Newbies Nest

[lifechange]

Newbies Nest

time is rnning away from me!
wanted to catch up yesterday and couldn't, so now it will have to wait until tonight.
just a quick hello to keep myself accountable the morning of day 3.
yeahh!!

[Willow23]

Newbies Nest

Hurrah Scottishlass - day 11 for us!

Off out with DS, a friend and her DD to the local farm. I haven't been for ages and I'm really excited! Couldn't do it with a hangover, I would waste this beautiful day and have wasted money. Couldn't afford a trip to the farm if I was still drinking.

Hello to everyone - have a great day. Back later x

[lolab]

Newbies Nest

Nike, I also love hearing from people who have been just reading and learning and gaining strength. Awesome job on your ? now 46 ? days!!!!!

Nursie ? you sound strong - :l


Byrdie, your surfer analogy was perfect. The journey to sobriety is exactly like that! ?It reminds me of when I see surfers out in the ocean...as they try and get past the breakers they keep falling off and getting hit...over and over they try, until one time they get past them and then they are able to get out into the calm...riding over the little swells.? Those initial waves have the ability to slam us right back to where we started- and there are definitely more than one of them! But once you persist and get past the first really tough ones, the waves you meet are so much smaller ? they?re still there and we can?t just forget we?re surfing ? or we will fall off ? but for the most part we?re gliding along on top of the water. I don?t surf and I don?t live near the ocean, but I?m also kind of thinking of waterskiing?.:-) It?s hard to get up at first, and takes some effort, and sometimes, you fall flat on your face?but once you?re up, you can glide along in the middle, and once you gain some confidence you can cross over the wake and get where it?s really good ?

Lav, I do need to keep hearing that ? that there?s nothing to fear about who I ?am?. I know it?s not who I was?and I?m pretty sure it?s not who I ?am? most of the time right now?.I?m still working through some things ? but I do know I?m heading in the right direction ? and I still do have some of that fear. God, I love tulips?

Pinecone, me neither. If an event had no alcohol, I seriously thought ?what?s the point??.even a kids? birthday party?.I?m curious to see how this all works out as I?m still in the category of not really socializing much?..Actually, I wonder if I?ve done this to myself,- that maybe I don?t get invited to things much anymore since I would find an excuse not to go if there wasn?t alcohol. And sad that the very people I am now avoiding ? those who find a reason to have alcohol ALL the time ? are the ones that I sought out and surrounded myself with before?.

Windy, you?re doing it again ? you?re the strong one. You come out and state your goals ? you renewed your commitment for one year. :goodjob:


Honey ? I hope you?re doing ok. Listen to Lav.

Your story is familiar to lots here?..I made sure things were taken care of while drinking all the time?.but I?m finding out as I get more and more AF time under my belt?that it was all ?surfacey? stuff. I had gotten really skilled at doing the very least that I had to do. It?s such a huge change to actually ?care? about things and take care of your family and help them out with things because you want to and because that?s the kind of person you want to be ? rather than just doing it because you feel like you have to ? and trying to get it all out of the way as early and fast as you can, so you don?t have to worry about not being able to because you?ve had too much to drink.

K9 - don't you sometimes think how lucky we are to have not met each other two years ago? God if I had found someone who initiated drinking every time I THOUGHT of drinking - I never would have said no...We all did a good enough job driving straight into hell by ourselves.

Kaizen ? good luck with the antabuse. Many have found great success with it - including K9.

Willow ? It?s so true. When I first watched it, I wasn?t at that point ? but like K9 said ? if you fast forward, it?s exactly where both of us ended up. Thank goodness you're stopping before that point. So you?re in double digits?!?! :goodjob:

Daisy ? how?s it going? Stay close while you get past this first big hurdle, OK?:l

Lifechange, day 3! Way to hang tough through the beginning!

Blondie you?re making it look effortless ? enjoy your days off!

Scottishlass, it seems like you?re back on the horse - 11 is a great number. :-)
So where is Jane, and finallydone, and steadyhands?

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Well good morning Nesters

Lola, good point about the 'surfacey stuff' while drinking. I had convinced myself that no one really cared or noticed anyway so why expend time & energy on the house, on myself, the garden, etc.
I am grateful to be back to the original & true me & I'm staying this way

lifechange, do well on Day 3!!!

