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    Newbies Nest

    right the 2 of us need to buck up
    so easy to take the miserble path, sure hell we're so used to it (plus I'm irish and we're sorta drawn to the dramatic misery), but we weren't always like that (pre-addiction) and we don't have to be either.

    I'm gona try and stop myself everytime I start thinking negative tonight, I'm not gona feed this habit. I'm gona be as nice to myself
    "When you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it"

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      Newbies Nest

      Am trying to pull myself together. Wish I could get in to the mindset I had 10+ yrs ago when I never even thought about drinking each evening. Presumably the longer I abstain, the easier it will be to reach this mindset where I don't want alcohol?

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        Newbies Nest

        Its like finding yourself again, that person is still in there, but just got a bit of a battering from drink, same for me

        The longer we are away from it the closer we are to finding our good selves again, the yuck won't last forever and christ if you're like me you've experienced worse yucks then this in your drinking career, the addiction is still playing games with our heads
        "When you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it"

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          Newbies Nest

          Thank you for thinking of me jane27 and thank you for the encouragement unwasted! I would love to fast forward a couple of months too! I know I will feel so much happier inside!

          Sausage and sugarbeat...think about that too One month from now with no alcohol?! Oh my goodness. My medication (antidepressants) would actually be able to work. I could breathe life in and wake up in the morning and get things accomplished. I could actually feel confident instead of so sad and shameful! Right now I am just so full of guilt for who I have become. I want to change my life for the better!!!

          I know so many people so close to me who have 15 years under their belt...if they can do it, why can't I? Why can't any of us? It is possible!!!!!:h
          "One day at a time. Messy bed, Messy head."
          March 13, 2012

          Goal #1: 7 days 3/19/12 DONE
          Goal #2: 15 days 3/27/12
          Goal #3: 30 days 4/11/12
          Goal #4: 60 days 5/11/12
          Goal #5: 90 days 6/10/12
          Goal #6: 6 months
          Goal #7: 1 year

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            Newbies Nest

            What scares me Hope and Sugar - is last time I caved and had a drink (July 2009) and that was after 250+ days AF, it took me nearly 3 yrs before I could find the strength / motivation to seriously quit again - and that was 8 days ago. If I give in now it could be another 3 yrs before I'm back!

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              Newbies Nest

              face it with me sausage, we have to go down alittle to go way back up


              I could list a million great things about myself but with drink, all those things are squeeshed down and I just exist, been like that for 3 years, (bits of sobriety longest 7mths) I don't want that, I want to live I want to heal my relationship with myself. I want to live the life I want and enjoy myself. I have enough regrets, I'll deal with them and move on. Boy do I know it hurts, hurts like hell but give yourself a chance to have a good life

              We need to stop being so self destructive and give ourself the same chance we would give others
              "When you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it"

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                Newbies Nest

                Hi Guys
                I also take AD my dose was getting higher and higher and was also on beta blockers, since i stopped drinking on 7th Jan 12 I have managed to stop the beta blockers completely and halved the dose on the AD the difference is amazing I love it and you will to. Someone once said to me "give it time, the magic will happen" I couldn't understand what they meant I was impatient and kept going back to the dreaded AL, I now understand!!
                Strange thing though is now a little voice keeps knocking on my brain saying maybe you could have a wee drink for special occasions, I am dealing with that voice now.

                good luck all and stay strong xx
                Stella

                Back to the beginning day 02 Jan 2013

                Grateful for MWO :thanks:

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                  Newbies Nest

                  PS Sausage you're really helping me
                  "When you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it"

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                    Newbies Nest

                    Great and Stella -- I had that one little drink at a special occasion ( an 18th birthday party) in July 2009 and as I said a couple of posts back - 3 YEARS later I've only just got the strength to come back!!!

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                      Newbies Nest

                      As one wise man said to me 'Don't leave before the miracles start happening'
                      "When you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it"

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                        Newbies Nest

                        Sausage...i will be keeping that in mind as I fight th bloody monster, thank you for valuable information
                        Sugarebeat....that is so true, weird how it feels so good to be sober yet the doubt still creeps in wonder when it will stop!!!
                        Stella

                        Back to the beginning day 02 Jan 2013

                        Grateful for MWO :thanks:

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                          Newbies Nest

                          Stella - have just read your last post again about both your meds. That is amazing! Surely that speaks volumes to everyone. You can really see the benefits of quitting! That has really motivated me just now.

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                            Newbies Nest

                            its the mind taking over, negative self talk, my thinking habits are nuts fro the addiction anyhow and that's what I'm actively trying to change. I'm trying some 'The Power of Now' technics like acknowledging your thoughts as they come in, as a third party almost, becoming more aware and mindful of how negetive they are and that they are only thoughts (same with cravings) and I can change them, going to a deeper place

                            I'm sober, I've hurt no-one today, its all on the up
                            "When you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it"

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                              Newbies Nest

                              It's true sugarbeat - we are not our thoughts

                              I highly suggest you guys dive into the Tool box - I spent a lot of Friday nights there when I first started, very helpful!
                              AF since 03/26/09
                              NF since 05/19/09
                              Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

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                                Newbies Nest

                                Stella, since I've been AF I'm off 3 Blood Pressure meds and Cymbalta. I've never felt better. Get off AD if you can, they are fogging you up and I found the world to be in color instead of black and white. I was depressed because I was drinking myself to death. Getting off AL the best AD of all! Try weaning off...you can always go back on them, but until you are operating on your own power you won't know. Just my cent worth today. Getting off Cymbalta was awful...BTW. Don't go cold turkey! I ended up in the ER. If you google the withdrawals of the AD you are taking, it is amazing to see the hell people are going thru getting off them. Dr's prescribe them like candy! They are no joke when you try to quit. B
                                All you gotta do, is get thru this day. AF 1/20/2011
                                Tool Box
                                Newbie's Nest

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