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    Newbies Nest

    Fin, I totally agree...about the looking people in the eye. Love your avatar.

    Allan- I'm sending all the positive energy that I have - your way today!

    Byrdie - yet another stellar post. Did Rob at least buy you LUNCH in that dream???
    ~

    Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.

    Sobriety date: Sept 26, 2011

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      Newbies Nest

      Fin...my heart is bursting with happiness for you. You have made it over your sticking point...you and I are both in uncharted water...and ain't it great!!! Well done to you for coming back and participating and helping us all understand what this addiction does to us and our families...we don't just do it to ourselves...it's like a ripple on a pond...it's felt all around many layers deep. Well done! B
      All you gotta do, is get thru this day. AF 1/20/2011
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        Newbies Nest

        Today is day 1 for me....

        It's 6:49 am here in sunny ca. My hands are shaky but I'm in the medical field so I know how to avoid getting DTs and seizures. A big step for me!!! Haven't had any AF days in many, many years!
        Alcoholic (or Ally)

        "Only a fool knows everything.
        A wise man knows how little he knows."

        Please feel free to block/ignore my posts through your control panel.

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          Newbies Nest

          Welcome to the nest Alcoholic!! Catchy name!!! Please settle in with us...read back a couple of weeks and see who we are....we have many folks on Day 1 just like you....please post, post. post! Whatever you are thinking, someone else is, too and just doens't know how to verbalize it. Don't ask me why, but getting it out of yourself and onto 'paper' really helps....it structures it somehow...helps you get a plan. We are so glad you have joined us, as you can see, we have LOTS of success here! This place saves lives....and I'm one of them! B
          All you gotta do, is get thru this day. AF 1/20/2011
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            Newbies Nest

            hi byrdlady and alcoholic
            alcoholic i am on day 1 today so your not alone as byrdlady says this site is amazing and i am being totally honest with myself about drinking for the first time because i can talk unconditionally here without judgement. i felt a release once i realised i had a problem and now i know i have to change my life, habits, behaviours and thoughts. i am going to take it day by day and hope i can succeed to be a happier me on the inside and out.

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              Newbies Nest

              Byrdie: thank you yet again for your ingenious post! You always seem to know the right things to say. As soon as I finish posting this I will be spilling out the last couple of beers and the 1/4 bottle that I have left of vodka. Won't be easy but I know I have to do it. As soon as that first drink hit my lips yesterday I knew I was in for it yet I continued on with it. I now have no recollection of going to bed, I am sick to my stomach, I have severe GERD, and my head feels foggy. I absolutely despise this feeling and I'm ready to never feel like this again! :upset:

              Alcoholic: Like many others on this site I have had my fair share of day 1's. I accept that fact and am now ready to change that to day 2's and 3's and so on. I'm proud of you for taking the first step in admitting you have a problem and coming to this site for the support you need to kick this nasty addiction. If you get a nasty craving come post about it here and the wise members will help you through it. Everyone on this site is amazing and it feels good to know that not only are you the only one with this demon but you don't have to face this alone. It is inspiring to see the members that have years sober behind them. It helps me realize that if they can do it, so can I. I've only been a member for a couple of days but I feel like these people are my friends because I feel that I can share anything without anyone passing judgement on me. So good luck and god speed! You can do this!:l
              One day at a time, no matter how many times I fail, I will get this monkey off of my back!!! :confusedmonkey:

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                Newbies Nest

                Lola...Robert Redford was ABOUT to buy me lunch and then I woke up!!! DAMMITALL! B
                All you gotta do, is get thru this day. AF 1/20/2011
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                  Newbies Nest

                  lolab;1392671 wrote: forgot to say that in my "previous" life - even this would have been a reason to drink....having a cold.

                  I would have convinced myself that the alcohol would calm my cough - or has some antiseptic quality or something....and mostly - nobody will get close enough to me to smell anything - so why not? And I'm low on energy already - so why not? I'd take every bit of the little energy I have, to get myself cleaned up to go buy some, and lay around and drink. And the oddest part is that I feel so crappy that something about it even now seems just a little bit appealing to me.

                  No, I'm not going there - just wanted everybody to know that having those thoughts is normal - and you'll occasionally have them for a long while - but AF time gives you the opportunity to learn how to turn them off.....to look at those thoughts and say WTF?
                  Hi Lolab,

                  I've had exactly the same pattern, only all I would need to drink with a cold would be "it will make me feel better, and then I will fall asleep."

