Newbies Nest

[Munro]

Newbies Nest

Well that's great! No lifting!

How's your son handling the move?

[almost free]

Newbies Nest

Well, it was really hard to get him moving this morning because he got high last night. I was getting more and more nervous, because I had already made plans with the delivery guy. I hate to be late, it really makes me nervous and at the same time, I didn't want to feed his nervousness. I know he was pretty nervous about the move.

Then there was the issue of whether there would be a key, and if he should just say, well, call me when you have a key and I'll come back with my check. Thankfully, I was able to re-arrange with both the people and the delivery guy for a little later, and thankfully they had the keys and everything went ok. Good thing I had the foresight to get cash out of the bank, because my son just looked at me blankly when I asked him if he had the cash to pay the delivery guy.

He didn't want to do any more today, and asked if we could just do the rest tomorrow, since he has the day off. No problem. So that's the plan, to finish moving in tomorrow. This would have all been a disaster if I had been drinking. So glad I was sober today. I also think everyone's good thoughts and prayers made a difference. Thanks to everyone.

[Munro]

Newbies Nest

I'll be praying that tomorrow goes off without a hitch and that you both are able to stay sober and get through.

[almost free]

Newbies Nest

Thanks Munro,

I know I will be sober, but I'm sure he won't be. He's pretty heavy into his pot. I've got everything organized, so all he will have to do is unload the car and put it in his room. I think he can manage that. Here's hoping......Oh, there's the phone. I should probably say good night for now......

[RunningCourage]

Newbies Nest

Morning Nesters,

Almost - glad today went without too much of a hitch and that tomorrow's part 2 of the move goes as smooth. Really good to hear that by the evening you're feeling more rested (is that the right word?) as opposed to stressed that can lead to the cravings of losing oneself in a bottle.

Munro - 10pm Saturday night and tucked up in bed. I'm still getting to grips with that one. I was there too last night and it felt like everyone else my age was out in the bars, clubs, gigs etc. But yesterday felt like I'd be shoe-horning my way into being out, when, perhaps, I should take it in my stride that, hey, tonight's Saturday night, not much is happening for me THIS saturday night. But hey that's ok. That is ok.

Morning the rest of youse and have a happy sober Sunday.

RC

[kuya]

Newbies Nest

Hi Munro ......well done on your first days, they are HARD but it starts to get easier. The sleeplessness is a pain........everyone has problems in this area and people use various remedies, Benadryl, tryptophan and melatonin, valerian. Remember that a few sober hours sleep is worth 8 hours coma drunk. Make sure you eat well and plenty, most cravings are hunger IMO and rest even if you can't sleep.

Hi Almost.....glad it went Ok. The main thing is you are sober.......good

Hi Arsey!

[almost free]

Newbies Nest

Great link, Kuya

Kuya, what a great link. It confirms everything I have read and come to believe about alcoholism. By the way, one of the two biochemical psychiatrists, whom Bill Wilson of AA consulted (and became good friends with) is non other than Dr. Abram Hoffer.

Dr. Hoffer is the doctor I wrote about in my posts about schizophrenia and using niacin to enable the patient to lead a normal life and be med free. Of course, at $400-$500 per month for psych meds, you can see why do everything to ignore and discount him. Niacin (non-flush) is about $12 per month. He treated over 5,000 patients, since 1952. There is an interview with him on doctor yourself.com, click on psychosis, non-drug.

[New Day]

Newbies Nest

Hi Almost.....you sound so much better today.....glad things went okay in the end yesterday. Will keep you in my thoughts for today as well
Munro......getting to sleep as a sober person is something our brain hasn't been used to in a long while. Even though it took me a couple of hours of restlessness before getting some sleep (and that was with over the counter sleep aids, valerian and melatonin)..... I was amazed at my energy level and alertness each day! I find that if I do some deep, slow breathing (as in yoga) it helped distract and relax my mind.

Here's to a great day....

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Good morning Nesters!

Overcast here today, a week of rain is on the way, oh well!

Almost, glad your moving weekend is almost over. Staying flexible to changes in plans really helps prevent a lot of unecessary stress

NewDay, it took me a very long time to develop more normal sleep patterns. Keep taking good care of yourself, you're doing all the right things

RC, how's your day going?? Hi Munro!

Wishing everyone a wonderful AF Sunday!
Lav

[Slaythefear]

Newbies Nest

Hello Nesters.

Almost free, I hope things turn out better than you expect. I know that will be a load off your mind. Bravo for staying AF through all of this. I know how hard that can be.

