Newbies Nest

[FlyAway]

Newbies Nest

twitt;1231206 wrote: yea i definatly have alot of passion for the residents most are so sweet, I generally work the dementia floor but there can be some nasty ones too

They don't know what they're doing though. That is the sad thing. I almost wish that my mom would pass because I know that she would hate her life right now if she had any idea what was going on. It's like she's already gone and an alien has taken over her body. She may say or do things that my mom would never do. A few years ago she and I went out to lunch together. She had just been diagnosed with mild dementia then. She told me that her greatest fear in life was ending up with dementia and not knowing what she was doing. She was always the one who took care of everyone else. I know it doesn't matter now. I know that she's unaware of what she's become, but I'm sad for her.

[twitt]

Newbies Nest

i am so sorry for your mom but it is harder for the family alwas y hoping. thst some how they might snap out of it is heart breaking

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Just a quick wish for a good & safe night for everyone in the nest!

twitt & FlyAway, I'm a retired RN now running a teeny embroidery/monogramming biz from my home shop. I spent nearly 30 years dealing with the sick, injured & elderly. Glad I did it but I was spent when I left it.....takes a lot out of you

Lav

[Juja]

Newbies Nest

FlyAway;1231211 wrote: They don't know what they're doing though.

Sometimes I wish my mother didn't know what she was going through--blind, deaf and can hardly speak, or get around. It eats at me everyday, and I don't know what to do. She has her mind, but for the most part, she can only sit around, or sleep. No radio or TV, and not many visitors because it's so difficult to converse with her.:upset:

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Well,
Good morning Nesters! Where is everyone??
Busy, busy I'm sure but please check in so we know you are OK

Have a great AF Friday!
Lav

[Unwasted]

Newbies Nest

Hi Everyone,

To those of you with parent issues, I have to join your club. My dad is in a bad way also - I guess it's nature's way of helping us let go?? Anyway, I totally get it.:l:l Eckhart Tolle's A New Earth - Awakening to Your Life's Purpose, talks about how when our world starts contracting, i.e. we start losing people to illness and death that can be an opening to help us begin exploring our spiritual side. I've embraced that idea and it's helping me tremendously.

Hope everyone else is doing okay during this often difficult time of year. I'm looking forward to the new year............SOBER..............

Love to you all!:l:l

[windy]

Newbies Nest

Hi Nesters,

Just checking in for Lav and perhaps for my own sanity too. I am trying to make the best of the Holiday Season by appreciating all the loved ones that are thankfully still with me and the community that takes care of myself and others. It really is the small things that matter and make a difference. I need to open my eyes more for the subliminal.

Twit -- You are doing great...keep posting and opening yourself up a little more. Loose some of the guilt and look forward to the future if you can, just for 5 minutes; then maybe 15; then maybe an hour and pretty soon you have a whole day you can feel good. It is possible -- I promise. And like our Byrdie says "Today is all that counts".

ta ta for now.

[Pinecone]

Newbies Nest

Good morning friends!

I was very close to losing my mother this summer to illness but she recovered. I still frequently dream about it, including last night. Very timely discussion for me. I guess it reminds me about how much we have in common. I remember drinking way too much that week to "cope." I hated the guilt of feeling like I needed that crutch...

I know that some people here are really down on themselves about this problem that we all have in common. I just want to say that you almost don't have the right to give up on yourself. When I found this forum, the little voice really didn't want me to start coming on here, because of what would happen. It really didn't want me to Google about alcohol treatment options, etc. If some part of you brought yourself here, then that is a huge step! Plenty of people are literally turning a different color and dying because of this addiction. If you are lucky enough to have found a reason to come here, you need to listen to your instinct. It can be tough, but I don't regret quitting drinking one bit. Sorry, coming off my soapbox now...I just get a little emotional when I think about how lucky I was to wake up to the reality of the rabbit hole called drinking.

I wish everyone a wonderful sober holiday season!

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Wow Pine...your post brought tears to my eyes. It's so true, drinking was about to change my color. It's a shame it happened, but it did and now all we can do is go forward. It's been a great (almost) year sober. The best year of my life actually. I finally woke up, and just in time to enjoy the world I had made for myself, but was missing. Thank you for that perspective. We all have much to be thankful for, beginning with finding ourselves again. Byrdie

[canadian gal]

Newbies Nest

Hey nesters!

