Newbies Nest

[lifechange]

Newbies Nest

i'm very sorry for the loss of your sweet little dog, K9.

[itsmytime]

Newbies Nest

I can so relate Monique, I had 5 years sober and thought I could moderate. Now 6 years later I was drinking worse than I was the first time I quit. I am beating it again this time - on day 15 .

I want, need that peaceful feeling that sobriety brings with it.

[akaMonique]

Newbies Nest

itsmytime;1357339 wrote: I can so relate Monique, I had 5 years sober and thought I could moderate. Now 6 years later I was drinking worse than I was the first time I quit. I am beating it again this time - on day 15 .

I want, need that peaceful feeling that sobriety brings with it.

Good for you, itsmytime - it is your time! 15 days is fabulous. :wd:

Yes, mine definitely got worse over the 7 years and worse than what it was before I quit drinking in my twenties, when I was what was considered a "high bottom." From actual moderation to sometimes falling-down drunk to blackouts. From one bottle of wine a day to usually two at the end. Including drinking in the morning and nursing one during the day just to maintain. Ugh.

We all want to believe that we're different. But the truth is, it is progressive.

I was falling into old patterns and only checking in on this board one a week - too hard to keep up on everyone. So I'm keeping the window open and checking in more frequently. It helps to keep me accountable and reminds me what I have to deal with on a daily basis.

[pixie]

Newbies Nest

K9 - so sorry to hear about your Charlie. What a beautiful-looking dog he was. Try to think about all the happy memories you had with him.

Litre - Congrats on 30 days! On to the next 30!

Blu - You came back, that's the important thing. If you can figure out what the trigger was, and formulate a plan for the next time it comes up, you will be one step ahead.

I just finished reading "Drinking: A Love Story" by Caroline Knapp. She did an amazing job of describing the drinker's brain - it felt like she had shined a flashlight into my skull. I highly recommend it to anyone who hasn't read it, though there were parts where she described her cravings and how alcohol made her feel that were so spot on for me, that they were a little bit of a trigger, so be careful.

[akaMonique]

Newbies Nest

pixie;1357387 wrote:
I just finished reading "Drinking: A Love Story" by Caroline Knapp. She did an amazing job of describing the drinker's brain - it felt like she had shined a flashlight into my skull. I highly recommend it to anyone who hasn't read it, though there were parts where she described her cravings and how alcohol made her feel that were so spot on for me, that they were a little bit of a trigger, so be careful.

Pixie, I agree, that is an excellent book. Another one that resonated with me was a bestseller by Mary Karr, "Lit."

[bluburd]

Newbies Nest

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[akaMonique]

Newbies Nest

bluburd;1357440 wrote: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

?????????????????
What's up Bluburd?

[bluburd]

Newbies Nest

A hopeless feeling that wont go away

[bluburd]

Newbies Nest

angles and serpents dance

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Blu, Make the angels win. All you need to get your head back right is a couple days! Please hop back up and beat off that beast. There is NO future in the bottom of a glass...I looked and looked until I could see no longer. The only way to get this bastard out of your life is to cut off the food supply. It will continue to plague you as long as you drink. The agony will continue, so make this your Day 1 and tomorrow you will feel as tho you have really accomplished something. Or you can wake up with the G/S/R Brothers (Guilt/Shame/Remorse). Stay AF tonight no matter what and no matter who!!! Whatever it is won't go away with AL! Byrdie

[Pinecone]

Newbies Nest

K9, I'm so sorry for your loss. I've never thought it was fair that dogs who are such amazing companions for us have such short lifespans. I think it is great that you could be with him when he passed. Gotta go now, I got something in my eye...

[bluburd]

Newbies Nest

Thank you for the wise words.

Here is my reality:

Today will not be an alcohol free day. I am enslaved.
Beauty will come, but I will be in pain.
thank you endless for your remains
sometimes I realize Im just the same

Cheesey and etc.....

Im not quite grown up

[Cashregister]

Newbies Nest

I will get through this week without a drink...and then...cant project need one week at a time right now. Have not had one since Saturday ( now Tuesday morning ) and im just soooo tired, no cravings yet just oh so tired...will curl up tight in this lovely nest you have made. Hang in there everyone we can do it.

[akaMonique]

Newbies Nest

bluburd;1357506 wrote: Thank you for the wise words.

Here is my reality:

Today will not be an alcohol free day. I am enslaved.
Beauty will come, but I will be in pain.
thank you endless for your remains
sometimes I realize Im just the same

Cheesey and etc.....

Im not quite grown up

Not cheesey. I'm not sure I ever really grew up - they say your growth is suspended from when you first start drinking. That's why I often still feel like I'm 14 I guess.

Thank you for your honesty. Let us know how you're doing tomorrow.

[akaMonique]

Newbies Nest

CashRegister - we wear ourselves out with our drinking, planning our drinking, recovering from our drinking, thinking about our drinking - so no wonder we're exhausted if we stop. Be kind to yourself. Good luck with the week. Think about how good you'll feel next week when you look back on your success. You'll start feeling better soon, too.

Take care nesters. Probably good night for me.