Newbies Nest

[MinStar]

Newbies Nest

Morning Nesters!
Sounds like people are doing great today! Day 2 for me and am SOOOOO glad to be AL free and semi- alert! I am so tired still.

Good luck to you Americans for tomorrow. You know you can do it and have a great time. I can't wait to hear how your AF day went and how much MORE fun you all had.

Belle- forgot last night to say well done on being AF 30 days and great Doc results.
Started JV book last night- 35 pages in. Kinda still prepping and hasn't really got into the knuckle and bolts of it. I want to fast forward and skip pages but instead I am reading really really fast! LoL

Here's hoping D2 I am stronger than AL

[Nelz]

Newbies Nest

Nursie;1213462 wrote: Timpin great job! There have been plenty of mornings I have regretted drinking, but never one I regretted NOT drinking!
Hi Nesties,
Day 3. Slept better last night. (Xanax). Still quite irritable but drinking tons of water and taking my supps. I feel utterly exhausted too, so I'm just taking it easy. Had some fleeting thoughts of drinking today after work. I did the fast forward to hung over thing and said "eff that" lol. Mr. Nursie seemed happy to come home to a sober Nursie again.
I haven't got my "why aren't you drinking" answer picked out yet. Because it will be very obvious over the holidays and I can't waver!
Hey, did anyone see the Nicoderm CQ commercial for quitting smoking but they were in a Bar with beer everywhere? Lmao
It's normal and socially acceptable to quit smoking but if you quit drinking you have issues. Nevermind the knuckleheads who are still drinking! Lol so crazy.

That is without a doubt one of my favorite sayings I've ever heard on this board

[Unwasted]

Newbies Nest

:wave:Just wanted to say hi to everyone here and send hugs. Day 9 for me yea!! Stay strong through the TG holiday everyone - it's so worth it!:wave:

[noal]

Newbies Nest

That is a great statement.

Its the mornings when I feel most grateful for kicking this thing, white eyed and ready to go is how I want my mornings to be for the rest of my life.

Good luck everyone and hope you all have a wonderful sober Thanksgiving.

[if dreams were horses]

Newbies Nest

Minstar, this is also my day 2, over 40 hours of being AF. I count the hours also, for I would pour a glass of wine if I could not sleep, and would continue alfter that. Like the rest of you I am tired and cold, and I feel my face getting flush. Now when I wake at 3:30 I have Chamamile Tea instead of that glass of wine. I do plan to take day 2 to 3 to 4 and so forth. This time I am doing it for me, I do not have a good support system with my children, and have no spouse to talk to, so this site is my support system. I look forward to seeing you on day 3 with me. For you Americans have a Happy Thanksgiving, and good luck keeping AF.

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

IfDreams....this board is my total support system...it has been plenty of help for me. And on my terms, you know? Nobody forcing anything down my throat (so to speak). It has been my lifeline. There is always someone here, in some part of the world, feeling just what I am feeling. You are never alone around this nest.
Got thru yesterday...typically, I would have been sneaking drinks at every rest stop and dumping my empties in the sanitary napkin bin! Oh god, did I just say that? Glad to be free of that. Stay strong all, you are all in my thoughts and prayers. Love to all, Byrdie

[Prairie Fairy]

Newbies Nest

Pity Party for One please...

Have been laying here in bed - reading what seems every thread - this morning.

Not because I am tempted to drink this one away - I am just so emotionally spent from the past month that I don't want to get out of bed, eat breakfast, make cofffee, shower.

I will. I can not go down that path - there are people who rely on me - including me.

So - I have to quit crying - get moving- before my will caves in and dominoes fall.

I am sorry to be a big baby today. I really don't have any other place to be one. Everyone else sees the unsinkable Molly Brown.

[BelleGirl]

Newbies Nest

PF, just sending a big hug your way.:l
You are 2 days away from 30. That is HUGE! Caving now will not change anything, and will take away the "prize" that is coming your way in 2 days. Life can suck sometimes. I have had such a sucky year, which brought on major anxiety, which brought on more drinking, which brought on more major anxiety and etc etc etc.

Breaking the cycle when things are going bad is probably the most difficult. But I promise, if you stay the course you will not be sorry because you will be able to deal with things better. Why am I saying this...you already know all this. Hang in there girl, we are all cheering for you.:h

[BelleGirl]

Newbies Nest

...and one more thing. When I feel like i can't get out of bed and go on, I remember what a friend's father used to say (he passed away last year at 92 yrs of age). "Get up, Get a shower and Get going! I try to remember that on my darkest days.

[slowly sinking]

Newbies Nest

HI All.....Day 2 for me too...I had a good night..no cravings but just missed the "motion" of sipping wine and playing my bass...instead, I sipped lemon water and played my bass.
I packed up all my hubby's things(he left last week and I haven't heard from him since)...rented a storage unit for his things and that's what's keeping me busy today.

