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    Newbies Nest

    Good morning Friends, just have a second end of the month reports, it looks like everyone is becoming a little more self aware, and are getting somewhat at the root of the cravings and urges.
    I know from all the posts I have read in the last month, that we are really all in the same boat and have experienced very similar urges.
    It sure helps me understand myself a little better to read what y'all are going through.

    Nothing is to crazy or too wild, if you are feeling it, thinking it, going through it, there is an above average chance so are we. We can all help each other by what the group is experiencing as a collective, the beauty is, we are just on different mile markers on the same journey!
    Thanks Neseter I appreciate your time, concern and encouragement! j

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      Newbies Nest

      Good Morning Everyone :l

      Just a quick post to say "hi" and mention how proud I am of all of those who overcame struggles last night. You are all doing great!

      Just a note to Daisy- yes, HALT has saved me over and over again. Just look at me, girl- I am not bragging here, but if I can do 150 days (and no going back), by paying attention to HALT (and a few other triggers)- then you and everyone else can do it! Keep up the great work!

      Gang, I am so sorry for the limited time I have been spending here, but my work load has suddenly increased tremendously. I am trying to keep up with post reading, but have very limited amount of time to reply. Just know that I am with you all the way.

      You guys ROCK!!
      :heartbeat:

      Star:star:

      08-13-15

      I am only one drink away from never being sober again.

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        Newbies Nest

        Slaythefear;1470645 wrote: Morning Nesters! Well wishes to all for a strong AF day. None of us will get through life without trials and tribulations. Sometimes it is of our own making and sometimes it isn't, but in the end we are still left with the responsibility of finding our way through these times of difficulties and emerging triumphant and wiser from the experience. Life is certainly a journey of discovery. AL will keep you locked in a dark place and away from making the correct decisions during those storms and experiencing the happiness and victory after they pass. This enemy will leave you to the hands of guilt and shame for not properly handling matters from a positions of strength, courage and honor. It's worth freeing yourself from this bondage. Make today 'a clean slate'. Tell yourself you are going to take this gift of life and honor it with all it's ups and downs. Tomorrow today will be gone and you can't get it back. So don't waste it. It's not a renewable resource.


        ljeaner's quote to runningbird:




        Runningbird's response:



        ljeannie I was going to reply with a similar explanation and how the scene shows such a dark side of life, the sadness itself can be a trigger.

        Runningbird, a thought about escaping into oblivion. Maybe it isn't the oblivion you seek but escaping the fear of worrying what others are thinking...escaping your own insecurities about yourself. In some way you admired that quality she had at that moment because it's what you want to feel and AL is something you've used to get that feeling. Fear is such a powerful destructive force in our lives. We often don't recognize just how much damage this sometimes quiet force is having on our behaviors. A big part of AL recovery is learning to like, love and accept ourselves. There is a lot of mental work to be done outside of the addiction. Why did we ever start in the first place? We can find the answers within ourselves in time and journaling and discussing just like you have can open up our understanding of our own behaviors. Kudos to you. You are thinking and working to discover your demons and your needs.


        Find your strength wherever you can. This nest has been so warm and supportive lately. Grab a hand and do this for yourself!!

        Love,

        Slay

        P.S. - Thanks oneredshoe. Maybe I can soak up some of that dancing elephants energy today. She is alive and loving life.
        I like this. Needed it this morning.
        I will be sober so I can be clear and remember being a mommy and so I can be in the best place God wants to place me. I will be here! now! FREE! 12.5mg Topamax AM&PM, Ativan until safe from withdrawal syndrome & for anxiety. Thank God I Am Done!

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          Newbies Nest

          Thx for kind thoughts RB and Mein .... Jimmy I'm so damn proud of u ... Ur almost to your hat!!!!!!!!

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            Newbies Nest

            Mornin Nesters! That drunk lady on the bus IS all of us!! What a metaphor...it is up to us where we want to get off of that bus!!! At the end of the line, or well before that. Glad I got off the dam thing when I did (but I sure could have saved myself and others a lot of heartache if I'd gotten off sooner....UGG) The 'gift' of hindsight I guess is the gift we pass to others who come after us.

            That's the thing about being under the cloud of addition....you think there is pressure there to drink...but that's Dick Head (Addiction Head) talking. It's pressure all right, but only after you get out from under it can you understand its pull and its power...I think. It's hard to explain, but when you're in it, you can't see it for what it is. I'd say that generally EVERYTHING gets clearer when you get AL out. I guess that's why it's called REALITY. Go figure.

            Lots of success going on here! I can't tell you how proud I am of everyone! Each person here is taking action to heal! THAT'S BIG!!!! If you are here, that's a positive step. Every person matters....every post matters!!! Stay strong everyone!! There is only one day this week you can change and that's TODAY ....so all you gotta do, is get thru this day! B
            All you gotta do, is get thru this day. AF 1/20/2011
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            Newbie's Nest

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              Newbies Nest

              Deep discussions so early this beautiful morning. Lovely! Enjoy your day everyone. I am planning to enjoy my AF Day 5! Cheers, LJ

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                Newbies Nest

                Day One (Feb 27 2013) behind me... Yay!

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                  Newbies Nest

                  mommyKW;1470695 wrote: Day One (Feb 27 2013) behind me... Yay!
                  Congrats! Keep up the amazing work mommyKW!

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                    Newbies Nest

                    Thank you, New Day.:l

                    From wishbone to backbone...I like it, too, Byrdie.

