Newbies Nest

[Willow23]

Newbies Nest

Hi all, I'm back. Again. Lol.

Ginger, Jolie is right. Don't beat yourself up. I've lost count of the amount of times I've fallen off the wagon. Today is the first day of Lent though! I'm gonna do it this time.

Day one.

[Steady Hands]

Newbies Nest

:waving::jumpwow::cheering::yougo:Congratulations Unwasted!!

[canadian gal]

Newbies Nest

Hi Nesters,

I'm having a bit of a hard time over here. Today is day 7 and feeling good. Hubby called while I was on my subway ride home to tell me that he is going out with his friend. My first thought was to get a few beers. I stopped outside of the store (which is on the 1st floor of my apartment) and stayed there for 10 seconds fighting with myself. I didn't go in. I am at home now but the cravings are still here. It's like I can taste it in my mouth. I was fine until hubby said he wont be home. Again, it's like who would know if I had a few? The store is so close...I can even get them to deliver. How can I make it through the rest of the night?

[canadian gal]

Newbies Nest

ps. Congrats UW on your 100 days!

Jane- sorry about LV. Forget about the $800. Go do some shopping, walking, eating, etc. If you don't want to leave the room order in some delicious room service. An ice cream sunday sounds good right about now, don't you think?

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Good morning Nesters,

CONGRATS Unwasted!
100 AF days - awesome

Welcome back Willow!
What's your plan?

Greetings SH, sunshine & everyone!

CG, go to the Tool box & read until you find some ideas to keep yourself occupied!
You know being alone has been a big trigger in the past - do anything, just don't drink. This is where the MWO Hypno CDs really come in handy

Off to get my day started. Wishing everyone a wonderful AF Wednesday!
Lav

[canadian gal]

Newbies Nest

Alright, I did go to the store....BUT, I bought chocolate and juice. It may not be the healthiest, but here I sit still sober. I also ate an apple and a banana. I will remember this for next time...just eat!

It was hard for me cause 1) hubby wasn't home 2) all the chores and everything are done 3) I got home from work early and don't have to start until late tomorrow. 4) I was hungry.

Lessons learned.

[Mandy64]

Newbies Nest

Good morning everyone - thanks for the good thoughts on this site. Feeling a lot better about 'speaking' up. The newbies nest is my morning reading - on cup of coffee number 2 and counting. There have been several posts on Topomax. Never tried that but did start Antabuse last summer. There was a dramatic and immediate shift in my mind set toward drinking - it just took the option of drinking off the table. I did (and do) think about drinking but no longer have that internal fight about alcohol. It is so much less exhausting.

Coming up on a long weekend trip with my family. I am six months AF and am really glad I am not planning and plotting how I am going to drink my way through the trip = in the past I would buy sprite in bottles pour it out and fill with wine, put AL in lining of suitcase, crazy stuff. If helps to think about that and acknowledge how far I've come - thanks for letting me get this out. I need to go into this weekend fortified because I never know when that nasty combination of temptation/opportunity/low self esteem will come into play. As I type I think I've hit on something - my self esteem has taken a real beating. Due to this and who knows what else, I get apprehensive going into anything outside my normal routine since getting AF. I have done other things since getting AF...gone on a ski trip with friends, visited my family, gone out to dinner several times, even out for New Years but each time if someone had given me the choice of crawling into bed with a book I swear I would choose that. Even though all of the times I've pushed myself to join life 'live' sober I've been fine, I still get apprehensive. Good to get this out there.

Thank you and the best to you all

[lolab]

Newbies Nest

Good morning everyone. CG it's so funny how the obvious things can just not occur to us sometimes...the hunger thing? Sometimes it gets me still! GREAT job.

UW Now I'll let go of my restraint - yea!!!!!!!!!!!! Congratulations to you!

Jane, I hope you did ok last night....the first thing that occurs to me is to ask you to not feel like its a "given" that these cravings have nowhere to go but to get worse. Sometimes when we feel really bad, it just seems that giving into drinking is inevitable...we're working in that direction, so it's gonna happen eventually...but that is SO not the case. The truth is, when you bounce back from one of these lows, and you will....you will have learned some major stuff...and you will have gained some immense strength!

Second, do you have enough food - snacks and things - na drinks that you like? I would guess that might be a challenge when traveling. Can you get to a store like the others said, and buy some of that?