                  Cat
                  "It is easier to maintain than to start from the bottom again. I can't go back there." Byrdie

                  AF since Oct 2, 2012

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                    Newbies Nest

                    What is PAWS?

                    nurdl;1392674 wrote: Kuya, thanks for all your info on supplements. I'm on day 40, oh hey... 40 days cool. I think I'm getting episodes of PAWS. Very tired, fluish, achey, but the thing that's making me crazy is the random muscle spasms. Any suggestsions? I'll have to try the Glutamine at night too. I need some sort of boost at the end of the day.

                    be well, love your devilish avatar
                    nurdl
                    Could someone explain what is PAWS? Nurdl, it sounds awful. Sorry you are feeling this way.

                    I googled "PAWS" but not sure I found the right result.

                    Catbuddy
                    "It is easier to maintain than to start from the bottom again. I can't go back there." Byrdie

                    AF since Oct 2, 2012

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                      Newbies Nest

                      Hey Cat - “I’ve been clean for a while, why do I still feel dodgy?” A must read! - Member Blog - Wired In

                      Why We Don’t Get Better Immediately: Post-acute Withdrawal Syndrome (PAWS) | What…Me Sober?

                      A couple of articles that have been previously linked to that give info on Post Acute Withdrawal Symptoms. symptoms that can occur for quite a long time after going AF.
                      ~

                      Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.

                      Sobriety date: Sept 26, 2011

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                        Newbies Nest

                        :goodluck:
                        Fin;1392701 wrote: I swear, one of the coolest things I'm observing in myself and others being 100% clean is a stronger sense of confidence mixed with sensitivity. For example, I find myself looking more people squarily in the eye with an open heart when I communicate.
                        This is amazin, Fin. We are having the same experiences, my Day 14 buddy. I was hiking yesterday, came across a couple on a very narrow trail, and as we jostled by each other, I greeted each of them, looked them in the eye, and smiled.

                        WOW. WOW. WOW. Two weeks ago, I would duck my head when I passed mirrors. I could not look at my swollen face, my desperate eyes, much less look at someone else.

                        CONFIDENCE. I didn't expect this as an AF gift. Go for it Allan. Go for it ODAT (who also has interviews coming up).

                        :goodluck:

                        Catbuddy
                        "It is easier to maintain than to start from the bottom again. I can't go back there." Byrdie

                        AF since Oct 2, 2012

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                          Newbies Nest

                          Thank you, byrdlady, iama, hitting 40, and everyone!

                          I'm a 1-2 bottle a day wine drinker. I'll be staying sober just for my health.

                          Good to know so many day 1 people out there. Who else out there is starting day 1 today?! Of you are a reader and not a subscriber, register and join us w this journey together!!!

                          Alcoholic--
                          Alcoholic (or Ally)

                          "Only a fool knows everything.
                          A wise man knows how little he knows."

                          Please feel free to block/ignore my posts through your control panel.

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                            Newbies Nest

                            Thanks for the kind wishes everyone. I just had the initial interview. I think it went pretty well. So tomorrow I am going to have round two with a more senior manager. If that goes well I was told that I would need to come in again on Thursday to meet with a specialist to asses my knowledge. AH??? Thats 3 interviews in one week? What happened to the good old, "it was good to meet you, and can you start tomorrow?"

                            I applied to Bloomberg once there were 5 stages... I got to number 4 WTF!!! I am not applying for a CEO position. They probably get away with a job after a brief chat over drinks. No wonder corporate world is falling apart.

                            Sorry for the rant.

                            ALLAN
                            AF since 1st Sep 2012
                            NF since 1st Sep 2012

                            If you want to feel better visit www.hopeforpaws.org

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                              Newbies Nest

                              I'm back in. Day 2. Horrible Sat where I embarrassed my whole family - pretending I wasn't drunk - I was hammered. I think they look at at me and just shake their head. Why is it when you are drunk you think you aren't?? Top it off - it was my son's birthday. Arrghhhh....

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                                Newbies Nest

                                Welcome sharky, long time no see, I'm on day 2 also.
                                ALL I HAVE TO DO IS GET THOUGH THIS DAY AF

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