Newbies Nest

[Prairie Fairy]

Newbies Nest

Oh and BelleGirl - get to GNC or the VitaminShoppe and get GABA 750's - it's the relaxant your brain released when you drank or smoke...Walgreen/CVS won't have it - it's in the single amino acid section. Rehab centers use it to naturally calm you down when you are anxious. See the nutrition thread for info...a full amino profile capsule at the same time (IMHO) seems to potentiate the effect as does a B vitamin called inositol - if you can find it by itself in lower doses - hard. More important to get the full spectrum amino's in and let them plus the GABA in a higher dose - soothe out he brain. It's not a Xanax but with some passionflower/chamomile tea - ta da!!!! CHILL out.

[Steady Hands]

Newbies Nest

Hi Everyone

I am proud to read all the great posts and days AF!

Nursie - I am having a hard time with my family from a while before I quit AL. I am angry and feel used and blah, blah.... It only occured to me late this afternoon that I might be causing these fights just to keep them away...

Not "good" advice, just me admitting that I need to be left alone to become strong against AL with no other addict in denial pressuring me to drink.

Glad you immediately came back to the nest!

[Nursie]

Newbies Nest

Thank you Steady. I am back in the nest with velcroe and crazy glue.

[Herbie]

Newbies Nest

Wow everyone is doing so well... so much support from everyone, what a group
I just got caught up on all the post since i left for my trip,,, I am so inspired by you all, you all bring so much to the table
I am still pooped from the trip and I am going to take a bit of a nap

17 days AF!!!

[Prairie Fairy]

Newbies Nest

BelleGirl - had to take my own advice...

Hey BelleGirl -

I got walloped by a panic attack about Monday and the job. Not a little panic - a bawl my head off, had I finished the drive home to my empty place - I'd have been at the wine shop - no if's ands or buts.

But in an unlooked for blessing - I was at the start of the LONG drive - not the end. I pulled off at the next exit, got a drink and took two GABA's and two Glutamine capsules. (ran out of amino's - underestimated how many to bring - next time will assume that holiday + family + AL everywhere equals additional craving/stress supplementation). Anyway - I pulled off the highway to tell you - seriously - not a Xanax. But I am not coming out of my skin anymore.

For what it's worth - I understand why supposedly some rehab center nurses have GABA capsules in their pockets - to empty under patients tongues. I get it.

I won't ever be without these until I'm more sure my brain chemistry has straightened up. It calms the wildly wackadoodle panic and the l-Glut covers the craving- between them - my bacon has been saved time and again.

[Prairie Fairy]

Newbies Nest

49 miles out - someone remind me why I shouldn't get that Malbec - the siren is out of hand...

[lolab]

Newbies Nest

Prairie-when you get home? Is that what you mean? Bet you're almost home now... Take the next few minutes to think hard about the consequences. You'll feel like you let yourself down terribly. You'll feel like shit in the morning
You'll undo all the good you've done for your body

[lolab]

Newbies Nest

Just wanted to get that in before I continued...

You'll let down your SO

you'll open a can of worms
You know itll most likely be progressively harder each time you try to quit

You don't want to be one of the ones that we are all worried about right now... Who started when you did and now don't come around

Let me go back

[lolab]

Newbies Nest

And "Oh yeah - last nights Conversation with the BF was terrifying. Phone log said we had talked 2.5 hours night before. WTF?

The I got the ultimatum last night of if you want to be with me - you know what you have to do. And I had to play detective and rile him up to find out WTF. Terrified the crap out of me. It's a family sit he's known about but it seems the wine made me share more of the long time multi-generational history and now he is so pissed there are family members that I or my kids are around - he won't be.

But OMG - it could have been anything - he was so mad and I didn't know why. This can't go on.

Playing the hypnotics today 24/7 as I am home with flu. Hoping to get a jump start on reprogramming the booze brain."

That was YOU talking not too long ago yet a lifetime ago

Do you really want to go back there?

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Greetings Nesters,

PF - not sure what's going on with you
Whatever it is - wine is not going to help & that's all I'm going to say. It has to be your choice!

Glad to see everyone else doing OK

Just finished up my Thanksgiving/ double BD celebration here - stuffed & all went well.
My son came in carrying some large jug of specially brewed beer he gets somewhere & shared it with a few people. I looked at it & thought - yuck. Did nothing for me & for that I am grateful

Wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!

Lav

[Prairie Fairy]

Newbies Nest

Nope - and didn't. Realized my blood sugar had gone WHACKED - hadn't eaten in way too long, was super upset, had a long drive and too much caffeine - all prescriptions for a dance with the Alien.

I cranked up my daytime subliminal Hypnos to LOUD, focused on the sounds, thought about all the people I would let down including myself and still wasn't sure that was enough. Dug up the emergency rations of high dose L-Glut chewables that are micronized L-Glut so they hit bloodstream WHAMMO - and 10 minutes later the full complement had me riding the wave out.

To the point where I HAD to stop and get food, seltzer and tea as I goofed and left them back at the families - and to get them - I HAD to pass the wine aisle. With the high dose L-Glut kicked in - I passed it, no issues - even hungry.

So here I am - daytime subliminals on, book and cat on lap, dinner partly done (albeit super duper late) the full spectrum amino's now on-board, coconut seltzer and herbal tea at the ready. I am good to go. I have made this one through.

Damn it was close. That's what this nest and this place is for - Butt Velcro and survival straps.

Thanks everybody...

[BelleGirl]

Newbies Nest

PF...you are awesome. That had to be such a hard day, but what a VICTORY over the alien. Reading that has made me that much stronger tonight.

Thanks so much for the GABA info. Sounds like it really works.
:goodjob::goodjob::goodjob:

[Herbie]

Newbies Nest

[QUOTE=BelleGirl;1215815] PF...you are awesome. That had to be such a hard day, but what a VICTORY over the alien. Reading that has made me that much stronger tonight.

:goodjob:

Reading Jason Vales book tonight... my biggest triggers for AL have been in the stress area... just getting home from a hard days work etc.. and he writes..

at relaxing times .. the drink gets credit but AL is incapable of creating a genuine feeling of relaxation... most of the time I would take just one mouthful and think that it was the drink that was helping me unwind.. It didn't even occur to me that the AL hadn't had time to take effect. The truth is that your brain will do as you tell it. If you tell your brain you cannot relax without a drink the the brain will say OK...

With my first swallow of the "wonderful" glass of wine, I would feel so much better... realizing it was all in my head... I will try and keep this in mind the next time I am stressed and want to reach for that wine..

[Steady Hands]

Newbies Nest

Day 17!

Hi Nesters

PF -:goodjob:


LoLab - :goodjob:

Lav - I had to go to the mall with my ex Saturday morning and he reeked of it!!:yuk:

Herbie - Thx for the info from the book. And congrats on 18 days!

Hope you all have a good day.

[if dreams were horses]

Newbies Nest

So here I go into day 6, yesterday was actually a good day. The weather here in Southwestern Ontario was beautiful.
This morning I woke at 2 a.m. not sure if that is a bad sign, but will see. Reading everyones posts is inspirational. To share all our struggles and fears helps us know we are not alone. My family has no idea what I am trying to do. They knew about it 2.5 years ago, and knew I gave in, but no one judged me except my ex. I will try to come back at a more appropriate time of day. Maybe I can go back to sleep now that I have shared with you.