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Newbies Nest
s1179, hope you're feeling better now - coming out the other side is such a relief - keep your eye on the goal!
On day 4 and feel nothing but relief. I am grateful for today.IT'S NEVER TOO LATE TO BE WHAT YOU MIGHT HAVE BEEN
Relapse starts long before the drink is drunk!!.Fresh Start!
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Well, I should be day 12, but instead I'm back at one. Last night I found a bottle of port that I had forgotten about. So I opened it and took a drink. Then another. Then realized what I was doing and poured the rest out. Tears, shame, guilt, worthlessness... That is how I'm feeling today. How could I have destroyed 11 days of hard work for a momentary buzz? Sometimes you just hate the thing you learn about yourself. So I'm back at day 1. I'm not giving up. Just so disappointed that I let myself down. I'm so sad today. Took my dog for a walk and just cried the entire time I was in the woods. Guess my addiction is worse than even I thought. I hate it, I hate it so much! Why can't I just be normal??? I'm off to the gym to sweat some of these feelings away. So day 1 and counting...
:upset:Would you like you, if you met you?
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Newbies Nest
Hi Mein,
Have a cry and a scream then get back up. I notice you are an expat. I am as well and I think not being in our own countries, at times, can be so difficult especially when we are trying to give up booze.
Take care and 'see' you soon
Patrice
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Newbies Nest
patrice;1463743 wrote: Hi Mein,
Have a cry and a scream then get back up. I notice you are an expat. I am as well and I think not being in our own countries, at times, can be so difficult especially when we are trying to give up booze.
Take care and 'see' you soon
Patrice
I think that you are right Patrice......It's not an excuse for how we act but I think that living so far away....feeling lonely can sometimes add to the problems that we have...
Lets try to be positive:l
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Newbies Nest
kuya;1463738 wrote: $..... When you want to cry.....cry, the situation we are in is very sad, it warrants tears.
Cry,drink loads of water and your headache will go and you may even get some sleep.
Never hold back tears. :l:l
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Newbies Nest
I am SO RELIEVED
I did not drink last night!!! Night One of Three done!!!
Husband realized he was causing me extraordinary angst/anxiety and he needed to work late so he agreed that I should just drive up with the kids and he would follow later. That way, pressure off him to leave work before finishing some "emergency" and I was able to get going and arrive here earlier. Arrived at 10pm....lots of stressful traffic. I have no idea when my husband arrived...probably around 2 or 3am. I know,expensive and wasteful to take two cars but it saved me....I would have been in such a bad place if I had waited for him.
So 10pm I get here and have to make the beds and settle in. I say hello to everyone and clearly, my friend announced to everyone before i arrived that I was not drinking. Why do I say that? The women were not drinking wine but herbal tea. That is a first. Anyway, I could be annoyed with that - the fact that she was talking about me behind my back - but really, I don't care. My sobriety comes first and if they think I am an out of control lush then so be it.
As soon as I sat down to my tea my friend asks "so how long have you not been drinking?" I REALLY did NOT want to have that conversation with her....Maybe later but to have that be the first thing she asked me was annoying. Somehow I deflected the question.....
PHEW... I feel so good. I have been coming here to ski for many, many years and this is the FIRST morning I have EVER woken up without a hangover here!!!
Thanks to you all for your support. It means SO SO much to me and helps SO MUCH
:l:thanks::hI just won't anymore
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