Newbies Nest

[iamaquitter28]

Newbies Nest

Sharky: I'm sorry to hear that. I've had many of those times when you wake up the next day completely embarrassed by your actions the night before. I always swear that I am more sober than I actually am. I mean, who can possibly be sober after a half gallon of vodka??? But that devil monkey in your head will tell you anything he can to get you to have that next drink! You fell off the horse, now just get back up and ride!!! :-)

[Fin]

Newbies Nest

Yep, uncharted territory, Byrd! I loved your ripple analogy. So true. Coincidentally my drift boat's name is FinRipple. It's a boat I built about ten years ago that my family and I use to float many of the West's major rivers. From here, her ripples will be positive ones.

Here she is on the Green River:



Cat, your trail story is so cool. I'm also noticing it at my local coffee shop. It's like this mini human connection that feels meaningful and memorable. I've always been pretty outgoing, but not without help if you know what I mean, so this is all kinda of new.

Loab - thanks for you're note too and foor those on Day 1, or stumbling a bit know it's part of the process. I've tripped up plenty of times, but somehow feel more committed this time around. Keep at it. There be really good stuff out there.

Be good,
-Fin

[hitting40]

Newbies Nest

hi sharkey - i am on day 1 so we are starting out - try to put that behind you and move forward thats what i am trying to do, as i said earlier i am going to log in here every evening to catch up and see what everyone is up to, it gives me great comfort to know i am not alone.

[Sharky]

Newbies Nest

Thanks all. There is great comfort in reading and trying to get through the struggles.
Hittin40 - Good luck w/Day 1 as well
Quitter28 - Jumping on that horse!!
odat1234 - sent sent you a pm
Let's do it!

[Fin]

Newbies Nest

Sharky;1392776 wrote: Thanks all. There is great comfort in reading and trying to get through the struggles.
Hittin40 - Good luck w/Day 1 as well
Quitter28 - Jumping on that horse!!
odat1234 - sent sent you a pm
Let's do it!

You boys/girls? need to hit Roll Call -- See the below for instructions if you haven't already. My goal is to have 20 on board by Friday. We're 14 now. Come on aboard. It's a good trip.

[Dogwood Blossom]

Newbies Nest

Almost Free, I was thinking today about what you posted yesterday, about how you watch people and wonder how they feel and how you wonder if they know how lucky they are. Well, no, they probably don't know how lucky they are from the addiction perspective! I do the same thing. I wonder why we can't be normal.

Today, I'm going to think of us as being blessed. A lot of times, because of our alcohol dependence, life just blows by us. When I'm in a heavy drinking cycle, the whole world just seems dark and gloomy. Everything feels so sad, like I'm seeing things through a dark vale. BUT, there are times when I can put a few days together AF and after a few of those, the vale lifts, the sun comes out and I actually get a sense of what it is to be happy again! I wish I was one of those who doesn't know how lucky they are, but I also feel so blessed because I know just how good it is, when it is!

I just want to hang on and get to that time when my thinking doesn't totally revolve around alcohol. When I can actually care about the people I love and be there for them. I've learned the hard way that even with 20 years sober, you still have to be alert and aware of the snares of alcohol, but since I was there once, I have to believe that whatever we have to go through to get to sober, it is worth it!

[Dottie Belle]

Newbies Nest

Afternoon all,
Day 15 and finally feeling pretty darn good....got myself a little portable CD/Cassette player yesterday that plugs into the electric so I can let it run with the hypnosis and sleep CD's..maybe that helped...but i did wake up with a horrible headache.
Busy day with lots of appointments so I will check back later...
This sure is a busy place and sometimes hard to keep up but I do read all the posts eventually.
Dottie

[Kradle123]

Newbies Nest

Sharky;1392761 wrote: I'm back in. Day 2. Horrible Sat where I embarrassed my whole family - pretending I wasn't drunk - I was hammered. I think they look at at me and just shake their head. Why is it when you are drunk you think you aren't?? Top it off - it was my son's birthday. Arrghhhh....

Sharky:

I am sooooooo there with you! I would swear up down and six ways from Sunday that I was pretty Sober and actually be proud at first that I could drink that much and be fine and then as evening wore on and it hit me, scared that I could drink that much and think I was fine. How fucked up is that... ?

Sometimes I'd even wake up the next morning and be so blocked off in my head that I had to belive it wasn't that bad. I was really Okay and it was my husband who was an Ass and I was just reacting to him...though to come clear I still think he can be an ass now that i'm not drinking

I missed an entire Thanksgiving meal once that I had cooked for heaven's sake!! I really can't explain it either except perhaps we've been doing this for so long, it seems more natural than when we're not drinking as though the words 'high' and buzzed' almost loose their meaning because it's a completely natural, comfortable state for us.