Pinecone- great post. You are so right on with it. If I hadn't tried to stop drinking this year, I am sure that I'd be dead by the time I hit 40 or sooner. We do have a lot to be thankful for.

Twitt- I think most people have already said it on here and it's true. You can't change the past. But you can change the present. Being sober is sometimes hard because there are things in life that we need to deal with that are hard. I lost my mom 12 years ago (when I was 17). That was hard. But at that time, I didn't turn to the bottle and I am glad for it. I was able to push through it sober. I dealt with my feelings and didn't drink them away and put them in a file marked "deal with later".
I have many regrets too. I saw a show where the man who started up amazon.com said he did something called minimizing regrets. Basically, he pictured himself when he was 80 and could look back at his life to see how many regrets he could possibly have. I figured that if I didn't stop drinking now, I would have many many more regrets when I am 80. So while everyone has regrets, you can work towards minimizing them by staying sober.

Well I'm at the end of day 4 and feeling great. Looking forward to day 5 (Christmas Eve..Yea!!!). Sending you all positive energy! Keep up the great work everyone!

[Turnagain]

Newbies Nest

Beautiful post, Pinecone.

It is tragic how AL can strip away our dignity and self-respect and makes us dislike ourselves deeply and it is incredible how sobriety can return what we lost ten-fold. Pinecone...it is a timely and inspirational message you have shared...

CG, Twitt and others plugging away here in the midst of the holidays...I just want to encourage you. You are building strong AF muscles....every time you resist the booze that gets pushed on you this time of year....you are building positive new neural pathways in your brain. What a gift you are giving yourself!

This will be my first sober holiday in I don't know when. Whoo Hoo....being AF is incredible! I wonder why I was ever scared to let go of it for good because the result is more than good!

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Windy, Pinecone, Byrdie, CG & Turn-
You are all about to find out just how wonderful an AF Christmas really can be - I'm happy for all of you :l

[scottish lass]

Newbies Nest

It was earlier this year when someone identified how many of us at MWO are caregivers. Whether it is professional, or responsible for family members, or animals - we are a group who care so much about others that we forget to care for ourselves, then our "care" becomes escape in terms of AL. I too am an RN, and absolutely love my work - but it does take a lot out of you - same as those of you caring for elderly, infirm parents.
I am really struggling just now - I am amazed by the number of rituals, traditions etc that I have around the holidays that include AL. I am doing lots of usual things, but realise that something is missing and I am really struggling to not restort to old behaviours. PineCone - your post is timely, there are people dying from AL and that was one of my largest fears - I have no idea why that cannot remain foremost in my mind - I hope that my liver is not severely impacted by my unwise choices, but why on earth do I want to risk further damage - this is totally NUTS! Today is day 26, and I am having a good day, but I want a drink!! DAMN IT!! Thank goodness this nest is here, otherwise I can guarantee that I would be drinking now - posting instead - I hope we can all stay strong for the next two weeks, until we are thru this holiday period.
Twitt - hang in - for sure this is not easy, but nor is the alternative.......

[Herbie]

Newbies Nest

Hello All

Wonderful post Pinecone...

SL I know what you mean about the caregiving, I am not a nurse but have been in a caregiving role for over a year and it has been really hard.. You are right about the ritual of drinking ... I went to lunch with a friend of mine and on the way home I wanted to stop at the local gas, gun, food and liquor store and pick up a couple of bottles of wine for the holiday.... (yes they really do sell beer, wine and liquor in the same place 1500 guns are for sale... its MO what can I say) but stopped instead and resupplied myself with my diet ice green tea... it was kind of hard to do, but I did and rewarded myself with a chocolate chip cookie!!

Hope you are all have a great start to the Christmas weekend for those of you who celebrate Christmas..

[Unwasted]

Newbies Nest

SL, just try to relive in your mind the awful way alcohol makes you feel - hungover! Your body screaming and then beating yourself up for compromising your success.

Sending us all peace and strength.:l