would be easy enough to recover from physically, but I know from past experience - my own and that of others on here - that one drink is only opening a can of worms. "I" don't turn around and walk away from it. I would do ok for a little while - only drinking on weekends or for "special occasions" but eventually I KNOW where it will lead and I'm not willing to do that again. THAT is why I am so impressed by all of you that come right back and re-commit after "slipping". That's what you HAVE to do - if the desperation that you felt in your first posts - was genuine - then you will be strong and keep going until you feel like I do. It's amazing - for me - two months to get where I am today - doesn't seem like that long at all....I am an entire world away from where I was in September. Like Byrdie - I started drinking (well - continued drinking - as I took AL to bed with me and drank myself through those 3 AM wake ups....) in the morning when I could...and like her - tried to pace myself so I wouldn't pass out too early. And the first thing I did when I walked in the door when I worked - was get a glass of something....and earlier this year when I quit - I was drinking vodka. But whenI started back up - I did so with pinot grigio....it was much less "bad" than vodka....ha. what a joke. And guess what? It progressed back to vodka. How could I be tempted for a second to go back to that life - when I think it through???

This doesn't happen overnight but in the whole scheme of things - the changes that can happen in you in a short amount of time are just unimaginable!!!!

I'm sad when I think about how I was last year for the holidays. I'm not going to dwell on it, but I was pathetic...and I won't be this year - and I'm very excited about that. :-)