Newbies Nest

[Tess-2]

Newbies Nest

Dear Slay, I don't know how to copy your quote regarding what I explained about my husband. "Sounds a bit like your problem becomes an inconvenience to him..." Yes, my determination to stop drinking IS an inconvenience to him. But if I end up dead or in jail, that's going to be a bit of an inconvenience too, yes? Thank you for your very thoughtful reply. I must stay AF no matter what. I wish I had help, in terms of medication or a miracle or whatever. But I don't, at least not right now. I am on Day 5, which is amazing and brilliant in and of itself. Tomorrow will be Day 6. And I will be so happy and grateful to have made it AF against all odds. Many thanks to you, Slay, and to All on the MWO site.

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

Tess, it would be ideal if we all had ample support at home or at least enough to get over the rough spots in the beginning. Fact is - you don't even really need it! If you have a good plan & a strong commitment you can do this on your own, I did
You are doing great, just keep your eye on the goal!

Nanette, learning how to deal with shitty feelings & emotions is all part of the process. When we stop numbing ourselves we begin to feel our feelings....all of them. Go to the tool box, you'll find a lot of great ideas there. I have found meditation to be a terrific help!

Greetings & good night wishes to everyone!
Let's all have a safe & cozy night in the nest

Lav

[New Day]

Newbies Nest

Just popping into the nest to say I'm back from the movies tonight and didn't come home and drink. End of day 5 for me and looking forward to another AF day tomorrow
Hope everyone has a safe night in the nest. Nite all!

[Tess-2]

Newbies Nest

Hi Lavande - I'm thinking about your input about having a good plan. I'm wondering how I go about making a specific plan. The only "plan" that I have right now is to avoid alcohol -- from one moment to the next. Sounds like there may be a much smarter and effective way to stay sober. Where might I find information about making a plan? Thanks!!

[sweetpea29]

Newbies Nest

Morning to all,

Hi Tess, the tool box is great for info about making a plan.

New Day, congrats on coming home from movies and not drinking, you wont regret that today

Thanks to all of you for the advice and for sharing your stories and struggles, it is such a help to me.

Met my friend for dinner last night but it was later than planned so didnt make the cinema, she fancied a few drinks afterwards so i went with her. Didnt have problems with cravings while out as tbh i preferred to do all my drinking at home, alone in private- how sad. Have to say tho i did want a drink when i eventually got home, thankfully the house is clear of booze.

Starting Day 10 here and dont plan to drink. Plenty of housework to keep me occupied, then driving down to stay with my Dad for the night.

Keep strong everyone

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Good morning Nesters!

I hope everyone is in good form this moring, ready to tackle another AF day

New Day on day 6 AF - good for you!

Tess, when we talk about a plan it's really about a plan to stay sober!!
It takes a month or so to build a new habit, much longer to build an entire new life. Using the tools you find in the https://www.mywayout.org/community/f1...box-27556.html really help a lot

Sweetpea, congrats to you on Day 10 AF :yay:

My main motivation for going AF & SF was the birth of my first grandchild. I didn't want him to grow up seeing me the way I had become. I wanted him to get to know the real me. He's just turned 4 & now calls me his 'best friend'

Stay strong everyone & remember your goals!
Lav

[New Day]

Newbies Nest

Good morning everyone.....yes, it feels good to be waking up AF......even though it takes hours to fall asleep. I still feel better than if I'd been drinking last night. I forget who might have said it originally..(Byrdie maybe).... You'll never regret not drinking in the morning....it's so true!

Lavande.....I've just become a grandmother for the first time and that is also a HUGE motivation for me. He's 9 months old and he and his mom (my daughter) and dad live with us. I get to spend a lot of time with him and even though it won't be forever (maybe another year)...... I hope to maintain the strong bond I have with him and I want to really BE THERE for him.

Byrdie.......all our thoughts are with you and look forward to your return. Lavande, you've been filling her shoes wonderfully in your encouragement of us fledglings in the Nest. :thanks:

Have a great AF Sunday!

[Tess-2]

Newbies Nest

Good morning fellow fledglings,

No hangover on this beautiful Sunday morning. It feels great to be well rather than being foggy in the brain and feeling as if I will throw-up at any moment. Very nice!!

During the times last night that I was unable to sleep I thought a lot about being in The Nest. It feels safe here. Your posts of struggle and victory keep me focused and on track.

This is a housework day for me too. I also plan to take a look at the MWO toolbox to learn more about making a specific plan to stay sober. Will try yoga again this afternoon, though that is quite difficult with my busted-up body from years of AL. Still, I need to start exercise at some time. And this is the time! Tomorrow it is back to school.

I wish for all of you a healthy AF day. I feel strong knowing that I can come here with any "bumps in the road" that I may experience and receive wisdom and support. :thanks:

[decided]

Newbies Nest

Morning all, waking up to my 3ed AF. New here and just sayig hello!