Greetings to everyone & wishes for a fantastic AF Thursday!!!
Lav

[daisy45]

Newbies Nest

lolab;1287960 wrote:
If an event had no alcohol, I seriously thought ?what?s the point??.even a kids? birthday party?.I?m curious to see how this all works out as I?m still in the category of not really socializing much?..Actually, I wonder if I?ve done this to myself,- that maybe I don?t get invited to things much anymore since I would find an excuse not to go if there wasn?t alcohol. And sad that the very people I am now avoiding ? those who find a reason to have alcohol ALL the time ? are the ones that I sought out and surrounded myself with before?.

Lolab, I have put it out that I don't drink any more as I find as soon as anyone hears I've had a night of boozing they are back in their numbers. If I do slip back to my old ways I try to keep it quiet so that I can avoid getting involved again. I have met numerous 'good friends' who ask if I am 'drinking or not' and when I say 'yes' the response is 'we'll have to have a wee night'. I have told people that I can and will go out for a night AF and enjoy it but rarely get asked unless they think I'm going to join in the boozing. I actually think this says more about them than me. When I was drinking heavily (before MWO) I probably would have done the same.
My relationships with so many of my friends revolved around a night of wining and dining. As part of my plan, I find that lying, even if I have drank, stops friends and family calling for their old drinking buddy - if they want me they have to accept me sober because that is how my future is going to be.
Sorry for being a bit long-winded; Back on track at day 2 and rather than beating myself up, I am looking on the 19 days AF I had before I drank and the sooner I get back the less hardship I have to go through - onwards and upwards!!!!

[Honeysoup]

Newbies Nest

Well....I DID IT! I am SO happy with myself. I know I have a long road ahead of me but Day 1 down and on to fight for Day 2! I just kept myself really busy and broke my routine. It worked, I went home and went for a walk with my DH and DD...that didn't work out too well...too many bugs! But, we tried Anyway, by the time I got things done it was 8:30 and I was exhausted. It's amazing how tired I got compared to drinking my night away and going to bed late. Who new? Ha! Anyway, everytime I thought of AL I just thought of you guys. You really helped me through this and after I'm done being a little selfish, and getting through at least the next 2 days. I can't wait to help others. I love all of you and I love me too!

Goal today: Stay sober and be positive. I am going to try not to have any negativity and everytime I do I am going to force myself to say or think something positive.

Anyway....THANK YOU!!!!

[windy]

Newbies Nest

I am literally heading out the door, but saw this post. YEAH!! TO HONEYSOUP. . . . . .Keep up the good attitude -- it is everything!

And sooner or later, I would love to know the reason for your lovely name. ....

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

WooooHoooo for you Honey!! I am so proud of you! It's all a mind game and you must get control of your thoughts! So happy to see this post! If you got thru yesterday...you can get thru today. Onward and upward! B

[SAUSAGE]

Newbies Nest

Hi Honeysoup

Just seen your post. A huge congratulations to you on your day 1, now keep busy again today and before you know it you will be on Day 3 ( having got through day 2) as the days add up like a string of pearls, this will help make you stronger because you won't want to get bak to day 1. Plus you'll adjust to your new routine.

Lifechange, fantastic that you are on day 3, and huge congrats to Willow and Scottish lass now they are into double figures on day 11.

Hi to everyone else.

On the subject of telling people you have a quit - I did this last time , once i'd got a couple of AF months under my belt, and it actually made things harder for me because no-one thought I had a problem ( I mostly drank alone at home so why would they know) so they were all putting pressure on me to drink or at least moderate whereas if I didn't say anything it wasn't discussed. Then when I did start drinking again after 8 months I felt really stupid and embarassed. I'm not saying anthing this time. Only my mum ( who though I drank too much and so is pleased I quit) and Mr Sausage know. I don't go out that much socially anyway and the first few time I do I'll just say I'm driving or on medication, if anybody asks.

