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    Newbies Nest

    Prairie! Another one we haven't heard from in a while. This is such a caring place. I love it when peeps notice and check in.
    :notes:
    we are human beings with alcohol problems not alcoholics with problems caused by drinking

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      Newbies Nest

      yeah - I PM'd prairie a while ago, but haven't heard anything...I hate that, I get worried.

      K9 - glad your'e feeling better - I don't get sick too often but got that cold a few weeks back and it was awful! And even when I do get sick, I usually just push through it - but I think there is a particularly nasty version out there this year....(although I'm all over your flu shot theory...I wouldn't get one if they paid me!)

      Fin, don't give up yet - you might be surprised at your wife's response when you chat with her about it...I know I'd encourage mine to do it - a bucket list kind of thing, ya know? And besides, it would be advantageous to already have had the experience - when you take your family with you in the future...you'll know what to expect - have all the kinks worked out.

      And I'm quite sure you already know this, but I probably wouldn't even "go there" with the comment about putting her through school and now it's your turn...:lol3:
      ~

      Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.

      Sobriety date: Sept 26, 2011

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        Newbies Nest

        Lola! That comment could get ugly in a hurry! Out would come the 467 hours of labor having HIS children....the cooking, the cleaning, the taxi service......yep, best leave that one alone, Fin! But I have a hunch you are smarter than that! I'm already thinking of ways to fund it! Take up a collection from folks who wish they had the kahonees to do it. This may be a dumb question, but does the GC have internet/cell phone coverage so you could Facetime your way thru it? (with us along, too?) B
        All you gotta do, is get thru this day. AF 1/20/2011
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          Newbies Nest

          Byrdlady;1410660 wrote: Lola! That comment could get ugly in a hurry! Out would come the 467 hours of labor having HIS children....the cooking, the cleaning, the taxi service......yep, best leave that one alone, Fin! But I have a hunch you are smarter than that! I'm already thinking of ways to fund it! Take up a collection from folks who wish they had the kahonees to do it. This may be a dumb question, but does the GC have internet/cell phone coverage so you could Facetime your way thru it? (with us along, too?) B
          I was thinking if I could get our daughter into a camp in July for at least a couple weeks, that would help. I was also just talking to a good friend of mine over lunch who runs a local restaurant and the word over there is that they'll pass along some meals. How cool is that?! She also wants to go to Maine to see some friends of hers. Maybe she takes my son along while daughter away at camp?

          I donno...it still seems like a really-really long time to be separated. That said, it could be an excellent reboot on our 19 years of marriage. I would have a satellite phone with me, but it'll only work out of the canyon -- in most places. These phones require 80% of the skyline to be within site to lock in service. A mile down in a canyon only provides a slot of sky view. Anyway, lola, you could be right...she might just say, "go for it." Time will tell.
          Achieved Goals: Getting Back to Working on This Project!
          Goal In Progress...1 YEAR

          Instructions on posting to Roll Call:

          Go forward boldly and unafraid

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            Newbies Nest

            Angry and Weak

            Sorry i've been away. The BSH is still running wild in my head. But fell into a dark place, and now find myself back on Day 1. Byrdie, Lola, thank you for your wise words in your pm's earlier this week.

            But right now I am feeling both huge anger and immense weakness. Anger at my weakness, and weak at the fact that i just flipped, fell. Have started a new thread about it so youse can read it there.

            Anyways... hiya nesters... Here we go again...

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              Newbies Nest

              Slaythefear;1410432 wrote: Lola quote: "I don't even know who that person was."


              That's a big one, Lola. I've hated this drunk person for a long time. I lost who I was before I started drinking and then continually erased her with alcohol and the resulting bad choices. It saddened me that others didn't really get to know the real me...and yet...on it went. NO MORE! It's time to let her back out of the box flaws and all, but real and not intoxicated and wasting life in a blur making bad decisions.

              ODAT the transformation back to her has begun. I'm beginning to feel her again under all that weight. I like her.
              Yeah, we like her too

              Good post Slay. Resonates here. I'm wondering whether there is another me, one who was there years and years ago, who is not unlike the me of today, but who is a little bit more open, more confident, more self-assured and who does not live with a committee of voices in the head continually putting him down. A committee that gets a hell of a lot louder if i have to live with the dregs of last nights wine swilling about in my brain cells.

