Newbies Nest

[lolab]

Newbies Nest

Well, well, well….I don’t even know where to go back to to get back in the action here! 10 pages takes me back only 4 days…

Mumoftwo – it does take awhile for the thoughts to subside. Even now, I can still have moments of thinking about it – but it isn’t constant like it was in the beginning. I see someone who is taking antabuse as someone who is really committed…that is not messing around as you have taken the option off the table. I hope you’re doing well.

Minstar celebrated 75 days – I’m so glad for you and for the little princess….

Nursie, your friend is very lucky – but I also immediately thought that in a way this is a good thing for you too….you’re decision to be AF has to be reinforced by seeing all of this – and I know that helping someone out like that is always a good thing for us in trying to stay sober. It’s like posting here…giving back…for whatever reason – it helps. Did I miss your 30 day celebration? There have been so many in the past week or so!! Congratulations!

Lifechange, thanks for being proud of me…I lost my mom, so having someone say they’re proud of me is especially poignant right now…

Cara, Jolie’s right – I’d guess most of us lurked awhile before we discovered that our stories are all so similar…it’s really great to have this group to lean on and talk things through with them.

Belle and Steady – if you read back over my posts, I had extremely achey joints. My first quit, It was interfering with my sleep, and I think at one point I described it as walking and barely able to lift my feet…my hips ached – I was so miserable, I used it as an excuse (one of several) to drink again…This second time, I rode it out and it lasted less time, and it absolutely went away. Belle, I hope you’re feeling better – and congrats again on 30 days.

Byrdie and lav, you’ve been holding me up and keeping me AF these past couple of weeks….aren’t you tired??? Thanks for all the strength and love you’ve been sending me. Lav, I am so genuinely happy for you and for your family – with the amount of time that you are able to spend with them…and congratulations on the smoke free days too! Do you do one of those things that tell you how much you’ve saved money and life?

Allswell, thanks for the reminder of going back in time. It is an extremely helpful tool to go back and read our old posts (and others’) to see exactly why we came here in the first place…when things are going well, sometimes it’s easy to lose sight of how bad it really was.

Well, hello Irie – I see you’re coming up on your challenging time during your quit - your 11 day hurdle…I’ll be thinking of you. I love that you’re thinking about this vacation and talking about it here.I loved Byrdie’s and Unwasted reminders about the fantasy of ddrinking. “I can see that we miss lovely dinners on the beach because we are passed out in our room at 7 pm. How's that for romantic?” Would someone please bookmark these posts for me when I am planning my next vacation?!?!?! Hmmmm….antabuse for a trip. That is an interesting thought.

Stella, are you here????

Pronto, NO!! It’s not cheating to go to bed early to avoid drinking! I did it for quite awhile. I spent lots of time alone, reflecting – reading – there seems to be so much time in the beginning when our days aren’t being wasted away in a fog. And look at you…offering advice to others about the toolbox – only one week in – awesome!!!!!!

Inchains “thanks byrdie, so true, moderating for me consisted of heavy drinkign every night n then actually losing my mind a couple of times a week as a treat for moderating the rest of the time, clever huh?” yep...so how are you doing?

Starfish Actually things slowly turned around with my hubby, who used to drink vodka EVERY night. With what I was doing and little thoughts I would interject about example for our son, and I think with him seeing me actually motivated to DO things…he stopped the nonsense, too. You never know what will happen in the future, but for now you are doing great. Thanks for your response to my question about routine. That makes sense. It has to come from within…and as long as my reason to GET sober stay as my reasons to STAY sober – to save my health – set a better example – to live a truer life – and appreciate the gift that life really is – I will hopefully avoid going back to those haunting days of drunkenness. It sounds like you’re doing well out of town!!! Keep it up – we’re sending you strength.

[lolab]

Newbies Nest

Scottishlass I’m forever impressed by those that backslide and are able to turn it around quickly and continue to move forward. We all have seen that the majority of the time, that isn’t the case. I’ve seen too many, including myself – turn back to alcohol and then struggle for some time to return to MWO and shake that monkey off our back again. Great job!

Bluejay – missing you too.

Jane – on the way to 40 days How are you feeling? Any newbies who are anxious should go back and read some of your early posts. You were so candid about your feelings and your challenges – and it’s nice to read through and see how you have evolved in the past month….and you give real life solutions to working through cravings…and real life descriptions of how they feel…”laundry and phone calls” LOL!

I also related to your post about coping with the now clearly unsavory shit in my life. Yep, totally. Tough though, that the unsavory shit in my life is not easy to get rid of…that I used to wallow in that shit …but now I struggle with how to deal with it. Is avoidance the best option? I’m thinking aloud too…

Today – CONGRATULATIONS!!!!! Tiredness is a bit of a trigger for me…I hope you get your sleep straightened out soon…what a difference it makes. I love your method of thinking of new mommies… You ride on the natural high of your 30 day celebration to get through today…make sure you drink lots and don’t get hungry and try your best to leave those deadlines out of the bedroom when you try to sleep tonight…do you use any sleep or relaxation cd’s? I tend to worry in the night – about things that I can’t do a thing about…then end up too tired to do anything about them during the day!

