Newbies Nest

[kuya]

Newbies Nest

Alcoholic;1396928 wrote: Kuya;

My husband sometimes says I drink too much and then when I said I wanted to quit drinking, he was shocked, and said, "you don't drink that much, do you?" He lets me do pretty much what I want. If I want to destroy my life, he'll let me. If I want to save my life, that's fine w him too. He loves me but he believes in individual choices, even if they are foolish choices.

My goal is to be alcohol free but if I can't and I drink 1-2 glasses once or twice a week , it's still better than my baseline of drinking 1-2
Bottles daily and I'm not going to beat myself over that. It's still progress. I can always get better. But the Great Wall wasn't built in one day!!!! And bad habit takes longer than one day to distinguish sometimes especially when it took many years to develop!!!

If you can hold to that level of intake that will not be a problem. Have you found the drink tracker on here yet? You can log your intake and have that to keep track.

My problem was that like you I drank 12-15 units daily and I am unable to moderate down. Nor would I want to really.

[iamaquitter28]

Newbies Nest

Lav: that's so cute. Dogs are so darn smart (when they wanna be) I would love to have a farm with some chickies (as we call them around here). Unfortunately, our community doesn't allow that! :-( I wanted to get a pony for my daughter's birthday party and they said no to that. Bastards, LOL. so I have my own domestic farm. 4 dogs, 3 cats, and 14 turtles! Ha, take that HOA!

[kuya]

Newbies Nest

IAM you are doing so well! Congrats and I am so glad you are feeling so positive.

Like you I could not moderate, nor would I want to now.

Keep going, from now it gets easier, there are now odd days that are crappy BUT they are always followed by a better day. I call the bad day a detox day when your body is re-wiring and you feel bad. If you have one, greet it with joy as it is a sure sign you are repairing physically and psychologically.

[iamaquitter28]

Newbies Nest

Well thank you Kuya! Without this forum I do believe I would have caved on more than one occasion! I keep MWO with me where ever ago and keeps me in check.

Personally, I wouldn't want to moderate either. Over the last few days of being sober I've had a lot of time to reflect on the way I REALLY feel about AL. I HATE it! I hate the taste, I hate the feeling of being drunk, I hate what I makes me into, I hate being hung over, I hate the guilty feeling the next day, and I especially hate the pains I get in my right side the day after a big bender! I hate the fear of not knowing which time I drink could possibly be my last. Moderation may be for some just not for me!
I feel like from here on out, even though I'll get the cravings, I can make it. I made it through day 1,2,3, and 4...what makes 5,6,7, or 8 any different.

[kuya]

Newbies Nest

iamaquitter28;1397042 wrote: Well thank you Kuya! Without this forum I do believe I would have caved on more than one occasion! I keep MWO with me where ever ago and keeps me in check.

Personally, I wouldn't want to moderate either. Over the last few days of being sober I've had a lot of time to reflect on the way I REALLY feel about AL. I HATE it! I hate the taste, I hate the feeling of being drunk, I hate what I makes me into, I hate being hung over, I hate the guilty feeling the next day, and I especially hate the pains I get in my right side the day after a big bender! I hate the fear of not knowing which time I drink could possibly be my last. Moderation may be for some just not for me!
I feel like from here on out, even though I'll get the cravings, I can make it. I made it through day 1,2,3, and 4...what makes 5,6,7, or 8 any different.

Once you hate it, you can quit it. Each day is different, just like real life! Cravings wise you really are past the worst.
What doesn't get said enough is that alcohol is the EASIEST drug to quit. Unfortunately, because of its social acceptability it is the hardest to stay quit. But this is social and mental NOT physical.
I now can't believe I swallowed POISON for all those years, WTF was I thinking?!?!

I went to a party last night, it was fun but seeing the effect of alcohol on some was pitiful. I did not even for a moment want a drink. I kept checking my drink to make sure I had picked up the right one. But like any physical addiction if I drink even one I know I will be back on the rollercoaster. I know cos I did it last time......except last time my thinking had not changed.

Still wouldn't want to test it though......what for?

