Newbies Nest
Thank you for this post Slay. This speaks to me. I can sometimes physically take on there pain. I have tried to stop that in the last few months. These things that we take on from other people's lives are really out of our control. The outcomes are 100% based on their decisions and choices in life. Lack of control is one reason for frustration and frustration is one reason to drink. Take away frustration and lack of control and we take away some anger, disappointment, anxiety, the need to scream (if the frustration gets bad enough) and feelings of inability. These feelings are all very powerful feelings that are brought on by frustration caused by lack of control of things..
If you do not have control over any part of your life (like me) you may have drank to have control over something. So we thought. It turns out we do not have control over that either. Then we drank to numb the feelings of inadequacy. Arghhhhhhh.
I am actually learning to take control of some of my life. It feels good.
I read this in a book (Until Today! by: Iyanla Vanzant) years ago and it helped me at the time:
(If God is not your life choice fill in with your belief, Creator, Universe etc)
"Today I am loving and supporting others without interfering in their lives!
........................When you decide what is right for someone, what is best for them, or how they should go about doing what you feel is right and best in their life, you are getting between that person and what God has in store for that person............"
Well I did not see that post coming. All I wanted to do was say Thank you to Slay for the great post.
Slaythefear;1466092 wrote: Morning Nesters!
I haven't read the nest today nor much yesterday, so I can't comment on anything presently. I'll try to get to that later today or tonight, but I hope everyone is staying strong.
When I lie down in bed at night, I often try to read something before I doze off. Last night I made it through two pages of a book before I fell asleep. I thought I'd include the first paragraph and it's certainly something I'm presently working hard on in my life.
"If I make one point in this book, I hope it is that the surest way to make ourselves crazy is to get involved in other people's business, and the quickest way to become sane and happy is to tend to our own affairs."
I CAN ATTEST TO THE ACCURACY OF THAT STATEMENT! I can imagine there are others here who have struggled with AL because they have carried burdens and responsibilities of others while ignoring caring for their own needs. It's is similar to the serenity prayer.
"God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference. "
We can change ourselves and take responsibility and control for our own lives and decisions while letting others carry the responsibility and control over their own lives and decisions and all resulting consequences. We make ourselves crazy when we try to control outcomes and responsibilities that aren't ours to control.
Be strong and take control over your addiction or alcohol abuse. It's something that is your responsibility and something that is within your control.
Love,
Slay (Day 27...kick it to the curb.)
I haven't read the nest today nor much yesterday, so I can't comment on anything presently. I'll try to get to that later today or tonight, but I hope everyone is staying strong.
When I lie down in bed at night, I often try to read something before I doze off. Last night I made it through two pages of a book before I fell asleep. I thought I'd include the first paragraph and it's certainly something I'm presently working hard on in my life.
"If I make one point in this book, I hope it is that the surest way to make ourselves crazy is to get involved in other people's business, and the quickest way to become sane and happy is to tend to our own affairs."
I CAN ATTEST TO THE ACCURACY OF THAT STATEMENT! I can imagine there are others here who have struggled with AL because they have carried burdens and responsibilities of others while ignoring caring for their own needs. It's is similar to the serenity prayer.
"God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference. "
We can change ourselves and take responsibility and control for our own lives and decisions while letting others carry the responsibility and control over their own lives and decisions and all resulting consequences. We make ourselves crazy when we try to control outcomes and responsibilities that aren't ours to control.
Be strong and take control over your addiction or alcohol abuse. It's something that is your responsibility and something that is within your control.
Love,
Slay (Day 27...kick it to the curb.)
If you do not have control over any part of your life (like me) you may have drank to have control over something. So we thought. It turns out we do not have control over that either. Then we drank to numb the feelings of inadequacy. Arghhhhhhh.
I am actually learning to take control of some of my life. It feels good.
I read this in a book (Until Today! by: Iyanla Vanzant) years ago and it helped me at the time:
(If God is not your life choice fill in with your belief, Creator, Universe etc)
"Today I am loving and supporting others without interfering in their lives!
........................When you decide what is right for someone, what is best for them, or how they should go about doing what you feel is right and best in their life, you are getting between that person and what God has in store for that person............"
Well I did not see that post coming. All I wanted to do was say Thank you to Slay for the great post.
I even avoided checking in here - probably out of shame, a sense of failure, reluctance to acknowledge that failure etc. It's all too easy to slip into that 'Oh what the hell, I may as well, who cares anyway?' state of mind. So I've been back here now, reading and appreciating all your encouraging and empathic words, trying to summon up some will power and courage to NOT drink any wine this evening.
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