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                Newbies Nest

                RC! I was just wondering about you. I was scouring Roll Call, etc. So glad to see you back. I'm on Day 2, so you're in "good" company. Let's get back on this horse together, aye?
                Achieved Goals: Getting Back to Working on This Project!
                Goal In Progress...1 YEAR

                Instructions on posting to Roll Call:

                Go forward boldly and unafraid

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                  Newbies Nest

                  Looka here, RC....gaining experience is NOT failing or falling! Between Kuya and I, we have 9127 Day 1's!! I tried in earnest to quit for a full year after finding this place! Please don't be in a dark place, because it only takes a couple of AF days and you will feel right as rain again. It's not a cliff you fall off! You can get back up! I am so happy you're here...settle in on beside yer old buddy and I'll get Lav to pass the butt Velcro. Dick Head is a mighty opponent....but he can be overcome! Every single one of us started with Day 1. I am very proud of you for recognizing it sooner than later (like I did....I gave it a valiant fight). You've landed in the best possible place....hugs, Byrdie
                  All you gotta do, is get thru this day. AF 1/20/2011
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                    Newbies Nest

                    thanx guys

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                      Newbies Nest

                      RC:

                      just look how many AF days you've had and your liver has had time to rest. Why focus on the negative? It's like a baby learning to walk, he falls once, doesn't mean he fails, he just gets back and walks again... You know what worked the first time, so you know what will work again and what won't. So kudos! Just keep running w courage, rc!
                      Alcoholic (or Ally)

                      "Only a fool knows everything.
                      A wise man knows how little he knows."

                      Please feel free to block/ignore my posts through your control panel.

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                        Newbies Nest

                        RunningCourage;1410690 wrote: Yeah, we like her too

                        Good post Slay. Resonates here. I'm wondering whether there is another me, one who was there years and years ago, who is not unlike the me of today, but who is a little bit more open, more confident, more self-assured and who does not live with a committee of voices in the head continually putting him down. A committee that gets a hell of a lot louder if i have to live with the dregs of last nights wine swilling about in my brain cells.
                        I think most people who drink have those voices, RC, and most people in general. We live in a harsh judgmental world that is marketing us programs on a daily basis to undermine loving ourselves for who we really are inside. We have to learn to shut it all off and get in touch with our core being. Those voices come from many directions and some you should listen to and make the appropriate changes so YOU like and are true to yourself. Others, just like the AL brain, need to be told to go to hell as lies. I started a transformation thread not long ago because I am working toward ridding myself of all these ghosts and issues and being my own best friend and advocate. Weed through what YOU are unhappy with and not what others are unhappy with and don't put yourself under that perfectionist profile pressure. It's a killer. Who decides what is perfect for you and what makes you happy? YOU do. You'll find him when you stop listening to the bs and listen to your core. It's in there. It's a process, though.

                        "Love yourself instead of abusing yourself." Karolina Kurkova

                        After reading your creative posts, I pegged you as an over thinker/deep thinker...I can relate to that. You probably feel things a bit deeper than some as well that can be part of a depression. It's the nature of that creative brain. Try to find the benefit in that side. It's a gift you have if you don't turn it against yourself.

                        Maybe I should start a thread about self esteem. I've mentioned it before, but I've been a bit preoccupied with life battles. Drinking is a symptom of deeper issues in most cases.

                        I've, also, found some relief in working the serenity prayer...the acceptance is so hard, but it is mandatory, imo.

                        Love,

                        Slay
                        Rule your mind or it will rule you. It is from a thought that an action grows. :bat

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                          Newbies Nest

                          Byrdlady;1410692 wrote: Looka here, RC....gaining experience is NOT failing or falling! Between Kuya and I, we have 9127 Day 1's!! I tried in earnest to quit for a full year after finding this place! Please don't be in a dark place, because it only takes a couple of AF days and you will feel right as rain again. It's not a cliff you fall off! You can get back up! I am so happy you're here...settle in on beside yer old buddy and I'll get Lav to pass the butt Velcro. Dick Head is a mighty opponent....but he can be overcome! Every single one of us started with Day 1. I am very proud of you for recognizing it sooner than later (like I did....I gave it a valiant fight). You've landed in the best possible place....hugs, Byrdie
                          Hmmm..."right as rain" along with my marketed programs...sure is sounding like the matrix theme around here.
                          Rule your mind or it will rule you. It is from a thought that an action grows. :bat

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                            Newbies Nest

                            Fin...sounds to me like you have a very good motive for staying AF...a reward from the wife? One thing is for sure, you'll figure it out a lot better without your braincells soaked in alcohol.
                            Rule your mind or it will rule you. It is from a thought that an action grows. :bat

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                              Newbies Nest

                              Slay...is 'right as rain' yours? Ooops, sorry for the patent infringment, if it's good, I just run with it!

                              Joanna...Welcome to the nest, did you get your question answered about deleting a thread? Unfortunately, the IT duties ALWAYS seem to fall on me.....eheheh. I am the LEAST technical person here. I have heard others say that you can't delete a thread, but I could be wrong..you can delete a post, but not sure about the other. I see you have some posts under your belt, what brings you by? We are glad you found us!!

                              Super Sober Vibes going out tonight....tomorrow you will be so glad you did! Byrdie
                              All you gotta do, is get thru this day. AF 1/20/2011
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                                Newbies Nest

                                Hey

                                Thank you. The words mean much.

                                Just heading over to roll call, Fin. Here we go...

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