[New Day]

Newbies Nest

Welcome to Decided ....you'll find the Nest a great source of support
Tess2......I'll think of you as I toss and turn trying to get to sleep too.....and think of the Nest as well....don't want to fall out of it!
I'm looking forward to the night when I'll be able to fall asleep naturally and quickly!
Just enjoyed a lovely walk in an area we could let the dog off leash......no one else there and with the fresh snow on the ground it was pretty....and the dog stayed clean of mud. Good to get out and get some fresh air after all my cleaning yesterday
Enjoy the day!

[belles]

Newbies Nest

Lavande;1439034 wrote: Good morning Nesters!

My main motivation for going AF & SF was the birth of my first grandchild. I didn't want him to grow up seeing me the way I had become. I wanted him to get to know the real me. He's just turned 4 & now calls me his 'best friend'

Stay strong everyone & remember your goals!
Lav

Lav, what a wonderful motivation...and what true words, I'm sure your grandson will always value you being his "best friend". Why do any of us want to be something less than our full potential? We have the option to go through life being the best person we can be, or we can continue to sabotage and abuse ourselves into being someone we don't even recognize...why would anyone want to do that to themselves? Thanks for the thought provoking words.

Wishing everyone a wonderful AF day in the Nest!

[lolab]

Newbies Nest

hey guys....only a sec to post - but I saw a question about a plan...

Check this out. https://www.mywayout.org/community/f1...lan-41280.html

[Tess-2]

Newbies Nest

Sobriety Plan

lolab - I did not know what a sobriety plan was, so the link you provided is very helpful. Wow! That IS a plan! I'm going to print it and study it. I expect the MWO book I ordered to arrive in a few days. After reading it, I expect to be able to create a "customized" plan. My plan in the meantime is to stay in The Nest!!

New Day - I'm going to drink a small amount of protein shake before I go to bed tonight. I think my blood sugar is dipping, which causes me to wake up. I think it's worth a try. I will let you know if it helps.

AF Day 6 is much easier, so far, than the first 5. I felt as if I'd shoved myself into a clothes dryer and turned it on: round and round I went. My emotions were everywhere and I felt physically ill. It's very nice to be out of the dryer and on solid ground!! :happyheart:

[RunningCourage]

Newbies Nest

lolab;1439220 wrote: hey guys....only a sec to post - but I saw a question about a plan...

Check this out. https://www.mywayout.org/community/f1...lan-41280.html

Hey all, I bumped the plan up, so should come up under "new posts" just now too. Thanks Lolab - good for newbies and not-so newbies alike that thread

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

From Kuya a few days back:
Hi to all nesters ...... Tomorrow is a chance for a different start to the new year.

Many of us only dreamed of being sober this time last year. Now we have turned a hope and a dream into a reality. Is it hard? ...... Yep! Did anyone say it was easy?.....nope!

When I was a child I was obsessed with horses and riding. The hours I spent walking to the stables to groom and muck out for hours, day after day, just for an hours ride once a week. The aching muscles, the bumps and bruises, the occasional fall...... All for the thrill of being in the saddle ( Patrick .... NO )

When we want something badly enough we must be prepared to go through some pain and exercise some patience to get it. I wanted my life back, it has not been easy, there is still work to do. I did not become a competent horsewoman in four months so I accept that mastering sobriety will also take time.

I didn't learn to ride by watching others, we won't learn to be sober by drinking......so THIS new year stay sober and enjoy the ride.

________________

Hey Nesters. As I was reading back on the posts from the last few days, this one from Kuya wouldn't let go of my thoughts. It's because it is so true. It is not an easy walk thru a field of clover, at times it is HARD. The price seems too high, and it's just easier to give in. I know this...and I gave in many times, until one day I didn't. I got over that rough edge and went on up the hill. This is not an easy journey by anyone's account, but let me tell you ....it is worth it.
If you are under the impression that a drink will make anything better, let me throw some cold water on you. For us, one drink is too many. I would tell myself that I hadn't drank more days than I had....that's a fine thing for an ALK to say, but reality is that ONE drink is too many for us. It is KEY to have a string of AF days and the more the better. They have to be in a row, not scattered out. I think this is an ALK loophole...something to make us feel better, but don't fall for it. Protect your quit as if it were a box of gold. I only wish I could give you a glimpse of the peace I have in my head...it's not full of agitated nonsense. I am able to make good decisions and accept things as they happen. AL is not compatible with reasonable decision-making...as much as I disputed that, I now see it.

Kuya, your words are so true...you don't learn to do this by giving in, you learn to do it by doing it. It hurts sometines, but once you exercise those muscles it gets easier to do. Sure there are bad days, but everyone has them. But you will never have 2 bad days in a row...hang in there til tomorrow and it will be better.

So good to be back home, I can't tell you how much I appreciate all your words of support and love. BUT it makes me even happier to see those of you who are finding success here!! Well done everyone!!! Byrdie