Newbies Nest

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Of course!!!!!
The holidays are nice & all but always a lot of extra work - Bah Humbug :H :H

Hang in there Allan

[Slaythefear]

Newbies Nest

Almost, I understand. It's hard for me to watch suffering. I've never been any good at just standing back, but that is a bit of my problem in my life as well as something I enjoy doing.

Congrats to the mile marker setters.:goodjob:

Allan, seems pretty normal to me from what I've been witnessing this year here and elsewhere. There can be a sort of loneliness with Christmas. For me, I think it's because it is so different in my life than it was years ago. It stresses so many people out and others feel more alone. It reminds me of loss I've had in my life. I could definitely live WITHOUT it! Here again, it's Christmas and I'm going through another loss. It will not go down in my memories as a favorite time of year.

Hope the job isn't stressing you too much. We seem to float from highs to lows. So happy about something one day and later we're not so happy about the same thing.

Brydie, hope you feel well again soon. I hope those weren't Stella's eggs. When I found out I was pregnant with my daughter, I ate some chicken that wasn't fully cooked and got salmonella food poisoning. For a week, I thought so this is what pregnancy is like? OMG!!! Finally called the doctor...oops! A round of antibiotics and I was back to normal morning sickness. I don't envy you!


Well, I'm resorting to a stronger pain medicine today. My back is killing me from being body slammed. Christmas memories...

There is no solution in escape.

Slay

[New Day]

Newbies Nest

Congratulations JingleJo on your 30 days!

Great job! I'll bet you feel amazing today. :goodjob:

I had a moment last evening when everyone was in the same room watching TV, and they were all there for a long time (at least an hour before anyone moved....) and I thought if I had been drinking, I'd be experiencing anxiety, wondering when they were all going to leave the room so that I could refill my wine glass without making that trip to the bar on my own (none of them would have been drinking on a Sunday evening). It was a relief to sit there with my cup of tea and not have that worry.

I wouldn't have been able to be at this point if it wasn't for the fine people here. :thanks:

Byrdie .... I hope you are feeling better soon.

Almost ... I hope you are taking care of yourself now. You've gone above and beyond what most parents would be able or willing to do given the circumstances.

To everyone else, no matter what stage of AF you are at .... keep at it .... the freedom from wondering how to hide the next drink and keep the stash supplied is such a relief!

Before I leave.... I wrote a post earlier this afternoon, and then when I hit "submit" the system said I wasn't signed it .... does it time out after awhile? This isn't the first time I've lost a post this way .... and I didn't have time to rewrite it. Any idea what I'm doing wrong?

[New Day]

Newbies Nest

Congratulations JingleJo on your 30 days!

Great job! I'll bet you feel amazing today. :goodjob:

I had a moment last evening when everyone was in the same room watching TV, and they were all there for a long time (at least an hour before anyone moved....) and I thought if I had been drinking, I'd be experiencing anxiety, wondering when they were all going to leave the room so that I could refill my wine glass without making that trip to the bar on my own (none of them would have been drinking on a Sunday evening). It was a relief to sit there with my cup of tea and not have that worry.

I wouldn't have been able to be at this point if it wasn't for the fine people here. :thanks:

Byrdie .... I hope you are feeling better soon.

Almost ... I hope you are taking care of yourself now. You've gone above and beyond what most parents would be able or willing to do given the circumstances.

To everyone else, no matter what stage of AF you are at .... keep at it .... the freedom from wondering how to hide the next drink and keep the stash supplied is such a relief!

Before I leave.... I wrote a post earlier this afternoon, and then when I hit "submit" the system said I wasn't logged in, even though I had before I started........ does it time out after awhile? This isn't the first time I've lost a post this way .... and I didn't have time to rewrite it. Any idea what I'm doing wrong?

[New Day]

Newbies Nest

Oh, and now it double posts! Sorry about that!

[RunningCourage]

Newbies Nest

Hey Allan - yeah hang in there, mate. It is very trying innit? I have pangs (thought pangs / emotional pangs - - not physical ones) that are very strong... and SO MUCH about Christmas SEEMS to be connected with, associated with having a drink. Even the Christmas tunes and Christmas lights and watching folks with all their many bags of Christmas shopping, and the cold and dark evenings, and the thought that, "hey! I get a break from work this time of year - reeeellllllllaaaaaxxxxxxxxxxxxx!" ALL have a tinge of "doesn't something go with this? Like AL?"

But it doesn't. And it needn't. For so may of us on here this will be our first Christmas trying to truck through with genuine merriment without the aid of the merry juice. I don't think it'll be easy. Hasn't been thus far. But I just think we (well, I) have to do it.