BelleGirl is right..breaking the cycle is so difficult..but what other choice do we have? If we keep doing what we're doing, we're gonna keep getting what we've been getting.....

Love and strength to all of you...we can do this! xxxxSS

[MinStar]

Newbies Nest

If Dreams Were Horses and Slowly Sinking! Well done on D2? Hope you are still feeling strong and ready to go for d3:goodjob:

All American Nesters- Sending you lots of love and strength. I hope tomorrow goes great!

:l

Bella- what wise words.

AFM- more Jason Vale- about 20 pages in. Not sure what to make of his style of writing and approach to AL. I can see why he is so easy to read (already 50pages in and only started last night) But I have this niggly feeling about his way of writing- like he is being really condescending. Not sure. Still not feeling the need to drink at all. Supoermarket had offers for 3bottles for 10 and my Sister asked if we should get some in. I said I wont be drinking it but she can get some for herself. Normally, I would be saying things like "oh my goodness what a bargain!'" I would then get them and manage to kill the three bottles before the weekend!::upset:

Enjoy your AF day nesters

[sobafun]

Newbies Nest

Hi there.

Day 4 coming up. I'm feeling really good..despite a few stressors yesterday. And I had no cravings for AL, ...than goodness. Rhe last binge still makes me cringe.

My new motto is Chhose life, not fog.

Have a great day all.

[Prairie Fairy]

Newbies Nest

I have a feeling I could write a review of the merits of various waterproof mascaras.

At least I slept. When in total melt down - I sleep. I am guessing I'm return from Thanksgiving travel on Saturday...work on some things that need doing...and then marathon crash. For whatever reason - my psyche heals from a 16 - 18 hour sleep like the dead coma. I know that and would have allowed that today - but I need to be on the road before traffic is out of hand getting out of town.

I am going to put the meditation for day Hypnos on during the drive - reread the instructions - and they are supposed to trigger the overnight learning and Hypnos triggers if played for an hour in the background. I don't want to drink. I don't want to make this worse. And the new mix (besides total abstinence) has the happy happy addition of facing adversity bravely as well as forgiving oneself the past - which three hours of subliminal pep talk can't hurt.

So BelleGirl - much like your Dad, I thought about mine this morning. As a child I was on what had to be the worst sports team in my pee wee league - we lost to everyone by at best a 6 - 1 margin. After a particularly awful 10-1 loss - I was crying "Poor Pitiful Pearl" in the car...oh woe is me, we can never win, we are losers, I am going to quit.

My Dad pulled over and read me the riot act. It was along the lines of "PF - you are a (insert last name here) and Last Names don't QUIT. EVER. We may lose. We may look stupid on the field. But once we have committed to play - WE DON'T QUIT. I won't have a quitter in this family do you understand me so you will NOT withdraw from this team. Next week you will be on that field, you will do your best, and if is not enough? You will be a good sport, shake hands, and not embarrass yourself or shame me by your behavior. AM I CLEAR?!"

I thought about that today. Once a few years back I told him how much that lecture had shaped how I looked at life. He didn't even remember it. That doesn't matter - it still did - because it is emblematic of how he approached life before he became crippled up with a million medical problems.

So one of the things I worry about - is what did I say to my kids - that I don't remember - that shaped them in ways I don't know? And would it make me proud or break my heart.

So today - while I am driving on my own and no one can see it - I'll cry. But I will not let it break me. I will not fail. I would like the answer to my question to be that I made them stronger and better - not weaker.

Day 28 - today I •will• be stronger that AL.

[Herbie]

Newbies Nest

Just a quick pop in, Mom just went into surgery hoping all goes well... I am doing fine and AF

[if dreams were horses]

Newbies Nest

Good luck to your Mom Herbie, I miss my Mom terribly, and PF, you are lucky you had the Dad you had, when you wondered what you said to your children that you do not remember that would shape them, I would like to tell a story if I may.
Recently my youngest son and his girl friend had a preemie girl at 2lb 2oz. I wanted to see her so I told them I was going to the hospital. Visiting hours was over but the nurse let me see her, we were not sure if she would make it she was so small. I did not know my son was coming. After a few days I found out the girlfriend was really upset and told me not to try to see the baby again for I will not be allowed in. Of course this upset me. When she called and tried to tell me she did not say I could not see the baby I lost it and raised my voice, yes I had some wine in me. She will not forgive me for seeing the baby or raising my voice. I have not seen the baby for 3 months, she is home and doing well. Now my daughter sides with the girl. Again I got angry and said some things I should not have and now she will not speak to me, but she is always angry with me, and yes again I was drinking. So I want to take control and not allow AL to put me in those situations again. My family is supportive about the above situation, and so are my friends. Some day my daughter will understand we do not treat our parents that way, I hope before it is too late. Regardless of what my father was, we treated him with respect.