Newbies Nest

[Sportymom]

Newbies Nest

Hi everyone - super nervous.....first post. But I figured with all of the other new people posting it was a great time to say hello! I have been on the site for a week now and just got enough courage to sign up.

Byrdlady - I loved your post about moderation vs. being completely AF. I thought I could taper off my drinking but then everyday I had a war going on with myself about drinking. Should I do it or should it be an AF day. Of course, I often chose drinking because that was the easiest choice for me. You have all inspired me to try and go AF and if I can make it through today it will be 10 days!! So happy. I don't think I have gone 10 days in over 15 years.

Thanks for all of your inspiring stories and helpful hints. This has been my favorite thread.

:thanks:

[K9Lover]

Newbies Nest

Welcome SportyMom! We are glad you are here! 10 days is great. Tell us how you've managed it...it's always inspiring for newbies to hear the stories of others. Awesome job, keep it up!

BellBell, How much were you drinking daily? I drank a 12 pack + of beer daily for a decade and when I quit I hardly had any WD's (some shakes, nausueated, tired). BUT, we are all different, so if you are scared, you should go to a doctor. They can prescribe you something to get you through the first few days. Good luck and let us know how you are doing ok?

[Sportymom]

Newbies Nest

Days 1-5 were the hardest days. I thought about drinking all day. I used some of the suggestions I learned from MWO. I figured out what my triggers are: boredom, wanting to unwind, stressful day with my teenager..... My worst time of day is before dinner, I love the wine! I tried to keep myself busy, busy, busy. Walk the dog, garden, run errands, make phone calls, do laundry, clean a closet. Anything to get my mind off the wine! After day 5 it got easier, but this weekend was a big challenge. My hubbie and I usually go to happy hour every Friday night so I asked him if we could go for a bike ride instead. He loved that idea. He is not a big drinker.

Unfortunately, I have not gotten the courage to tell my husband I want to stop drinking. I'm not sure how he will feel about it. I know he wanted me to cut back on the drinking, but saying I'm trying to stop altogether is admitting that I have a big problem. I have hidden my drinking really well. Mostly at home when I'm alone were my big drinking nights. When the family is home I always kept the wine drinking under control somewhat. But I drank wine every night and it ended up being a bigger problem than I wanted to admit. Quitting has been a huge challenge!!

[SAUSAGE]

Newbies Nest

Sporty

Just wanted to say hi and welcome.

I wouldn't stress about having a big "conversation" with your husband about quitting altogether.

Just take one day at a time. If he asks, say you are trying to stop for a few weeks just to give your body a rest. After a month or so you can say " I feel so much better without it, I don't want to go back to my old habits" hopefully he will prefer the "new you" and it won't be an issue.

The first time I quit, I went on and on to my husband about it. This time I don't really discuss it as I don't want him to try and talk me into trying to moderate.

Sausage x
Day 74

[Sportymom]

Newbies Nest

Thank you Sausage. Really good advice. I seem to be making a big issue about everything related to drinking right now. I really didn't think I was capable of going this long AF. Now I don't even know how to handle the social part of the drinking. I was really just trying to stop the at home by myself part of the drinking. But I feel so good I want to see if I can stop drinking all together.

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Hello & welcome Sportymom,
CONGRATS on your 10 AF days - WTG
Glad you decided to join us, there's always plenty of room in te Nest!

Rooniferd, yuo have to stop drinking today if you want tomorrow to be half decent. Hope you have switched to water by now. What's your plan??

bellbell, have you read the MWO book yet?
You really need to do so, it will help calm your fears. If there is truly any need for medical attention, get yourself to a hospital. Download the pdf from the Health store here & read it tonight.
Buying beer tonight is not going to make you better, only prolong your misery.

Hello to everyone else ~ a very busy nest day indeed

[resrchqueen]

Newbies Nest

Hi SPORTYMOM... There sure are a lot of us women who love wine... in large quantities and like an apple a day...I could have wrote your post myself... triggers...making dinner, cleaning my whole house and wanting to reward myself..yah right. Not a good idea. It is hard to modify the behavior that is for sure but it is encouraging to read the stories of peeps here who have successfully done so!!! Kudos to you all!

