Newbies Nest

[lolab]

Newbies Nest

https://www.mywayout.org/community/f7...-faq-3968.html

[Fin]

Newbies Nest

Boot Camp Roll Call for June 28, 2012

(*Add your name to this running list if you want a daily log by hitting the Quote button on this post)

Fin - Day 11 (Chasing Week 2)
Next name here - Day


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[Fin]

Newbies Nest

Wow was last night hard at day/night 11! It's all about breaking links in the chain, or associations with AL. Last night my wife went out with friends and left me home alone to hang with the kids. Normally this was an open invitation to let the IPAs flow! I was so-so-so-so close to stepping into my garage where there are some IPAs in the refrigerator and nabbing one.

What saved me? Someone (sorry, I tried to find it but couldn't easily) posted that what's different about some of us is that we CRAVE it and that's not good. I could feel myself starving for it, craving deeply. As such, I just kept coaching myself that it isn't normal to crave the IPA so intensely and that such a craving would surely lead to my wanting more and more and then wham'o, back to square one with all the regret others have expressed here.

Anyway, once again the collective voice of this site pulled me from the clutches of the AL doom we're all trying so hard to pound into submission. It will come...it will...that day we'll all wake up, go through the entire day and not think once about AL. It just won't be relevant anymore and I'm committed to that vision as it really is righteous. What I don't want it to reflect on my life in old age and regret that I was too weak to take control where I needed to. It's also great to see clear eyes in photos vs. the haggard look. I want my kids to remember me for my clarity, not as some AL pounding loser.

'nough said. Stay strong, my friends.

-Fin

[Tipplerette]

Newbies Nest

Fin;1342344 wrote: Wow was last night hard at day/night 11! It's all about breaking links in the chain, or associations with AL. Last night my wife went out with friends and left me home alone to hang with the kids. Normally this was an open invitation to let the IPAs flow! I was so-so-so-so close to stepping into my garage where there are some IPAs in the refrigerator and nabbing one.

What saved me? Someone (sorry, I tried to find it but couldn't easily) posted that what's different about some of us is that we CRAVE it and that's not good. I could feel myself starving for it, craving deeply. As such, I just kept coaching myself that it isn't normal to crave the IPA so intensely and that such a craving would surely lead to my wanting more and more and then wham'o, back to square one with all the regret others have expressed here.

Anyway, once again the collective voice of this site pulled me from the clutches of the AL doom we're all trying so hard to pound into submission. It will come...it will...that day we'll all wake up, go through the entire day and not think once about AL. It just won't be relevant anymore and I'm committed to that vision as it really is righteous. What I don't want it to reflect on my life in old age and regret that I was too weak to take control where I needed to. It's also great to see clear eyes in photos vs. the haggard look. I want my kids to remember me for my clarity, not as some AL pounding loser.

'nough said. Stay strong, my friends.

-Fin

Fantastic for rationalizing your cravings. In the height of their intensity this is no easy feat. You echo my sentiments as to looking back at the end of one's life with regrets pertaining to not ever gaining control over the one habit that cripples us in every way. We are better than that!

[Tipplerette]

Newbies Nest

Fin - Day 11 (Chasing Week 2)
Tipplerette - Day 9 - almost at double digits

Love this roll call. We are stronger as a team.

[Fin]

Newbies Nest

Tipplerette;1342349 wrote: Fin - Day 11 (Chasing Week 2)
Tipplerette - Day 9 - almost at double digits

Love this roll call. We are stronger as a team.

you go girl! Double digits are mighty fine.

[K9Lover]

Newbies Nest

Fin,

Awesome job last night! You thought it through and got past the cravings. Nobody ever died from cravings! And as I always like to say "A craving never lasts as long as a hangover". I've had a few "drinking thoughts" lately too. But I sit myself down and REALLY think about it. If I drank, it would not be how I envisioned it. It's not butterflies and rainbows and a cozy feeling for me. It's more like handcuffs, jail, and a cellmate named Diablo. That's MY reality. No matter how many times I've tried, it's never been and never will be, the happy experience that I wish it was.

Good for you for seeing past the "buzz" and into the reality. That's a HUGE accomplishment and you should be proud!

K9

[teezah]

Newbies Nest

Fin - Day 11 (Chasing Week 2)
Tipplerette - Day 9 - almost at double digits
Teezah - Day 5

Well done everyone - doing great!

[Audrey14]

Newbies Nest

Morning Nesters!!

Just felt that i really need to be in Nest too not only in MWO
My Day 9 starts and i'm really happy. It' s first time that i have so much AF days since i arrived in Australia last September..
In 1 week i have to start my journey for 2 days from South Australia to North Europe, so i'm really concerned 1) airports and airplanes are always places where i drink 2) my daughter' s graduation and celebration (but she knows my AL problem, so this will be more easy..i know my bad character to worry in advance about future so i'm trying to calm down and telling myself mantra "ODAT".

At least i'm very determined NOT TO DRINK till my flight next week friday morning. If i' ll be successful (I HAVE TO!!!!!!) i'll have 15 AF days and this (i have hope) will help me to relax and go thrue these long flights which i hate..i like flights which lasts not more than 7 hours (it gives you a lot of time to think) but i hate to be stucked in a closed place for more than 12 hours..maybe with age i become claustrofobic
I already checked Kuala Lumpur airport (normaly i go via Singapore or HongKong), they have showers and some massage places..i' ll be here 8 hours..i know i have to have a really detailed plan..
Sorry for beeing such neirotic (which i am) Now i'll focuss on today.

Wishing everybody Day which gives you satisfaction and self-approval before you enter your night dreams!:h

[LillyE]

Newbies Nest

Fin - Day 11 (Chasing Week 2)
Tipplerette - Day 9 - almost at double digits
Teezah - Day 5
Lilly - Day 12 (almost 2 weeks again!)

