Newbies Nest

[Pinecone]

Newbies Nest

:welcome:TexasAg, Cocoflo, Bluburd, WashingtonSt, Lucelastic and Middlepath, welcome new faces! :welcome: I probably missed a few, sorry about that.

I haven't posted here in a while, usually just reading now helps me stay connected.

To everyone that is new, this is a really helpful place, a gamechanger that can give you alot of support to finally get the upper hand on our common problem. Something inside you gave you alot of strength to come on here. Find that part of yourself and protect it like your last match in a windstorm!!! That is the part of yourself that you need to nurture and start listening to alot more (not the other voice).

K9, I really appreciated your last few posts. Like many here, I am done fooling myself with a false promise of moderation. I'm not interested in it like an academic problem. It doesn't work for me. It is a hellish dead end. But I'm listening to MY voice now, not that other sniveling, bargaining leech.

FinallyDone, great to see you and you said it: "Being myself again..."

Byrdlady, great post!

[finallydone]

Newbies Nest

Kradle123;1351797 wrote: Byrd- Your posts most always make me cry. In a good way? They are always so loving (even the tough ones...) and right on the money. I need a tissue. :h

Lifechange your words meant so much to me. Even though I know I have tried to make my words meaningful while I was drinking, I don't think I was all there....so it feels good to b al there for a change when I'm talking now!

FD- I'm so happy to see you and you sound soooo good! 120 Days! :wd:
There's my personal,applause.

Now on to really important matters: I'm glad fishing is good but the Crabbing is fantastic!! Sedona ate so much Dungeness last night she got a major tummy ache !!

I have a great picture of Madison with the first Dungy of the season but o far NO ONE CAN TELL ME HOW TO UPLOAD IT TO THIS POST...So I am appealing to your fishermans heart as I think I have seen you post a pic or two. How does one do this ?
You won't be disappointed. It's a great photo.

BLU is there any way you can pull off a Mrs Doubtfire and order a great dinner - full menue delivered and pretend you cooked it?? Or maybe oprder bits and pieces of it like side dishes..
Cooking dinners was ALWAYS my downfall. I got so wasted one Thanksgiving, they ate the meal without me..That was a Very low point in my life.Didn't stop me though.
If you cant do that maybe get lots of other people to help you. Tell them you are under the weather. People love to help at parties. Gives them something to do! Keep us posted. :h

It's just me and Matt for a few days as the tins are off camping now with daddy. To be honest, I really need the break.

Hugs for a happy evening,
:l

Thank you Kradle! And your posts are like looking into a door of a day. It's awesome!

[finallydone]

Newbies Nest

Pinecone;1351823 wrote: :welcome:TexasAg, Cocoflo, Bluburd, WashingtonSt, Lucelastic and Middlepath, welcome new faces! :welcome: I probably missed a few, sorry about that.

I haven't posted here in a while, usually just reading now helps me stay connected.

To everyone that is new, this is a really helpful place, a gamechanger that can give you alot of support to finally get the upper hand on our common problem. Something inside you gave you alot of strength to come on here. Find that part of yourself and protect it like your last match in a windstorm!!! That is the part of yourself that you need to nurture and start listening to alot more (not the other voice).

K9, I really appreciated your last few posts. Like many here, I am done fooling myself with a false promise of moderation. I'm not interested in it like an academic problem. It doesn't work for me. It is a hellish dead end. But I'm listening to MY voice now, not that other sniveling, bargaining leech.

FinallyDone, great to see you and you said it: "Being myself again..."

Byrdlady, great post!

Hi pinecone! Thank you!! And wow it's been on hell of journey to 120 days...starting in just 4 hours...wow.

[Butterbean]

Newbies Nest

Welcome all the Newbies! I am SOOOO happy for you that you found this place. Whether your goal is for complete abstinence or moderation, just get through those first 30 days in baby steps before you really decide! Thirty days sounded so daunting when I started and I am now at day 32.

Maybe it was just a bribe to myself as a reward but my goal was for moderation when I started. I was crying every day and was so depressed at the mess I was in but also missing my "friend" my "reward" my "crutch" my "relief" at the end of the day... ALCOHOL!

