Newbies Nest

[Alcoholic]

Newbies Nest

Lolab: please stay. Sorry to neglect you.

But I have to ask FIn: what's IPA?

[RunningCourage]

Newbies Nest

Fin;1399312 wrote: WHERE'S CAT?

Ditto...

[RunningCourage]

Newbies Nest

lolab;1399455 wrote: ummm....nobody worry about me....I think it's time I take a little break.

You ok m'dear? Just need some chill time?

[lolab]

Newbies Nest

I didn't say it to get a bunch of please stay posts although nurdl that one was very sweet. :-)

Alcoholic, I don't feel "neglected"...As much as I do enjoy helping others here - I just have to do what's best for me in the long run...and the atmosphere around here that's been lingering for the past couple of months is extremely uncomfortable for me.

For the past year and a half the nest has been a place that I felt comfortable - and supported - and never tempted - it's probably why I didn't stray too much. If I did stray, I would eye a post by someone about drinking and being able to stop at 2 - or someone else who was thrilled that they've been able to limit their drinking to weekends...and not only on the moderation threads. I have avoided them pretty directly. So it's upsetting to me to have it discussed that we aren't doing things "right" in the nest (we've only been doing what seemed to work best - at least until recently)......I still feel the harsh reality that newbies feel sometimes - when I hear those stories - and it really makes my mind think I could do it...but I've exercised it enough to know that I CAN'T. It really pains me to think that people early in their sobriety shouldn't be shielded - even with an unwritten rule - from such thoughts being waved in front of them...

So, I will maybe check in next week - but I really do need to take a break. I'm really sorry.

[Fin]

Newbies Nest

lolab;1399473 wrote: So it's upsetting to me to have it discussed that we aren't doing things "right" in the nest

I'm sorry for stirring this up. Don't go. Nothing has been done wrong. Don't worry about those other folks (who aren't even participating in this thread) because we need you veterans around here to be successful.

[Alcoholic]

Newbies Nest

And I am sorry you think that way and hope you change your mind. The atmosphere may change back to normal very soon. It was not my intention to make the atmosphere uncomfortable, but I would have to say it was uncomfortable for some of the newbies too who also decided to leave. Ultimately each of us have to find their comfort zone and hopefully you will eventually find this place to be comfortable again.

[Dottie Belle]

Newbies Nest

depends on how u define newbie. for me 1 year maybe Dottie

[allankay]

Newbies Nest

I hope this picture will brighten up your day. It sure gave me a laugh when I most needed

And with this.. I will control your Life! - Picture

Google Image Result for http://p.twimg.com/AvbNfyECAAANskS.jpg

BTW Fin, or anybody else knows how to insert a pic into a post?

AK

[RunningCourage]

Newbies Nest

And now for something completely different...

Flatmates are having a fucking house party. The walls are as robust as recycled loo-roll. The laughter through these walls-as-thin-as-veils is penetrating every cell in my body, making it shudder with furious rage.

I sit here, upon my bed, motionless.

In sobriety i have to await until the communal high of others as they get drunk - the screeching, the wailing, the chemical-induced hilarity, the reverberating-incandescent-rage-inducing beats from the music player - dies down. It's 11pm... It's gonna be a long, sore night...

I have work tomorrow.

But so do they.

And when i was their age, I would not be sitting here. No. I would be through there with them. So it's not as if i can say, hey guys, sorry to be a party pooper, but i gotta get some sleep.

Well I can.

But I bide my time and see...

Honestly, it's times like this that i want to yell.

Quite loudly.

But I don't.

It's at times like these i want to dive into a bottle of Cab Sav.

Deeply.

But I can't.

It's at times like these... It's at times like these that i question WHY are my living conditions such as this.

And then answer...

That they could be so much worse...

(And remind myself that wherever I move to, I will still be there... So what am i really moving from?)

But tonight, as I listen to my personal tyranny that is half a dozen folks speaking loudly over each other in a cacophony of drunken screeches and yells and hollers, I just wish, hope, pray, for silence...

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Running...I'm so sorry you have loud neighbors. How frustrating in all senses...they are over there having a high ole time, and I'm stuck here and can't...
Believe me...it is easy to just say f it all! There would be nothing easier for me or any of us to run to the comfort of the good ole Numb Zone. Remember my book, Numb and Number...(that's not number like a 9 or anything, it's even more numb). I wrote the book on escaping from reality. But now we are writing a new book...on coping. There is NOTHING in the bottom of that bottle but hopelessness and dispair. The GSR Brothers live down there, too. Guilt/Shame/Remorse are all relatives of mine. Maybe you have outgrown your flatmates...as I have outgrown some of my 'friends'....but there are new friends to be made, and they want you to be around for a very long time...I am one of those friends. Go over and tell them to hold it down for Chroist's Sake! They wont' even remember you did it....yeah, that's living. Dig your heels in and don't give in no matter what and no matter who. Tomorrow will be a better day for us all! XXOO, B

[Catbuddy]

Newbies Nest

RunningCourage;1399498 wrote: Flatmates are having a fucking house party.

