Newbies Nest

[Nursie]

Newbies Nest

Good Morning Nest!

So nice to see so many people posting in the nest. Makes me feel all feathery and fluffy lol.

Jane and Willow, we started this on the same day and though we may have walked off the path for a second, we are still on it, and it still leads to sobriety.

Lav, I use logic every day, and I'm quite good at it. I took alcohol off the table and I changed my mind.
I knew I took alcohol off the table, I knew I had a plan, I know where it takes me, I know I'm happier and more successful sober, I know the guilt subsides and the new sober life becomes normal.

LOGIC is not what is helping me stay sober. There is no logic as to why people choose to waste their lives and live in suffering all because of alcohol. There is no logic that my brother continues to drink like a barbarian because he (we) had a bad childhood and our mother was and still is in the final stages of alcOholism and drug addiction. He Logically sees that, I logically see that. My mother, after 20 years of treatment, rehabs, psych wards, rapes, overdoses, arrests, suicide attempts, electric shock treatments, and beatings, and losing her children...even she sees the LOGIC.

If it were as simple as logic, nobody would be here. They would go to rehab and the therapist would say "OK, alcohol is OFF the table for you." pay the bill and leave.

I'm sorry to harp on this, and I mean no offense to anyone, but this just hit a nerve a little.

Hope everyone is having a great day. Perfect day to get some pansies and hens and chicks planted over here.

[piper123]

Newbies Nest

I too keep failing and just unable to get even one day. I went on a run this morning and I am going to stay close to the nest to get this done. I've been reading everyone's posts and printing out the many very good posts that I hope will work for me. One was the post about Jason Vale's book about being in prison and wanted desperately to get out and actually having the key to let myself out. I have tried to find the book locally but I have to order it. If anything else from the book worked for someone, please let me know. I have read the Alan Carr book and I'm reading it again.

Part of me wishes I connected better with some here. I just feel like I am on the outside looking in. I know that will come with the hard work of joining in and never drinking again. And for me it will be completely taking it off the table.

So for today I am going to go with the wash, rinse, repeat scenario because I feel like that is on of my biggest hurdles in getting started. Sunday comes, I know that it is time to try yet I give in at night, Monday rolls around and I have a favorite show on tv that night that I match with drinking, and since I caved Sunday, may as well cave Monday, then Tuesday is the same as Monday, so by Wednesday when I don't really have anything I pair up with drinking, I think well, your in the middle of the week, finish it out and try on Friday since I sleep so badly and I don't have to work again until Monday.:stop: as in REALLY? It looks so bad even typing it here!!!

My doctor even gave me medicine to help me with my sleep AND a plan! I am trying to run again and around here a lot of running groups have teamed up with bars where everyone goes on a run, then after you can leave or join a social in the bar to eat, drink, etc. Do you know one group has a t-shirt that says "I run for wine"

Anyway, I am not tempted to drink in bars at all. I don't like beer, and why drink a glass of wine that costs the same as an entire bottle of the crap I drink? I am mainly doing this to be around other people and out of my isolation. And when I do drink, I am one of those who actually gag the smell is so awful until I push through where I don't notice it.

So my doc said go on your run, then immediately after, take one pill, the med is gabapentin, it will make you sleepy but take it as soon as you get in the door. Then, take one before you go to sleep.

I am not even giving this a chance. So today I am. I am going out to eat with some friends at 6. I'll come home and do this plan and do it again tomorrow night. I'll have two nights. Then do it again and just try to make it to Wednesday where I KNOW i'll be on the other side of the awful anxiety, depression, guilty feelings that I am experiencing now and I can focus on gratitude rather than deprivation.

Also, I don't know if you all remember my mentioning my left leg pain, tingling, numbness. And I am too afraid to go to the dr. about it because it is probably related to my drinking and I'll have to fess up and I am to embarrassed about it. I need to stop drinking to see if it is causing me problems with my sciatic nerve.

But until I take Alcohol OFF the table, I am stuck in this awful mess. I'm going to an AA meeting at 2. I really go to listen to the speaker and get motivated and not feel so alone. But after reading Alan Carr's take on AA it makes me a little wary of the program.

