Newbies Nest

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Good morning Nesters,

Hoping for a sunny days after last evening's heavy rains
Stella & friends really kick up a serious stink when they're wet :H

Welcome back Nellie!
Complacency will get any of us into trouble. I keep coming back day after day purposely so I don't forget.

Kuya, my heavy drinking years went hand-in-hand with 10 years of fairly serious depression. I drank because I was depressed, absolutely. When I finally got a handle on the depression I was able to quit drinking once & for all. That had to be My Way Out.

Lola, I kicked your ass (just a little) back then because I just knew that was what you really needed to let go of the bullshit If we continue to delude ourselves day after day, year after year then nothing will ever change! We all come here because we're looking to change, right??

OK, wishing everyone a great AF Saturday!
Lav

[Fin]

Newbies Nest

Happy Sat, Folks.

Seems as if there has been some ebbs and flows with people coming and going the last 48 hours. Such is the nature of a nest, I guess. I for one continue to experience such an astounding sense of gratitude for finding this path toward an AF experience. I mean, holy shit it's like a completely new life, a second shot, a reboot.

While I experienced some of the negative effects described by others such as fatigue, lack of focus, irritability, etc, etc, it was relatively short lived. I'm still battling the beer bitch voice but other than that, I feel fantastic -- energetic, clear and dare I say the "h" word? Yes, daminit...I'm really happy and honestly so. Getting the shame out of our lives is goood medicine.

All I can say to you all is, "thank you". And for those on the fence, we all go there at some point and make our own choices. All too often I fell in the direction of the masses as they where cheering me on to come join the party, but I never truly achieved real happiness over there. I've tried this other side one other time and failed after 14 days. It seemed too lonely on this side but then on the second time around, I found an entirely new way of living and a community in you guys that god willing, will take me the distance this time.

Anyway, I think I'm pretty good to go now in terms of not caving. I mean, my life brought home a 6-pack of my favorite Stone IPA last night and I wasn't tempted in the slightest. She apologized for letting me see it and I told her not to apologize. I was honestly not tempted. All I had to do was think back to that shitty haze that sets in after one or two of those bad boys which led to 4 or 5 more to kick it up a few notches where it felt better. God, what a sick cycle.

Okay, enough. Back to some mando study.

Be Good,
Fin

[Yogamom]

Newbies Nest

Hi all. I am back here on day 1. Went to that dang Wegmans (grocery) that has wine right next to the register...instead of candy. I went to get soup, but no soup and wine is even better. doh. DH is out of town. But, the rains have stopped and the sun is shining. I will take the mutts out for a walk and clear my head. I also found out dh is having to be gone for several weeks in nov/dec.....maybe including Thanksgiving. Not good. Just got told that yesterday.

Any way. Day 1. Stressful waters ahead. I will catch up with you all and stay close. Dogs looking pitiful at me.

[Fin]

Newbies Nest

Yogamom;1396255 wrote: Hi all. I am back here on day 1. Went to that dang Wegmans (grocery) that has wine right next to the register...instead of candy. I went to get soup, but no soup and wine is even better. doh. DH is out of town. But, the rains have stopped and the sun is shining. I will take the mutts out for a walk and clear my head. I also found out dh is having to be gone for several weeks in nov/dec.....maybe including Thanksgiving. Not good. Just got told that yesterday.

Any way. Day 1. Stressful waters ahead. I will catch up with you all and stay close. Dogs looking pitiful at me.

Hi Yoga,

Will you join our Roll Call? See instructions below. Hope to "see" you around.

[Alcoholic]

Newbies Nest

Nellie:

Don't be too hard on yourself.

The analogy I see is : a kid who usually got Fs Started getting As, then slipped and started getting Fs, again. I would still be very proud of the 3 months of As and that he probably learned a lot during those three months. So you probably got a little healthier during those 3 months. Just like the kid who needs to go back to the books again, just get back on the wagon and don't be too hard on yourself.

To me, any progress is better than no progress. So you are not back to square one at all, because you have had three months sobriety (3 months less poison to your liver). Just get back on and restart it because you know how to do it! .

