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    Newbies Nest

    daisy45;1424967 wrote: Right there with you Rooni; back today too! Let's just get through today and then we will do it all over again tomorrow.....
    Daisy, ok - it's me and you. Let's rack up those days, OK? And I could give a rat's ass that it's Christmas time. My friends will get over it. They only have to deal with the "fun" drunk me. I have to deal with the aftermath, which is truly hell on earth.

    I will look for you on the roll call EVERY DAY, Daisy!

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      Newbies Nest

      Rooni - first and foremost YOU ARE NOT AN IDIOT. Secondly, DON'T BE EMBARRASSED - bloody hell, this is tha last place any of us ought to feel embarrassed! So, You thought rationally. You thought, "hey, I've worked real hard at this. It's the holidays, let's allow ourselves a little slack." Absolutely. Of course. Why on earth not? And you tried it, just one ickle drink... and then WHAM BAM! it's like you never stopped in the first place.

      It's another learning notch. But do the proverbial picking yourself up and look back at where you came, what made you trip? Review the situation, look ahead - can you see where you want to be? OK. Now look inside yourself, can you figure where in you is the strength? (IT IS THERE!) What else might support Rooni's strength, desire and believe that Rooni can finally beat this? Try and bring these things close to you. It's not easy (and boy I didn't precisely have a 'party' tonight :H) but IT CAN BE DONE. And Rooni, you will do it.

      RC :l

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        Newbies Nest

        Daisy!!

        Bloody hell - was getting worried as to your whereabouts. SO good to see you back. :l

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          Newbies Nest

          Thank you, RC. You are so uplifting. It's nice that someone cares. I hate the beast, and he got the better of me last week. He was able to talk me into slipping. He's laughing and prancing around right now. He's so happy that I'm so miserable.

          Yes, I learned a lot. And most importantly, I learned that I want to be sober, happy, and in control of my life. I love who I am when I'm sober. I'm a better person when I'm sober. I can fulfill my dreams when I'm sober.

          Alcohol is soooo not worth it! It represents PAIN, SUFFERING, and DEATH for me.

          I'm back, and for that I am very grateful :-)

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            Newbies Nest

            rooniferd;1424974 wrote: Thank you, RC. You are so uplifting. It's nice that someone cares. I hate the beast, and he got the better of me last week. He was able to talk me into slipping. He's laughing and prancing around right now. He's so happy that I'm so miserable.

            Yes, I learned a lot. And most importantly, I learned that I want to be sober, happy, and in control of my life. I love who I am when I'm sober. I'm a better person when I'm sober. I can fulfill my dreams when I'm sober.

            Alcohol is soooo not worth it! It represents PAIN, SUFFERING, and DEATH for me.

            I'm back, and for that I am very grateful :-)
            Great! Get on the tracks. It's a bumpy ride... but your description of AL and what it represents and how it contrasts to who you want to be... well, I could've written that... and i believe the ride is worth it.

            Ready to roll? Here we go..........

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              Newbies Nest

              This increase in drinking after an extended period sober is biochemical and is the reason alcohol use increase over time. People on skid row didn't start there, they got there over a long time and probably many quits.

              Drinking occurs in three parts

              I drink,
              I drank
              I'm drunk.

              Recovery has only one

              I'm sober

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                Newbies Nest

                Thanks Byrdie,

                I've heard of hoarders, but cats? It's funny things like hoarding are definitely a mental illness. You hear of case after case, where the city came in and cleared everything out for health and safety reasons, and within months, everything is back, exactly as it was. Like it's their protective fortress or something.

                I have spent years, trying to avoid what seems unavoidable. I think you are right about a cold dose of reality, but he doesn't seem able to learn from experience. He did spend some time on the streets, when he was released from jail and was banned from the place he had been staying because of the 'incident'. I wasn't here then. And he just wasn't in his right mind and couldn't think what to do. It seems he can't remember how bad it was, shelters, the streets, etc. His hands were red for a month, from having suffered without gloves in the cold and wind.

                My biggest fear, is that he gets into another legal/court deal, where he can't leave the country until it is resolved and is here alone, wandering the streets, probably missing all his appointments, while I'm back home, helpless.
                AF since 12/2/12
                http://hamsnetwork.org/taper/

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                  Newbies Nest

                  Sorry, I got sidetracked with a phone call before I posted this last.

