Newbies Nest

[Andrew_CN]

Newbies Nest

congrats JJ -13 days...wow...how fantastic...! Well done indeed!

Had to comment on the housewives discussion...we don't get those sorts of shows on regular television here in China..and China produced programmes generally do not show much alcohol use..but when I have been in the US or or other countries where those sorts of shows have been on, I certainly have noticed that everyone seems to be drinking all the time..and not the cheap stuff that I drink either! Seems to unconsciously encourage a line of thought that continuous alcohol consumption is good..and socially acceptable...so long as it is the good stuff! Strange... But I can see how it could give a strong subversive message that would be dangerous to...well...people like me...

It is now 5:50 pm and I still haven't had a drink since breaking down at noon...and I'm still staring that bottle in the face until at least 6:30 pm..but I will win again today, I know...although I am now shaking quite a bit (James Bond could use me right now to make his martini)... BUT I know that if I face up to it and continue to pay the price..I will survive and win in the end....

Thanks everyone!

[Andrew_CN]

Newbies Nest

ugh..made it to 645..then drank much more than I should have too quickly....sigh...the demons are hard to stare down..but at least I am getting out of the place now for dinner without AL, but I probably shouldn't have drunk so much so quickly after I made it past my deadline...Two steps forward, one step back..but it is still progress, so I remain resolute...just reinforces how much hold this poison has on us! Hope to make sure that when I get home after dinner, I will keep the intake to a minimum.

Hope and warm wishes to everyone on this Friday evening...and for the weekend as well!

[kuya]

Newbies Nest

TRY not to have any more tonight Andrew, you have cut down a lot in a short time but you can do these few days, just a few now.

:goodjob:

[Mick]

Newbies Nest

Andrew..your comments are right...when you look around and actually see how many people drink, it is a massive issue...unfortunately it is socially accepted....as was smoking.Lots of people drink, sensibly,safely, within the limits,not to excess......but what do those phrases actually mean??they are just man made labels to allow acceptance.
Anyway on a more personal level, try to minimise your alcohol intake...might be good to set up a challenge chart and keep a diary..A challenge chart is where you break your day into manageable chunks and set a target..if you hit it green line it..if you dont write what you had in red. Next day do the same..try and keep to your targets, and try and plan how to beat the points that you failed on the day before..then you can make up a strategy..for example after 3 or 4 days you see that you cant do without a drink between 6 and 7. look at what you do at those times and vary it..lets say you go to dinner..ok change your dinner time.If you cant then try something else ..drink water before you go out..any thing.
Hope this helps

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Good morning Nesters!

It's a brisk 23 degrees F here ~ very frosty

Andrew, use the drink tracker here on the site & make sure your progress is forward each day

Mick, your are everywhere these days :H

I have another busy day ahead so I should get going. Wishing everyone a great AF Friday. Get those plans squared away for an AF weekend

Lav

[Mick]

Newbies Nest

Yep Lav ...sure am..just nosing around seeing what Ive missed!!

[lolab]

Newbies Nest

so we have been celebrating kuya and allan on 3 MONTHS!!! And Star and Cat for 2 months! And nanette on one month!!! We are on a roll - nice way to head into the weekend. :-)

Congratulations to each and every person who is here - reading or posting - because you are either contemplating or have already set a plan in motion to do the best thing you've ever done for yourself...this can be hard at times, but it's not impossible...that's for sure.

Andrew, I apologize up front, if this has already been discussed...i was a vodka drinker and decided it was wise to taper down - but when I did, I tapered with beer. It kept some alcohol in my system, but wasn't something I was so tempted to overindulge with. I just knew that if I had that vodka bottle in the house, and just tried to cut back on the amount, i would have been doing the same thing I'd been trying to do for years, that didn't work. Just have it in the house and control how much I drank. I told myself that I would do that every single time I went to the store and bought a bottle....said "it'll just be here for me to have just a little - every once in awhile...." then I'd wake up in the middle of the night with the bottle half gone and my head screaming "you just can't have it in the house!" I've been sober over a year, and I STILL don't know if I'd leave it alone if it were here....and I'm not gonna find out!

It sounds like you have the support of your girlfriend, and I'm glad that she'll be around when you stop completely. We're all pulling for you.

So - I'm off, but will most likely be back in a bit. :-)

