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    Newbies Nest

    Having a great AF day, Choppersmom--thanks for asking! And I am sending you a compassionate meditation to help you in supporting your family.
    TranqWilly--thank you for your words of encouragement--it has helped!
    Skittles--hang in there--it won't always be like this--nurture yourself and keep logging on MWO.
    Chicken--it's funny when I look at my triggers--maybe we should focus on what is *not* our triggers? I know that list would be much shorter list for sure!

    I sure hope I can feel like this everyday--strong and capable! Thank you all for your part in this feeling.
    "Tell me, what do you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" Mary Oliver

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      Newbies Nest

      Thank you , Lavande! That means so much to me. I think we were posting at the same time as I just now read your post.

      I'm excited to start my day 2--I am not so fearful and walking on eggshells around myself. (No offense to chicken .
      "Tell me, what do you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" Mary Oliver

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        Newbies Nest

        Quit picking on our chicken, you guys! :H Sheesh... chicken, egg, eggshells...

        *sigh*

        Well, I've had a day from hell...
        Not sure if I mentioned my dog's VERY odd behavior? He was fine when we arrive here Friday... Saturday we went to the 'big smoke' (Home Depot, etc.), so were gone probably 5 hours or so. When we got back I let Shelby out and since then he has REFUSED to come into the house. I mean, refused. Ears and tail down, sits on his butt and I'd have to drag him. Ok... very strange, but if he's happier outside... so be it. This morning, he ran off to the 'neighbours' (a good 5 minute drive). They called, we went and picked him up, he was very happy to see us and hopped right into the truck. Got back here, went to put stuff in the house.. turned around... dog gone. Right back to the neighbours. I left him there until after supper... don't have time to keep going back and forth. Stuck him in the house now... he ain't a happy camper. Very anxious... pacing, whining a bit... just VERY out of character. I have no clue what's going on with him.

        In the midst of moving heavy furniture, desks, wood stove, etc. for another run to the dump tomorrow, I'm starting to get real nasty cramps front and back. Guess what arrived way early... yep, THAT time of the month. Wonderful. Nothing stronger than Advil in the house and they're not doing squat. They do help for the blisters on my feet, though. A little.

        Check my email before dinner to deal with a few work related things... email from my dad. My mom is in ICU in Yarmouth, Nova Scotia (my parents have a cottage there... they live in Germany - just got there Wednesday night) Pneumonia in both lungs and something they can't figure out... Docs want to take her by air ambulance to Halifax. I spoke with the hospital... since I didn't even have my dad's cell # with me (there's no land line where they are)... my mom's nurse was an absolute darling. Said my mom is hardly responding to anything, doesn't speak, eat or drink. I asked her to please tell my mom I called... she said.. hang on, I'll go in right now, maybe she'll talk to you. Well, she did. Kinda. She sounded terribly weak, had a hard time breathing, was really not quite there at all. I didn't really get anything of value from her... except a promise that she will at least try to drink.

        I'm in a constant state of nearly in tears these last few days... SO not like me. As a matter of fact, last Friday Mr. Wonderful said that he was kinda 'worried' because he'd known me over a year and never seen me cry. Huh? Girls are supposed to be bawling all the time, or what?

        Man, this week is sure doing a number on my mental/emotional state. However, I'm happy to report that I'm still AF. I did have a fleeting thought today, when I looked at the open bottle of wine on the counter (the one Mr. Wonderful opened on Friday evening). But I dismissed THAT thought and went back to work. Phew.

        Sorry to be rambling on like this... I'm just a bit of a mess here.

        I wish you all a good night - be good, be strong, and be safe! :l
        Okay, WHO put a stop payment on my reality check?

        Winning since October 24th, 2013

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          Newbies Nest

          Yep. Wanna get me some of that Lavand-ittude. Hey, Lav maybe you can bottle some of that and get RJ to sell it on the site as a supplement.

          Openheart can use some too. Way to go on day one. Sounds like your in a good mind-frame for day two. Make it as easy as possible on yourself.