                    I thought this song may be helpful to some here.

                    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pZ_Bnu_RbQM[/video]]Gary Allan - Every Storm (Runs Out Of Rain) - Lyric Video - YouTube

                    "Every Storm (Runs Out Of Rain)"

                    I saw you standing in the middle of the thunder and lightning
                    I know you're feeling like you just can't win, but you're trying
                    It's hard to keep on keepin' on, when you're being pushed around
                    Don't even know which way is up, you just keep spinning down, 'round, down…

                    Every storm runs, runs out of rain
                    Just like every dark night turns into day
                    Every heartache will fade away
                    Just like every storm runs, runs out of rain

                    So hold your head up and tell yourself that there's something more
                    And walk out that door,
                    Go find a new rose, don't be afraid of the thorns
                    'Cause we all have thorns
                    Just put your feet up to the edge, put your face in the wind
                    And when you fall back down, keep on rememberin'

                    Every storm runs, runs out of rain
                    Just like every dark night turns into day
                    Every heartache will fade away
                    Just like every storm runs, runs out of rain

                    It's gonna run out of pain
                    It's gonna run out of sting
                    It's gonna leave you alone
                    It's gonna set you free
                    Set you free

                    Every storm runs, runs out of rain
                    Just like every dark night turns into day
                    Every heartache will fade away
                    Just like every storm runs, runs out of rain

                    It's gonna set you free,
                    It's gonna run out of pain,
                    It's gonna set you free

                    Love,

                    Slay:h
                    Rule your mind or it will rule you. It is from a thought that an action grows. :bat

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                      Newbies Nest

                      What MWO has taught me

                      Byrdlady;1470682 wrote: Mornin Nesters! That drunk lady on the bus IS all of us!! B
                      This morning at 8 a.m. as I was pumping gas, I saw a stooped-over man in shabby clothes leaving the station with a large package (12 cans?) of cheap beer in each hand. I watched as he slowly made his way across the gas bay and down the street. I suppose he was buying the day's "groceries". I'm sure this has played out before my eyes in the past but I have never seen it before. I have never felt anything. Today it made me cry.

                      Until I joined MWO, I had no idea what the lives of some people in alcohol's grip are like. Not being a beer drinker, I didn't know that a person could drink more than about 6. I didn't know that some people drink in the daytime or that others don't drink every day but still consider themselves to have a problem because they can't stop when they start. I didn't know that some people have to face my 4p.m. cravings for the whole damn time they are awake every day. And this blindness was in a person who drank too much wine most evenings. Maybe I thought everyone who drank too much did it like I did. Maybe I was so caught up with my own struggles, I didn't even see myself reflected in others. I don't know. But I'm about to start crying again as I sit here in a Starbuck's, waiting to get on with my trip.

                      I didn't really know how badly alcohol ruins lives even as it decimated mine. Today this is crushing me. I AM that sad man carrying his crappy booze home to sit and drink today.

                      I'm so sorry that I didn't know but I thank all of you for telling your truth here so that my stupid blind eyes are opening and I am seeing who you are - wonderful people who are working so hard to get out - and helping others get out - from under this enormous burden. I am seeing who I really am -- I am that lady on the bus and that man at the gas station and so many other wonderful but unseen people in this world who have had their lives hijacked by alcohol or another drug.

                      I'm not even sure what my point is other than we have to keep helping one another here and if we can, in the 'offline' world. I wish I could have chased that man down and somehow 'told' him what I have learned in the last 5 weeks. But you can't tell it. You have to live it and I am so grateful to all of you for giving me the chance. I am not going to let you, my family, or myself down.

                      Thank you for listening if you've made it this far. Maybe now I can continue my trip.

                      I love this forum and everyone here. NS

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                        Newbies Nest

                        Nosugar....what a beautiful eye opening inspirational post!
                        "Sometimes the strongest people are the ones who love beyond all faults, cry behind closed doors and fight battles that nobody knows about".
                        ~Author Unknown
                        AF since February 4, 2013

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                          Newbies Nest

                          I'm with you, Onered....for someone who didn't know how to say it, she sure said it beautifully. This is quite a journey. B
                          All you gotta do, is get thru this day. AF 1/20/2011
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                          Newbie's Nest

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                            Newbies Nest

                            NoSugar- I'm am standing and clapping. Thank you for that wonderful post. AMEN!!!!!!!!! I know exactly how you feel. It's like being "born again" and wanting to share the message of Christ to everyone, all at the same time.

                            .......and I tried your chicken finger recipe last night, big hit. Google "chocolate Chili" from the "Well Fed" Paleo cook book. It is amazing!


                            AF since 12/26/13

                            "...........just put one foot in front of the other and move forward. One step at a time." Chris McCombs

                            http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_dJ97Vwoup4

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                              Newbies Nest

                              Heart-Wrenching

                              NS, thank you for sharing such poignant thoughts. It is a heart-wrenching thing to suddenly "see," but recognizing that sadness and sharing it really helps to heal (and inspire) us all. Truth-telling is so important! :l:l:l LJ

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                                Newbies Nest

                                No sugar, that was a very honest and moving post. It brought tears to my eyes. How often we judge others without truly understanding the weight under which they are living or not living. This kind of moving experience is productive as it usually moves a person to reach out to others. It's akin to 'paying it forward'.

                                Thank you for your thoughts. :l

                                Love,

                                Slay
                                Rule your mind or it will rule you. It is from a thought that an action grows. :bat

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