Newbies Nest

[Fin]

Newbies Nest

s1179;1460943 wrote: --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I am new on here....Finally I have admitted to myself that I do need some kind of help!!!

I am married with a nearly 2 year old...and even just being open and admitting that I have somekind of problem is weird but promising for me.

I don't drink every day...but if I do it's usually wine....I will drink in the day and then try to pretend to myself and my husband that I haven't been drinkung....He really hates it and this is now causing a serious problem in my marriage.....I don't want it to end so this is why I am here....

I am understanding that I am the kind of person that can't just have a few drinks...It's either none or quite a lot!!!!! But I'm not that sure of how to go about it or how I will feel in situations where other people are drinking and I won't be able to!!! HELP....

ANy advise would be greatly appreciated...I need to keep my family together...

Thanx for listening S xxx

Welcome!!

[Pinecone]

Newbies Nest

Hi Friends,

I've missed you all over the weekend as I was very busy at work.

S1179, Welcome and you are in the right place! Have you found the Toolbox? https://www.mywayout.org/community/f1...box-27556.html
You might want to read back in this thread or any other for that matter.

Mein, big congratulations on your seven days! You already sound like a new person. I am truly happy for you!

NoSugar, thanks for posting that, it really puts it well. It matches my experience with that concept as well.

Have a great AF evening!

[Oneredshoe]

Newbies Nest

Good Monday All. We certainly have a busy nest! LOVE IT! I am running late to get ready for work so I don't have a ton of time to write. Just wanted to check in....today is my 8th consecutive AF day. Welcome to the new nesters. I hope all of you have a wonderful day!

[kuya]

Newbies Nest

Oneredshoe;1461027 wrote: Good Monday All. We certainly have a busy nest! LOVE IT! I am running late to get ready for work so I don't have a ton of time to write. Just wanted to check in....today is my 8th consecutive AF day. Welcome to the new nesters. I hope all of you have a wonderful day!

Well look at you One! Loving yer work!

[New Day]

Newbies Nest

the following quote is from NoSugar "In the Roll Call we count AF days. I like posting there and seeing my number and those of our friends going up and up. However, we also could be counting days sober. Having a single glass of wine or e.g. New Day's single, planned toast to her daughter's birthday last weekend (Hi, New Day!) might end the "AF streak" but it likely would not end a sobriety streak if it stopped there and did not lead to repeated drinking episodes. "

First, Hi to you too NoSugar ..... and to all the familiar Nesters and welcome to all the Newest Nesters as well.
Yes, I had my string of 40 days AF (my goal was for 30) and I contemplated not toasting just to keep my Roll Call number going up. But that was not what I came to MWO .... for a number. I came to get out of the daily habit of drinking that I had been doing for far too many years. If I can break that habit, I will feel successful.
I did have the 1/2 glass of champagne, topped up with OJ and participated in the toast. I refilled with OJ after that. So, my AF count starts again, but my days of sobriety are still adding up. So even though I am "officially" Day 2, my count is 41/42......and I am very happy with that. If I find it too discouraging to post on Roll Call, I will stop, but if it's okay, I'd still like to pop into the Nest.

Tess ..... Best of luck with your exam ..... I have a feeling you are acing all of your exams!

Byrdie .... I loved your post today of the different "stages" of being AF ..... perhaps I was feeling a little "flat" after reaching the 30 day goal ..... I know at the time I was undecided, and hence didn't drink just to give myself a little more time to consider what I really wanted. I

S1179 ... Welcome. The key for me being able to go beyond a 7 day stretch of AF, was a more positive mindset .... I decided that I was "choosing" not to drink, whereas other attempts were made with a more punitive " I CAN'T have a drink" It made all the difference to me, if that makes any sense to you.

Hippyman .... you were the real winner of the doggie kisses contest to all of us .... the girl who employed the candyface was not playing fairly! But oh well..... she's just a kid! I just hope it wasn't her parents encouraging the cheating, or they are setting a bad example.

Catch up with you all later!

[Hippyman]

Newbies Nest

Quote from New Day...Hippyman .... you were the real winner of the doggie kisses contest to all of us .... the girl who employed the candyface was not playing fairly! But oh well..... she's just a kid! I just hope it wasn't her parents encouraging the cheating, or they are setting a bad example.



Thanks so much. I felt like it was unfair but I was glad to see her being so proud of her puppy. She got a huge gift bag of doggie stuff and got her picture on the front page and I was happy for her.

Between you and me I still think Zelda is the "Kissing Queen" and she doesn't need to be baited to do her kissing! :h:wd:awprint::crowned:

[Icanwithoutacan]

Newbies Nest

I get that s1179! Hippyman 😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘you are the winner to us!

[Tess-2]

Newbies Nest

Icanwithoutacan;1461076 wrote: I get that s1179! Hippyman 😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘you are the winner to us!

Ican - You are a winner to All in Newbies Nest, too!! My fledgling friend, would you ever, in your most generous heart, consider changing your avatar? When I see it, I feel very uncomfortable. Yes, I own my "personal problem," and I am nearly certain that no other Nester is having the same reaction. I want to get to know you, get an intuitive sense of who you are, but I can't seem to navigate my emotions beyond your avatar. For me, it's -- well -- kind of creepy.

Or maybe you don't need to change your avatar. Maybe you can explain the meaning, for you, of your choice. And maybe that will help me to see things the way that you see things.

