Newbies Nest

[kuya]

Newbies Nest

Hi Lola, hi Nurdl.......off to bed now .......tis much too late

Good luck D, sounds like you and Bennii could pal up ...........

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Good morning Nesters,

Doing a quick flyby, I'm running late this morning.

Hello & welcome Dstro, glad you found us!
Please be sure you go to the Health store here on the site & download the MWO book. Take a look at the Hypno CDs as well - I loved them

Wishing everyone a great AF Monday. AL doesn't help resolve life's problems, only serves to make them worse
Lav

[Alcoholic]

Newbies Nest

Good morning:

A tough weekend. I also had low mood yesterday for no apparent reason and didn't hardly get out of bed. I read many people here also found this weekend particularly down. Too bad it's impossible to have good mood all the time.

It's a new day and hopefully it'll be a little brighter for everyone. Lets have another AF day!

[Fin]

Newbies Nest

Okay, today is really Day 1 and am quitting for good -- attempts to moderate a no go, but had to learn the hard way. On a very positive note, I have received massively motivating news this past Sat which is that after 22 years of waiting, my permit to float the Colorado River through the Grand Canyon has surfaced. Launch date is early July 2013. It's a 21 day trip and if I can pull it off, I plan on being 100% AF for it.

I have already spoken to my team at work and they are supportive. Next, ease the wife into the idea that I'll be gone for nearly a month next summer. I also need to rig my dory for white water. Oooooahhhhh! This is an opportunity of a lifetime and I intend to enjoy and remember every second of it AF.

Be good,
-Fin

[Starfish1]

Newbies Nest

Good morning nest mates!
Just reading back over posts from last night. What a busy nest! Looks like the AL beast is working on us! Thanks so much to our nest moms for helping us fight him off and for all those great words of wisdom.
A couple thoughts seem to be running through all these threads- several of us are having to deal with family issues that are causing stress, pain and drinking thoughts. This is the bad news. Several of us are tempted to drink as a way of escape from this pain and stress- more unsettling news.
BUT the great news is that we all agree that drinking will solve nothing and in fact just create more problems for all involved.
Lets all please listen to this and hang tight. We can do it!
XOXO Star

[Slaythefear]

Newbies Nest

Kradle quote: "All I know for certain is I must avoid these emotional extremes."

*Me, too, Kradle. I'm making some very difficult choices and changes in my life currently to help with this issue. I'm the type of person that requires stability and a sense of peace and calm in my life. Drama, chaos and disorganized people who constantly bring it around and use and hurt me are my enemy that work for AL. I don't do well with emotional eruptions. Unfortunately for me, it's not just a friend, but family members that I have to cut the cord to for now, so I can heal and take care of myself, but it has been very painful. That caused me to slip up, but better to cut and slip and get it over with than to keep prolonging it daily. I'm facing facts these days rather than avoiding them with AL, but it's a long process...not one done in a day. I'm actually implementing a version of your fantasy plan and working hard not to feel guilty abut it. I suppose this part of my life allows for that, so I can consider myself fortunate, but it can be lonely as well when you cut so many things out you are use to or love. The kicking out part isn't as easy as it sounds.


Almost Free's quote: "To be honest, I've let it pass so many times today, but due to circumstances going on, particularly today, it just won't let go. Unfortunately, it's a situation that seems to have no answer or resolution within my power and I'm feeling pretty hopeless that it can end any way but badly. It's hard to elaborate here, but it's a situation that involves my youngest (adult) son, who was diagnosed with schizophrenia. It's just a never ending nightmare. So many months of painstaking progress, only to see it all coming apart."


*I understand that heartbreaking pain with family well, Almost. There are so many emotions intertwined when it is your child. If you are feeling guilt, that may be one of the first you'll have to deal with in order to step back and take care of yourself. Watching Pete and Repeat becomes insanity. When you just can't take it any longer, you will face facts and do what is necessary. It's the grieving process. Eventually, you have to accept the reality.

Allan,

Yep, yep, and yep. I definitely don't like the 'drinking buddies' when I'm not drinking. Then again, they are drinkers, so one wanders who some of them may be without the alcohol and reasons for drinking. The path to enlightenment (fill in word of choice) happens to people at different speeds. Some never get there. With that said, they aren't healthy choices for my growth and in fact, very harmful, so they must go. It's the family members that are the one's that are painful to remove. Nonetheless, it has to be done. I can't make things be the way I want them to be, I have to accept them for what they are. Acceptance is something I'm learning A LOT about these days. Instead of fighting it day and night, I'm letting go to it. Freedom will follow, but it takes time.


Byrdlady,

Thanks for the acknowledgement. YOU are such a kind and AWESOME person. You give so much here. I hope you give to yourself just as well. I've been a person my whole life who gave and gave and gave until the life was zapped from me. AL was my friend to help me absorb that place where I never gave to me because there was nothing left. Part of my transformation is learning to take care of myself and to let others take care of themselves. To define my responsibilities appropriately. That doesn't mean to not give, but to not sacrifice myself in the process to the point of killing myself with AL. It's important to be sure the person you are giving to appreciates it and doesn't just use you for what they can get. I love your spirit of giving. I for one appreciate it, but hope you get wonderful things in your life, too.:l


To all newbies or anyone I didn't mention, stay close here. It's a great place to gain support so you can face the things you need to face and make the proper changes. Be patient with yourself but determined.

:lto all.