If you've gotten to the end of this post, thank you and sorry it's so long. I feel like I need to put all my cards on the table so you guy's know I am serious, I am doing the homework, but am really really struggling and need help.

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Sometimes I got a chance to watch Oprah. I'm not a card-carrying fan, but I think she does do a lot of good works. On a few of the shows I watched, she'd ask her guests, 'What do you know for sure?' I thought this was an excellent question...and different stars answered in their own ways...but I gave this serious thought..and continue to do so. But here is one thing I do know for sure: People will do what they want to do. Now doesn't that sound simple? It really is quite complex tho....We are people of free will. The want and desire to do something trumps everything...sometimes even skill and ability! If you want to not drink more than you want to, then you won't drink. If you want to drink more than you don't then you'll do that. It wasn't until that unbalance hit me, that I was able to do it. I wanted to stop more than anything else.
While I am on my soap box...on the subject of counting days....When I wasn't able to string many together, I didn't think it was such a big deal. Now that I have, I do think it is. Counting sober time is what we do as we embark on this journey...just as runners count miles and dieters count pounds. My days matter to me, and every addict I've known or read about, knows his/her exact start date. You can't manage what you can't measure, and keeping time is how I do it.
Just my thoughts...Byrdie

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

piper, I sincerely hope your plan work for you! Sounds good, please give it a chance.

I urge everyone to consider reading a book called 'Radical Forgiveness' by Colin Tipping.
I have my copy on my Kindle & refer to it often. This concept has helped me to overcome some major bullshit in my life & move on to a better way of living
Here is some info from the website:

1: Radical Forgiveness

Weening yourself away from victimhood is really the first step in developing a Radical Living consciousness. You cannot be in a peaceful state if you are holding resentment and anger about things that have happened in the past or continue to rob you of your peace even now. It is incredibly disempowering to make others responsible for your lack of happiness.

The answer, of course, is forgiveness. But don’t worry. We have a way to do it that is not at all difficult. It’s not like conventional forgiveness which is hard to do and rarely works. Radical Forgiveness is a simple step-by-step process that is fast, easy and extremely effective. It provides tools that enable you to quickly release whatever energies you are holding onto.

If you are like most people, in order to achieve the kind of peace that Radical Living implies, you’ll probably need to forgive one or more of the following: your parents, your partner(s), your kids, your siblings, your boss, your co-workers, not to mention doctors, lawyers, the government and other institutions. No matter whether the issues you have with these folks are small or large, it still necessary to do the work on each one to clear that energy out of your body and raise your vibration. The tools you need are provided and many of them are free. (see below.) But some of them are very specific and targeted towards particular people such parents or partners.

The longer term benefits of are improved health, more energy, expanded relationships, more prosperity, greater happiness, more peace in your life, and so on.

This concept is really rather simple but helped me to release a lot of personal pain, quickly & effectively.
I hope everyone takes a minute to at least look at the website:
www.radicalforgiveness.com

[BelleGirl]

Newbies Nest

lolab;1285786 wrote:
Belle, I?m really happy to see your post, too. And seeing you sound so strong. Just remember after that party today ? once you make it to the end of it, what?s the point of drinking then? You?ve already got the perfect stage for relaxing?.everyone?s gone, everyone?s tired ? just put your feet up or hop in the tub and feel relief that the party?s over and you?re going to feel great tomorrow.

Lola...I only have a minute here before chasing the kids to bath and bed...but just had to give you a big shout out of thanks. I kept running your words through my head to day "what's the point of drinking then?" regarding making it through my daughter's party. Those words made all the difference. I remember that in such situations, I used to think..."gawd, when this is over I am going to drink my @$$ off."

I'm so happy to say that I made it through without coming home to drink. No point in it!!! :thanks:

[LibraryGirl]

Newbies Nest

Hello (N)Bestiesssssssssss!! Sunday evening here, and I've been reading through this last page with interest and compassion.

