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    Newbies Nest

    Hey all. A hello to newbies and hugs to all. Happy new year. Just settling down to read past posts. I'm not really posting but finding I get a moment or two to read a few posts. This one moves do fast!

    So many new people. I hope you find the strength and courage so lovingliy given on this site. Sorry for typos but I'm on my iPhone.

    Thanks lavande and windy for reply/thinking of me. I am still AF. Think the last drink I had was in November some time. Three days drinking in November and two starts I be AF. So far the second one is working good.

    Fleeting moments to drink but very fleeting. An to be honest I actually don't want to drink. NYE was fun. Nice to be sober and not to be worried who was noticing how much I drank. Or to be be constantly vigilant on where my next drink was coming from. Like a previous poster just said. It was good to Really laugh. Still, the fleeting thoughts and a dream where I ha some bucks fizz have me worried. It would be easy to go back to my old ways so I am probably going to re-read Jason Vale again.

    Still my sleeping isnt going too well am thinking I shoul get some blood work done. Im in vitamins but wondering if it is my iron levels.

    Sorry to be short. Worrie I'll lose this post! So stay safe nesters cx

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      Newbies Nest

      Hi Friends, I just wanted to check in and say hello! Wow this place has been busy. I have been working alot and I didn't check in yesterday, but I still read. Welcome Sufi and Broken Halo, you are in the right place here! I am very happy about the new year and the opportunity to stay AF for a whole calendar year.

      Fallen Angel, yes I think it is pretty common to have ups and downs. Something I do is to try to listen to my internal dialogue and figure out who is doing the talking. If it is "you know who," then I'm not answering the call. Also, it sounds like you are staying away from alcohol centric events because you are being protective of what you are trying to do. That's just good common sense. Just give yourself some time to experience what you are going through and trust that it is so worth it.
      "When you have faults, do not fear to abandon them." Analects of Confucius
      AF 11/12/11

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        Newbies Nest

        Hi Newbies!

        Looks like it was a pretty successful holiday weekend all around
        I'm very happy for all of you & promise you things Do get much better & easier as time goes on.
        The freedom is the best part for me.

        Wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!
        Lav
        AF since 03/26/09
        NF since 05/19/09
        Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

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          Newbies Nest

          With my eyes lowered I creep back to the nest. I had such a great summer living AF and did not take the sage advice from many who tried to guide me away from drinking on my vacation 4 mos. ago. I have been drinking copiously until yesterday. I hate what AL does to me physically and the mental torment is unrelenting . I am humbled & need to stay AF. I have much I would like to say but am down on myself at the moment so I will just end by wishing everyone a good & happy NEW YEAR.

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            Newbies Nest

            Hyper, I will join you in coming back as the physical and mental torment is making me crazy. I can't bear it anymore...and am so down on myself as well....

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              Newbies Nest

              Hey Piper, I am sorry we are in the same boat. Not a good place to be. I am planning on hanging in there till the clouds clear, you do the same. Hope WE can stay committed to being AF.

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                Newbies Nest

                hey! Yes, Windy, I'm home. Feeling great! I just have to really have some time to concentrate on posts in order to say anything worthwhile haha - and I don't seem to get any uninterrupted computer time with everyone home!

                Hyper and Piper (hee hee) I'm glad you're back and that maybe you can do it together. I know the strength of my sobriety twin Windy has supported me more than a few times in the past few months.

                Goodnight everyone - hang on tight in the nest - it's windy outside!
                ~

                Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.

                Sobriety date: Sept 26, 2011

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                  Newbies Nest

                  Just stopping by to wish everyone well. Hyper, at least you know now. Vacations have been my downfall in the past too.

                  Piper, the agonizing mental torment - so much worse than not drinking. And, eventually not drinking starts to feel normal. It's just keeping the reality of the fact that we're not missing out on anything when we get rid of alcohol. I keep reminding myself that the people here who are successful at abstaining say it gets better and that they don't ever regret giving up al.

                  Tim - you're almost at 60 days. Excellent job for getting through a party without drinking. I stayed at home, so I wasn't put to that kind of test.......you should be proud!

                  Fallen Angel - you're doing really well - keep it going. And, yes, I have felt exactly how you describe. Remember, though, the ups and downs take a while to even out. It took us a long time to get like this, so we have to be patient. You have to create a new way of feeling like yourself - the old you needs to go bye bye.........so it will feel weird for a while. Hope you'll keep it going because you have to do some work before you get anything in return.......it's worth it. Just keep reminding yourself of how wretched you feel hungover.


                  Min, I think I'll read Jason Vale again too. He motivates me to see through the lie of alcohol and everything surrounding it.

                  Just give yourself some time to experience what you are going through
                  Pinecone - wise words...........Feelings won't kill us - we have to learn to live with them. It takes time to create a new reality for ourselves. We've lived in the alcohol cocoon for so long - it's been a safety net...........gotta ride it out and give it time knowing it gets better!

                  Lola, Lav, Andrew and all the other nesters (sorry, multiple pages of you guys)........be well.............

