Newbies Nest

[lifechange]

Newbies Nest

nothing helps me more than reading here. i just read Why i relapsed after 6 years by Nice life in general discussions. Nora had mentioned it in the last pages of Noras story. i'm so thankful for the honesty and openness here.

[patricia]

Newbies Nest

Hi everybody, I've found some hypno apps very useful - one for drinking less and another for relaxation. Could also do with a non hypno one to listen to on my comouter at work though don't want to fall asleep! I can also listen to them in bed and they've den helping me fall asleep. Like gregino my sleep is slowly improving now have Horlicks at night which seems to help. Woke up this morning thinking this is priceless day and now on day 12 - fantastic! Px

[patricia]

Newbies Nest

Sorry folks typing on my iPhone and have made few errors but this is most private way of logging on at weekend if not the most accurate. Px

[ronnie]

Newbies Nest

Hi everyone well I am back again & remembered how much the newby nest folk helped me last time. I am on day 1 today and I am so glad I came back to this site before I got well out of control with my drinking. The last time I was here I think I managed just over 70 days and it felt great. Hope you all have a great day.

[Australia]

Newbies Nest

Welcome back Ronnie! It sure does help to have friends like these!

[LillyE]

Newbies Nest

Hi all,

Well, I made it through the weekend AF! I must confess though, I struggled a bit at book club tonight - we were out at a bar and everyone was drinking a nice red wine. There is usually a fair bit of wine drinking at book club (really it's more an excuse to drink wine and gossip than talk about literature in a serious way). Mainly, I wanted to drink, felt deprived and had to struggle to remember why I wasn't. Gotta work on that gratitude and resolve thing.

Nursie's list helped me here - that was a great tool - as I fast forwarded in my mind to going home buzzed, probably feeling I hadn't had enough, possibly buying a bottle on the way home, drinking too much and feeling wretched Monday when I've so much to do.

Hey Patricia, where do you find the hypno apps? What are they called? I'd quite like to try that.

Lifechange, that six year story was really eye opening for me too. Amazing.

Hi Gregorino!

Welcome back Ronnie - look forward to seeing you beat your personal 70 day best. Tell us why you felt so great then and why drinking again made it worse. Might help both us and you

Hi Australia - I'm kinda guessing you're a fellow down underer

L

[LillyE]

Newbies Nest

Bah. I was right to worry about Thailand. My friend - the heavy drinker who I was worried about but who'd said she wanted to detox/get healthier/lose weight etc - just invited us all to a huge wine tasting event the night after I get there! (Like one of those you buy a tix and get 30 tastings etc) AND there's lots of talk about the resort weekend being a huge boozy one.

Sigh. Makes me feel maybe my current efforts are beating my head against a wall if I'm likely to just throw it all out the window when I get there. And I don't want to spend my holiday struggling with will I/won't I or feeling like a kill joy.

Maybe I'm being too extreme and should feel good about what efforts I'm making to shift perspective/reduce etc even if I'm not totally sober while there - which feels less and less likely. If I start it'll be so hard to stop again.

Ugh. Hate this. Was feeling so good just earlier today too. Any thoughts or words of encouragement welcome.

Lilly x

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Good morning Nesters,

Reporting in from a dark & damp portion of the nest today! At least we still have power

Welcome back ronnie!
Glad you remembered the warm & comfy feelings here. Let us know what your plan is & stay close, OK?

Greetings to patricia, Australia, LillyE & everyone!

I just want to mention a few things......
When I started my journey I made my sobriety my #1 priority! I absolutely had to, there were mo other options for me. I did go away on vacation less than 3 months after my quit & thoroughly enjoyed myself. Coming home proud of myself because I stayed AF was priceless

Lilly, it sounds like you are anticipating problems, I'm sorry to hear that. I know how difficult it is in the early weeks & people/friends can be relentless in their efforts to get you to join them BUT if you truly believe that you can & want to remain AF - you will!
I would be worried about drinking on vacation then hoping to restart my quit when back home Your strength & resolve grows each & everyday you say NO to AL!

Here is the website I've mentioned many times:
The ToDo Institute: Mindfulness, Procrastination, and Gratitude using Morita and Naikan Therapies

I've been a member there many years, love the readings.

Wishing everyone a sober & wonderful AF Subday!
Lav

[LibraryGirl]

Newbies Nest

Lily, would Antabuse be an option for you? You could tell your friends you are on medication and cannot drink, which would be the truth! Hope you can come up with a workable plan!:l

Hello Everyone! It's a rainy Sunday here, but looks like it may be clearing up soon. We had planned to take off today and skip working at the flea market, but the potential to make some extra $$ is too compelling, especially if the weather continues to clear.

BF's bday is tomorrow. He will be 32. I am thinking about what I might could do, but I'd like to do something special that's not so expensive. Neither of us are big restaurant goers, so we would prefer to eat in...Possibly I could bring home some good take-out. Any ideas?

