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    Newbies Nest

    Lolab thanks for the link I will have a read later when DS is in bed.

    Got some decaff tea so that is me all set for this evening, planning a soak in the bath with my heat mag and then watching The apprentice then an early night with my hypno cd, I am living the rockstar lifestyle this week LOL
    Taking it ODAT

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      Newbies Nest

      Hi All!

      DesertLady - I can appreciate what you said about our bodies and how amazing they are. Despite how we continually damage them, they fight to stay healthy. I was suprised at all my blood work that NOTHING was wrong after a decade+ of heavy drinking and smoking. The body is an amazing machine that fights to stay alive no matter what we do to it. I was really affected by a sentence in the Kick The Drink Easily book, it said "When you pass out, it's your body making a choice between keeping you awake and alive". That scared the jeebers out of me, I passed out SO many nights so my body could focus on just keeping me alive!

      Mauri - You sound great. I have to ask...what the heck do you iron that took so long? I never iron anything...is something wrong with me? LOL Are you ironing sheets and towels? I'm sure you look sharp in all your newly ironed duds. LOL

      Lolab & Patricia - I thought for sure the weight would just "fall off" after I quit consuming 1,200+ useless calories every night, but it didn't. It took a while...I guess because at first I ate whatever I wanted, I figured fat was better than drunk. Now I try to watch what I eat (sometimes) and I'm starting to work out again. I just realized how quickly I can get out of shape. I was doing a DVD workout that I used to blow through no problem, and last night I had to lay down for a minute (yes, in the middle of it!) LOL And it's also irritating to be trying to do situps and have 3 dogs trying to lick your face...but if I put them out they scratch the door the whole time! Aye.

      I guess I've rambled enough, I am off at noon today...back to the vet to check up on my one poochie's skin, she's doing better but still has trouble breathing...poor little fat thing

      Hope you all have a great day!!
      K9
      :heart:I love my daughter more than alcohol:heart:

      Believe in yourself. You are stronger than you think.

      Comment


        Newbies Nest

        Hi restarters

        Ironing? I just tumble dry everything - works for me . . . . Yes I'd like to know how heavy I REALLY WAS ONE WEEK AGO - probably half a stone heavier than I actually was . . . . . K9, guess I'd better start jogging again - started again last September and gave up around February when the bad weather kicked in . . . . . I really am not a natural exerciser - why is everything that is good for you so flamin hard to do . . . . . . Anyhow hope you had a good afternoon, you're a million miles from me - it is around 4.50pm in England and rainy . . . . . Keep safe all. Px
        Short term goal 7 days AF

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          Newbies Nest

          Hey K9 sweetie! I had to laugh at you lying down during your exercise video. I probably would have lain down through the entire thing!:H

          Lolab! QUOTE: And weight didn't come off initially. It was probably well over a month before it started - but now even though I'm at that age where weight is supposed to get REALLY hard to take off and keep off - I am down to my college days weight. And I feel good. I don't diet either./QUOTE

          Lolab, may I please ask how much weight you lost after quitting AL? I have over 50 lbs I'd like to lose, and it seems completely hopeless.:upset: I don't want to work that hard, LOL! If I KNEW I would lose weight, it would be a huge incentive for me to keep AF, although I know that it's just one of many (incentives).

          I drank wine last night. It wasn't very good. Cheap sparkly stuff, and never even felt any different from drinking koolaid ffs! I ended up throwing out the last third of the bottle in disgust. If I'm going to ruin my AF streak, let it be something worthwhile!

          So, I didn't feel bad this morning and I'm at work. I just feel fat, and tired.:upset: Oh, and broke. Called and disconnected my cable tv. I never thought I could live without it, but I'm going to try.


          "I like people too much or not at all."
          Sylvia Plath

          Comment


            Newbies Nest

            Hi LG!

            Sorry you're feeling fat, tired and broke. I can totally relate. I feel out of shape and a little overwhelmed right now because my carpets at my house really need to be cleaned (the recent rain caused an outburst of indoor peeing!), and the grass in my backyard is about a foot high. My dad mowed the front lawn to keep my house looking respectable, but I swear the chihuahua gets lost in the back yard, I can't even see her head. LOL And as far as being broke...I get paid in 8 days and have to go to the vet today. And my daughters school lunch account is probably overdrawn...I figure they won't refuse to feed her right? (I hope) It can all be too much, so we just need to step back and take a breath!! I couldn't afford any beer right now even if I was so inclined to do so! I hope you're doing well and making it to work on time.
            xoxo
            K9
            :heart:I love my daughter more than alcohol:heart:

            Believe in yourself. You are stronger than you think.

            Comment


              Newbies Nest

              Heyyaaa Nesters,
              Pulling up a twig and catching up on here. Fastened my butt velcroe good and tight. Bambi is on the tv for the kids. I'm enjoying my seltzer.

