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    Newbies Nest

    the cravings are calling bad, i dunno if its the weather and all the friends i have want to dink, its 65 out and warm in january... but cannot let the cravings get to me.. i thought about moderating, ive done that bought half the rum bottle at 4 hours later, that just made me get my friend to go get me more.. moderation doesnt work for me or really anyone ive talked to about it.. that pint of rum will just turn into a gallon a day again.. not going back to that again....i like to wake up ith no bloated stomach, sweaing, no desire to eat... will try my est and stay just AF

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      Newbies Nest

      GUY,
      Sounds like you need some new friends
      If your current friends are not going to support your AF efforts then dump them.
      I refuse to go near any so-called friend, relative, neighbor, business associate......anyone who does not serve my need to remain AF!!!!!

      It is always your choice
      AF since 03/26/09
      NF since 05/19/09
      Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

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        Newbies Nest

        Guy, when the cravings hit it's hard to remember what it is we really want. What you have achieved is phenomenal and life changing! Don't throw it all away for a little release that you will very soon regret. I'm pulling for you. Really, really pulling for you. I know you can't get through this momentary struggle.
        ~ The chief cause of failure is trading what you want most for what you want now ~
        -----------------------------------
        Goal #1 - 7 days AF -

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          Newbies Nest

          I refuse to go near any so-called friend, relative, neighbor, business associate......anyone who does not serve my need to remain AF!!!!!
          Lav, my sentiment exactly. I will compromise for no one, even if it means not having them as a friend. Stay strong Guy, you don't want to go to the dungeon again, trust me.

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            Newbies Nest

            Hi nesters,

            On the subject of not letting anyone compromise the quit, a friend called in the week to arrange a visit for tonight. I told her I wouldn't be drinking. We were on Skype and I saw her face She said she didn't mind drinking alone. I was a bit worried but had time to strengthen my resolve and make a plan. Anyways, I called last night to see if she was coming as I hadn't heard. No plan needed as no visit being made. Nuff said!
            You were born with wings, why prefer to crawl through life? Rumi

            :lilangel:

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              Newbies Nest

              Thanks Unwasted for your comment.
              Yes! I should and CAN make this solitary time work for me. Maybe cum laude my degree?(No! - Then I won't have time for the nest!!)
              I got excited by the idea that I can re-invent myself in the next 2 years. By then have walked my AF journey long enough to be solid and confident in it and have had enough time to "kiss" my old friends and toxic family members goodbye...
              12-20-2012 AF
              Respect yourself enough to walk away from anything that no longer serves you, grows you, or makes you happy.

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                Newbies Nest

                Wow FF - It just shows you!!
                12-20-2012 AF
                Respect yourself enough to walk away from anything that no longer serves you, grows you, or makes you happy.

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                  Newbies Nest

                  Guy, this is what separates the men from the boys!!! One of the beauties of this site is that our very own words are here for us to go back and read. Sometimes, when I get down in the dumper, I go back to when I first started here, and I read just how hard I was trying to get this monkey off my back. You worked HARD to be where you are today...just get over that rough edge...you be will stronger and proud tomorrow when you look back at it. Don't let the G/S/R brothers room to get back in (guilt/shame/remorse). Do something else, bake something to give away to a neighbor kid get out and take a walk in this beautiful weather we are having!! You can do anything you want to do today, except one little thing! Go and do something good for someone else! Shoo...now go! xo, Byrdie
                  All you gotta do, is get thru this day. AF 1/20/2011
                  Tool Box
                  Newbie's Nest

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                    Newbies Nest

                    Steady Hands;1240514 wrote: Thanks Unwasted for your comment.
                    Yes! I should and CAN make this solitary time work for me. Maybe cum laude my degree?(No! - Then I won't have time for the nest!!)
                    I got excited by the idea that I can re-invent myself in the next 2 years. By then have walked my AF journey long enough to be solid and confident in it and have had enough time to "kiss" my old friends and toxic family members goodbye...
                    I'm with you Steady on kissing the toxic goodbye. I was a little pissed off I didn't even get a call, but like you say, it just shows you! Looking forward to reinventing myself aswell Just think of all the new friends we'll make as we move into a new era once the space is cleared.
                    You were born with wings, why prefer to crawl through life? Rumi

                    :lilangel:

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                      Newbies Nest

                      so much strength....these are hard realizations to be made....I told a relative thanks but I didn''t want to bring home any of her dry red homemade wine - I haven't been drinking....and she said "humph....another one bites the dust..."