I've not drank for 6 days. I had to count, lol, and it's becoming less and less of an issue for me. That is, I'm thinking less and less of AL. Yesterday I made a couple of comments that I really wished I could buy some AL for the evening b/c I was depressed and wanted an "escape", but I didn't seriously consider it, and didn't.

Hope you all are having a nice day.

LG:h

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Hey Nest!
Lilly.. I don't remember the dose of Lexapro I was taking, but it was my first go with one, so I would assume he started me out on a low dose. I gained 8 pounds! Yes, I was able to lose that when I got onto something else, so it didn't stick, but I worked at it. By the end of my drinking days, I wasn't eating much at all, in fact...saving the calories for AL. I wanted to lose weight to look good, but was drinking like crazy and killing my body. A twisted mess I was.
On the issue of the vacation to Thailand...you are in a tight spot, but if I had the gift of hindsight, I'd tell you I put myself thru absolute hell the year I tried to moderate. I mays well write that year off, in terms of progress...all I did was drink harder and more secretively than I ever did. Had I been able to commit to my quit then...I would have 2 years down there on my date. I would ask you why are you even putting yourself thru hell now if you are just going to cave then? I hope you don't take that the wrong way...but if you are leaving the door open to drink then why bother to quit now? Having said that...and having read your posts, and having the gift of hindsight...I'd say implement a policy of zero tolerance on your part. Forge ahead and say that you WILL have an AF vacation. Lots of people do it! Take the agony out of the equation...You Don't Drink, and that is it. Someone mentioned a while back about herion addicts...would it be acceptable for them to use just a little bit while on vacation? Once you stop putting yourself thru the agony and take that choice off the table, you might be surprised at how you feel. HOPE IS NOT A STRATEGY, you must have your plan in place and stick to it no matter what and no matter who. Sorry to be such a hardliner on this...but see my posts from between 1/31/10 and 1/20/11 and see that person who fooled herself thinking she could handle it. That's just me....but I see an awful lot more similarites to us all on this site when it comes to AL than I do differences. Byrdie

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

I just wanted to add, if it seems impossible to go on vacation and not drink....we have a member on here who is a Vintner...and he's been AF for quite a while. What seems like an impossibility IS possible....you eat the elephant one bite at a time. B

[Trigirl]

Newbies Nest

Hi everyone I am pretty new around here , started posting yesterday and managed my first day AF, this is day two , hubby has just cracked open his first tinny and a cold glass of white wine would be desirable right now as I get ready to prepare dinner . But I am determined not to . Hope the resolve holds !
Have ordered some Kudzu and some L-Glut after reading posts about their help .
Can I creep into the nest for some support ? All you guys are so supportive to each other .
I am just getting used to the site and forums and all my posts are from Smart phone so am a bit clunky !

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Hello & welcome Trigirl!
The Nest is the perfect place, please settle in for a while. Congrats on day 1 AF, keep it going. Wait until you feel the pride in your accomplishment grow

Greetings Byrdie & LG!
Chinese take-out always makes me happy LG

[lifechange]

Newbies Nest

good evening lovely nesters.
i am happy to say that today was much easier than yesterday. like Byrdie always says, we usually get a break after a difficult day. i was all set to fight hard this afternoon but i didn't have to. i was a bit worried about returning dvds to the video store tonight so i didn't go. would rather pay 2euros extra tomorrow than risk spending much more on a bottle of wine and regret tomorrow.
so the kids are getting ready for bed and i'm getting ready for a quiet evening.

sending you all positive, sober vibes for a cozy, relaxed sunday.

[LillyE]

Newbies Nest

Thanks Lavande, that really helped.

Sorry for venting negatively here all. I just had a moment of panic/despair about it all after reading all these booze-related Facebook messages.

BUT, the good news is that I sent my friend an email explaining a bit more about why I'm not drinking and, to her absolute credit, she sent me back a very loving and supportive message!! And from that I think if I open up even more while there - and stick to my guns about not drinking - she will be supportive, and it might even be a good reinforcer for her too about cutting back. (Personally I think she thinks she's just a heavy drinker but I think - having seen that drinking - she's in denial about it all. But I'm not going to push that one if she's not there though maybe I can lead by example.)

So, really, it's all down to me now strengthening my resolve that I can not drink and have fun and can do it.

Library Girl - birthday... an indoor picnic? Nice cheese, bread, meats, antipasto, some fresh flowers, a rug on the floor? Or outdoor at sunset - even better - depending on the weather there?

Byrdlady, wow, I just converted pounds to kilos and, yep, that's about exactly what I've gained since being on Lexapro And nothing else has really changed - if anything I'm exercising more than I was. And, I don't find your comments re Thailand too hardline. It's just the kind of thing I need to hear right now! So, thank you. I am going to go look at your moderating posts later as another reinforcers.

Thanks all of you for the support. I need a kick right now!!

Welcome Trigirl! You'll find great support here.

Lilly