[lolab]

Newbies Nest

right, Lav. :-)

Cat - yeah I am getting better...I was lots better but during the night I woke up with that thick leftover junk (sorry) in the back of my throat....Hopefully, this is the tail end! I'm such a baby!

Everybody have a great day! Fin, I love how you call your wife your life. :-)

[Alcoholic]

Newbies Nest

Social phobia

I used to think alcohol helped me to socialized w people better. Lately not drinking I actually feel better able to socialize because I'm not afraid of that they will smell alcohol on me!!!

[kuya]

Newbies Nest

Alcoholic;1396412 wrote: I used to think alcohol helped me to socialized w people better. Lately not drinking I actually feel better able to socialize because I'm not afraid of that they will smell alcohol on me!!!

I have just come home from a party, everyone was drinking and fairly merry/drunk ish as I got there late. I was proud to say no to the alcohol ' I have quit drinking'. No one passed any comment, one man I was chatting with said he was planning to quit drinking soon as it was bothering him. I had a great time, the music was pumping, I danced with my son who was so stoked I had gone.

It was just as much fun as ever, better in fact cos I could drive home safely whenever I wanted.

[Slaythefear]

Newbies Nest

Alcoholic;1396294 wrote: Nellie:

Don't be too hard on yourself.

The analogy I see is : a kid who usually got Fs Started getting As, then slipped and started getting Fs, again. I would still be very proud of the 3 months of As and that he probably learned a lot during those three months. So you probably got a little healthier during those 3 months. Just like the kid who needs to go back to the books again, just get back on the wagon and don't be too hard on yourself.

To me, any progress is better than no progress. So you are not back to square one at all, because you have had three months sobriety (3 months less poison to your liver). Just get back on and restart it because you know how to do it! .

*That was a good post! BTW, I didn't mean to lecture you if that is how you perceived it. I saw your questions and wanted to help you see some of the potholes from my learning experiences or from watching others. We do tend to be hypersensitive on these boards and that is why I opened the hypersensitivity thread. Along with that, the written communication can be perceived in a way it was not meant and/or sometimes we aren't ready to hear something or maybe it is something we do need to hear even if it may sting for a bit. Anything I say, I say to try to help or share experiences of traps and successes I've had or heard from others. I don't want you to feel like you can't be honest or like you are being lectured. Thought I'd let you know that.

:l

[Dogwood Blossom]

Newbies Nest

Nellie & Yogamom - WELCOME!

:colorwelcome:

Sounds like you have been around MWO before, so you know, don't beat up on yourself to much, and take care of yourself.

I'm on Day 8 this time. I've had 20 years sobriety, and then slipped back into it for various reasons. As you can see, you should never become too complacent and no amount of time means you are "cured." Much of that 20 years was wonderful and I literally thought little about AL, but when the thoughts started creeping in, I should've run for help with red flags waving, screaming, "help me!" I can blame a lot of things....my Dad had a major stroke, my boys were growing up and leaving and didn't need me anymore, my husband is self-absorbed, my job is unfulfilling, blah, blah, blah. Truth is, everyone deals with these day to day situations, but not everyone drinks! Somewhere in the back of my pea brain; I WANTED TO DRINK! I used my circumstances and all the years I was sober to convince myself it would be alright. It was not.

Everyday that I drink is like living life through a cloud of darkness. I can sometimes function fairly well, but there is no joy. Even 8 days in, the cloud has not gone, but it has lifted. Last night was tough. First time I had a hard time this go. If circumstances would have allowed it, I would have gone to town and gotten a bottle of wine. That feeling makes us so uneasy, so unsettled, so antsy. We're here but our minds are elsewhere. I finally took a deep breath and accepted I was not going to drink, at which point I enjoyed some time on FB and peaked in on MWO and then slept. Waking this morning to a clean sober mind and body was soooo awesome! That's what we need to hold onto when the voices begin. Why is it so hard.

