Newbies Nest

[Cashregister]

Newbies Nest

Thank you so much xxx

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

Haven't checked in here for a few days so I just wanted to welcome all the Newbies!

K9, I am so sorry about Charlie, it's hard to let them go:l
It's been 10 months since I lost 'Girl Dog' so I know how it feels. 'Matilda' has helped me move along quite a bit. Maybe there's a new puppy looking for you at some point too

Lav

[LillyE]

Newbies Nest

Hey Brydie,

So, WHERE IS MY HAT?

Because, dingdingdingding, TODAY IS DAY 30!

I know I've been absent from the Nest for awhile, because I reached a point I was finding it too hard to be reading about people slipping a lot - and then the whole moderation debate blew up temporarily and that was just too challenging for me to deal with at the time too, but I do drop in and read here and think of you all. And I am so grateful for the help the Nest has given me in getting as far as I have.

I particularly want to say thanks to the old-timers, Brydie, K9, Lolab, Sausage, Lav, Finally Done, Monique, who give their advice and support here. It's so essential for those just finding their feet. THANK YOU from the bottom of my heart for your wisdom and generosity in sharing. You are all shining lights here.

I can't quite believe it's taken me an entire year of trying to get to 30 days. It seems like such a relatively short space of time but it's been a monumental struggle to get this far. Now, I'm not encouraging relapsing or slipping - on the contrary, I really wish I'd just dug my heels in and committed fully much sooner. However, it took that year of reading, learning and sharing to reach a place of acceptance.

And now, I need to find a way to push forward to new levels of commitment. I've had some slippery thinking creeping in the last few days and it has worried/scared me. But I'm glad I can spot it for what it is and am taking steps to counteract it.

For those still struggling to string days together, 30 FEELS WORTH IT - even though it has taken a year to get here.

At 30 days sober…

I feel calmer, happier, more positive, less anxious, less depressed.

I am sleeping better and my allergies are, not gone, but much better. My digestion is also hugely improved.

I have been working out and eating healthily and, as a result, have lost over 2.5 kilos and can see signs my fitness is steadily improving. My complexion looks clearer. A friend told me yesterday that my face shape has changed and my skin is "glowing".

I have spent sooo much less money and saved money. I've put $100 a week aside each week I haven't drunk into a special account (including the month of June in which I only drunk on two nights) with which I've saved enough to buy myself an iPad and treat myself to a special dinner outu Friday with $200 in the account still awaiting another treat…

I feel more present with my friends without booze getting in the way. I have had the time and energy to do good things for people I love this month that I might not have got around to if I were drinking and/or hungover.

I feel proud of myself for tackling this!

I feel more focused on the future, not just bogged down in present drinking misery/worry/anxiety.

I am setting new goals for myself.

I am learning HUGE amounts about myself and this addiction. Sometimes it's painful but mostly it's great and way better than the dark fog of denial.

I haven't had a hangover in 29 days. Priceless.

[LillyE]

Newbies Nest

Just reading back a bit as I've been a bit out of the loop just lately. Sorry if I've missed any other huge news?

Litre, CONGRATULATIONS on your 30 days! Great feeling isn't it? Wonderful to hear you sounding so much more upbeat and positive. Compare that with your very first posts here. Now, if that isn't living proof that the struggle is indeed worth it, what is? YAY for you my 30 Day buddy!

((((((((K9)))))))) So sorry to hear about Charlie. Much love and condolences your way? :h

[Litre2]

Newbies Nest

Yea Lav, My Dixie will never replace Reena, but I know Reena would have loved her like I do. She really does fill that void. K9 keep strong, the next few days will be tough without Charlie. My little Spaniel is black and white with spots. My grandson said she looked like a fire dog.

Blu-It is difficult to find the right words to help you through this rough patch, but I know you can do it. It may not be tomorrow, or it just might be. Set a day in your mind and work with it. We all tripped, and really fought to find our way back. Keep fighting, you are stronger than that beast, you have one power the beast does not. That is the capacity to think and judge. So you can out think that thing and win.