[kuya]

Newbies Nest

And BTW I think most cravings are low blood sugar IMHO. Every time I get a twinge of a craving I have ALWAYS been hungry.
I also think that alcoholism is a getting to be a greater problem for women as it is a symptom of underlying anorexia and/or bulaemia. We won't eat as we fear obesity but we drink and our brains learn that this is the ONE way we will allow sugar in.

[rooniferd]

Newbies Nest

Speaking of moderation....

I've been trying to moderate for a few years now, and it just occurred to me that these last few years have been my heaviest drinking years. You would think the years of attempting to moderate would show some decrease in consumption. Nope. Just the opposite for me.

Byrdie - you said the same thing happened to you, right?

I've kept a hardcopy alcohol tracker for many years. Every morning I get up, I write down the number of drinks I had the day before. For those days that I got too smashed to count, I just put an unhappy face next to the date. I tally up the drinks at the end of the week. Some weeks I had as many as 30 or 40 drinks, and probably even more on the weeks where I was too drunk to count.

40 drinks? And I'm not a home drinker. I drink in bars. Do you know how much money it takes to drink 40 drinks at a bar? And then you've got the junk food on top of that. Oh, and let's not forget about the enormous tips I would leave the bartender for making me all those drinks - because he was my best friend and pal! RIIIIIGGGGHHHHTTTT.....

He was laughing all the way to the bank. And I know that, because I bartended myself for many years. I just couldn't believe all the money people would throw at me drunk. Sometimes I knew they were going to wake up the next morning and regret it, but I didn't care. I was already well on my way to spending that wad!

My point about this is that I am one of those people who CANNOT moderate. If I try to moderate, I drink even more. It's always the same ol' thought - I'll start tomorrow. Just one more party with the Beast. Just one more night to have fun. I'll start tomorrow....

Then tomorrow becomes the next day, and so on. The proverbial hampster wheel.

I hope and pray those days are over!!

[Yogamom]

Newbies Nest

Morning Nest. Sitting here with a pot of Joe and a big old house that needs to get cleaned. IAM, I agree, there is so much I hate about alcohol. I have gotten those right side pains too. Does it stop me like it would stop a normal person? But, I also on some level find comfort in it that I need to find something else. I do like the taste. I wont drink it if I dont like it. Kind of likecthecwarm cup of jo in the am.

Alc, my dh is the same way. He likes a beer and I think he thinks occasionally I overdo it but never says anything.

Rooni, the concert sounded great. Isnt freeing not to worry about the alcohol?

Lav, your dog sounds beautiful. I would love to see a picture.

Another beautiful day on the east coast. DH comes home tonight swap out bags. I have to keep busy and have a plan. I will check in later.

[RunningCourage]

Newbies Nest

rooniferd;1397048 wrote: Speaking of moderation....

My point about this is that I am one of those people who CANNOT moderate. If I try to moderate, I drink even more. It's always the same ol' thought - I'll start tomorrow. Just one more party with the Beast. Just one more night to have fun. I'll start tomorrow....

Then tomorrow becomes the next day, and so on. The proverbial hampster wheel.

I hope and pray those days are over!!

AHA! Now, see that wee line in bold? THAT'S what Mr Richard Head was saying to me these last however many years. But what he DID NOT TELL ME, was that, with being AF, there would be MANY MORE NIGHTS OF FUN...

Groovy...

Oh yeah...

Get down...

Dig it...

And dance... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MfAJLGFWxYo[/video]]SEXY KILT

:crazymonkey:

[iamaquitter28]

Newbies Nest

RunningCourage;1397051 wrote: AHA! Now, see that wee line in bold? THAT'S what Mr Richard Head was saying to me these last however many years. But what he DID NOT TELL ME, was that, with being AF, there would be MANY MORE NIGHTS OF FUN...

Groovy...

Oh yeah...

Get down...

Dig it...

And dance... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MfAJLGFWxYo[/video]]SEXY KILT

:crazymonkey:

RC: you absolutely crack me up!!!

[Alcoholic]

Newbies Nest

Iama: congrats on your progress! You are doing so very well!

Kuya: I use the alcohol tracker... It's a great tool. I use supplements/ meds and so maybe that's why I can just drink 1-2 glasses and not even be able to finish them. Believe me, I'm no exception to the no moderation rule!!! I just have help from supplements/meds.