(And remind myself that wherever I move to, I will still be there... So what am i really moving from?)

..

Hey RC (and Fin - thanks for casting the net out for me).

RC, that's what we are learning. I can't run from job. You can't run from your flat. It sounds like you might be feeling some of that frustration I've struggled with this past week, and are missing that release from AL as well. No doubt it feels good to have that release. No doubt my blood pressure goes down. What are those stages of grief? Isn't anger one of them? You deserve a little anger. A little steam from your ears. You are so gracious and supportive of everyone. Let rip some righteous fury.

Sadly, you will read this in your morning and the feelings will probably have passed. Wish I could have been here earlier.

Cat

PS I hope everyone is having a strong AF day, or coping if it's trying to kick your a**. I'll try to be a support any way I can.

[Habsfan]

Newbies Nest

Made it through day 2

Hi to all Nesters, hope everyone had a good AL free day.

Thank you for all the welcomes, especially Stumpy, Byrdlady, Alcoholic, Lolab and nurdl. Forgive me if I missed anyone.

Byrdlady, You said that you "consider my quit to be my most prized possession" Well said. I hope to say that too one of these days.

Nurdl - great that you flip the bird to liqueur stores! I have half a box of wine in the house and every time since yesterday that I've walked by it, I've given it the finger.

Lolab - I've read several of your posts. You bring a wonderful wisdom to the nest. We're all on a similar journey, we all need to find our own way. I hope you don't leave the nest - you will be missed by all, especially the newbies I think. It is because of people like you that I came back when I realized I needed to change and needed help to do it.

Today is day 2. The urge was strong today, more so than yesterday. It was a warm and sunny day here and I busied myself with fall outdoor chores followed by a 5 km walk with my dog.

Good night Nesters, have a great night and a great Friday.

Habsfan

[change=freedom]

Newbies Nest

Hello fellow newbies

Lavande;1399169 wrote:
Hello & welcome change & congrats on your two AF days
Stay close & let us know how you are doing.
Thanks for the warm welcome Lav (and everyone else who's welcomed me - this is a great forum)

Dottie Belle;1399173 wrote: Morning all,
Off to eye surgery today...probably will be off line until tomorrow...
Best wishes Dottie, hope you're feeling ok and tucked up safe in bed.

lolab;1399197 wrote:
Change – It’s a good book with lots of fresh perspective…I found it very helpful and enlightening even if I hadn’t been trying to quit….I mean just the way that society looks at alcohol. I’m kind of a quietly do things on my own type of person – even with my drinking….so the quitting was that way too….sometimes I wonder how it would have been different if I had been more open about things. But I’m pleased with the result – and this place was my lifeline.

Hi lola, I'm halfway through the book now and though I'm not enjoying the read too much, I'm sticking with it and hoping I get some enlightenment from it. I haven't told anyone I've quit drinking either, apart from my housemates because of the crisis I got into when I cut back my intake too drastically, not realising I was chemically hooked for the first time ever.

RunningCourage;1399498 wrote: Flatmates are having a fucking house party. The walls are as robust as recycled loo-roll. The laughter through these walls-as-thin-as-veils is penetrating every cell in my body, making it shudder with furious rage.

I really feel for you RunningCourage and I hope they've piped down and you're snoozing away. I've been in that situation when I had 15 druggies living downstairs (in a 1-bedroom flat) at one place and I'm embarrassed to even say what they got up to at all hours of the night. I hardly slept the whole year I was tied into my rental contract. I know that rage you're feeling.

I hope everyone's having a good day/evening. I'm looking forward to tucking up in bed with that Allen Carr book shortly.

[Alcoholic]

Newbies Nest

Habsfan: I'm glad you didn't give into the urge today. It really does get easier. I'm so glad you are staying w us!

Change: Everyone is reading that Allen Carr book. Did you get it at local book store or ordered on line?

[change=freedom]

Newbies Nest

Alcoholic;1399580 wrote:
Change: Everyone is reading that Allen Carr book. Did you get it at local book store or ordered on line?

Oh, I saw his name mentioned in the Tool Box and noticed a few people have read it, but I didn't know that it was a staple or anything. I got it at a local book store.