See you all later

Sausage x
Day 35

[daisy45]

Newbies Nest

Sausage, I know different things work for each of us. In my situation, I had so many people calling to my house that I feel I have no option. If I put it out right now that I am drinking again, even if only for one night, I know I will have visitors Friday, Saturday and possibly all day Sunday with their party packs with them. That would be inviting temptation and it is something I don't need right now. This is easier and as it is my intention to stay this way - acting until I become it, so to say! I let the odd person know but don't want that free-for-all back into my life.

[Honeysoup]

Newbies Nest

Thank you all for the congrats...

To Sausage and Daisy - I have a few I tell and a few I won't until I'm ready...I haven't told my husband I am trying...I don't want the judgement if I fail. I just want to do this for myself. I also usually drank alone because my husband don't drink and he was usually working either 2nd or 3rd shift. Which was bad b/c he will never realize HOW MUCH I actually did drink and so I could drink want I wanted to. Anyway...not worrying about him today

Windy - As far as how I got my name...I made it up when I was drunk and searching on another site...As I drank I would search for answers on how to quit...I guess I have a split personality...GOOD VS. EVIL...lol...I just thought it sounded yummy like my wine but savory like my heart...

I will keep checking in...mmuuuaaahhh have a fabulous day!

[LibraryGirl]

Newbies Nest

Yay!!! Great job on day ONE, Honey!:goodjob: You have a great attitude, and I believe it will help you immensely! ODAAT (one day at a time). Before you know it, a month will have passed! I still cannot believe I've been AF 36 days. I drank rum every day for the past 10+ years.

Life is GOOD!!!:l

[K9Lover]

Newbies Nest

Well that was a first for me...I had a long post written and bumped the keyboard with my coffee cup and it completely vanished....aarggh.

Honey, great job on getting through the day, we are all proud of you! The next couple of days will be the hardest, so be prepared for them and stay strong, it will get easier after that, I promise!

As I was saying before my post got rudely deleted, I was in CVS last night and made it in and out without even glancing at the beer/alcohol aisle. Even after all this time I still feel compelled to "look". I was buying vitamins that my good friend who is a personal trainer told me to get. I get overwhelmed with the shelves of vitamins, so he gave me list of what I need, and it's pretty short. I think sometimes we tend to overdo it (I do anyway). My daughter also forced me out without allowing me to look at the makeup aisle because I am a hoarder and always buy things I already have. LOL

I'm looking forward to my weekend alone. It's supposed to rain so I need to go to the Library and get a couple of books and probably get some movies too. I'm going to look for the two we've been mentioning here lately. My daughter will be at her dad's for the next 5 days (Spring Break) and normally I'd be in a drunken stupor that whole time. I do NOT miss those days. I'm happy to report tomorrow will be day 95 for me, and I am going to my doctor for a follow up, so I won't have to hang my head in shame and say I messed up!

I hope you all have a great day and keep up the positive attitudes!

K9

[SAUSAGE]

Newbies Nest

Hi again

A lot of people wonder where my screen name Sausage comes from! Well, Sausage was actually my daughter's nickname from when she was very small. The midwife started it when she was about 36 hrs old and it sort of stuck. She still gets called it sometimes now. When I first joined MWO nearly 4 yrs ago now, I was looking for a screen name and this came to mind very easily. Also I appeared to be the only Sausage on here so it was good that I didn't have to be Sausage 943 or something, which was another reason why I chose it!

Back later

Sausage x
Day 35

[Willow23]

Newbies Nest

Hey guys. Well, I must admit this is the most I've struggled in the past 11 days! It's hot and sunny which makes me want to go get wine. I got my book and read the chapter on passive drinking and the effect it has on children, so that's dulled it down a bit. I'll be ok, it's just a sneaky bugger creeping up on me like that!

I just realised something really stupid that never occurred to me before. I drink very little caffeine and when I do, it's usually before lunchtime so that my sleep doesn't get disturbed. I just poured myself a glass of coke to get through this current struggle and thought that I shouldn't really have it at this time in case I don't sleep. Of course I'd never have given AL the same consideration and how that ruined my sleep! Just kept on pouring it down my throat! Crazy right?

The kids, especially DD are tired so aiming to get them in bed by just after 6pm, then cook myself a nice dinner, have a bath and watch the programmes we've recorded. Hope everyone is ok?