Newbies Nest

[K9Lover]

Newbies Nest

Happy Monday Nesters!

Oneredshoe - Welcome to the Nest. I can relate to your experience. I was at the point where I was blacking out nearly every night, and doing lord-knows-what during those blackouts. I'd spend half of he next day trying to piece together the night before...checking the phone, email...looking at the car to determine if I went anywhere...UGH. I finally got to the point where I just couldn't take it anymore. It became harder to drink than to not drink. I'm glad you've found us. Read a lot and post a lot too....you're in a great place. Remember, you CAN quit if you want to, and we can help!

Hi Stella (yes, Stella gets a shout out!), Lav, Byrdie, Boozer, PF, Stumpy, FD, Allan, Kradle and everyone else...I know I've missed many, but me pea brain can only remember so much...plus I'm pushing 40 so it's bound to get worse. LOL

I had TWO major craving this weekend, not for booze but for cigarettes. I rode them out, thinking how I don't want to have any more day ONEs....so I am happy to report that I am 15 days, 1 hour and 14 minute smoke free! Plus, I know how I am...if I would have bought a pack, I would have smoked the whole pack...and I do NOT want to do that! Thoughts are just thoughts and we CAN ride them out....

Ok everyone, guess I better get to work...ugh. Everyone stick tight to the nest...glue, velcroe or tape your butts in!

xoxo
K9

[Fin]

Newbies Nest

Boot Camp Redux

Back again giving it another shot. It's great to see so many of you racking up the AF days. I'm inspired again to get through the month and beyond. Last record was 14 days. Here we go again..

Hope all is well with you fine people. All the best...

[K9Lover]

Newbies Nest

You can do it Fin! You only really lose when you quit trying...and I'm glad to see you haven't. Pick yourself up, brush yourself off and start working towards your goals. You can do this and we can help!

Glad to see you back!!

K9

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Fin, great to see you again. What happened between boot camp and today? What brought you back around? It helps everyone to know that we aren't alone...
We miss your enthusiasm and I've even started using paragraph breaks!! (well, most of the time!). So glad you are back with us! Byrdie

[Fin]

Newbies Nest

K9Lover;1376301 wrote: You can do it Fin! You only really lose when you quit trying...and I'm glad to see you haven't. Pick yourself up, brush yourself off and start working towards your goals. You can do this and we can help!

Glad to see you back!!

K9

Thanks, K9 and Oneredshoe...whoa, just read your post. Keep your head up. This will all pass, but it starts with getting honest with at least ourselves, right? We've all done horribly foolish shit when we drink. If nothing else, know you're not alone.

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Oneredshoe....welcome to our place...as you can see we have lots of success here! Settle in with us....there isn't a single story you can't share ....we can identify with all! Fin is so right, we've all done really STUPID stuff and AL is to blame. Now we know better....when you know better, you do better....and so it goes. We are glad you're here! Byrdie

[allankay]

Newbies Nest

I feel real bad for Onereadshoe, this is what alcohol does to us, turns us into someone really different. I have been there, making out with people I didnt even remember the next day. The worst for me was doing it with some one from work. And then akward months that followed... I wish there was a piece of advice I could give or anyone else could offer but its a tough situation to be in. The best word of advice I can giv you, is to take your time. This feeling of anxiety passes, you become calmer and may be then you will figure out the best course of action.

ALLAN

[Fin]

Newbies Nest

Byrdie! Love the paragraph breaks and removing quotes for Roll Call. I'll get back on that. As far as what brought me back around, it's another admission that I'm stuck. I was doing really well after 14 days completely clean -- moderating, etc. Then about a month ago, for whatever reason, I slipped right back into the old habit of hitting the IPAs way too hard every night after work (and on weekends).

It's no mystery why I drink the things. They take the edge off of the transition from work to home where I have two kids and a wife. Often the kids are wound up, wife is tiered and short on patience and I'm like, WTF? I want to relax after a long day! Pop the IPA and instantly, I'm right there with the kids, more patient and more loving toward my wife. The problem is that I wake up every single morning so pissed off that I drank the way I did the night before. I feel horrible physically and am weighing heavy with guilt.

You wouldn?t know it from my avatar alias, I'm a very athletic individual and always have been so these stupid hangovers just don't fit with who I am or the image I have of myself. What the avatar does depict is my love for bluegrass, but these IPAs are also hurting my development as a musician. I practice mandolin every morning which is when I?m hurting most -- full of shame which is killing me inside. This is NOT me, nor is it sustainable behavior so here I am again giving it my best shot one the shoulders of all you giants out there who continue to keep at it.

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Fin, your 14 days were fantastic. Here's to new beginnings.

I know exactly what you mean by drinking as a transition from work to home. I work FROM home, so that 5 o'clock hour was really a shift change for me. Until it became 4 o'clock, and finally there at the end 2:30. Enough is enough. I hate AL. It took a perfectly nice girl and made her into an out-of-control bitch/zombie. Mosty zombie. The times I was awake and sober, I was thinking of drinking....everything was centered around drinking! This is NO way to live, and a darn good way to die. I think that by the time a person comes here, he/she is waking up to that fact. Help is on the way! Hugs, Byrdie

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Welcome back Fin!

You fell for the same old thing we've all fallen for at one time or another......
The addicted brain will tell us over & over that we are in control & we can handle AL. Obviously we can not. The thing that finally helped me was accepting that drinking AL was no longer an option for me. Best choice I've ever made, it's no longer an issue for me & for that I am grateful
Stick with us, go to the Tool box & choose anything you can find to help you relax after work instead of picking up that first drink!

I am really, really enjoying this nice weather. So is Stella & all of her feathered friends :H

[Fin]

Newbies Nest

Back in the saddle

Wow, thanks again you guys. I really appreciate the "welcomings" back. As you can imagine, the thoughts of my nightly IPAs has already started to creep back into my mind as in, "I'll just have a couple and call it good." Bullshit. See you here tomorrow, same place, same time with the ticker incremented by 1 more day AF.

[Prairie Fairy]

Newbies Nest

Hey Fin - pull out the L-Glut, the Kudzu and buckle up the nest straps... We will hang with you

[Fin]

Newbies Nest

Prairie Fairy;1376385 wrote: Hey Fin - pull out the L-Glut, the Kudzu and buckle up the nest straps... We will hang with you

Awesome. My placebo is a soda stream machine. I can carbonate the heck out of filtered tap water, pour that over ice and a little bit of cranberry juice and man, it fills me up like beer.

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

That sounds like a good drink Fin.
My brother also plays a mandolin believe it or not
Hang in there & let those AF days pile up!

Still a bit quiet around the Nest today, hope everyone is OK.
Wishing a safe night for one & all!
Lav

[Pinecone]

Newbies Nest

Hey Fin, welcome back! Being honest about our problem is hard work. I used to drink at home, like you describe to "take the edge off." After being sober for a while, I am realizing now that alcohol put the edge on in the first place! I am so much more mellow and relaxed, so much more of the time now. I'm happy for you because you sound so determined, and there are so many beautiful things coming your way if you stick with it.

Hi to all my friends and teachers here: Lav, Byrdie, Lolab, K9 and others!