[K9Lover]

Newbies Nest

Sporty,

Thanks for posting how you got through those hard first days. I did the same thing. I had to force myself to do the exact OPPOSITE of what I was used to. Since I drank at home only, the first few days I went out...movies, shopping, library, park...etc. But you can't avoid home forever, so once I decided it was time to tackle a night at home, I rearranged a few things (lamps, a chair), so that my drinking "spot" looked different. Every little thing helps. You're doing great. I wouldn't make a big deal of it to the hubby, just let some time pass and tell him how great you're feeling.

Keep up your good work!

K9

[Sportymom]

Newbies Nest

K9 - I actually used your advice from a previous post about rearranging my drinking spot. I won't even go in that room in the evenings right now. It's so strange to realize that I spent so much time there drinking. Thanks for the great advice

[resrchqueen]

Newbies Nest

Guys I bought the book several days ago and got a receipt email and a we'll be in touch email about the link to downloading the book but still nothing...yet Paypal took the 12.95 from my bank...anybody have any ideas who long it takes. I have called and emailed and NOTHING....I sure would like to read the book!

[rooniferd]

Newbies Nest

Checking in....thanks for the concern. I ended up having three mimosas at the bar, but I'm home now, and there's no alcohol in the house. I won't wake up feeling fabulous tomorrow, but I won't wake up major hungover either. I sat at the bar today and really thought about things - more than usual. I thought about about all the close calls, the missed opportunities, the lost money, the whole thing. I wonder if this is REALLY it - the time I quit for good. Should I be thinking one day at a time, or one lifetime at a time? Why is this such a hard quest? I mean gosh, alcohol is so evil, and so it's so obvious what it's caused in my life....I know you people don't know me, but I feel like this just might be the time I really turn things around. Please have some confidence in me and help me through this. Please hold me accountable. Tomorrow is day one, and I mean it.

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

rooniferd, you will have all the support here but you still need to do the work. What's your plan?
Visit the tool box, take some time to sit down & write out your plan of action ~ it really helps.

resrchqueen - It's been so long since I purchased the book, I'm sorry I don't remember the process but I'm sure I got it quickly. I'll look & see if I can figure out who you should contact.

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

resrchqueen -

Did you try this?


How do I contact you?

Please let us know if you have any questions. You can call us on our toll free at 866-505-5518 (please add country code if you are not in the U.S.) or email us at helpdesk@capalo.com.

[bellbell]

Newbies Nest

Guys I absolutly love you. K9lover thank you for sharing your expierience. Thanks to you I'm at home and there is no beer in my fridge. I'm also drinking for over decade, heavly for about 5 years (after divorce). Similar to you. Ill try it. Resrchqueen I will watch my heart rate, good advice. Lavande I'm planning to buy book today, it will give me something to do tomorrow on my off day.
Rooniferd be strong. I'm counting hours not days. Mayby on day 8 I'll stop it, to much math
What always helped me to fight hangover, and I almost never had it, is to make sure I have 8 hrs sleep, and if I was drinking to much I will drink Gatorade, all 32 oz. before bed. It is helping with dehydration.

[BelleGirl]

Newbies Nest

Hi Nesties,
It's been a while (like a week or so, which is a long time here in the nest...lots of new faces)! I do read faithfully from my phone every night and morning, but just HATE trying to post anything from the phone.

Hello and welcome to all the new nesters. As Lav always says, "This is a good place"...and I wholeheartedly agree with that.

I'm still doing OK, and seeing that clarity that is so often mentioned when going sober for an extended period of time. I've also had a few observations:

1) I am very tired lately. And now I am wondering if that is because I feel so good in the morning I get so much done...maybe I over do it??? Mowed the lawn at 10am this morning...that would have been unheard of in the drinking days. I barely sit down on most days. So, maybe I am so tired because I am doing so much? Or maybe I'm just old. :H I've had nearly everything checked out in my body the past 6 months, so I am pretty sure I'm OK physically.

2) I now feel like I "fit in" with other folks. My drinking was done in secret, so inside myself I always felt like I was different than everyone else when I got together with other people. I felt this way especially when getting together with women friends. Now I see people with a clear conscience and clear mind. Can't put a price on that!

So, I am very thankful...and still going at it One Day At A Time. Hubby drank a beer and a half (wow...what a lush...:H) yesterday. I held my breath when I poured his leftovers down the sink, just in case the beer "smelled good".

Our wedding anniversary, and of course Mother's Day is coming up next week. Not reasons to drink. Nobody can make me drink. I so fear that "one drink" that will send me back down the rabbit hole...

Take care everyone...