We are all struggling with things in our lives that can really make us want to pick up the bottle to escape or cope, but is that really going to solve the problem? Where will it lead?


My update: Stayed home and had a relaxing night with my girlfriend who came into town. Kradle, I miss her even more now. She is off to visit her mom in the hospital and we may or may not shop a little before she heads out of town. She is much more settled now in her life. So as she becomes settled, my life spirals into hell. lol Grant me the courage not to turn to the beast for release. It will not solve the problems.

Friday night, I get a text from my biggest problem that he wants to stop by and get a couple things he left here. I have already told him no further contact allowed with me. So, my suggestion was he could contact the police if he wanted the rest of his things and I'm sure the police would be glad to give him his few articles of clothing leftover and HIS POT he wants. Well, in the true violent temper that he has. He wound up picking me up by the shoulders and throwing me to the ground. I immediately called the cops, so he left. Unfortunately they weren't around to see the assault, but I did file a report. It was suggested I get a PPO filed, so that's another thing I have to attempt to do. The nerve of him wanting to come here to get his pot and a few things and thinking he can treat me that way. It's a painful situation, so it does make a person want to escape into a bottle. Can't go that direction, but you know your brain wants to YELL...ESCAPE, ESCAPE...it hurts too much. Time...more time for healing and a whole lot of bs I have to go through to get this man out of my life and off my financial responsibility. Also, angry at myself for allowing all this to happen at my age. Darn alcohol seized brain makes horrible decisions! DON'T let it ruin your life and cloud your judgement. The label should read, 'WARNING: DESTRUCTIVE TO YOUR LIFE AND REASONING CAPABILITIES" Not just while intoxicated, but when afterwards as your brain is not working properly from the effects of the poison.

I could just cry thinking about the mistakes I've made because of this toxic substance I allowed to take up residence in my life for several years. Not only have I not found that fountain of youth, but who is hiding the time machine?

Ok, update and rant over with. Waiting to hear from my gf to see if she'll be around or going home today.

Wishing you all strength to handle whatever life is throwing at you.

Love,

Slay

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Well done, everyone! Our first instinct is to RUN! (to the bottle) Slay, you are so right...it is a different way of thinking when you have to stop yourself and say...NO, sort thru it and THAT will make it go away. A totally different set of coping skills being used, ones we aren't used to, but they work pretty darn well!
RC...when I was in college back in the Pleisticine Period, I imagined that everyone else got to party every night with impunity. I was bitter at this notion, until I began to take notes of it. Everyone WAS partying, but in shifts....Susan (Loosy Goosy) partied on one night, her roommate (Mag the Hag) partied the next. But the appearance was that everyone else was wooping it up but me. Perception is a bitch sometimes....So you stayed in on a Sattidy night? It's ok. In the grand scheme of Sattidy nights, missing one ain't such a big deal. (yes, we say Sattidy in the The South).

Stay strong today everyone!!! There ain't no answers in the bottom of that bottle...I checked it out thoroughly. Every hour of every day you can put between you and AL is GOOD!!!

Have a peaceful head day!!! Byrdie

[almost free]

Newbies Nest

Oh Slay,

What a nightmare you are in! I always wonder when I hear people say that pot is harmless. I always hear how mellow, etc. it makes you. I never smoked it myself, but my experience has been similar to yours; extreme temper and hostility, to even suggest that things are getting out of control. He's now smoking before work, coming home at lunch to get high, and after work as well. All day long on days off. This is not going to fly with his new roomates. And after so much expense and exhausting effort to find him a place.....

I felt so much better yesterday evening, the best I have felt since I got sober. Just feeling great and in a great mood. Having my tea and enjoying it. No cravings for AL. I have some previous posts, relating how day 1 of the move went.

Well, I was awakened last night at 3 am with my son clinking the glass and making noise, to clean his new bong. It happened the night before, too. I told him that this is not going to fly with his new housemates and that maybe, the fact that he can't get up in the morning, nor manage a simple move, with tons of help, MAYBE, there is a problem. As you said in an earlier post, the frontal assault will get your face ripped off.

Extreme hostility, abusive language, complete denial.....ZERO gratitude. I told him, well, after tomorrow, you won't have to put up with anything from anyone. You are your own man. You make whatever decisions you want, only remember, YOU wil face the consequences of those decisions. We are all done. Your mental health is back, you have a good job and a good place to live; decent people, affordable and close to work. Close to everything; market, laundry, mini-mart, pizza place, barber, etc. If you lose it all, blame nobody but yourself. I've given you the best advice I can, as your mother and you have ignored all of it.