Australia – I think I missed your celebration….congratulations!!!

K9 – wow, good thing you’re sober with a new addition in the house! What a great example you must be for him. I hope your class is going well today and love to hear about the relaxation stuff….do you have a favorite?

Bunk, what a wonderful post…I love what pinecone said about thinking back to you quietly using this place to build your success…we truly never know what a difference we can make in someone else’s life. And if by posting our feelings or advice or experiences here someone might gain some strength or identify with us, well, it really makes it worthwhile. There is no real cookie cutter approach that works for everybody – in my opinion. Just like everything in life – people handle things in such very different ways..


Oh Byrdie, you crack me up…”you must be a man, because no woman I know (myself included) could go 100 days lurking without adding her 2 cents!!!” haha, I just caught up to Jane’s post saying the same thing…

Welcome azurmyst, Lou, – I hope you’re still here.

Steadyhands, I am so glad that you still check in even after you returned to school. Your voice is an important one here. I agree – when I get that “pit” in my stomach from someone stressing me out is when I still want to run to alcohol. The difference now is that my brain is working well enough to stop me from doing it.

Hey unwasted yours is another invaluable voice….congratulations again. Love my iphone too!

Jolie, have you watched Smash? I have it DVR’d but haven’t had a chance to watch it at all….am starting to feel like I might be too far behind. I’m so totally happy for you to have finally broken free…

Mandy – congratulations on 6 months! I totally get what you said. I hate it when someone takes my words and twists them. Some people think they have all the answers and even if they are well intended, some may need some work on their approach.

Belgium, congratulations on your AF time! Those feelings of drinking become less and less over time. Yep it gets easier! Some days it’s not yet what I’d call “easy” but most days, I don’t even think about drinking.

Mrsg – today is 4 months for you and what a time you’ve had. But you’ve learned something about how strong you can be also. Sending you hugs.

[lolab]

Newbies Nest

Oh Shue – as despondent as you sounded, I do think sometimes “something” has to happen that makes us realize that we have no choice but to commit to being AF – and with that decision comes a great freedom. I do hope and believe that your hubby will come around. He will see that you are more “you” without alcohol…

Allybee – I hope you’re still here and AF – and not planning for a drinking weekend coming up. Keep posting and reading – it’s not easy but it is possible.

A guy – stick around – and don’t let that binge lead you back into the hell of drinking.

Thanks for sharing maddie – I hope you had success with the doctor – are you doing OK?

Timpin, again, thanks for checking in with us – we all need to see others who are succeeding!

Welcome Gingersnap – I remember those days – some of the days feeling proud and excited – but a bit scared because I specifically went out to stop at the liquor store – and talked myself into driving right past….so much wanting to turn around but somehow (at least sometimes) making it home without it…then getting inside and having some voice in my head try to talk me into going back out. Then if I made it through the night without it, I felt so happy…only to go through it all again the next day. I get the avoidance of others …all of it. I hope you keep posting and sharing - no doubt there are others who are reading your posts and identifying and gaining strength from all of us…print out Byrdie’s post…

Turnagain, thanks for the links…I plan to check those out very soon! Hat trick hee hee

Ruinator – you’re strong, and doing a great job…if I remember correctly, you’re young and around young partying people right??? Beautiful job!

Pinecone! How’s it going? I’ve missed everyone. Jane, what’s your plan for Vegas?

Ok…I feel much more connected now. Today is my day to recuperate and try to get things back to normal…

-lola

[lolab]

Newbies Nest

thanks Jane...

[lolab]

Newbies Nest

Thanks Jane

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Lola, you must be exhausted after that long post :H
Seriously though, welcome back

Today - CONGRATS on 30 AF days - awesome
I think we adults can get by on very little sleep, I know I have for years.....
I do worry about overall health & safety but I think we'll be OK.

Wow - the sun just popped out ~ nice for a change

[BelleGirl]

Newbies Nest

Good to see you back in form, Lola! Now go take a nap after those posts!

Today: CONGRATS on 30 days...Way To Go!!!:goodjob:

Shue, another thought in my head re: children is that I want to stop drinking before mine truly realize what is going on. My son is 11 and not that observant (typical male :H, no offense, guys), but I am sure my daughter at age 8, was starting to sense something. Especially when she saw me pouring water into a gin bottle and asked what I was doing...and of course I made up some story. It still hurts to think of that episode.