          Take care! G'nite.
          Nobody asked for this; we're just stuck cleaning up the mess. -

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            Newbies Nest

            Oh Sunni. They say when it rains it pours, but you're getting a monsoon. God bless your mom. It sounds like she' getting good care. Good for you on holding off the urges and staying af. It might be better for you to try to keep a clear head right now. Sending a prayer your way for mom, and for everything else to get better soon. Take good care.

            ps- okay no more Chicken remarks. Sorry Chicken! G'nite.
            Nobody asked for this; we're just stuck cleaning up the mess. -

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              Newbies Nest

              Hello Nesters,
              Sorry that I have not been around lately. I am getting ready for my trip to Dallas to work for 13 weeks. Thank God that I finally have some work. So sorry for your troubles Sunnibutt. I will put you and Mom in my prayers. Nice to see you Chopper. Welcome newcomers; sending you strength. I am sure that I will be around more once I get to Dallas. Love to all.
              "Decide-Which Voice in Your Head you Can Keep Alive" (Shinedown)

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                Newbies Nest

                Hello Nesters,
                Sorry that I have not been around lately. I am getting ready for my trip to Dallas to work for 13 weeks. Thank God that I finally have some work. So sorry for your troubles Sunnibutt. I will put you and Mom in my prayers. Nice to see you Chopper. Welcome newcomers; sending you strength. I am sure that I will be around more once I get to Dallas. Love to all.
                "Decide-Which Voice in Your Head you Can Keep Alive" (Shinedown)

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                  Newbies Nest

                  Hello Nesters,
                  Sorry that I have not been around lately. I am getting ready for my trip to Dallas to work for 13 weeks. Thank God that I finally have some work. So sorry for your troubles Sunnibutt. I will put you and Mom in my prayers. Nice to see you Chopper. Welcome newcomers; sending you strength. I am sure that I will be around more once I get to Dallas. Love to all.
                  "Decide-Which Voice in Your Head you Can Keep Alive" (Shinedown)

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                    Newbies Nest

                    *Cluck*

                    Hello The Nest!

                    Well things seem to be looking up here and I am staying on track..touch wood or twig!
                    I have a Dr's visit tomorrow with Danika my 2 yr old to check into her Kidney problems which are ongoing..to figure out what our next step will be *sigh*

                    Swimming lesson prior to that which always makes her happy though

                    Seacailin- hope the preps for you move and work are going along well? Are you excited?
                    Tranq- as long as you smile when you 'dis' me..then I don't mind *cluck cluck*
                    Sunni- I am feeling for you now and sending you and your Mum lot's of good vibes and healing......by the way I'm in cycle with you...thus the 'bloating'urgh! Plus would your dog be freaking out cause of all the moving?Our dog freaks out if we even pack for a day or two away!!!
                    Openheart-yes,what can I say isn't a trigger......? When I'm feeling ill!LOL
                    Lav-can you just send that attitude 'express'! I'll pay postage!
                    Chops-lots of hugs from this part of the world!
                    How's it going Skittles?Hope all is ok?
                    Sooty??
                    Over and Out
                    Chicken:h

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                      Newbies Nest

                      Hi Chicken! You're sounding clucky again. There's always a smile -- I'm a big fan of yours! I was missing your energy when you were down. Honest - the chicken-jokes were just to shout out and try to get you out of your shell (oops there's another one). Glad you're back!

                      Hey, today is day 30 af for me. woo woo! I don't think I'm dreaming, so it must be me. Feels good to get here. Thanks to all for the help over the bumps and stumps. You guys kept me going.

                      Lotta Luv to Sunni -- be strong!!!

                      Take care all.
                      Nobody asked for this; we're just stuck cleaning up the mess. -

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                        Newbies Nest

                        Hey Tranq..I've got a great idea..........
                        Howabout you and me start up a 'mutual admiration'society...then all the other Nestlings could join in and we could establish the first ever 'Admiration Branch"...
                        or even, 'The Mutual Branch of Admiration!"....or howabout...
                        "The Branch of Mutual Admiration PTY LTD'!
                        What do you think...hmmmm??????
                        *cluck & chortle*

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                          Newbies Nest

                          Hi fellow newbie nesters!

