Newbies Nest

[kuya]

Newbies Nest

Sweetpea ....well done. That sober voice gets stronger and more confident every time it says NO and means it.

Soon it won't be 'I can't drink' it will be 'I don't want to drink' and that becomes 'I wouldn't drink now if you paid me'

It doesn't take long, just consistently saying NO

[kuya]

Newbies Nest

Sorry Jenni ...cross post..... So good to hear you so positive. You have fought hard. You deserve to win.

[sweetpea29]

Newbies Nest

Thanks Kuya and to all the wise people here,

Without a doubt reading posts from others esp long-termers is really helping me this time xo

[kuya]

Newbies Nest

sweetpea29;1455433 wrote: Thanks Kuya and to all the wise people here,

Without a doubt reading posts from others esp long-termers is really helping me this time xo

I owe my sobriety to those who came before.....very few can do this alone.

[Pinecone]

Newbies Nest

Good morning, friends,

Yes, Kuya and Sweetpea, agree 100% about the support on here.

Sweetpea, it is exciting to have time off! And you were stronger than the voice on the start of a vacation, so that is a big win for you. When I have time off now, I use the time to re-calibrate my life. Spend extra time cooking or reading, try to excercise everyday, get 9 hours of sleep, watch movies, etc. After getting sober, I had to teach myself how to really relax. When I was drinking, I would just outdo myself for a week in a row and then panic about going back to work. Awful...It can be disheartening to have those thoughts come into your mind, but just don't give them any soil to grow in. Push them right on out, change the subject, get up and go for a walk of take care of any of the H.A.L.T. issues that might be making it stronger. To quote a sage: "NO, HELL NO!!!" Enjoy your week!

Hi Jenni, it is so hard to be negative when you raise your heart rate, isn't it? Excercise is a big part of my quit.

Hi Lola, do you like tea at all? I cut back on coffee a while ago, but I still drink lots of tea. I find that tea has a nice "restorative" property that perks me up without the huge blast of caffeine that coffee usually provides.

K9, I'm sorry your friend is going through that.

Have a great AF day everyone!

[NoSugar]

Newbies Nest

Hello, Nest-Friends

I have a busy weekend but want to take a moment to report that I am on day 10 after going out to eat last night for the first time AF and although not totally enjoying, at least being content with, a non AF beverage with my meal. And -- I fully tasted my delicious veggie and shrimp stir fry. I think I have usually been so focused on the wine, the meal was essentially 'on the side'!

Thanks for helping me get to this point!

I've noticed many people here love dogs as much as I do. One of the screens in my 4-screen office usually is playing this: explore.org/#!/live-cams/player/service-puppy-cam .
This a streaming video of puppies who will be raised to help wounded vets. (You'll have to cut and paste or search on Warrior Canine Connection - when I copy and paste the URL, the wrong hot link appears for some reason). This is the second litter I've watched and just love them!

Sitting back and watching these little guys is so amusing and relaxing --- a good way to distract yourself from any unwanted thoughts or urges.

Have a good weekend, everyone!

[Slaythefear]

Newbies Nest

Morning Nesters! I was in a blissful state for two days until late yesterday afternoon, the gray skies were trying to invade my space. I had nightmares (don't think I want Kuya to interpret them...lol) and woke feeling like I could go either way, so I'm choosing positive. It's day 9 and I'm going to make something good come out of it and forget all the bad things I still have to take care of.

Sweetpea, I liked your post a lot. I could hear me typing that out in many ways. Let's keep hanging tough girl!

Lola b, caffeine I drink in the morning can still have bad sleep results. I just don't do well with coffee. I have cut back to only a couple cups a week, but I have so much on my mind, it's not really helping with the sleep yet, but has in the past. I allowed my self two cups yesterday...wanted a treat. It's better than AL, so I'm not going to get all tough on myself. Giving up everything at once is like hitting a wall going 90 mph.

Lav, be sure to take good care of yourself, too. Two sick people at once is draining. Well wishes for a speedy recovery in your family. I found your story of your marriage interesting. Thanks for sharing.

Everyone have an AF day and evening. It's just one day out of all the other 7 days.

Love,

Slay

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

LOTS of success here in this nest!!!
Sweetpea...it is a GREAT day when AL is just a 'thing'. A NON-issue...and it WILL happen! Nowadays, rewards mean totally different things than they did 2 years ago. Our twisted minds gravitate to Reward=AL. But the REAL you will come to realize that Reward= Peace of Mind for a job well done!!!
NoSugar....you will be pleasantly surprised at how more acute your senses will become once they aren't 'enbalmed' (as Kuya says). Once you quit numbing up your body, you taste more vividly...smell is enhanced (hopefully not yours personally) and I just feel ALIVE! Well done!

I saw a sign yesterday advertising a Super BOWEL Party. :flush: No thanks...

Stay strong everyone! Fast forward to Monday...what a wonderful victory will be had by you!!! Byrdie

[Tess-2]

Newbies Nest

Good Morning All,

Lola - glad to hear that you slept well. Maybe I should cut out coffee too.

Lav - Wow! Your husband packed-up and left when you got sober! That IS a shift in the marriage. I'm very sorry. But you sound "good with it." I've read that sometimes one partner simply grows out of a marriage. Sounds like you "grew" and your husband couldn't or didn't want to keep up with you.

Sweetpea - I hung onto every word of your post as I read it. I could "feel" everything that you were experiencing. "I struggled feeling torn between two battling parts of my mind." Yes, that pretty much sums up the early stages of recovery - at least in my experience. I am so proud of the way you handled it - and won!! Nice work!!