Its-Way to go on 15 Days

There was a discussion about drinking more after we have been AF for a period of time. I forgot who mentioned it, sorry. It is so true. When I stopped drinking for 3 months and started back, I was not drinking very much. Not even thinking of moderation. I was simply trying to drown out a miserable person. It got worse and I finally left. I then stopped for 1 month, then the drinking really began. I can honestly say it was 24-7. I had a glass beside me at all times. I would wake in the middle of the nite, instead of water, yea there was the wine. Instead of coffee, you guessed it, wine. Sometimes I would grab a light beer, thinking it would reduce the AL intake, but I still went back to the wine. Even when I was in the hospital, I was out on weekends. I would get my crutch. I got to the point where I was tired of myself and how I always felt so crappy, not to mention looking crappy. Taking care of myself was a chore, like showering or putting makeup on, doing my hair was pulling a brush through it. Well one day I woke up and decided to start my journey to being sober during the long weekend. What a time to quit. When I quit for 3 months it was on St. Paddy's Day.
Now 30 days later, a very clear head and a love of life here I am now working on my next 30 days.
So all my nester friends the journey is well worth it. There are many turns, crossroads , sinkholes and bumps in the dark we are afraid of, but if we keep our minds open and our will sharp, we can and will make that journey count.
Here is a big hug for all my friends who are finding the challenge more than they can tolerate, you can do it.

[Litre2]

Newbies Nest

Lilly- congrats 30 days for you also. Wow. Since you took a small leave I forgot we started on the same day, I am so sorry. I will remember now.
I love what you put down about how you feel. It is so right, the world looks so different and beautiful through sober eyes.
I also treated myself. I bought an ID braclet and had my nails done. I had them work with my own nails and put acrylic ones on. I cannot think at the moment, not sure if it is the brain cells not quite working or the fact it is late. Or it could be the cough medicine the Dr put me on. But what ever it is, and whether I can think of a word or not, I do not get as frustrated as I used to. It just came to me, I had my nails Shellaked, never did get an A in spelling.

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

CONGRATS on 30 AF days Lilly & Litre!!
Keep going ladies, you'll never be sorry

[finallydone]

Newbies Nest

Litre2;1357543 wrote: Yea Lav, My Dixie will never replace Reena, but I know Reena would have loved her like I do. She really does fill that void. K9 keep strong, the next few days will be tough without Charlie. My little Spaniel is black and white with spots. My grandson said she looked like a fire dog.

Blu-It is difficult to find the right words to help you through this rough patch, but I know you can do it. It may not be tomorrow, or it just might be. Set a day in your mind and work with it. We all tripped, and really fought to find our way back. Keep fighting, you are stronger than that beast, you have one power the beast does not. That is the capacity to think and judge. So you can out think that thing and win.

Its-Way to go on 15 Days

There was a discussion about drinking more after we have been AF for a period of time. I forgot who mentioned it, sorry. It is so true. When I stopped drinking for 3 months and started back, I was not drinking very much. Not even thinking of moderation. I was simply trying to drown out a miserable person. It got worse and I finally left. I then stopped for 1 month, then the drinking really began. I can honestly say it was 24-7. I had a glass beside me at all times. I would wake in the middle of the nite, instead of water, yea there was the wine. Instead of coffee, you guessed it, wine. Sometimes I would grab a light beer, thinking it would reduce the AL intake, but I still went back to the wine. Even when I was in the hospital, I was out on weekends. I would get my crutch. I got to the point where I was tired of myself and how I always felt so crappy, not to mention looking crappy. Taking care of myself was a chore, like showering or putting makeup on, doing my hair was pulling a brush through it. Well one day I woke up and decided to start my journey to being sober during the long weekend. What a time to quit. When I quit for 3 months it was on St. Paddy's Day.
Now 30 days later, a very clear head and a love of life here I am now working on my next 30 days.
So all my nester friends the journey is well worth it. There are many turns, crossroads , sinkholes and bumps in the dark we are afraid of, but if we keep our minds open and our will sharp, we can and will make that journey count.
Here is a big hug for all my friends who are finding the challenge more than they can tolerate, you can do it.

30 days!!!!!!!!!!!!! :goodjob:

[finallydone]

Newbies Nest

LillyE;1357539 wrote: Hey Brydie,

So, WHERE IS MY HAT?

Because, dingdingdingding, TODAY IS DAY 30!

I know I've been absent from the Nest for awhile, because I reached a point I was finding it too hard to be reading about people slipping a lot - and then the whole moderation debate blew up temporarily and that was just too challenging for me to deal with at the time too, but I do drop in and read here and think of you all. And I am so grateful for the help the Nest has given me in getting as far as I have.

I particularly want to say thanks to the old-timers, Brydie, K9, Lolab, Sausage, Lav, Finally Done, Monique, who give their advice and support here. It's so essential for those just finding their feet. THANK YOU from the bottom of my heart for your wisdom and generosity in sharing. You are all shining lights here.

I can't quite believe it's taken me an entire year of trying to get to 30 days. It seems like such a relatively short space of time but it's been a monumental struggle to get this far. Now, I'm not encouraging relapsing or slipping - on the contrary, I really wish I'd just dug my heels in and committed fully much sooner. However, it took that year of reading, learning and sharing to reach a place of acceptance.