                  Welcome, welcome, welcome back rooni and daisy! I had the same experience: like after going AF for a while, I was making up for lost time. This last was the worst withdrawal, lasting up until yesterday, day 8. Never want to go through that again. I used to bounce back within 3 days. No more.

                  I loved the quote I got from Slay:" I have the urge, but I won't satisfy it; I can't satisfy it."

                  So glad you are all here. It's just another 'learning experience'......Don't we all have hundreds! Back on the horse again.....keep going forward. Hugs from all of us!
                  AF since 12/2/12
                  http://hamsnetwork.org/taper/

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                    Newbies Nest

                    Evening all,
                    went to the care conference today and he was OK but of course thought we were there to take him home?.sigh?but by the time we were ready to leave he was totally confused?probably wont even remember we were there?..I feel better after the meeting and know he is in the right place for as long as he can afford it...The support group meeting is Wednesday so I know that will help too.
                    Thanks for all the support I really do appreciate it..
                    Dottie
                    Dottie

                    Newbie's Nest

                    Tool Box
                    ____________
                    AF 9.1.2013

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                      Newbies Nest

                      :l :l :l for you Dottie.

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                        Newbies Nest

                        Hi Dottie,

                        Was wondering how it went. Maybe it's a blessing that he was more confused by the time you left. It would have been worse if you had to drive away with him desperately sad to be left behind, and fully conscious of it. The whole thing is so heartbreaking. Hugs from me, too.
                        AF since 12/2/12
                        http://hamsnetwork.org/taper/

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                          Newbies Nest

                          Took a little spin around google looking at how marijuana effects the brain and alternatives. It's clear why it advised against for your son as it brings on distorted perceptions and can cause hallucinations. All marijuana is not equal as you know. There are different families, some stimulants and some depressants. Also, street drugs are always questionable. Today there is so much garbage out there. Some types and people will get a calming effect and others anxiety type reactions. The only suggestions for alternatives were calming type techniques like yoga, meditation, calming herbs like passion flower, etc. or anti-anxiety drugs. Quite a few people suggested video games as an escape technique which plenty of them said they used pot for. Just like AL and definitely a part of this side of the fences problem. Sometimes people just don't want to be present in life. We can all relate to that, but he has to want to help himself and that can be a tough bridge. He may feel so down about his illness that he doesn't really care. How do you get someone to care or not want to escape? You can only lead them, then they have to drink.

                          Love ya.

                          Slay
                          Rule your mind or it will rule you. It is from a thought that an action grows. :bat

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                            Newbies Nest

                            Good evening Nesters,

                            Hope everyone is OK!

                            Dottie, it sounds like the facility is meeting your Dad's needs & to some extent yours as well. That's good news

                            RC, you survived? Should I tell Stella to come back home now? :H
                            We're all hapy for you.

                            almost free, how are you doing?

                            Welcome back Rooni!
                            Yuo now know what some of us have already figured out......no such thing as moderation once the off switch has broken. There may be a rare exception but I'm pretty sure they are few & far between. Stick around now, OK?

                            I need to get to sleep earlier tonight. Burning the midnight oil last night didn't do much good for me today
                            Wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!

                            Lav
                            AF since 03/26/09
                            NF since 05/19/09
                            Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

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                              Newbies Nest

                              A hug for you today, Dottie. If you've made it this far without a drink, you can make it further.

                              Roon, never feel embarrassed. Everybody's problems are important to them regardless of severity. It's still an issue you are dealing with.

                              Welcome back daisy.

                              Looks like the nest is filling up. Strength in numbers! We are a tough group. Shut off the program and slay the beast!

                              Hope I didn't forget anyone. Just doing a quick check in tonight.

                              Sleep well, or have a good day whichever side of the world you are on.
                              Rule your mind or it will rule you. It is from a thought that an action grows. :bat

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                                Newbies Nest

                                Morning nesters,

                                Early here - up at 5.30am... and at the very least it's a pain-free, hang-over free morning allowing me to do some studying before I take the long drive to work (long rive due to driving to my folks last night as that was my escape route - albeit an expensive one due to the cost of diesel in the fricking country).

                                Dark, cold and frosty. Perfect day to potter around the house... If only :H

                                RC

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