Newbies Nest

[Hippyman]

Newbies Nest

:colorwelcome:Jimmy, :welcome: I'm so glad you found us. Click the Tool Box link at the bottom of this post and you will find lots of good advise on how to get sober and stay sober!

jIMMYDAMA;1457760 wrote: Good evening nesters. It is indeed a wonderful thing to have all of your support and advice.
My priest (recovering never said recovered) along with my wife insists on AA and 12 steps.

I read the big book it depressed me so much. I just don't think going to meetings to hear how much alcohol destroyed everyone's lives is my answer . I see what it was doing to mine, I have very close friends going down the very same path of ruin and destruction.
It makes me so sad that they can't see that, we aren't drinking from the bottle- The bottle is drinking from us, sucking from us, stealing from us!

I think holding each other accountable is awesome! I need this from everyone here!

Another day AF thank God. I am looking forward to my children counting on their dad again and not the sloppy drunk whose gonna embarrass them again. Looking forward to my wife actually wanting to spend time with me again. Looking forward to going back home and living a normal but AF life. I have been apart from my family for the past 36 days and its killing me. At least I have been almost (I know almost only counts in hand grenades) AF over the last month. A margarita, a few beers and a glass of wine. I can do this with God's help and y'all's support and encouragement. I'm very new but am so glad I found this family!

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Perse and Slay...I know each of you are on Day 13... for me, it was a real gamechanger...I went back and fetched it up for you, it was post #10,341 from Feb 2, 2011. I hope it is a great day for you as well!

Day 13. Yesterday was EASY!!!! I'm so happy to report, that hubs was out of town and I had the perfect opportunity to have myself a high old time....but I didn't! The voices weren't as loud or as often, so day 13 was the day that I think I turned the corner. I feel good! I certainly haven't lost any weight...I am rewarding myself by saying, look, you can have anything in the world you want, except AL...now I need to reel myself in a bit and stop eating everything in sight. Finally finished off the last of the Christmas cookies I had in the freezer. For the first time in years, I feel like I'm getting control of my life, and it feels really good! ODAT! I could NOT have done it without this site.

[NoSugar]

Newbies Nest

Byrdlady;1457954 wrote: Perse and Slay...I know each of you are on Day 13... for me, it was a real gamechanger...I went back and fetched it up for you, it was post #10,341 from Feb 2, 2011. I hope it is a great day for you as well!

.

Hi, Byrd.

I was hoping for a turn for the 'even better' after day 13 but last evening (and much of the night) and continuing this morning, I feel like I've lost the enthusiasm I've had for almost 2 weeks. Probably the adrenalin rush of the challenge has worn off and now this effort at not drinking is starting to be hard, boring and Not Fun. I have essentially no physical cravings, which I appreciate, just mental desires.

I read much of the 100-day thread last evening in an effort to get my mind in the right place. The life all of you 'old-bies' describe is the one I want so I'm trying to find the motivation and energy to continue. Luckily I am here and know I am motivated by many of the posts. A big part of today's plan is to drive straight home after a volunteer activity I do each Wednesday afternoon and not stop by a very conveniently located store for a bottle of wine. (It was doing exactly that 2 weeks ago that made me say: DONE and start this quest on the next day, 1/24).

Anyway, I don't want to derail myself and I know what the problem is so.... onward!

I hope others in the nest are feeling good.

[gingersnap]

Newbies Nest

I appreciate everyon's thoughts on AA. I went to my counseling session last night and felt a huge relief when I left. As I indicated the couselor the wk before seemed to push AA at me....if I didn't go I couldn't suceed. We discussed this...her intent was not to push it at me.....what she explained to me was, for some people with no support system (and I don't) having that face to face interaction can give some people comfort, knowing someone is there. We discussed something very interesting about triggers that can push me.. HALT....Hungry, Alone, Lonely, Tired.....my life. I have many issues in my life to sort thru...I would rather sort thur the laundry. I am a very co-dependant depressed person, although co-workers and friends would not know this...so alcohol is a friend to me. I can escape and not have to face the laundry of my life. At night me and my friend.

At some point I may feel AA is a place to go. Right now, I am going to come here, read and share. Everyone here is so "real". I also think it is easier to be honest about oneself in a setting like this. Even tho we are not face to face, we have a bond...alcohol and all it's dirty dark secrets. We can share this with each other, openly and honestly. I have found writing sets me free. :thanks: Ginger

[lolab]

Newbies Nest

nosugar....I have been working out for a few months. hard. I'm not telling you this in an attempt to make you feel bad in case you are not. I'm telling you this because last week, I lifted my shirt during a workout to expose my midsection - like the girls in the video show....and I did NOT see a perfectly sculpted core. I saw JIGGLE. JIGGLY FAT. God, I was so pissed. I have been busting my arse for MONTHS and I swear I jiggle more now than I did when I started! So, in true ME fashion - I googled. And what I found was that this is actually a GOOD sign. (HUH???)