As each day and week has gone by it HAS gotten easier. I have been through many social situations and I was so worried about what I was going to say and what my friends would think. My sweet sweet husband said the coolest thing that made me feel like the biggest fool but it has stuck with me SOOO much!! He said "People notice WAY more when you drink than when you don't drink!" It is so true, I would talk louder and louder, interrupt people, say idiotic things, be a know-it-all. The sick thing was, it was like an outer body experience where I was above myself watching saying "STOP!" But I couldn't. Most of the times though, I would have no memory, and that was worse.

Now I am through my thirty days so I guess that means I can drink to "reward" myself again, or just to prove to myself that I can just stick to 2 glasses of wine and be done with it..... What is so wonderful is every time I check back in here, I am reassured that I don't want to go back to where I was. I am not saying I am going to be AF forever or that I want to moderate. I just know that right now I feel great and it keeps getting easier and better with every social obstacle or bad day that I have and don't drink. I am not obsessing about it like I did (I still think about it and want it but it is easier to distract myself.) I am not saying I won't slip up again. I just know that this place is safe place to vent, cry and expose all my shameful experiences and feelings and know I will be supported. Thanks for letting me be here, guys. It feels like family.

[bluburd]

Newbies Nest

Kradle123;1351797 wrote:
BLU is there any way you can pull off a Mrs Doubtfire and order a great dinner - full menue delivered and pretend you cooked it?? Or maybe oprder bits and pieces of it like side dishes..
Cooking dinners was ALWAYS my downfall. I got so wasted one Thanksgiving, they ate the meal without me..That was a Very low point in my life.Didn't stop me though.
If you cant do that maybe get lots of other people to help you. Tell them you are under the weather. People love to help at parties. Gives them something to do! Keep us posted.
:l
Byrdlady;1351813 wrote: Dang BluBurd, that's rotten timing....all I can say is this, (and it's gotten me thru many a rough patch)....all I can worry about is this day. But you are smart to be thinking ahead...forwarned is forarmed. I trust your dinner meal isn't being cooked with wine?? Plan out what you will drink instead of _____. Get your excuse in place and come right out with it...one moment's hesitation can cost you. My excuse is that it has become like battery acid to my insides....but different things work for different folks. Plan that you are going to complete this party AF. Not if....It will be hard at first, but once you get over that little rough edge you will be great! If you are like me, having 4 days under your belt is too precious to lose!

If I had begun this journey telling myself that I'd never have another drink FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE (to be echo'd like in a canyon)...I'd have thrown my hands up and run out of the room. This journey is won in small victories....it's just like eating an elephant...you do it one bite at a time.

You can do it! B

I wish I was as talented as Robbin.
I think instead I will tell everyone I'm cooking an elephant and need lots of help! :chef:
My family is supportive that I am trying to go AF. Except that they will not be AF and_____ will be flowing all around me. Very easy to :sulk: for a drink. I do believe my will is stronger than that however, and yes 4 days will be feeling too great to lose. One day at a time, one bite at a time! I will update on day 1 tomorrow. Thank you both!

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

ButterBean! Your hat, my dear!!!!:day5: So proud of you! The better you feel the better you do! Well done, girl. B

[bluburd]

Newbies Nest

Congratulations Butterbean. Very inspiring to hear from success!

[LillyE]

Newbies Nest

Hi all,

I scarcely want to reference the previous ruffled feathers and misunderstandings in the Nest as it's great to see it calming down and the dust settling. I hope I haven't contributed to it unintentionally in any way. This should be a place of welcome and support and until recently it certainly has been for me.

I'm still going to step away from the Nest for now? It takes a lot of energy to support other Newbies and I feel like I'm in an essential transition stage right now - that is, finally, really trying to embrace total abstinence not should I-shouldn't I debate and I need to focus on that and be inspired by others who have some experience being successful at that. I hope that one day, when I've got more time under my belt, maybe I can be one of those fabulous old-timers like K9, Byrdie and Lav, who come here and support others - their input here is invaluable IMHO otherwise the Nest runs the risk of turning into a case of the blind leading the blind (though hopefully at least not blind drunk? boom!).