If you like, I am willing to change my avatar. I am all for peace, love, and goodwill.

Please let me know your HONEST thoughts.

Blessings and Good Cheer. ~

[Tess-2]

Newbies Nest

jIMMYDAMA;1460904 wrote: Good Monday morning to all!...

...Tess: Speaking of empties, I found two "unopened" aluminum bottles of colors light under the seat of my truck the other day, I can't imagine how they got away, Haha. I used to throw them out of the window
(Yes littering) My kids would say "Daddy that's littering" and I didn't have the heart or guts to say " Daddy would get a much worse ticket or go to jail if a police officer would stop me with these bottles in the truck"!
What a great example I was setting Drinking and driving and littering. So terrible, Thank God that's over!

I'm so fortunate that I landed here when I did. Thanks to all of you!...

jIMMY - I admire the way that you attempt to include everyone in The Nest in your posts. It is very meaningful and helpful to ALL as we journey together. Thank you!! jIMMY, I did many things, too, while I was drinking that I regret. Many things. Most of them I don't remember... (And I wish that comment was funny but, no, it is very sad.)

So, jIMMY, we can't go back, right? What is done is done. For me, what I'm doing now that I'm sober is contributing to my community. I volunteer at a food kitchen, for example. Did I litter? Hell, I don't know. Maybe I did. I don't remember. But I plan to volunteer this summer to pick up trash tossed around at a local park.

You have a full-time job and kids and a lot of responsibilities in your life. So I am not suggesting that what is "right" for me is going to be a good thing for you.

Just know, jIMMY, that getting and staying sober is the absolute best thing that you can do for yourself, your family, your community, and the world. I forgive you. You forgive me. We move on.

:goodjob:

[NoSugar]

Newbies Nest

New Day;1461050 wrote: t
Yes, I had my string of 40 days AF (my goal was for 30) and I contemplated not toasting just to keep my Roll Call number going up. But that was not what I came to MWO .... for a number. I came to get out of the daily habit of drinking that I had been doing for far too many years. If I can break that habit, I will feel successful.
I did have the 1/2 glass of champagne, topped up with OJ and participated in the toast. I refilled with OJ after that. So, my AF count starts again, but my days of sobriety are still adding up. So even though I am "officially" Day 2, my count is 41/42......and I am very happy with that. If I find it too discouraging to post on Roll Call, I will stop, but if it's okay, I'd still like to pop into the Nest.

You are a great asset to the nest, New Day, and I am always happy to see posts from you.
Plus, you are on d 42 in meeting your goal, which is the most important thing. Congratulations on how well you've done.

[Patrick]

Newbies Nest

hi Tess that is Winston Churchill, Britains war time(ww2) prime minister giving the v for victory sign

[thelaststraw]

Newbies Nest

Byrdlady. Thanks so much for answering my question. The answer is amazing. I am glad it answered others' questions, too.
I have the page written down so I can return to it.
Everyone else, It is so encouraging to read snippets of experiences. I see myself inmost of them, not realizing others have done the same things.

It also keeps my eyes open for people out there who might be going through the same stuff. Being away from AL lets me see more clearly than, well, since 1971.

I was at the gym yesterday and went near a young man working out on the dumbells. There was such a strong odor of AL eminating from him, I knew what was what.

GTG, Lovies.

[Slaythefear]

Newbies Nest

Evening Nesters!

I'm on Day 18 and find that I am getting more serious in nature as I track through this third journey AF. Is this happening to anyone else? I remember the scene in 'When A Man Loves a Woman', Meg Ryan states she is afraid she won't be fun anymore. I don't think I'm really concerned with that this time around, but I find I want to be more serious and more by myself. Maybe that's part of that introspective phase mentioned a few days ago. I thought my reclusive appetite had more to do with staying clear of AL exposure or triggers, but now I'm wondering if there is change taking place as to who I truly am at this point in my life...more serious. I've been soul searching a lot this time through the journey out of the fog.

Just looking for any thoughts or experiences others are having.

Slay

[jenniech]

Newbies Nest

Thanks no sugar!! I loved your copy post about moderation and how exhausting it is!! I couldn't agree more!! I have always been totally honest on MWO, it is just in those AA meetings where i feel like I am being judged to a certain extent. Everyone assures me that is not happening but isn't it human nature? I just don't like facing the judgment face to face. On MWO, some may judge but I have no idea. I like that!!

Feeling so tired lately. Instead of fantasizing about drinking, I seem to be fantasizing about sleep these days. I consider that a very good thing but I also look forward to getting some energy back. I just chalk it up to my body readjusting and learning how to NOT be drunk or hungover all the time.

S1179 :welcome:

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Slay, yes Ma'am...the serious phase is you getting to know you. The fun-loving Slay that everyone knows and loves is under there...this introspection gives us a sense that we are going to be a bore and a boat anchor....it is temporary! I think maybe it's a lack of confidence (dutch couraage, as they say)...once you get thru it, you will really LIKE who you are. Confidence shines thru, and I guess the lack of it does too....it will come back...but this time, for REAL..(not the fake AL stuff)

I've been at parties and been asked 'how much wine have YOU had tonight?' None actually....I just found myself! Try to be patient with yourself as you get BACK to your new normal!! You are doing GREAT! B