I am going to leave you with some words from a wise person... "I had a close friend come thisclose to dieing from acute liver failure. She had only been drinking heavily for 12 years. It was the worst thing I have ever seen, so I know now that all the scary stories we hear are true. This, and (despite the fact that I cling to drinking and LOVE getting buzzed/drunk) the fact that the drinking and the addiction make me feel so bad, and sick...every..single..day, is what makes me want to quit. The part that's in parentheses is what confudes the hell out of me. Good luck to you, and to us. One day at a time, right? One hour at a time also good"

and "Us newbies, we are all just learning and like so many other things, sometimes you have to take a step or 2 backwards before you can resume the journey forwards. I love that expression 'the only way out is through'. "


sending you hugs and I"ll be thinking of you today.....

[lolab]

Newbies Nest

Hi Mandy - Congrats on your 6 months !you sound so much like me - I'm about 5 months AF....so many of us here have hidden stuff....I could take my water bottle with vodka everywhere...but it sucked when my thirsty son asked me for a sip and I'd have to claim that I thought I was coming down with someone so he wouldn't want my germs...AND I also come to lots of self discovery while typing things out here! that's why some of my posts are so dang long.....
:H
do you still take Antabuse? I think apprehension still - is normal...if it's not, then I guess we can be abnormal together... Have a great weekend with your family!

Lola

[BlondeAFAmbition]

Newbies Nest

Hi Nesters,

I haven't been here in a while but wanted to say hello. I was doing really well until the holidays hit and am now back to day 1. I see some new faces as well as the "Nest" mums. Hope you are all well. I am about to jump back into the monthly abstinence thread where you will see me most often, but I'll check in here too as I always find the Newbies Nest such a supportive place to be. Off to the toolbox I go so I can confirm my first day plan. I didn't drink that much last night, just 2 glasses of wine and then poured the rest down the sink. Even 2 glasses of wine left me with a bad night of sleeping. I'm looking forward to the sound sleep that sobriety can give you, I miss that the most. So this morning, I am hopeful. I have lots of herbal tea and seltzer stocked up, a new gym membership (2 weeks into that and loving it) and some great reads waiting for me tonight when I turn in. Also, I know not to let myself get too hungry so I will plan on an early dinner and since the sun is out and mild today, I long walk with doggie will make it on today's agenda as well! Wish me luck!

[Unwasted]

Newbies Nest

Good morning Nesters - thanks for the well-wishes for my 100th day. Just want to say to you all that I've never been happier. I wish I had done this a long time ago. Thanks for your support.......couldn't have done it without all of you. For those of you just starting out, keep it going. I promise life is better this way.........we're not missing out on anything when we don't drink. If you can get some big chunks of AF time, you'll feel so great that you won't want to compromise it. Best to you all! :lilheart:

[BlondeAFAmbition]

Newbies Nest

Fantastic for you Unwasted! You are an inspiration! Well done on 100 days!!!

[BelleGirl]

Newbies Nest

Just wanted to pop in to sayCONGRATS ON 100 DAYS UNWASTED!!!

And...CG...way to go on staying away from the AL. You had a rough patch, but made it through and learned something from it. That is an important part of the process!

BlondeAF...glad to see you back. Please grab on to the nest and stay for a while.

Gosh...I just realized that I am on day 40! Not one of those big anniversaries, but I can't believe it came so fast. I am just loving this AF life! It is not that all is perfect, but I feel like I can deal with everything that comes my way.

Love to all in the nest.

Time to throw a chicken (sorry Lav's friends) into the crockpot and get this day going...

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

UNWASTED!!! Look at YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am about to pop with pride. THIS is what it's all about! Today is your day! Well done!
Mandy...you wouldn't believe this, but I was thinking about this very topic yesterday during a long drive I had. When I was in the first 6 months of sobriety...I still didn't want to venture out....sure I went where I had to, but I still wasn't self assured enough to even try something new. Now at a year...gosh 13 months...I am the most self aware and sure in my life.....I mean ever! I know who I am (at long last) and I am comfortable with it! I am finally happy with me. This has been a very long journey of self discovery...(sounds corny) but I will tell you with unbridled enthusiasm...it has been worth it. Happiness IS what it's cracked up to be....and it's not found in the bottom of a dam bottle. I'm so glad you posted....stick with us, kiddo....we won't steer you wrong!
MindPeace. Byrdie

[Willow23]

Newbies Nest

Belle girl, you're where I want to be. At the minute I can't imagine getting to day 4. It's gonna be hard, I just want to get through this first week.