              When I first got home, I sat in my car holding the steering wheel for a solid 5 minutes thinking about wine and going through the motions in my head that lead me to hell.

              1. Wouldn't it be nice to open a nice bottle. The twisting of the opener, the pop, pouring the glass. The sexy glass of wine, so attractive and inviting...
              2. Buying wine because I talk myself into a blatant lie.
              3. Pouring glass after glass with no intention of stopping once I start.
              4. Having my son tell me my breath smells yucky
              5. Cooking and getting louder, drunk by the time my husband gets home, thinking somehow my happy mood and delicious dinner will make up for the fact that I am drunk again.
              6. Seeing his disappointment and how he tries to take over with the kids so they don't see me drinking
              7. Getting upset at him because he "doesn't understand" my addiction and he is judging me.
              8. Kissing my son goodnight and staying awake to continue drinking.
              9. Being mad at my husband for being mad at me and going on Facebook and making calls until Gid knows when
              10. Waking up on the couch with a start and tip toeing to bed so my husband doesn't realize I passed out.
              11. On the way to bed, guzzle a glass of water and take 2 ibuprofen to ward off the hangover
              13. Wake up in the morning and wonder how pissed he is and how did we leave things before I blacked out. Check Facebook, email, call logs and do damage control with husband and kids.
              14. Medicate myself with various medications and concoctions to fight the headache and nausea.
              15.Tell myself I can't keep doing this, something has to change.

              Oh yeah, no I don't want that lying bitch alcohol. 15 steps to misery and insanity.

              No. Thank. You.
              Day 1 again 11/5/19
              Goal 1: 7 days :heartbeat:
              Goal 2: 14 days :happy2:
              Goal 3: 21 days :happy2:
              11/27/19: messed up but back on track
              12/14/19: bad doozy but back on track

              One day at a time.

              Comment


                Newbies Nest

                Hey nesters!

                Dropping in to say hello. LoLab, my coffeemaker broke last night when I rinsed it out! The handle just fell right off. But I'm in broke crowd right now so a new one will have to wait.

                I am having some cravings right now... Daughter is with her dad and it's a beautiful spring evening. A beer on the balcony sounds so nice. But I have thought it through to when I eventually say screw it and run across the street to get my ex bf Sailor Jerry, my true longing, and then get drunk. And then fake sobriety in front of the ex, the daughter, and the gf on skype. I've thought it through to tomorrow morning when I would feel guilty, panicked, and physically awful, working while trying to just get through. And then super strong cravings tomorrow night. So, no thanks.

                I took my l-glut... Unfortunately, I can't find the powder anywhere local! Not Walmart or the health food stores! I ordered some online last night, but right now I have tablets. They aren't even capsules with powder inside, which I had last time and helped. It's been like 30 minutes since I took 3,000 mg and I don't feel it yet.

                Anyway, I don't want to sit at home and white-knuckle it, so I am going to go over to my friends' house for the evening. I'm sure they will be drinking beer, but seriously it's harder for me to not drink when I'm alone. I've been NOT drinking so many times over there lately I doubt they will even offer.

                Just want to chime in and say that I haven't lost any weight either. In fact, I've gained. I'm not sure how much-- I'm a small lady and every pound shows up. But my cute clothes don't fit and it's really depressing. I keep meaning to get back into my yoga routine but so far I haven't.

                Have a good night, all!

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                  Newbies Nest

                  X post, Nursie! I see we are both using the same strategy tonight! Go us! And I love it... 15 steps, that's about right.

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                    Newbies Nest

                    Evening Nesties, I'm having a sober evening here. No cravings. Thank fook, cause I never know when they'll strike.:H

                    However, I am so sick of worrying about money, screaming arguments with my bf daily, depression, etc. Not drinking hasn't lessened it one bit.:upset: Drinking doesn't make it much better either, or scratch that, it does at the time, but we all know you can't drink and not deal with the aftermath.

                    K9 my back yard is like a forest, so I know where you're coming from, LOL. The problem is, my bf could do something about it, but he doesn't. I don't either. I feel overwhelmed by a dirty house packed to the fooking gills with ebay/flea market crap, a yard out of control with weeds, bills that keep mounting....

                    I am writing here everything I worry about, like it's my own personal journal. Things are not as bleak as I paint them, but in my mind they are. I just have to vent, so take what I say with a grain of salt, if you can.


