Last Straw...I make observations of the milestones myself. When I came in, long termers would fly in, say how great being sober was, but negelcted to tell me how the hell to do it! Here is what I found and continue to observe...
Day 1 is THE HARDEST. Day 3, all the AL is out of your blood (if you were to test it) and you are operating under your own power. MOST of the withdrawal symptoms pass by D3. (but I had almost flu like symptoms the first couple weeks...tired, achy, bleh)
Day 4 and 5 are a slippery slope. Why? Because this is where we tell ourselves that we are feeling FANTASTIC! What was all the FUSS about??? If I can stop for 4/5 days, I MUST NOT HAVE A PROBLEM AFTER ALL!! I think I'll reward myself! I can stop at one...two tops! This is the undoing of many a nester. Keep going....push thru these thoughts....like Patrick says, it is The Voice trying to get back in.
As you can see from our own Mein, 7 days is a huge milestone, and that's why Star acknowledges it with her MOONS. At D7, we have been able to handle ALL the days of the week...so we can't say, 'well, it's FRIDAY' or whatever...we have now been thru each day and we know that we can do it. This is a huge step.
Day 13 was a big one for me...I had gotten 12 days twice before and fell...this last time I pushed thru and I'm so glad I did. This was the day that it all seemed possible...that I really could live a life without AL!! This was a gamechanging day for me.
From D13 on until D30 are emotional. Pity-paryties are thrown. Now you are creating a habit...you will be conquering the world one minute and reduced to a pile of tears the next. Weak/Strong....This is NORMAL, and everyone does this. We are clearing out years of abuse, after all...
After Day 30...there is a flat spot. "Is this all there is?" Like a bride coming home from her honeymoon...All the high emotions and feelings of accompishment....your HAT from the nest....but then, NOW WHAT? From here until about 45-60 days will be a little flat, and this is when Lolab comes in and discusses 'phases' in sobriety. (and there are many). But when you know about these landmines you can watch out for them. By this time, you have a significant amount of AF time and a big investment in your quit. This is when maintenance comes into play...I think it's an important time to STAY in the nest to help others...by seeing where you came from, it's easier to stay on the right path (if you ask me).
Day 100 is when I feel like I really arrived. "I don't drink" is easy to say and I mean it. Not one, not ever. It tried to kill me, and I resent that (call me crazy).
Each phase is important...it's just like growing up. You will do a lot of that in this timespan. Instead of glazing over problems you will face them and march right thru them instead of shoving them aside. Is this always pretty? No, it isn't...sometimes it's dam hard...but when you get thru them, there is a tremendous amount of pride and satisfaction from a fear that you faced and came out the other side. It is a sense of PEACE like no other I can describe. The agitation and conflict in my head are gone, it's just a simpler place up there now. The days pass faster than you will imagine...stay the course...this peace in my head is worth the price of admission! Please don't be overwhelmed at this timeline of mine...because at EACH stage, you feel better, not worse...whenever I have a bad patch I remember the words at the bottom of every message I send, all you gotta do, is get thru this day. Byrdie
Comment