But I WILL let you know when I hit 30 days. Notice I said WHEN, not IF Speaking of, Kradle, YES, you were the first Boot Camper to my knowledge to hit the big 3-0. Woo woo! Anyone else? I'd feel dreadful if I was missing someone out there but I'm fairly certain. Well done lady. Keep it up!!!

Fin, if you're reading, it has been sad to see you drop off and hope you come back.

See you all around the boards kids. Love & strength.

Lilly

[finallydone]

Newbies Nest

I am not sure what to say anymore. I'll be back when I can. I love you all soo much but this going after each other is down right immature. I will defend K9 on this. So whatever. I came along today to be happy and I walked into nothing more than a stupid fight over basicaly immature crap. My God! I am a very caring and hard working American here who is sick and tired of watching little kids run down each other and act like whiny asses...It's grow up time kids. So if you think I'm here just to defend here guess what she will get me talking to her as well. It's time to grow up around here. We should all be ashamed of ourselves. Me included.

[finallydone]

Newbies Nest

finallydone;1351859 wrote: I am not sure what to say anymore. I'll be back when I can. I love you all soo much but this going after each other is down right immature. I will defend K9 on this. So whatever. I came along today to be happy and I walked into nothing more than a stupid fight over basicaly immature crap. My God! I am a very caring and hard working American here who is sick and tired of watching little kids run down each other and act like whiny asses...It's grow up time kids. So if you think I'm here just to defend here guess what she will get me talking to her as well. It's time to grow up around here. We should all be ashamed of ourselves. Me included.

One last thing. We should all be ashamed of ourselves today. All of us. For a pitful display when new people who need help need it. I am ashamed of myself. I am sickened right now on this whole thing. Take it for what it is.

[finallydone]

Newbies Nest

I should be happy...I just made 120 days right now today. But there is this thing bugging me. And I can't sleep. So I will just be honest. So don't debate on being a modder or being AL free...how about just being friends around here. Is it really that tough to do. In a year despite a relapse I have rebuild my life into something I feel damn proud of. I can look at myself in the mirror and go Wow I'm heading the right direction. I can will start my own business despite that my dumb gov't goes out if it's way to not promote it. If you want to see the sober Christian Thorson your getting him in full force around here. Why? Because I care about people and the newbies nest saved my life. I will however defend my friends. You have to take sides in life. And sometimes a side you have to take. The nest got me back going and K9 and mamabear got me going in the right direction. I owe my life to them. Nothing is more sweeter in life than my Sobriety. They are the reason a man headed to death is alive today. I don't take that lightly. So despite todays this or that. I owe my sanity and life to these two women who have been the most treasured souls I have ever met.

[Kradle123]

Newbies Nest

I couldn't sleep so Stirly (who is on Greece time!) helped me figure out how to post a Pic.
This is Madison with the first Catch of the Season...First time I crabbed without drinking.

Okay. I knwo I need to re-size :H

[bluburd]

Newbies Nest

Congratulations on the 120 days finally done! I cant even imagine that at this point (nor should I try), but it really means a lot to me to know you made it out of dire days, and have been able to keep going forward strong. If it takes any weight off your mind I feel very welcomed as a newbie here regardless of the ongoing arguments.

Awesome picture Kradle. That makes me really hungry! I love love love crab.

[finallydone]

Newbies Nest

bluburd;1351869 wrote: Congratulations on the 120 days finally done! I cant even imagine that at this point (nor should I try), but it really means a lot to me to know you made it out of dire days, and have been able to keep going forward strong. If it takes any weight off your mind I feel very welcomed as a newbie here regardless of the ongoing arguments.

Awesome picture Kradle. That makes me really hungry! I love love love crab.

You will get there. I didn't think i would either. and Kradle just keeps making me hungry.

[finallydone]

Newbies Nest

A day free from alcohol is a day free to live life.