                    "I like people too much or not at all."
                    Sylvia Plath

                    Comment


                      Newbies Nest

                      Library Girl....I found once I got underway a few short weeks, I started cleaning house...literally. I cleaned and organized everything. It was very therapeutic...like I was REALLY getting my house in order ....it was weird, but it felt really good afterwards. Maybe this will happen for you too. It was long overdue...years of things accumulating and I didn't care, or didn't have the energy or time....all I had time to do was drink, and everything else was secondary. It feels great to have things organized now..I don't see how I could have looked past these things before...but I don't understand a lot of that whole dark time. I feel like I missed the last years somewhere. It's good to be back...better than ever! Byrdie
                      All you gotta do, is get thru this day. AF 1/20/2011
                      Tool Box
                      Newbie's Nest

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                        Newbies Nest

                        Byrdie, if I lived alone, I would have long ago started on cleaning up. That is, since I've stopped drinking. However, my bf's business is on ebay and Amazon, and the stuff he sells is everywhere and every time I broach the subject of containing everything or organizing, it turns into a shouting match. I don't know what to do. He says he's working on it, but all I can see is week after week of things still cluttering up my beautiful house.:upset:

                        All I can do is try and live with it. I have (sort of) decided if I can keep my kitchen clean, my bedroom and the bathrooms, I won't worry about the rest of it. The yard MUST be kept up, that is non-negotiable, but maybe, just maybe I can deal with the rest of it. I only hope so.

                        :h LJ


                        "I like people too much or not at all."
                        Sylvia Plath

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                          Newbies Nest

                          Wow, LG, I feel for you. I can't handle a messy house. Especially clutter. And ESPECIALLY someone else's clutter. I'm sorry. I think your plan to just focus on certain rooms is a good one. Good luck!

                          And Byrd-- I think one of the things I am most grateful for since I stopped drinking is that my house is clean. I don't know how I lived with myself! I would clean all the time, but every time I drank it was like the apartment blew up. I do not know how I managed to make such messes in an evening's time!

                          So, my friends cancelled. I am going to put on comfy clothes, fix dinner, and watch Netflix. Maybe I will get to bed super early tonight, since I'm watching something now and my gf won't be skyping tonight. Keepin' it positive, friends, keepin' it positive.

                          Comment


                            Newbies Nest

                            Hi everyone, I hope you are all well.

                            Byrdie, I'm still waiting for my cleaning phase to kick in...it seems like it should have by now, maybe I'm just lazy!!:H

                            Nursie, I liked the list. That sounds familiar.
                            "When you have faults, do not fear to abandon them." Analects of Confucius
                            AF 11/12/11

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                              Newbies Nest

                              K9Lover;1299408 wrote: Hi All!

                              DesertLady - I can appreciate what you said about our bodies and how amazing they are. Despite how we continually damage them, they fight to stay healthy. I was suprised at all my blood work that NOTHING was wrong after a decade+ of heavy drinking and smoking. The body is an amazing machine that fights to stay alive no matter what we do to it. I was really affected by a sentence in the Kick The Drink Easily book, it said "When you pass out, it's your body making a choice between keeping you awake and alive". That scared the jeebers out of me, I passed out SO many nights so my body could focus on just keeping me alive!

                              Mauri - You sound great. I have to ask...what the heck do you iron that took so long? I never iron anything...is something wrong with me? LOL Are you ironing sheets and towels? I'm sure you look sharp in all your newly ironed duds. LOL

                              Lolab & Patricia - I thought for sure the weight would just "fall off" after I quit consuming 1,200+ useless calories every night, but it didn't. It took a while...I guess because at first I ate whatever I wanted, I figured fat was better than drunk. Now I try to watch what I eat (sometimes) and I'm starting to work out again. I just realized how quickly I can get out of shape. I was doing a DVD workout that I used to blow through no problem, and last night I had to lay down for a minute (yes, in the middle of it!) LOL And it's also irritating to be trying to do situps and have 3 dogs trying to lick your face...but if I put them out they scratch the door the whole time! Aye.

                              I guess I've rambled enough, I am off at noon today...back to the vet to check up on my one poochie's skin, she's doing better but still has trouble breathing...poor little fat thing

                              Hope you all have a great day!!
                              K9
                              K9 there were so many quotes in Kick The Drink Easily that really stood out to me, but I remember really being struck by that one too. Most mornings (usually at 3am) I'd wake up thinking, "How in the hell did I get to bed?" So many blackouts. And it made me think of Amy Winehouse. Is that what happened to her? She blacked out because she drank so much? It made me wonder how many times I could have been close to death because of all that I drank. Scary.

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                                Newbies Nest

                                Good evening Nesters,

                                I've got to tell you I did a MAJOR clean out when my husband took off two years ago. I figured if he didn't want to be here then his crap can go too
                                Don't worry about your houses....they'll be OK

                                Hang in there tonight everyone, tomorrow is a brand new day!
                                Wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!

                                Lav
                                AF since 03/26/09
                                NF since 05/19/09
                                Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

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