And now, I need to find a way to push forward to new levels of commitment. I've had some slippery thinking creeping in the last few days and it has worried/scared me. But I'm glad I can spot it for what it is and am taking steps to counteract it.

For those still struggling to string days together, 30 FEELS WORTH IT - even though it has taken a year to get here.

At 30 days sober?

I feel calmer, happier, more positive, less anxious, less depressed.

I am sleeping better and my allergies are, not gone, but much better. My digestion is also hugely improved.

I have been working out and eating healthily and, as a result, have lost over 2.5 kilos and can see signs my fitness is steadily improving. My complexion looks clearer. A friend told me yesterday that my face shape has changed and my skin is "glowing".

I have spent sooo much less money and saved money. I've put $100 a week aside each week I haven't drunk into a special account (including the month of June in which I only drunk on two nights) with which I've saved enough to buy myself an iPad and treat myself to a special dinner outu Friday with $200 in the account still awaiting another treat?

I feel more present with my friends without booze getting in the way. I have had the time and energy to do good things for people I love this month that I might not have got around to if I were drinking and/or hungover.

I feel proud of myself for tackling this!

I feel more focused on the future, not just bogged down in present drinking misery/worry/anxiety.

I am setting new goals for myself.

I am learning HUGE amounts about myself and this addiction. Sometimes it's painful but mostly it's great and way better than the dark fog of denial.

I haven't had a hangover in 29 days. Priceless.

Thirty DAYS!! Great job!! And wow...you said it all there! :goodjob:

[finallydone]

Newbies Nest

K9.............. My dear friend, I am soo sorry to hear about charlie. It still hurts me inside when as a teenager I had to watch our family dog die right in front of us. He was the dog we got when I was 5 years old. It tears your heart apart when a pet becomes part of the family and you love being around them and take care of them. I will always miss how our dog who's name was Brandy would come up to me and lick my face and would love going out fishing with me. It's something I will never forget. I sometimes think about him and get a lump in my throat. But part of life is sometimes things you love the most go away from you. I know you will feel better over the next few days. And a loss in life is never easy to handle. I feel sad inside you lost Charlie but he know up in heaven having fun and playing around. Take care my friend and I am feeling sad inside for your loss. :h

[WickedMom]

Newbies Nest

Monique and Itsmytime, just wanted to say that your conversation about falling back into the trap after so many years of sobriety is extremely helpful in a very scary way. I admit that I?m terrified of that happening to me. I can?t imagine drinking any worse than I was when I quit just over 10 months ago. I don?t think my body (or my family and friends) could put up with that. I doubt I would survive. So thanks for reminding me that a few months of AF time is not a cure. Whenever I get an urge to have ?just one? I will remember that it could (and most likely would) lead to many many more and right back to a miserable way of life.

K9, sorry to hear about your dog. It?s always so sad to lose a pet. Hope you feel better soon!

Goodnight All!

[Kradle123]

Newbies Nest

Just read about your loss K9. So sorry. He is such a cutie in his photo. We lost Norman not to long ago . Incredibly hard. :h

Sending you peace &
Hugs,

:l

[nellie78]

Newbies Nest

Hi everyone

I'm back on here after having my third and last baby three months ago. Already the vino is getting out of hand and I have realised I cannot drink moderately. I have tried on and off for years now to moderate my intake but I just can't do it. I can go alcohol free no problems Sunday-Thursday but then have a massive blowout over the weekend and it takes until Tuesday to feel normal again. That's it, I've had enough and I have decided to quit completely. Today is day one and I have a hen do this weekend. I am determined and know I can do it as long as I'm 110% committed. My strategy is going to be to simply post on here everyday and not touch a drop. It's no big deal, it's only a flipping glass of wine for God's sake and I'm a grown woman choosing a healthier way of life. I will not be beaten!!!!

[mauritiusdodo]

Newbies Nest

K9Lover;1357150 wrote: My beloved Cocker Spaniel, Charlie, passed away at 3:30am on Sunday. I think he was having a series of little strokes. He lost control of his body and was unable to stand or walk. I held him for hours. I talked to him and sang to him. He took his last breath at 3:30am in my arms.

Sleep well, my sweet, sweet boy.

So sorry to hear your sad news, sending you :l losing a pet is just awful :l

[itsmytime]

Newbies Nest

:wd: WOOHOO Lilly and Litre on 30 days!!

I am back to work this week, so checking in quickly before heading out for the day. Feeling good and getting my eating back on track as I allowed myself to eat whatever, whenever I wanted last week. It was my first totally sober week off work in 6 years!!! I am very proud of that. If I can do that - home alone is a huge trigger - I can make it!!

Have a great day all!!