Just want this day to be over. Don't want a scene or anything else. Just load up the car, take him over there, let him unload it and get him out of here.

Please everyone, keep those good thoughts and prayers coming, at least for one more day. They seem to have really helped yesterday. Just want to get through today.

Slay, you are in my thoughts and prayers, too, with all you are going through. Stay close and let us know how you are doing. We all want to be there for you.

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

There is a lot of heavy lifting going on for so many people...ALL of our thoughts and prayers are going out to wish you strength.

We do have so much to be grateful for....our 2 good arms and 2 good legs, and a few good marbles still rolling around in our heads...hard as it is, try and do something good for yourself and someone else today...all of these tough patches will pass (mercifully, they do).

Don't give in to Dick Head no matter what and no matter who!! Byrdie

[Starfish1]

Newbies Nest

Roonie!!! Congratulations on Day 7!!!! You yourself are doing some serious beast kicking and we are all so proud of you!! You are showing the beast and everyone else just how it's done. The Nebies nest owes you a full moon Roonie, but my home computer is not cooperating. May I please have a stand in mooner so Roonie can be properly awarded??
Thanks and congrats again, Roonie!!!

P.S. I hope Santa brings me a new computer for Christmas!

[Nanette]

Newbies Nest

Here is Stella on Day 45! Doesn't she look beautiful? lanter:

For all you New Newbies, Stella is my Amaryllis Sober Buddy. She was planted on the same day that I decided to go AF. We have come a long way in the last 45 days. Many ups and downs just like you are experiencing now. I wanted to remember that I would not water Stella with poison so why would I water myself with poison. :yuk:

The last day that I posted was on December 9th. The nest was on page 2833, now it is on page 2866! mgThat is a lot of reading to catch up on. It is so great to see all the activity on here. New people, regulars and in betweens.

Munro - welcome to you. I read something here (maybe Byrdie) that said our "Off switch is broken". This phrase has stuck with me and describes my drinking to a "t".

Shezzi - (I think I spelled that wrong) - 6 weeks, good job.

Dottie - What kind of flowing plant did you end up with? Is it you that also goes to Curves, like me? Well Like I need to get back to? I know you will enjoy your 2 weeks off. Sounds like you have a healthy AF plan in place.

Irie - Congratulations on your seven days a little late.

New Day - DAY 10! (Day 11 today) YAY you. Remember the difference between Day 1 and Day 10 is more than just a 0. :exclaim:

Moni - 30 Days! Seems like just yesterday I saw you fly in here!

Almost - Oh the heart ache our children can bring. As well as the greatest joy. I want to share something that I tried for a while. It really helped my relationship with my kids. I had to stop stating the obvious. My daughter would say to me "No sh!t Sherlock!" I thought one day about my situation with my kids, I prayed on it and the thought, "Stop stating the obvious." came into my head. We think it isn't obvious to our kids because they are choosing actions that make it look like they don't get it. Sometimes they get it and chose the action anyways. Why, instant gratification? Fun? They have something to learn from choosing the wrong actions? Mental illness? We don't know. Once I started doing this (trust me this did not happen over night, I have been "stating the obvious for a very very long time), it helped. I actually thank you because you reminded me that I need to try to get back to this. I have been doing this again. Have a good move and I am saying prayers for you and your family.

Max - Welcome. I know you will find checking in here helpful as I do.

RC - 2 weeks, 14 days, YAY you. Re; your post about doing acts of Kindness, I want to share the following with you..... I am a FACEBOOK nut! I actually started an event that is named Christmas Cheer. I have invited all my friends to watch for opportunities to do random acts of kindness when they are out and about. Then they post there experience and we all can get a warm fuzzy feeling and remember what Christmas is all about. eace:What a response. People have invited their friends ..... I am hoping we will go Global! Some have posted the acts of kindness they themselves have received. WIN WIN!

Byrdie - I am a knitter and crocheter and it is funny how excited I get when I meet another person doing the same types of things. BTW, I don't know you but I like who you are. Keep up the good work you do in your life.

Overit and Pauly welcome!

Well just a personal note. I am so thankful I found this website. It is funny how knowing that I would have to post Day 1 again stops me from having a drink! I have tried before and failed. This is the only difference this time so I give lots of credit to all of you reading and posting here. Thank you again for being here. Wait a minute, I haven't posted any smiley's. What am I thinking. I will go back and do that now. :shocked:

Ok, there we go. Ta Ta for now. Attached files [img]/converted_files/2007906=7249-attachment.jpg[/img]