Apparently, when you have been working hard and buildilng up your core muscles and burning off fat - something goes on (forgive my lack of a scientific explanation) where as your muscles firm up, the subcutaneous fat can become more "jiggly" and more visible for a short period of time but it's a sign that you're headed in the right direction.

Now, if you're still with me - I do believe that in our quest to become comfortably AF - we encounter these same kinds of seeming setbacks. Feeling that we have to get our minds back in the right place...feeling bored...like "is this all there is"....it doesn't happen to everybody at exactly the same time along the way - but it sure does happen to everybody (that I have witnessed here). This is a sign that you're on the right path - it's a path we've all traveled and we can tell you that it's the right one - even if it feels wrong. Don't fight it too much - just keep in mind that it's to be expected - and there will be more of them to come.

It's all a series of fits and starts...and for each one that you ride out and make it around the corner - you'll find yourself on a new level of understanding who you really are without alcohol. You can definitely feel stagnant for short periods of time - sometimes even feel like you're sliding backwards....depressed, miserable, and bored....but push on through. Better times ARE ahead - I promise!

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

NoSugar...nobody can explain these 'spells' like Lolab....In my own cryptic way...

I remember when I was a kid, I'd lay in my bed at night and thru the darkness, holler in to my parents that my bones ached. They would holler back, 'It's just growing pains!' I accepted this and soon drifted off to sleep. If you plotted your recovery on a graph, I bet you'd notice that on a scale of 1-10, you are feeling MUCH better now than on any day you were drinking! Progress isn't always easy to spot, but it is forward motion in the RIGHT direction. If you are having a bad day today, I bet tomorrow will be a good day! I never had/have 2 days in a row! (this is a meciful phenomenon) Most of all, BE PATIENT! We didn't get in this hole overnight, and it takes more than a couple weeks to get out of it....BUT you are moving in the right direction! Stick close! It's a battle in your mind now, the physical stuff is over!! You got this!!

Ginger, this place really worked for me and it has for 100's/1000's of others! We can be MUCH more intimate here than we can in a face to face...being annonymous helps tremendously here. We can say what we REALLY feel without fear of 'one of those looks'. Settle in...it's a VERY good place! We are so glad you're here. XO, Byrdie

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Cross post, Lola!!! Same idea...I like yours better!

[Slaythefear]

Newbies Nest

Morning Nesters! It's day 13 and I find myself sore, feeling fatigued and a bit low today. No worries as I have no intention on calling up AL. I've had four very good days and maybe my body is drained of all those feel good hormones and neurotransmitters for the moment. I'll try not to be too concerned or focused on feeling low today.

Brydie, yes I remember day 14 being my great moment on my first AF round started in August. It was like a breath of fresh air after being held hostage in a stinky sock. LOL!! Yes, maybe that's not great morning imaginary. :H Hey, but it made me laugh in my low and that's worth something.

Lav, great words of wisdom as this has been my experience, too. You've been sending quite a few pearls out lately.

All I can tell you is that I had to stop wanting my husband to act like he cared about what was going on. He is a person with next to no compassion & you can't bleed a rock, right? Focus on YOU & what you need to do to break this addiction. You can figure out the rest later
Tess, love what you wrote.

Love life while life is to be loved. Keep it simple. Keep it pure.

It's so true and where I am in my journey right now. I'm entering a new decade and I am shedding the bs and chaos, etc. and working toward peace, purity and simplicity. Right on, girl!!!!

Welcome Jimmy. If you really want to be free from your AL's bondage, this is a great place to find support and helpful material. Almost Free and others have responded well, so for now, I'll just welcome you into the nest. :l I will say reading everyone's posts about AA reminds me of religion. You get calm rational healthy members and then there are the radicals. People come in different sizes and shapes with different problems and agendas.

Perse, good job on day 12!!! Those first 30 or so days can be all over the map, so hang tough!

Jenn, I hope whether you opt for the 'work flu' or you go, strength be with you to handle the war against AL and the obstacles you face.

Kuya, good morning friend. Yep, it's all about taking personal responsibility and letting others take their own. I am shedding the weight of the world and working to carry mine.

Good morning Happy Hipster. Keep adding to my quotes. I love them.

Lola b, you always have wisdom. One only need to go back through your posts!

