A quick hello before I head off to bed. Day 13 today, and still tired, but I'm just going to keep on keeping on and just let my body do it's thing and trust that it knows what it needs. My head does get clearer and clearer, which is really great, and at least now that I'm not drinking I can actually hope that things will get better - as opposed to drinking and being tired and knowing that there's not much chance of improvement.....
I'm not having any cravings, which is great, but every day I see how much drinking is such an ingrained habit, that I feel as though I could pour a drink and slip so easily back into that way of spending my evenings - it's quite terrifying. And it keeps me coming back here to read and read and read every day so that my head is filled with both reminders of why this is so important, as well as all the positive support, advice and comments. I really want to fill my head with new ways of thinking so that the old ways are just crowded out eventually and just have no place any longer....
I've also been becoming aware of how badly - and how little - I actually eat! More often now I wake up in the morning HUNGRY, but I'm still not eating as well as I'd like. Now that school and routine are back tomorrow, I'll get back on the AllOne so that I'm getting more fuel in. I also haven't started exercising - part of me wants to wait for the blasted snow to finally go, and part wants to wait till I feel more energetic. That doesn't leave much left to feel motivated to just go out the front door and walk right now. Must start thinking myself into that frame of mind soon!
Lav - enjoy your little bundle! I don't think anyone should ever decide they are too old for a pet - they give us so much joy and comfort, we should never deny ourselves that pleasure! Hope she's house-trained soon though!
PF - sorry to hear things have been so rough. I sooooo get the not-sleeping thing, and I also started drinking in part to just go to sleep and switch off my over-active brain. My docs eventually wouldn't give me sleeping tabs any longer, but then put me on Trazadone, which is like a sedative, but non-addictive. It both helps me get to sleep and STAY asleep. Worth mentioning to your doc perhaps? Helps with anxiety too....
Patrice - good luck with the rowing machine, hope it helps! Glad you've got this place for support, sounds like you've got a challenging life, far away from home and looking after a son all by yourself. Strength to you!
Steady Hands - did you say you are in SA? I grew up in Namibia, but live in Canada now. Say hello to Africa for me!
Okay, enough waffling, time to go to sleep. So nice to be able to say that I'll "see" you all tomorrow when I check in! Nighty-night....
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