Well done Fin for conquering those cravings and, as K9 nicely put it, seeing past the buzz to the reality.

Library Girl, it's cool if you're just taking a break from the Nest but please don't feel you need to 'keep a wide berth'. I really appreciate your posts here. I have also been concerned about you from your other threads and comments here. Sounds to me like you're toying more and more with the idea of 'moderation' and seeking reason to do so. Or, perhaps you've really made up your mind again to drink again at some point and if you have I'd guess it will be sooner than later. (And also, from my own experience, that it's perhaps futile to try and talk you out of it if you're decided)

You're an intelligent woman and of course you can make your own choices and I don't really know what's best for you, but from all the recent talk here about the dangers of this slope for those of us who really have a problem with Al then it worries me for you. Can you get back to WHY you quit to begin with? What's good for you about being AF? Would trying to mod really be worth taking the risk of returning to daily drinking. I know you think that won't happen but I'd say from all the evidence here there's a good chance it would - if not right away then at some stage. Let's say there's even just a 20% of that happening and you finding it harder to quit again. Would that be worth it?

If you missed them on here the other day these threads are great food for thought re 'moderation':

Thinking of Trying to Mod
https://www.mywayout.org/community/f1...e-3-53575.html

Why I don't have 2 years
https://www.mywayout.org/community/f9...day-43098.html

Now What
https://www.mywayout.org/community/f7...ml#post1210669

I'm sorry to nag hon but the feelings you're expressing - I'm ok, I've proved I can quit, it's so extreme to not drink AT ALL EVER - are what I start feeling before every time I go back to it and you have further along than me that you'd be throwing away. How long is it today?

Welcome Audrey - good to see another Down Under (er) in the Nest. A bunch of us are doing a 30 day 'boot camp' to reach 30 days. Join us

As for your trip, making a detailed plan isn't neurotic - it's a very, very smart idea!

[LibraryGirl]

Newbies Nest

Hi Lily. Thanks for the concern, hon, and I do get where you're coming from. I have even said it myself, lol. I'm not sure whether I will drink again, but if I feel like having a drink at some point in the future, I won't rule it out. I do plan on not drinking spirits, as I think that is likely to be something more difficult to control. I have not drank any spirits since February. I drank in April, 3 beers once, then the other half of the six pack about a week later. Then in May I had one glass of wine.

I am 48 yo and I have never wanted to drink when I woke in the morning. I have also never slammed shots all night or drank straight from a liqour bottle, or wine bottle. I have never hidden bottles and actually found it strange when I first read of people doing that. I have never carried alcohol to work, or sat in my car and drank either. I got in the habit of drinking every night, but I believe it was more habit than need, as I found it easier than most to put it down.

I am not foolish. I will admit defeat if I feel like I am struggling or feeling compelled to drink, after I have a drink. I like being sober and don't feel the need to drink every night as I was anymore, and it's a relief. I'm just not sure I'm completely done with drinking altogether, but if I never drink again that would be ok too, I guess.

Don't worry, I will stick around regardless.

LG

It is 47 days or so, isn't it? I can't keep up anymore, lol.

[LillyE]

Newbies Nest

Library Girl, further to the above, been reading elsewhere too and I don't want to annoy you by repeating what's been said elsewhere already. I agree with you that Nancy's post was a good and balanced one. I'm not saying you can't moderate - I don't know - but I'm just being concerned and not wanting to see you slip back into the abyss. Just promise us one thing - that whether you decide to drink or not and whether it goes well or badly you'll keep coming here and sharing how you're doing, ok?

I can't guarantee I won't be thinking the same in a week or month. I can well see that I might. And I can't claim to know what the outcome would be, as Nancy is right that there are different degrees of problems and control. However, I KNOW that I am far from a normal drinker, even if I can see that I'm not 'as bad as some', so if I drink there is always going to be a big risk of it being far more bad for me than good.

But, god, I know, committing to being 100% AF forever still feels like a huge ask. Just this morning I was thinking about feeling 'boring' again of a weekend. Still need to keep focusing on all the good things about it and reaching for those 39 days for now.

But I digress. Back to work for me for now but it's almost the weekend… whoo!

[Kradle123]

Newbies Nest

Boot Camp Roll Call for June 28, 2012

Fin - Day 11 (Chasing Week 2)
Kradle123 Day 14 tuff one

[LillyE]

Newbies Nest

Hey LG,

Just to clarify, that second post of mine wasn't a response to your post - cross post. Just thought it would look that way since it appeared after yours.

I'm glad it sounds like you're weighing it up and only you know what's best for you and perhaps you can drink in a more controlled fashion if you pick it up again. I really hope so if you do. I can't recall exactly what brought you here or how bad it had got for you.

We might be similar in that way though, that while it had obviously gotten bad enough for us to drive us here, I also have never done most of the things you mentioned and, I admit, have read stories here and thought 'well I'm nowhere near as bad as THAT', which I'm sure is common.

I actually think this is in a way makes it harder than someone who clearly hits rock bottom and KNOWS they need to quit for good. I mean, it's better in that alcohol hasn't destroyed our life as much (yet?) but harder to sustain the motivation of sobriety and not keep romancing the idea of ... just a few... sometimes.

Ah, I don't have the answers. All I know is that this feels like the right thing for me, for now, so I want to ride this motivation all I can as long as it lasts and see where it takes me.

I'm glad to hear you'll stick around either way !

[teezah]

Newbies Nest

Boot Camp Roll Call

Boot Camp Roll Call for June 29, 2012

Teezah Day 6

Signing off for a few days as we go to respite. I'll pop in if I get a connection, but if I don't, then see you next Thursday which will be day 13 boot camp.