Jane, I don't know about weight gain...for some reason we don't have a scale in this house, but I do feel it "in my jeans". However, I do know that a box of Chocolate Glazed Krispy Kreme donuts has a shelf life of about 1 hr in my house. My daughter now hides a couple for herself before I can eat them all.

[Unwasted]

Newbies Nest

Belle, OMG I wish you hadn't said Krispy Kreme. I'm salivating! Oh well, off to eat some rice cakes with almond butter - somehow they're going to be sorely lacking now!:H

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Jane, I picked up about 4 pounds in the very beginning as I was eating everything that wasn't nailed down...but without any effort at all, over the months and now year, I dropped those and 9 more. Easy for me to say not to worry so much about it, but since you are doing so well now, maybe I can... Just don't eat so much. Bahahaha! I have ALL the answers today, and I not even a teen!! XXOO, Byrdie

[Steady Hands]

Newbies Nest

Hi Nesters

Jolie -" Love, love, loving my life at the moment." That is so powerful!

Today -:goodjob: 30 days!

Jane - Yes! I am with you on the weight gain! Started to loose a bit again, but for some or other reason I ate like mad (and the wrong stuff!!) this week.

Lolab - Thanks for your nice long posts again! I like sorted places and your posts is like sorting everything in the nest on a emotional level - does it make sense?

I am noticing something strange with the people close to me. Now that we have run through a few times of me saying no to alcohol it is like they are testing this new thing?Steady?Sober? Like they thought it was not going to last. My stepdad offered me some wine the other day. I said no thanks. Then he went through all the other alcohol he had in the house and offered it to me! (And he knows?) What about tea or coffee?
My sister is leaving for Europe tomorrow. I went to say good bye and she popped some champagne. She went to fetch glasses and I followed to switch on the kettle to make myself some coffee. She stood there for a while obviously waiting for me to tell her to get me a glass or not?

It?s good to be sober!

[Steady Hands]

Newbies Nest

Shue - I was up early, but was supposed to study... so I read MWO!
Good to know we are on the same time.
I have invited a friend with her young son over for the kids to play and we can chat. Hope to form a new, sober friendship. It is a good present to myself!

[lifechange]

Newbies Nest

oh my oh my oh my--
2 days away--not even--and this nest is BUZZIN'!
i love it.
Lola, i want to ditto a lot of what you said. i honestly don't know how you do it. i'm so glad you're back.
i want to welcome you Ginger and Maddie and send lots of strength your way.!!

[lifechange]

Newbies Nest

i'm happy to read about all of the vacation advice and pre-planning. it's definately a lot to think about and plan for. i have a wedding coming up in june in rome-- and i seriously thought about not going. but the people marrying are such close friends of ours--and i have the support of my bf who loves the sober me. what you said, TA, really helped. that at some point you finally realized that you just can't EVER have even a drop of al. that's me, too. for sure.

work has been a big trigger for me the past couple of years. somehow i got into the habbit of drinking there--beginning fairly early in the am--to deal with the stress. al is avail 24/7 and there's no way for me to control the availability.
last tues i hit a low-- started drinking while working and by 1pm was pretty much bombed. i don't know if some of my coworkers have noticed--would think so, but no one has ever mentioned anything. i could barely walk to the school to fetch the girls--constantly looking for some sort of a bench to have a little nap on. finally made it to the school and then home--and then continued!!--to try and hide the fact that i'd been drinking the whole day from my bf.
naturally, had to call in sick the next day and cried and cried and cried. i'm actually Never sick unless its from drinking--i'm surrounded by loving friends and family, i have a great job--i was ruining my life. all by myself, ruining a wonderful life.-!!
yesterday and today i had to work again and questioned whether or not i can really keep the job.but i got through it without al and with a strong plan. i'm hoping that with work it's also a matter of breaking the habit. now i have a few days off to strengthen my resolve.
and catch up with all you wonderful people.

[lifechange]

Newbies Nest

last thing.
tonight i was able to spend the evening, completely present with my little 7 yr old. we spent an hour and a half puzzling, read books before bed, talked about everything from here to the moon. each day i ask to be shown reasons i should stay sober. and each day i am shown so many.
i'm so grateful to be here--i read all of your posts--each word, actually, and slowly i'm connecting names with stories/personalities.
thank you all so much for sharing. it HELPS!!!!

[gingersnap]

Newbies Nest

I am going to make it thru Day 1 AF. I haven't felt well this afternoon and had no desire to drink. I must stop drinking to get my health in order. My BP is high right now and I take BP medicine. I have been having pain in my stomach, liver area....I have a condition called Barrett's esophagus a potential precancerous condition. I have to regain my health....I have so much to live for, so many things I want to do. I am very apprehensive at the moment not knowing how I am going to react to not drinking. I did get up this morning and juice, took veggies to work and drank tons of water. I've been reading posts and keep saying one day, one hour at a time. I know none of this will be easy....