                  Peace and strength to us all.:l

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                    Newbies Nest

                    Hi Piper and Hyper - welcome back - come and join the January challenge (Jammin January) - lots of friendly faces there!
                    Today was tough, ore because of old habits etc. Got thru it by the skin of my teeth - my ex brought my girls over for dinner and I had a melt down when they left - really strong desire for a big glass of wine, which would have been ok, but I know i would have finished the bottle and more! So had a good cry and some retail therapy - got a new order of sleep aids and vitamins - thansk Lav for your advice. As said before, getting my daily vitamins out in the moring reinforces the self care as opposed to self poisoning!
                    See you all tomorrow....
                    “The only courage you will ever need is the courage to live the life you want"

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                      Newbies Nest

                      You know what is one of the best effects of being AF (ha ha, my fourth day)? Time at my disposal. No excuses why I cannot go for a concert or a party (its in the evening, so Ill be drunk), I can really go now. Or I can work or watch star trek or write to old friends. I was in a constant rush for time, because so many hours were spent behind the closed doors of my house. Every minute is precious for me now, and free time seems to be stretching out into future, waiting for me to use them in the best possible way, for others and for the first time now for myself too.

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                        Newbies Nest

                        Good morning Nesters!

                        sufi - I agree with your sentiments 100%. The best part of AFness is the freedom!
                        Congrats to you, keep up the great work!

                        SL, good choice
                        That glass (or entire bottle of wine) has never & never will make anything better!
                        I know it's a struggle dealing with your ex & the girls coming & going & I'm sorry about that. Using your alone time to build your strength & get your bearings is the best bet for you. Keep that self care going ~ you're worth it

                        Welcome back Hyper & piper! Buckle in & stick around with us. Let us know what your plans are to kick the beast out of your lives.

                        Unwasted, timpin, lola, windy, byrdie & everyone - wishing you a terrific AF Monday.

                        I'm off to Curves now to work off those extra cookies
                        Lav
                        AF since 03/26/09
                        NF since 05/19/09
                        Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

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                          Newbies Nest

                          Dangerous Day 3 for me. This seems to often be the day I give up my AF goals, so I will be villigant today. On the positive side, if I make it through day 3, I'm usually good for a while.

                          I'm heading in to work on what should be a vacation day (ah, the pleasures of management!) so I'm short on time, but I wanted to say good morning to all the nesters, and will check in tonight.
                          ~ The chief cause of failure is trading what you want most for what you want now ~
                          -----------------------------------
                          Goal #1 - 7 days AF -

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                            Newbies Nest

                            morning! quick post - but I wanted to make a suggestion Irie. I hope you don't mind! Change your thinking to WHEN I make it through day 3, I will be on to day 4....and will have just the start of an amazing AF life!

                            I am still amazed by the things I am learning - and how different life feels every day...rather than running in that hamster wheel of being unable to break away from alcohol. Take away those "ifs" and you'll be rid of that tiny 1% of you that is keeping you from succeeding...:-)
                            ~

                            Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.

                            Sobriety date: Sept 26, 2011

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                              Newbies Nest

                              Wicked Mom, I want to thank you for your post. It makes me feel like I can do this. I want that feeling you described of your husband and friend drinking and your complete indifference to joining them. I can feel myself getting there, and I'm looking forward to the complete natural acceptance that I just don't drink any more. It is feeling more normal by the day and I think of alcohol less, but I'm looking forward to having more time under my belt.

                              Irie, remember what Supercrew says, there are no reasons to drink, only excuses. So stay strong my friend. You can do it.

                              Scottish Lass, I'm sorry you're going through it with the ex - that's so hard I know. I'm hoping you made a connection with K9 who also lives in Cali.....I think you guys could be great support for each other.

                              Hyper and Piper - well you have to do this together since your names rhyme as Lola pointed out. It's so worth it..........I can't believe how much better I feel. I had a melt down the other night over something and made it without al. The more we do that, the more we understand our own strength and then it bolsters us to keep going without the crutch of alcohol...........I really hope you both can start getting some AF days. It's an adjustment but it can be done.

                              Lav, Sufi, Pinecone, Min, Byrdie, Windy, Fallen Angel, Andrew, Flyaway and any new nesters coming by today (hope I didn't miss anyone).......Sending everyone peace and strength, and the wisdom to remember that we are giving up nothing when we stop drinking!

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                                Newbies Nest

                                Hi Nesters,

                                So many wise words of wisdom today, must be the energy of a new year. I was reading your post Sufi and it really made me realize what a different person I am without alcohol; all the energy and fresh perspective on things. I truly feel as if I can now be the person I was meant to be -- good or bad. Of course, the good takes more work, which I intend to do..totally another story. Anyway, alcohol was a crutch that was holding me back, bogging up my mind and spirit. Each and every day you remain AF will open up new opportunities for you to become who you are meant to be. Just keep plugging along and before you know it, it will be one week; then 13 days; then 100 days; then the rest of your life.

                                I am just beginning to realize what a bastard it truly is and what a grip it had on me now that I am getting rid of it. There is a real reason we refer to alcohol as the beast. Cliche I know, but the truth, as it's grip is truly beyond this world. It takes time and effort and some true self discovery, but the peace that comes with it is totally amazing...I promise. Your mind will become your own once again; like a teenager who hasn't yet had her first drink. Get her back!

                                I am reaching a milestone soon and in the beginning I didn't not know what I wanted to do after my initial goal was accomplished, because I now believe alcohol was clouding my vision. Things are so much more clear now and I know I want alcohol to be out of my life for good and I know I can do it with clear determination. 2012 AF is doable for me with your help.

                                Thanks to one and all for your support; especially Lola for being my accountability partner and so much more, and and Byrdie who hits it right on each and every time and is truly a wonderful friend. And Lav...always there with her wise words -- priceless.

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