Love,

Slay

[Slaythefear]

Newbies Nest

Starfish1;1409915 wrote: Good morning nest mates!
Just reading back over posts from last night. What a busy nest! Looks like the AL beast is working on us! Thanks so much to our nest moms for helping us fight him off and for all those great words of wisdom.
A couple thoughts seem to be running through all these threads- several of us are having to deal with family issues that are causing stress, pain and drinking thoughts. This is the bad news. Several of us are tempted to drink as a way of escape from this pain and stress- more unsettling news.
BUT the great news is that we all agree that drinking will solve nothing and in fact just create more problems for all involved.
Lets all please listen to this and hang tight. We can do it!
XOXO Star

AMEN, Star! I slipped because of it. Dealing with family issues involves so many emotions. My key to getting stronger, is to ACCEPT the reality and stop fighting against it in the hopes it will become what I WANT it to be. You can't change others; you can only change yourself. I've been through the grieving and now my work involves the acceptance, what I do with the acceptance within my range of responsibility and letting the rest go. 'We' have no power over others. Acceptance is key imo, but the process of getting there is a difficult one. We try to avoid the pain of acknowledging certain things, but healing only can begin once we do.

That explains why the serenity prayer is so prominent in AA.


Love,

Slay

[Starfish1]

Newbies Nest

Thanks, Slay. I needed to be reminded of the serenity prayer today! I feel just like kradle and I would like to lock all the doors, keeping all my stressors away and just escape from my problems and drink my tea- but that is not what life is about.
I am off work for the veterans day holiday and have already had a bad morning and it's only 9:30 !
My plan is to do tend to some household chores this morning (no fun, but necessary- and if I don't do it I will be more stressed) BUT I am going to plan to do something fun for myself this afternoon. I know that just anticipation of having something nice for myself will pick my spirits up. Hope my nest mates can do the same for themselves. All we gotta do is get thru today.

[Alcoholic]

Newbies Nest

I had no energy yesterday, couldn't get out of bed. I thought, maybe if I had a glass of wine, I could get up and do chores...but I didn't drink and just read in bed all day.

Today, still no energy. But I think I'll still just read in bed again.

Chores? They can wait. If I wait long enough, maybe my husband will do them....

[dstro]

Newbies Nest

sounds like a plan al :-) but u know us men can't do chores as good as u women

[Dogwood Blossom]

Newbies Nest

Awwww.....the nest seems familiar once again, and comfortable. Dealing with the important issues of how to get through this day without drinking. I am doing Day 4....again! Today I have a deep disgust of AL. I am praying that stays with me for awhile. I don't like how it leaves me with my head in a big black cloud, unable to focus or think or really do much of anything. The simplest of task can leave me with my head spinning! The nest is a good place to be, most of the time. I'm going to try to catch up and get familiar with everyone.

[Catbuddy]

Newbies Nest

Alcoholic;1409949 wrote: I had no energy yesterday, couldn't get out of bed. I thought, maybe if I had a glass of wine, I could get up and do chores...but I didn't drink and just read in bed all day.

Today, still no energy. But I think I'll still just read in bed again.

Chores? They can wait. If I wait long enough, maybe my husband will do them....

Congrats on sayingn no! I have been experiencing terrible exhaustion during my entire quit. Some days I do just hunker down in bed (on the weekends, when no work to go to). It's hard to feel physically down and not drink (for me, anyway). I hope you feel better soon, and enjoy the comforts of quiet time.

Cat

[Catbuddy]

Newbies Nest

Dogwood, I love your dog's nose. SOOOO cute. Brings a smile to my face every time I see your avatar.

Cat

[Nanette]

Newbies Nest

Bennii - When I first came to this site it was the middle of the night and I was sure I was going to do it! I woke up the next day full of hope and resolve. Day 2 lasted until 4:00 and then that was that. I drank for the whole week until Friday morning when I had a little mental breakdown. I went and told my boss, went to the Dr. and went to Addictions Services all in one day. That was my new Day 1. Telling people has made this time different.

Thought for today: Think of it like a road trip to a very special place (over the river and through the woods to Grandmothers house). When you leave your husband says not pee breaks today. Did everyone go pee? Yes, Yes, Yes. Well along the way we need to go p and we are hanging on and hanging on so we don't make Pappa Bear (Sugar Bear for Honey BooBoo fans) upset again. We wonder if we are going to burst! I can't do it! you yell out , "I HAVE TO P". Well you pull over and go. Need relief brain sees: Wow nice bathroom, quiet, marble counter tops, two ply paper, pretty wallpaper...but then Don't have to go anymore brain sees: the smell and the dirty floors, it is fake glue on marble etc. You get back in your vehicle and carry on to that wonderful place that you started to.

Point: Sometimes we will stop for a p because the urge is just overwhelming. When we first get there it all looks so nice because we know relief is in sight. However once there for a while, after we have found our relief, we start to see it for what it is...a public rest stop on the highway of life. (Oh that was a good one). We must have a plan. Next time I won't drink a pot of coffee before we leave and bring a bottle of water for the trip. And when Pappa Bear asks if I went p, I won't say yes when I didn't.

Well that is my thought for today. Bennii you are still checking in here so I am happy for that. Let us be your clean, nice smelling "Rest stop".

[allankay]

Newbies Nest

Kradle123;1409631 wrote: :sighbubble:
Sorry to be a speed bump...
Just feel low...
very down...defeated...

six months on the 20th with some slips...big sigh...
Nothing seems to be changing...

except my skin looks better...

Kradle, hang in there.

I dont know how about you but when I feel low I remind myself that this is part of life and AL doesnt solve anything. It gives me pride and hope. It is like passing an exam on your own rather than going for an easy way out like cheating.

Also I am sure that you look much younger internally too. If only your liver, heart, kidneys...could talk, they would say a big "Thank you".

ALLAN