                      On the fliip side - I feel soooo good today. My sleep is coming together...and I have just come down from putting the last of the holiday stuff in the attic...while up there I pulled 4 pair of "too small" pants out of a bin - just to see - and all fit! I haven't been working out like crazy....this is pure bloat. Bloat that took up to 100 days to go away - but it has...and I look like the me that I kind of remember - when I check the mirror. :-)

                      Irie, you've done it....you've switched. :-) passive to active and now you're offering great support to others!:l
                      ~

                      Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.

                      Sobriety date: Sept 26, 2011

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                        Newbies Nest

                        Hi guys, I am so sad and angry and disappointed with myself. After doing so amazingly well over the holiday period I have lost it. I was over 40 days af and then the other day for a weird reason I went our and bought a bottle of wine and drank it all. I really dobt want this to ruin my af time and I am stumped as to why I did it. Anyone been there? I need help, I'm feeling horrible about myself. : (
                        45 days AF 24/11/11 - Jan 2012.
                        New day 1- 9 January !
                        Back again 27 May 2012 - day 1

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                          Newbies Nest

                          Hi Australia. Yes, we all know why you did it. Because we've all done it too. It's the strangest feeling isn't it? One moment you have no intention of drinking. The next moment you have a drink in your hand. Your body is on automatic pilot and your brain is way way way behind....

                          But just pick yourself up and don't do it again!!! Forget it and move on. Switch up a habit or two. Change your eating time. Don't drive by that liquor store. Go for a walk when you feel you'd like to get another bottle - do ANYTHING but don't go get another one!!!! Stay strong and rack up another 40 days!! And stay on here for support.
                          Ask yourselves, would you rather be a non drinker with an occasional desire to drink or a drinker with a constant desire to stop doing it?
                          (quote from Bean )

                          Goal: Survival

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                            Newbies Nest

                            Well i am back from work, enjoying my tea going to work on a 2nd one in a minute. Felt like shit but i expected that not like i havn:t gone to work hung over before. Kept saying a prayer all day when my brain wanted to convince me go get another bottle. I didn:t. I am going to email my daughters friend who has a health food store and get some prices on all the supplements i found on this site last night. Don:t buy any booze i can afford it. One thing i was wondering was that my daughter told me last night that i am stand-offish at times. Could that trait be because of al abuse?

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                              Newbies Nest

                              My wonderful helpers,
                              It is the end of day 9 for me; I have not had any cravings, I survived a few parties and lots of evening hours alone without a drop of A in house. My sleep became sound, I lost three kilos, my blood sugar is down, I look fresh and much younger. and I am constantly aware of your existence too - when the craving returns, I will rely desperately on your assistance. I will not stop being on guard, not for a second. I feel as if my guardian angel were following my every step, and here is a little poem of mine: (it is really quite nice in my language, and this is merely a self made translation, but I wanted to share it: INCANTATION

                              Holy angel guardian,
                              who have been assigned to me,
                              bend over my shoulders
                              and remain
                              until I feel your touch
                              and once again
                              become aware
                              that you are always there,
                              in the light,
                              just for me.

                              Bend over my weary self
                              dont allow me
                              to resist
                              and endow me
                              with a warm wave
                              of your compassion.

                              Thank you, angel,
                              that you exist.

                              Comment


                                Newbies Nest

                                What a lesson for me......

                                So I go 5 days AF and then a big, stressful business meeting Thursday. Followed up with a dinner at a fancy restaurant with a ton of people. My co-worker friend talked me into a glass of wine. I told her I was on a diet but she convinced me (I really did not have great will power) .... we really had a very stressful meeting. Of course that one glass of wine led to I don't know how many glasses. I got home at a reasonable hour, 10:30, made sure my kids were tucked in. In my stocking feet, i go walking down the stairs and slip.....all the way down on my hip and now i can barely walk. Dr. says my hip is not broken but this pain is far far worse than childbirth. I can't move and even lying still hurts. I will go back to dr. if still this bad on MOnday..... But WOW, what a wake up call. Now I am so determined.....that was my version of rock bottom. NO MORE WINE
                                I just won't anymore

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