Jenni - So happy to hear from you! You've found a way to break the cycle that leads you to the bottle. Good for you!!

kuya - Thanks for your to-the-point wisdom. Love it!! I'm sort of to the "I wouldn't drink now if you paid me" point. But only sometimes and not for long. I still struggle. Okay, so I'd have to say that I'm not there yet... But I'm on my way!!

Pinecone - You are an important part of the wonderful MWO support. Thank you!! Maybe I will switch from coffee to tea. I don't care much for tea - but perhaps I can learn to like it!

NoSugar - Big congrats on AF Day 10!! Food DOES taste better without alcohol - in my opinion. I used to "fill up" on beer and then basically "pretend" to eat (so as not to be interrogated by Hubby).

Enjoy your day, Everyone. ~ :heartsnflowers:

[Tess-2]

Newbies Nest

Good Morning Slay and Byrdie!! We were cross-posting. Slay, you sound strong and are always able to be articulate about your struggles and successes. I gain so much from your posts. Thank you!! Byrdie, love your response to a Super Bowl Party!! It's nice to laugh!! Bye for now. ~ :hallo:

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Tess...it was a Super BOWEL party...not bowl!!! Somebody needs to fix that sign!!! :H

[Siren136]

Newbies Nest

jenniech;1455427 wrote: goodmorning!!
no hangover = a FANTASTIC start to the weekend!!!

Siren: You sound like me.....too busy at work = a lot of stress. That USED to lead to a bottle of wine which would mean a lousy night sleep so I would not got to gym in morning because hungover and tired which would lead to stress at job which would lead me right back to the bottle. I would get fatter, more irritable and depressed with each day of that endless cycle.

Now, when I get really stressed at work, I take 30 minutes for lunch, NO MATTER WHAT, and I go for a very brisk walk. IT is AMAZING what that does to me. I get back to the office totally refreshed.

Yes, Jennie - I have found that the only way to break the unhealthy cycle is to start doing things differently. I have gotten to the point where I was so depressed that I stay in my pjs for days - not exercising, not even showering. Just drinking. The only way to stop that cycle for me is to force myself to do things differently. Get a shower every day. Get outside into the sunlight and walk my dogs at lunch time. Drink lots of water, etc.

[Siren136]

Newbies Nest

I got an unexpected call last night from some friends who were in the neighborhood, wanting to know if the DH and I wanted to meet them out for dinner. So we met them at a local bar/restaurant (one I have been to successfully since quitting). I know they were beer drinkers, but also that they did not drink frequently. I had a glass of wine with dinner - it's funny because the glass of wine they served me was less than half of the amount I would typically pour myself when I was drinking. I came home and made it through the rest of the night without drinking anything else.

But I want a drink so bad right now. I blame myself for caving last night. I haven't yet come clean with my husband, so he wasn't able to support me and if I can't tell him I certainly am not ready to tell friends. I wasn't prepared for going out with friends, yet. I was invited to a super bowl party and I know that I can't be there yet. My husband is napping now and I'm here on MWO to make it through until he's awake again.

[sweetpea29]

Newbies Nest

Siren136;1455516 wrote: I got an unexpected call last night from some friends who were in the neighborhood, wanting to know if the DH and I wanted to meet them out for dinner. So we met them at a local bar/restaurant (one I have been to successfully since quitting). I know they were beer drinkers, but also that they did not drink frequently. I had a glass of wine with dinner - it's funny because the glass of wine they served me was less than half of the amount I would typically pour myself when I was drinking. I came home and made it through the rest of the night without drinking anything else.

But I want a drink so bad right now. I blame myself for caving last night. I haven't yet come clean with my husband, so he wasn't able to support me and if I can't tell him I certainly am not ready to tell friends. I wasn't prepared for going out with friends, yet. I was invited to a super bowl party and I know that I can't be there yet. My husband is napping now and I'm here on MWO to make it through until he's awake again.

Siren, hang tough girl :l

[RunningCourage]

Newbies Nest

Sometimes a craving appears like a bolt out the blue. Like a strike of lightening. Like a smack in the chops when yer least expecting it. Your day is just tiddlypom and then


BAM!


And there it is, dangling in front of your eyes, your nose, your mouth like the proverbial carrot.

Just happened to me just then.
FLATMATE: Rugby's on.

ME: Oh? 6 Nations?

FLATMATE: Aye.

ME: Who's playing?

FLATMATE: Scotland vs England. I've had a shit day so going to break social convention and be a lassie sitting by myself in a pub to watch the game. You wanna come?

ME: Aye... maybe...

And there it is - the craving has started. All I can think is 1) the cold pint or two while watching the game and 2) that i don't drink... and then i'm feeling confused. *oh no!*

RICK THE DICK: GIVE IN! PPPIIIIIINNNNTTTTSSSSS FOR YYYOOOOOOOOOHHHHUUUUUUUUUU!
ME: But I don't drink. So i can either go to the pub and not drink and watch the game, or just not go and not watch the game.

I choose the latter. I choose the latter because a)I think part of me is really still weak in areas and doesn't want to be needlessly tempted and b) I have just come in from work and really just want to slouch for a while. Also c) I'm no rugby fanatic - I'm not gonna cry, or even miss it, if I don't see the game.

Anyway - posting this here cos it's funny how the ol' craving mind can come along and punch you when you least expect it.

Happy weekend folks.