Allan - you're real good at being grateful at who you are now being AL free and what you can do to stay sober. It is in part a mind game - perhaps especially this first Christmas (I'll let the likes of Lav and Byrdie vouch, I'm a newbie in all respects) - but one of your strongest assets Mr Key, is your strength of will, of character. If ever a person had to epitomise the theory "mind over matter" you'd be sure in for a shout.

The upside of being a bit/very/totally gloomy is that you can come on here and vent that gloominess and we will all embrace it. Nothing like folks struggling together, huddling together.

Bah humbug indeed! :H

[Overit44]

Newbies Nest

Newday-I seem to time out also, without notice. Also, I understand what you are saying about that anxiety. Even though my husband drinks, I could run circles around him and felt insecure in that he was watching me or judging me. When I would wake at 2AM and drink 1/2 pint to get sleepy again I would have to pay attention and ditch the bottle so he wouldn't find it in the AM. He still has no idea how much I was drinking there at the end. He also doesn't know that the last 2 mondays when I called in sick to work I had hangovers, not the flu or cramps like I let on.

[kuya]

Newbies Nest

JJ ...... Just sign back in.....the post is usually still there

Allan, the Xmas glums affect everyone, don't stress it matey

[Overit44]

Newbies Nest

Allan-this will be my first Holiday without the merriment of a cocktail. I completely understand and there is such pressure. I'm a bah-humbug also.

[allankay]

Newbies Nest

RC. I agree with you completely. Emotional pangs are tough. I usually spend Christmas with family but this time around I have to work through the holidays with Christmas Day, Boxing Day and New Year off. Which mean I will be pretty much alone, as everyone else is also going away. So feeling a little lonely and overwhelmed with responsibilities at work is a big factor. I find that working out to a point of numbness helps a little. It may sound sadistic but running to a point where your feet feel like jelly make me feel better. May be it’s my new addiction. At least it’s free and healthier.

Hi Kuya. Nice to see you. I guess the upside is that my lows are never as deep as they used to be. What are you planning for Christmas and New Year? I need to live vicariously through someone this holiday season.

Overit44, welcome to the forum. Its going to be the first Christmas sober for me too. So I guess we need to wait and see how it goes. Fingers crossed.

[Overit44]

Newbies Nest

Allan-I have always been a gym rat and just starting to try and be a runner. I really like that I put a toll on my body and I don't have to think while I do it, I just get into a rhythm, find my breathing and go. I hurt my knee on T-giving though so it's been a few weeks. I tried it out last Thursday with no pain so I need to start again. Your times are great!

[rooniferd]

Newbies Nest

One of the last Christmases my Mom was alive, I showed up hungover as a goat. I was late because I couldn't stop puking. I also had to wrap all the presents that I had bought drunk at the mall the day before. I get there and was absolutely misersable. I sat in the chair closest to the bathroom in case I needed to run for it. I could barely eat the lunch that my mom had spent hours preparing. I told my family that I didn't feel well. As soon as it was over I rushed back home and started drinking again just to deal with it.....

I will always regret that day. It could have been a very special day with my mother and family, but it turned into a nightmare. Why? Cuz I had to drink.

I can't go back in time and change things, but I know one thing is for certain. I will be sober this Christmas, and I will be there for my family.

[New Day]

Newbies Nest

Sorry guys.....I was so positive this afternoon, so I can't really explain what happened a few hours later.....but I succumbed to joining my hubby with a glass of wine just before dinner. He of course has just the glass......I have to refill mine....AAHHHH...I was doing so well!
I guess I missed it too much. So tomorrow begins another day one. Why does that make me feel like such a failure when I've had more AF days than ever in the last 10 or 15 years?

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Staying sober through the holidays is not as tough as you may think everyone
YOU decide that you are not going to drink, stick to your commitment. Take your focus off of AL, make it much less important. Think of it as the poison it actually is & refuse to to that stuff in your body again. That's what I've been doing ~ give it a try

Wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!
Lav

[Caper]

Newbies Nest

New One.... you're not a failure. You are like the rest of us... susceptible to moods and the holidays and whatever other triggers us into thinking we can have just one... Please try to focus on the fact that you have had more AF days than ever in the last 10 to 15 years. Good for you. Be proud and build on that success! I disagree with Lavande... staying sober through the hoildays IS tough for those of us trying to do it for the first time. But it is worth trying to do so.... Stay with us; try to stay strong; try to support all of us who feel as you do tonight. As you said, tomorrow is another day.