Piper, I want to help if I can, and I believe you can help me as well, as does everyone here. Your strong desire to change is so evident, and I just believe you will be successful.:l

I can't remember everyone's post, but I know I enjoyed reading ALL of it, and I don't know if it's my addicted brain, but I'm so addicted to MWO.:H At least I don't wake up feeling ashamed in the mornings!

[scottish lass]

Newbies Nest

Signing back into the nest, been struggling a bit and stopping and starting - feels a bit different this time, and I have 7 days (or will have in a few more hours). Looking back I have done so very much better than March 2011, still not quite there yet, but keep on getting closer.
Hi to old and new friends.....Happy Sober Sunday

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Popping back in to wish everyone a safe night in the Nest

scottish lass, glad you are back in the nest! Make yourself comfortable & keep up the great work - 7 AF days is awesome

[lolab]

Newbies Nest

hello to scottishlass...nice to see you...and Belle, thanks for letting me know - that is a big deal to me...I'm so glad that you're doing well.

Hey piper, "Part of me wishes I connected better with some here. I just feel like I am on the outside looking in" I don't think anyone else sees it that way at all...I am always really glad to see a post from you and to know that you're ok and still trying. You will see, once that damn al voice quits trying to drag you down...

[mby82266]

Newbies Nest

Why is it so easy at 3am to say I am not going to drink today but at 5pm I loose all my resolve and drink anyway. I am wide awake drinking water trying to flush my system from over indulging yet again, today my goal is to make until 6pm without a drink.

[Pocket]

Newbies Nest

I'm up way early. Day 8. I have, again, a lot of work related anxiety and I couldn't sleep at all. I kind of want to fast-forward through the next few days... anyone have a time machine I can borrow?

Hey Scottish Lass, good to see you!

Lav, CONGRATS on 3 years!!!! That's incredible! And thanks for all the support you give us newbies.

mby-- Sometimes it is a good idea to start with small goals. But that voice at 3 am begs to be listened to. Maybe next time you wake up feeling like that you could write a letter to yourself about how you are feeling and why... then read it around 5 pm. Just a thought! Good luck!

Good morning to everyone else in the nest! I hope you all have wonderful days!

[Willow23]

Newbies Nest

Day 8 for me too Pocket! Yay, go us! Lol.

Lav - 3 years is incredible! Well done and thanks from me too for holding us all together.

Have a good day everyone! X

[windy]

Newbies Nest

Hey Nesters,

Piper and Lola -- I think a lot of people feel like they are the outsider. I know I DO. I find it interesting how many of us feel that way. I have always felt that way and it took a lot for me to actually make that first post here, but I knew I had to do it in order to get sober for good. And I suppose that's what keeps me coming back to.

Lav -- I have to tell you -- I probably would not have posted on this thread if you would not have invited me to do so. I truly think the reason I was successful thus far is because I posted on this thread on a daily basis. You have changed my life in that simple, small gesture and I will forever be grateful. Everyone else here is making a big difference too. So no matter how you feel Nesters, keep posting -- it is only GOOD. You never know who you are going to impress.

Piper -- I am rooting for you big time and I see your determination. Keep coming back here. I really enjoy reading what you have to say and have been following your story and hope you find success.

[SAUSAGE]

Newbies Nest

Hello everyone and firstly a huge congratulations to Lav on 3 years. Such a fantastic milestone, so pleased for you and thank you for all your help and support. You deserve this success. What are you doing to celebrate?

Pocket and Willow, 8 days is great, you are into the 2nd week now, keep going.

Windy - good to see you on here, and thanks for posting on my Counting AF days thread. Another good thread to join which I have been posting on daily since I quit in Feb is the AF Daily, you will get lots of support on there too.

Well must go, lots to do, beautiful very mild sunny day here.

Hi to everyone else

Sausage x
Day 32

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Good morning Nesters!

Yes, I am one happy granny today :H
Waking up everyday for the past three years without a hangover is truly special. I encourage all of you to give it a try

Hello & welcome to mby!
Challenge yourself to go 24 hours without AL & feel the pride yourself, it's a wonderful thing.

Wishing everyone a wonderful AF Monday in the nest.
Lav