Newbies Nest

[Topper12]

Newbies Nest

Good On ya Kradle!!! Im on Day 5 too!! Your be fine!!! Just keep in going!!! Your doing Great!!!!!

[Destiniey]

Newbies Nest

Kradle....I will share in with your boo-hoo moment! I was doing GREAT until about 40 minutes ago. This intense craving came over me and I even opened up a capsule of L-Glut and put it under my tongue...but gross.....it turns to friggin paste! Ha! I am waiting for this to pass. Day 4 has been good until now and I thought I had a great handle on this! Be happy that you are on day 5...I am struggling right now to get where you are. Monique said that day 5 is the charm...I am going to keep that in my mind! Stay strong and know that I am feeling as crappy as you...lets try to get through this together!!!!!!!!!!

[FlyAway]

Newbies Nest

Destiniey if you don't drink you will never wake up tomorrow wishing that you had. You will be pissed off and depressed if you do. Think about tomorrow and what you want in the long run, not just right now.

[Destiniey]

Newbies Nest

Thanks Fly....I am. I am imagining how horrible my whole weekend will be if I just take 1 sip....thanks for the encouragement!

[FlyAway]

Newbies Nest

You need to do something to distract yourself. Can you go out for a walk or jog? Anything physical will help or something that requires your coordination or attention.

[Destiniey]

Newbies Nest

I am heading out to distract myself now! I will be back on here later!!!!!! SOBER and hopefully less miserable! Grrrrrr

[SAUSAGE]

Newbies Nest

Destiniey
Can you watch the Rain in My heart documentaries on You Tube? I always do that when I am struggling. Day 4 and day 5 is about as hard as it gets. It gets easier with every day once you pass a week. Keep going

[Kradle123]

Newbies Nest

I am sorry you're not feeling tip top either Destiny, but my misery does appreciate your company

And fly you are right in reminding us/me that tomorrow I will be happy that I made it through today.

FYI I know that I am bi polar which accounts for a great deal of my self medicating- I wasn't diagnosed until 2005 but by then it was too late. I do remember being incredibly relieved that I finally had an explanation as to why I would fall apart hearing an onstar commercial or become super unglued when someone didn't call me back... Than I got so upset that had someone caught this earlier, and there were a lot of counselors along the way, we most likely would not be having this conversation on MWO...

So I mention this because even with medication it seems that without the al my mindset swings dramatically and I am trying to be mindful of that. So thank you so much for keeping me connected today. Like LB no one knows I am even having a problem. except you wonderful people.

Okay, feeling better. Going back out to plant.
Xxoo
PS-the twins are in the hot tub singing God Bless America..it is too cute

[rooniferd]

Newbies Nest

Well, the boo hoo stage hit me too earlier, but I'm OK now. I came home from the coffee shop and got really lonely. I started thinking about how the bars were probably hopping with happy people and how I could just go out for one or two to socialize. But I knew I couldn't. Then I thought I could go to a restaurant and have dinner, but then I got really depressed because I knew it would be all couples there on a Friday night, esp. on a holiday weekend. I got fed up with my depressed mood, told myself I am so lucky to be alive and healthy. I shifted my focus from what I don't have (a boyfriend and a normal drinking habit) to what I do have - everything!

I went to Whole Foods, bought some delicious food, and came home and cooked it. Now I'm in for some house cleaning and a long walk when it cools down.

No, BEAST, I am not hanging with you tonight!

[Kradle123]

Newbies Nest

Hi Roon
It is a beast!
It is so warm here in Port Orchard and I can see Seattle from the beach... I can see mt Rainer too and the kids playing in the sand and I will breath in and then out and then in and then out and like you think and focus on all the deep gifts I have and that I am trusted to care for them. In out in out... Day six here we come
Xxoo

[FlyAway]

Newbies Nest

It will get easier guys, just stick with it. The only way you'll have to go through this again is if you drink. Don't drink and it gets easier and easier. You're going through the worst of it. It's worth it. :l

[LibraryGirl]

Newbies Nest

Hi All. Thanks for being concerned about me. I really shouldn't have posted. My bf and his friend got into a big blowout and they were upset, and I got upset listening. I think I'm menopausal or something because I want to cry at the slightest provocation, although today was pretty intense.

Went on FB last night to pm a long-time friend whom I had not pmed in over 2 years, and my old messages came up. How embarrassing!! I saw what I had written one night, drunk as a coot. Really, really disgusting. It's hard to believe he even talks to me now. That's what I needed to see. Evidence.

I've been watching "The Killing" on Netflix this afternoon and tonight. Have "wasted" the entire day. I just couldn't get motivated to do anything. I actually went out to do a little shopping and when I went to a store that was supposed to have something I needed, I couldn't find it, and I left my cart in an aisle with stuff in it and left the store. Not been the best day, but I'm not drinking.

Hope everyone is doing ok.

LG

[FlyAway]

Newbies Nest

LG I can't tell you how many times I woke up vaguely remembering typing something out either on Facebook or a bulletin board or an email and thinking, "OMFG, what did I write?!" Truly embarrassing stuff. You are not alone. Hooray for you for not drinking. We all have shitty days and good days, but drinking doesn't make either one of them better, only worse.

[Destiniey]

Newbies Nest

I'm here and I'm..yes..SOBER! YAY! I can see that alot of us on here aren't having a very good day...is it the friggin moon or something! Ha! I had the WORST craving ever....I mean..I never would've felt that way in the past because I would've just started drinking. But I threw the L-Glut under my tongue...Ewwwww...came on here and FlyAway was here and talked me through it! It lasted a long time and I was so tempted to get in the car and go to the liquor store but I thought of all of you and I knew I wasn't alone. So I paced back and forth in the living room telling myself over and over that I could do this and how disgusted I would feel tomorrow and how horrible I would feel going back to day 1 and it finally passed. Holy crap...it was HORRIBLE! But I feel soo much better now and I just read all the posts since my last post and the support is awesome! I am truly blessed to have all of you in my life.... you totally saved it!

Kradle...that is too cute about the twins singing in the hot tub...it sounds like you live in a beautiful place. I ended up going out to the barn after my breakdown (ha) and fed the horses and took deep breaths in and out and thought about how truly lucky I am! Good luck on day 6!!!!!!

Rooni....I am soooooooo glad you are hanging tough too.

LB...I have done the same thing on FB...totally embarassing! But that is the past and we are moving forward. I plan on chilling on my bed tonight with my dogs and watching a movie...not quite sure yet but I do know that whatever I watch I will remember it in the morning! Ha!

[Destiniey]

Newbies Nest

Sausage...I have never watched those documentaries although I have heard alot about them on here. I am definitely going to check them out tonight...thanks so much for reminding me about them!