No sugar, my start gal. I am a bit low today after four GREAT days, but no desire for AL, just low and feeling fatigued, so I agree with what you said.
Probably the adrenalin rush of the challenge has worn off

I've been going like gang busters for four days, so the above statement stands up to the test of reason. Don't get discouraged. This is my third time, so it is different this time for me in the way my body is going through the days without AL. Life for everyone has its up and down days, so the only difference here is we handle it without AL. I think when we overdo, we get tired and low just like anyone does. Hand shake we aren't drinking through the highs or lows.:goodjob:

To anyone I may have missed (tired), welcome and join in. We can all do this.

Love,

Slay

[Hippyman]

Newbies Nest

Tess-2;1457634 wrote: So... I'm wondering what it really means to be voted "Most likely to Succeed"? Everyone hates the Homecoming Queen, yes? I am very sad to report that I was given that "honor," and then I cried because I didn't want to have to wear a silly crown. Really?? If the Student Body (consisting of 14 to 17-year-old students) could have seen my future, they would have voted me, "Most likely to fall flat on her face," and they would have been spot-on.

But you know what?, being a total and hopeless failure led me to the MWO website and to Newbies Nest. Can't think of anyplace I'd rather be.

I love my 30-Days-AF-Hat!! :goodtime: I'm going to donate my Homecoming Queen crown to Goodwill. I really never wanted it...

Great idea on donating what you no longer need to Charity but I would think twice about giving away something that was given to you as a way of honoring your accomplisments. I hope you'll keep it and someday you will look back at that time in your life thru different eyes. I see life as a school and challenges along the way as lessons to be learned. Have you read the books "Coragous Souls" or http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SvbkccZArFw[/video]]Robert Schwartz Your Souls Plan - You Are a Holy, Eternal, Courageous Soul - YouTube I'm thinking that we alkies must have signed up for some pretty tuff courses of study? Addiction sure isn't for sillies.

[Kradle123]

Newbies Nest

NoSugar;1457961 wrote: Hi, Byrd.

I was hoping for a turn for the 'even better' after day 13 but last evening (and much of the night) and continuing this morning, I feel like I've lost the enthusiasm I've had for almost 2 weeks. Probably the adrenalin rush of the challenge has worn off and now this effort at not drinking is starting to be hard, boring and Not Fun. I have essentially no physical cravings, which I appreciate, just mental desires.

I read much of the 100-day thread last evening in an effort to get my mind in the right place. The life all of you 'old-bies' describe is the one I want so I'm trying to find the motivation and energy to continue. Luckily I am here and know I am motivated by many of the posts. A big part of today's plan is to drive straight home after a volunteer activity I do each Wednesday afternoon and not stop by a very conveniently located store for a bottle of wine. (It was doing exactly that 2 weeks ago that made me say: DONE and start this quest on the next day, 1/24).

Anyway, I don't want to derail myself and I know what the problem is so.... onward!

I hope others in the nest are feeling good.
Byrdlady;1457972 wrote: Cross post, Lola!!! Same idea...I like yours better!

Morning Byrdie,

2 questions:

1. Can I cut and paste your two links to the tool box and the newbie nest in my signature?

2. How do I cut and paste the two links in my signature ?

Nels told me how to do it once but I am always on my iPad and it won't...I hate seeing people here needing direction and I can not just pop over and point them to the links...

:l:h

[NoSugar]

Newbies Nest

Byrdlady;1457972 wrote: Cross post, Lola!!! Same idea...I like yours better!

I liked and needed both of them! Thank you Byrd and Lola for responding so quickly and so well. I think the act of sharing the burden (and having such kind people ready to help with the load) really helps.

I am a very goal-oriented person and want to make steady, continuous progress-- the patience that you counsel IS what I need.

Lola, your jiggle description cracked me up! - thanks.

[Fin]

Newbies Nest

Day 1 (please universe, give me strength today)

[NoSugar]

Newbies Nest

Thanks, Slay

I look forward each day to reading your posts -- you are really good at keying in on what each person has offered and needs.

I know we'll still be AF tomorrow - it would be crazy to undo our 2 weeks of work!

[NoSugar]

Newbies Nest

Fin;1458005 wrote: Day 1 (please universe, give me strength today)

There is alot of support for your weak spots here! Stay in touch and good luck, Fin!

[Hippyman]

Newbies Nest

Kradle123;1457993 wrote: Morning Byrdie,

2 questions:

1. Can I cut and paste your two links to the tool box and the newbie nest in my signature?

2. How do I cut and paste the two links in my signature ?

Nels told me how to do it once but I am always on my iPad and it won't...I hate seeing people here needing direction and I can not just pop over and point them to the links...

:l:h

You can just "control/copy" the links from the bottom of my post and re-post it under your signature. Easy peasy...right? :H