Lav: we had 4 chickens when we lived in Ohio. My husband even built a little heater in the winter for them and a huge wire fortress to prevent hawks, foxes from killing them. Initially we lost a few and he was very sad. He wants to retire one day and be a chicken farmer. He's a lawyer now and hates his job.

Today is a new day, I'm going to sit in my chair and read and not drink!!!! Good luck nesters!

[lolab]

Newbies Nest

Good morning! I hope everybody's enjoying this weekend. I haven't read back...seriously if you miss a day around here, it's nearly impossible to catch up!

We went out last night - had lots of fun - not one person noticed me not drinking...and I saw quite a few others who weren't...one who was the "typical" "I don't drink" with a holier than thou attitude - that scared the heck out of me in the beginning...I thought I was destined to become one of those!!! But I didn't. :-) I just mind my own business and do my own thing.

I'm tired today - not used to being out and about so late. :-)

[Alcoholic]

Newbies Nest

Nanette: welcome! Stick around and post your thoughts and progress! Love to hear from you!

Fin: great job! Wish I could do as well but I'm still trying!

Yoga mom: good to see you here!

Lav: those chicks are so cute! many years ago in ohio i bought some thinking they would be good pets but they grew into chickens like overnight! Then my husband became obsessed w chicken raising...

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Rooni, I am so happy for you! You are correct, it is I who said that I never drank harder than the year I tried to moderate. It was as if I were in an ocean and fighting for my life and when I got the life ring (a drink) I grabbed onto it too hard and I was afraid someone was going to take it away so I drank as much as I could. I ended up drowning, so to speak. When I allowed myself to drink, I made up for lost time...I was drinking out of panic. It was a cycle...I couldn't see it then, but I sure can now.

Lav, thank you for sharing the baby pictures!! Gosh they look like they smell so good!! We should all have a reunion up at your place! The Big Sober House takes a road trip!

Fin! Great job!! You are showing us how it's done!
Dottie, Ima, Cat, Yoga and Nanette! Showing off your AF muscles!!! You just gotta get mad! Enough IS Enough!!
Kuya, laying it down for REAL! I love your posts!! Spot on! You must not be Southern...I haven't heard one mention of pork in your posts!!
Running....what can I say?? You are truly one of a kind! Do you know how lucky we are you're here? I can't wait to see what I do next in TBSH!!

Do yall know how badly it messes us up when you change avatars??? I actually believe Lolab IS a stylish woman from the 60's. Where would Lav be without Stella's mug? Stumpy has just changed completely.....Some nights when I've been out at a restaurant and feeling sorry for myself for not 'getting' to drink...I imagined all our little avatars on the table cheering me on! If it helps ONCE it's worth it, right?? Can you imagine the wrath of Kuya with that avatar?? It's NOT worth it! And if you can take an objective look around...everyone else is NOT drinking! That's a perception we drinkers carry with us...that we're the only odd balls. That isn't the case at all.

Stay strong Nesters! It takes a village to keep us all in line since we are all over the world! But we can do it together! B

[Catbuddy]

Newbies Nest

Morning, all. Another beautiful fall morning in California (you guys across the pond, enjoy it vicariously through me).

A little excitement here. Since going AF I've dropped 8 lbs. I went from being unable to look in the mirror to seeing the slimness of my face return. I went to my hairstylist yesterday, and got my usual cut and color. When we looked at the results, it was at least two shades darker brown, although she used the same formula. She commented on how much my hair had grown, and that it seemed to be much healthier and had therefore taken the color more strongly. She was impressed but puzzled. I said I had made some changes in my life that I would share at my next appointment. She said, "the moment you walked in I knew something was different."

Then I went clothes shopping with my son. I bought this SMOKING HOT Calvien Kline dress, all fitted and such. Now I'm off to a zumba class at my gym to shake my hips. So I'm absolutely spreading confidennce around the universe at the physical changes. Just like pheremones, I hope the men can smell it and come running.

Nine months since my last "sleepover." I'm just saying.........too long.

nfire:

Cat