That's the nearest I can figure.

Now, sans AL for almost 5 months, i'm not entirely at a Carol King 'You make me feel like a natural Woman' stage yet, but not turning to AL during stress or even after 5PM isn't as tough as it was in the begining.. well, almost.

Hugs
:l

[Dogwood Blossom]

Newbies Nest

Hey Sharkey...Day 3 for me, so let's do this! Let's grab Ima, Odat, H40, Alcoholic & anyone else who wants to take this journey! Good group to journey together.

Way to go on Day 15 Dottie!

[Starfish1]

Newbies Nest

Almost noon here, friends-

And today is tough for me so far! This is day 15 and except for the first few days of my quit, things have been going very well. I have had a few cravings, but nothing I couldn?t just overcome.

Today is different. I am not sure what it is. The day did not start off very smoothly for one thing. The DH was involved in that! Then we had to go rent a car for me to use because my vehicle will be in the shop this week, due to a minor ?fender bender? that occurred a couple of weeks ago. (BTW- I was in no way, shape or fashion involved in that fender bender and am SO GLAD I was not).

Anyhow, just renting the car was stressful. I also have a project at work that I am NOT enjoying and need to finish up TODAY! And I have an errand to run after work, which I am not looking forward to.

Sixteen days ago, I definitely would have been thinking about drinking my LUNCH (and the term LUNCH is meant in the traditional sense)

In fact, today, I have been thinking about drinking my lunch. A LOT!

But that is not possible. Because- I am driving a rental car (and the last thing I need is to drive under the influence), I have committed to stop drinking, I have a nest full of supporters who are holding me up, I am a big girl and need to finish this work project, I have a daughter who is depending on a sober mom to run this errand with her after work. I have 15 (well 14 ? sober days) and if I start drinking again, I will fall down the rabbit hole AGAIN!

NO, HELL NO AL!

I got to turn this day around- and I will!

Thanks for listening and thanks for everyone?s hard work. I love you all and am so proud of you.
I think I?ll just go eat my LUNCH! I may just ?pretend? I am eating it with Robbie boy, though!

:h Star

[iamaquitter28]

Newbies Nest

Dogwood: I'm all in! Let the journey begin!!!! :thumbs:

[Sharky]

Newbies Nest

Dogwood- All in. Let's go! Kradle123 - you are so right. My thought pattern exactly. I think I'm fooling everyone that I'm sober - when they know full well I'm not. My kids are pointing it out which really breaks my heart. Gotta stop!!

More the merrier!

[Dogwood Blossom]

Newbies Nest

:yougo:Starfish...you hang on! You can do this! If you want to see Day 15, you just don't drink! Break this day down and do one chore and one moment at a time. You have already listed some very important reasons to NOT drink! Think how good it will feel to face your daughter sober! All the things your heart truly desires are possible if you don't drink! We are all here, cheering you on! YOU CAN DO IT! If 14 1/2 days was good, then 15 has to be awesome!

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Star!! Step away from my Robert Redford dream! He's MINE....or at least he was about to be....

This feeling you are having is a normal progression from 2 weeks till you get your hat. Your emotions will be all over the place...from being ready to down a box of wine, to 'yes, I can do this'....you will be bouncier than one of Lav's Chickens...you will also be throwing a Pity Party. Please remember this is NATURAL and it is a phase. You will not have 2 bad days in a row. If you can stay the course, you will be so glad you did...you can't see it when you're in it...but once you get out, it's like...DUH!!! Amazing what AL will do even once it's out of your blood....stay the course....you will never regret being sober!!!

I just wrote something on Paulywogg's thread that I think bears repeating... Getting sober isn't a sentence...it's not the end of 'fun' as we know it....you are still under there begging to get out, that's why AL brings it out. Once you get clear of the crutch...you are still there. You can still hold conversations and be social. Quitting drinking isn't the end of life as you know it....it's JUST THE BEGINNING!!!

I've never seen so many new newbies! Allan is going to have his hands full keeping up with his Full Moon awards (for 7 days!). Be strong nesters.....we can beat this thing! B

[allankay]

Newbies Nest

Almost free I believe today is your day 7. So please check in to receive your full moon. I gotta go early to bed as have a very early morning start. So if I miss your post hope Byrdie will do the honours.

ALLAN