                          A quick report again on me...

                          I am managing to cut back weekly AL, generally have a few wed or thurs nights, and then only on weekends... as opposed to ALL THE TIME as was happening those months ago...Today is the 4 month anniversary of my brothers suicide, so I guess it marks some progress in the right direction...

                          My partner has cut back his drinking somewhat in my presense, and whilst it's not easy whilst I am having an AF night and he isn't, I do appreciate his effort to minimise my distress! On a positive we are both going to bed earlier, I am not keeping him up drinking, we are having more sex, we are more rested, we look better, and are less grouchy with each other and our 1 yo beautiful girl!!!
                          Oh the benefits...tell me again why we do this thing called drink???
                          Red Red Wine...My Love/Hate Relationship...

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                            Newbies Nest

                            Good morning Nesters,

                            Goodness, the Clucking is so loud here I have to cover my ears..............just kidding chicken Glad you're back in form!! How well I remeber the massive hormonal mood swings, I seriously don't miss them. The problem is, when you get to a certain age you have to learn to live without those hormones..........that's when I got into trouble, ugh. I hope your little one does well with the Dr visit toda

                            openheart, stay strong for Day 2, it gets better & better!

                            Sunni, you are in my thoughts & prayers friend. So much on your plate right now, geez! I'm glad your Mom has caring people around her. She'll improve as the antibiotics kick in I'm sure. Bilateral Pneumonia is tough on the elderly. I'm confident Mr Wonderful is at your side providing support. About your dog ---- I have one that exhibits similar behaviors. I consider her to be oddly 'intelligent'. We have several doors to our house, she will go out any door but only come in one of the doors. Whatever!
                            Hang in there yourself Sunni, we're all thinking of you!

                            jolenje, good for you on your progress! Feeling & looking better is a definite plus

                            TranqWilly - how much do you think a bottle of Lavan-ittude is worth??????? I wonder what people would be willing to pay. To think, I've been giving this precious substance away............
                            Congratulations on your 30 days It's a great feeling, isn't it?

                            Wishing a wonderful AF Wednesday to everyone.
                            Lav
                            AF since 03/26/09
                            NF since 05/19/09
                            Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

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                              Newbies Nest

                              I'll take 5 bottles of Lavan-ittude

                              Hey I don't care what you charge. I just went 3 days AF first time in ages, then hubby calls while I'm driving through ugly traffic to say he's going to the club for 1. I was in control before that call, but straight after it I found myself fighting horrid thoughts which I don't know if they were psychological or physical cravings. Got home, made a cup of tea straight away, but.....hubby walks in with a beer in his hand, next thing I'm in the fridge finishing off his half bottle of wine from the night before. I didn't stop there but sneakily had last of the vodka. I feel like a right loser! I was so determined. What can I do to fight the urge when I see someone else drinking? Plus the friends put pressure on me to just have one, I haven't told anyone that isn't possible for me, just too embarrased. So have to start again, I need a tool or something to stop me caving at the last minute, any ideas? thanks for all your help, amazing people and stories
                              blobville :upset:
                              :wings:

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                                Newbies Nest

                                Hi zbeam and everyone else. I think we just gotta toughen up - I've been using a stressful visit by my relations as an excuse this week and I have decided tonight that this is a cowardly thing to do - I have got to cope with difficult stuff without resorting to drink so I'm making a promise to do just that for the remainder of their visit (they leave on Saturday) so I'm going public cos I'd hate to tell you guys that I've failed.
                                I going to be using the Lav-attitude and I'm going to crack this little challenge that I've set myself.
                                zbeam, I guess what I'm saying is that there will always be triggers - what we've got to do is learn how to deal with them without giving in.
                                Its going to be hard but someone's gotta do it (lol)
                                All the best everyone, I'll be back tomorrow night to let you know how I'm doing.
                                Have a good day all, I'm so glad I'm in your gang
                                Sooty xxxx

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