I'm going to hang around here and see if I can get it again and help that cloud to lift so I can live in the light. I don't like being a mole person slinking about living but not really living. I know there are better things and I want them! So all you "Newbies" hang around with me, even if you fall, and we'll try to figure it out together! :l

Dogwood Blossom

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Slay, you took the words right off of my keyboard....
We see people come in just like us...we are all fighting the very same foe...it is hard not to try and push people out of the oncoming traffic. I will try and be more mindful of my words.

Timpin, wanted to give you a NN Nod for a job well done! Yoga and Nellie, great to see you and all are welcome...
Have a great AF day! B

[Slaythefear]

Newbies Nest

Byrdlady;1396513 wrote: Slay, you took the words right off of my keyboard....
We see people come in just like us...we are all fighting the very same foe...it is hard not to try and push people out of the oncoming traffic. I will try and be more mindful of my words.

Timpin, wanted to give you a NN Nod for a job well done! Yoga and Nellie, great to see you and all are welcome...
Have a great AF day! B

Mindful to a degree, but I think it is important to also tell the truth. I haven't always wanted to hear the truth, but it is what I need to hear. Sometimes, we can modify our words to be a bit more delicate knowing people can be hypersensitive, but it is important to be honest about the enemy and how he gets his way. (Note I used a male identity. Hmmm...what could that mean?LOLOL!!!) Ok, guys. Do not perceive that in any other way then I meant it. he he (humor is good for the soul).

Slay

[Alcoholic]

Newbies Nest

Slaythefear:

No worries. I really was not offended and I really appreciated all the well meaning advices.

Maybe I should explain why I don't want lectures. I treat addicts: not just alcoholics but also opiate addicts and other addicts. Isn't that embarrassing? So I've heard it all and I've said it all to others. Knowledge is one thing, emotion another.

What I like about this site is that I have the ability to vent and express my emotions, and learn how others stop cravings, in the meantime I learned about kudzu and glutamine (I knew about about topamax baclofen, an other Rx meds since I'm in the field). So I love this site.

And I'm human, I do get sensitive at times and I ask all to forgive me when I am that way please. If I offend someone, I apologize...

Lets hope for another AF day!!!!

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

You dang right, Slay...humor is always the best medicine..
I was going to make a crack about Alco's massage chair and K9's audition, but was afraid getting pecked by Stella! Nothing worse than a mad, wet chicken!

RC, you are killing us with your Soap Opra...BSH. Is another party in our future? As soon as Lola gets her snotty head cleared out, we'll be good to go! I don't trust her cooking right now...her drippy nose is a concern. We could consult DB who is a nose expert!! XO, B

[Slaythefear]

Newbies Nest

Alcoholic;1396523 wrote: Slaythefear:

No worries. I really was not offended and I really appreciated all the well meaning advices.

Maybe I should explain why I don't want lectures. I treat addicts: not just alcoholics but also opiate addicts and other addicts. Isn't that embarrassing? So I've heard it all and I've said it all to others. Knowledge is one thing, emotion another.

What I like about this site is that I have the ability to vent and express my emotions, and learn how others stop cravings, in the meantime I learned about kudzu and glutamine (I knew about about topamax baclofen, an other Rx meds since I'm in the field). So I love this site.

And I'm human, I do get sensitive at times and I ask all to forgive me when I am that way please. If I offend someone, I apologize...

Lets hope for another AF day!!!!

Embarrassing? I'd stay probably more common then is publicly acknowledged. I've heard this before. I've actually been thinking I'd like to go into that field and here I am fighting it myself. You will often see this in the psychology field as well. People with problems want to help others with the problem. I think we are often drawn to a field we understand personally. Maybe ironic though, lol!

We are all sensitive here. Myself included. I think for many of us, we were already hypersensitive which led us to reach for alcohol or to start abusing it for various reasons. It is a coping mechanism for stress, depression, fear, and on and on. Then comes the biochemical addiction and we have a real problem. I try to be aware of the fact that I can be and so can others more now. Sometimes I need a time out, but I always see it in myself and try to correct it. We are all a work in progress. How wonderful we have that option.

This site helps so many. It's a gift, imo.

Have a great day!:l