lola

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Nanette...on behalf of the entire Newbies Nest, please accept this small token of a MAJOR achievement! :day5: Stella (flower) will have to find her own! I am so proud of what you have done, not only in pulling in 30 days, but sharing your story along the way. You never know that the words you write could be helping someone thru his/her next 15 minutes. Feel free to share a few words with us about this morphing experience!
Jingles, Day 13 was a huge day for me...that was the day I realized this wasn't impossible and that is huge in our world. I am so happy for you...STAY the course and you will be getting your hat here soon!!
Emily...I try to look at the tv in 2 ways...they are actors. They are acting as if they are enjoying their drinks. Just as when the look really hurt when they get shot. Secondly, after a time, those housewives start CAT FIGHTING. It shows on them, too. I don't think they are 'getting away with it' like we think they are. I bet a good many of them get going a little early, just like we did. And secondly....actually Allan made this very good point: Sober is the new drunk. Just like we thought smoking was cool in the 60's we are going to look back on these days and realize an awful lot of people have or are developing PROBLEMS with AL. I see the romaticing of AL to be our next big epidemic...if it isn't already. We were just early adopters!!
Also, like you, I operate out of fear. When a drink starts to look refreshing on tv, I remember the times where I looked really refreshing...like falling into a ditch full of water in a cocktail dress at a company meeting. Or hanging over the toilet....(insert nightmare here). So I do use that when I need a jolt of reality. Everyone is a little different, but for me, FEAR works really well. One drink is my ticket back to that ditch...NO THANKS!
Andrew...you are doing great. I remember what Lola is talking about when she was tapering down...great advice there. When I tried tapering down, I drank MORE out of panic!! It was just awful....(eventually just had to go cold turkey) my hat is off to you for picking a date and working your plan. We will ALL be with you on Tuesday when you take the plunge. It is NOT a bad thing, you are about to feel better than you have in years!! There is nothing to be afraid of...you can trust me on that one.
Well done everyone! Friday is just another day...not a free pass to BoozeVille. If you got thru the last 15 minutes you can get thru the next. XXOO, Byrdie

[nurdl]

Newbies Nest

Sober IS the new Drunk

:band2:

just love this phrase
~n

[Starfish1]

Newbies Nest

Thanks for the visual about comparing the sight of people drinking to that of mainstreaming heroin, Kuya. That's a good one.

Another thing I do when I see those actors on tv drinking one after another is to make myself realize that they are really NOT drinking alcohol. Its prolly just apple juice or non alcoholic beer that's really in that glass. Otherwise, they couldn't do their job. Then i imagine how I would be functioning if I had drunk that much- not a pretty sight.
And Emily, these days, if I watch television, I try to stick to those that don't show people drinking. I know that's not easy, but it is doable and not as much temptation.

I am so proud of all of us. Jingle, I am happy that you are finding day 13 to be a good one. Byrdie calls it the magical time for many.

To those of you struggling after having a couple weeks or even 30 days under your belts, I have been there too. I believe it was Lola, who, just a couple weeks ago reminded me that just after a tough period, a breakthrough follows. She is right :thanks: Lola! And Byrdie always says you hardly ever have 2 bad days in a row. :thanks: Byrdie

I am on day 61 today and woke up feeling stronger than ever. I feel great. I have lost about 10 pounds (with no exercise and no starving myself) and the whites of my eyes are actually bright white, not streaky red.

To those of you around the 30 day mark and feeling "flat". Dottie, Cat and I had the same experience. So did Allan. We all got our heads together, and with the help of one of Byrdie's infamous posts, we realized that this is perfectly normal. Sometimes you need to add a little something to your routine to spice it up a little bit. (Iron Man) AllanKay ran marathons :egad: I couldn't do that, but maybe you can consider some other goals to pursue (in addition to the non-drinking). Things to keep you busy and focused on helping yourself feel better and better. It really works. I am thinking about starting to try to walk daily.

Andrew, you rock. There is NO WAY I would be able to stare that bottle down like you are doing (and I was not even a vodka drinker- but I would take what i could get )

Have a great day all!

XOXO Star

[Starfish1]

Newbies Nest

Byrdie and I HAVE GOT to synchronize our watches. We cross post DAILY.

Nanette, Congratulations on your 30 days. I have been warming up my clappers since last night and they are HOT. Here is a BIG, WARM, :wd:

Byrdie, that is crazy how you and I were both typing posts about those tv "ACTORS" and their drinks. We think alike

[Milly333]

Newbies Nest

Good morning everyone....I have been away for quite some time, but now on day two....of course life has been hell due to my drinking....sneaking, lying, hiding,etc....family and friends and most importantly myself are pretty fed up....I look forward to your input and support...thank you for the opportunity to stay sober with you.

[Alcoholic]

Newbies Nest

Hello, nesters:

Hello to milley just joining in...

Andrew: What's shanghai like? Is it like New York? So do people actually drink alcohol during business meetings?! My dad is an attorney in Taiwan and I visited His office once. They do have alcohol at the executive conference room, like brandy, vodka, anything, you name it! I thought that was odd. It's so taboo here to have alcoholic drinks at work places that I was shocked to see that there.

[Starfish1]

Newbies Nest

:l Milly. We are so happy to have you with us. You have landed in the best possible spot if you are ready to quit drinking...AND....

You have already made it through Day 1- Congratulations!

You will find lots of love, support and good advice here in the nest. We have all been where you have been and really want to help!

Have you had a chance to read the My Way Out book? What is your plan for getting through this day alcohol free? When you have a chance, why don't you check out the toolbox link (see in my signature line). You will find lots of good ideas there.

:h and :thanks: for being here with us!

[Milly333]

Newbies Nest

Thx for the encouragement alc and star....I am recovering from cervical spine surgery so I cannot do a lot yet...lots of reading and soul searching. Today I am searching recipes for Christmas baking with my daughter, she will be doing most of the work,but it has become a tradition that she and I do together. She is such an inspiration for me to be sober. Very supportive and understanding. I feel so thankful for her. Ok., before I start weeping, I will sign off for now.....

beating the little creep