Newbies Nest

[New Day]

Newbies Nest

Good Day Nesters......haven't posted here regularly as the thread moves so fast, I couldn't keep up with what was going on with everyone. Glad to see the Nest is busy and alive though. I'm on day 3 with a 7 day goal. I find it easier to cope that way than a big 30 day commitment in my head.
Looks like I've got lots of company!
I try and read everyday, but will also try and post briefly to stay accountable. Sorry if I can't respond to each of you individually, but please know I care about how everyone is doing and feeling.

Stayed up last night watching 3 hours of The Bachelor with my daughter and then couldn't fall asleep.....stupid idea! Might catch a 1/2 hour power nap before I have to pick up Grandson from daycare at Noon.

Hope everyone has a good strong day AF!

[Blossoms]

Newbies Nest

Aaah.... I'd gotten through the weekend and did pretty well and easily the last couple of nights.

Tonight a craving jumped out at me.... But my husband went off to get me a chocolate icecream that promises "a new level in chocolate enjoyment".
It seems to be helping which is good
I did pretty well today - spring cleaning and carting stuff off to a church for it's annual flea market and then going to my daughters school for a parents meeting that reached a whole new level of boring. That's one of the down side of doing it in a foreign language - you actually have to listen so you can know if it's important or not

[Caz 22]

Newbies Nest

Hi fellow MWO supporters.

Still sober,and it feels good.
As of tomorrow I may be off grid for a few weeks,I am going across the pond to look after my elderly Mother who needs some extra support with her growing needs.

Now you may well ask why I chose sobriety before embarking on what could potentially turn out to be a stressful situation.I need to test my free will and continue this journey with what everyday life comes my way and until my Mother drops off this mortal coil her growing older and looking after her will always have a level of stress to it.

I have a few tools up my sleeve for continued success, a few years ago I did an NLP course to help me deal with a certain poisonous situation at work,it was fab and worked.I will use the same skills towards my attitude to alcohol ( wish I had used those skills months ago ).
I have a friend back home who is a substance abuse councilor ( wish she lived closer to me a few months back ).

And lastly and most importantly,I have the support of every single one you guys that at one point know how I felt the moment I googled alchohol abuse and found this thread.
I am accountable to myself.my partner ( who is turning out to be my rock ) and each and everyone of you guys.

So if I don't post for a few weeks please don't think I have fallen off the face of the earth or given up the fight,it's just that my elderly Mother does not have internet access.

I am continuing my journey with determination and kindness within myself.

:l

[NoSugar]

Newbies Nest

New Day;1476582 wrote:
Stayed up last night watching 3 hours of The Bachelor with my daughter and then couldn't fall asleep.....stupid idea! Might catch a 1/2 hour power nap before I have to pick up Grandson from daycare at Noon. !

Hi, NewDay - My daughter, who I am visiting, and I have watched most of House of Cards on Netflix the last couple days -- and late into last night. You are right -- bad idea in terms of sleep!

Anyway, there is a depiction of an alcoholic in that show that is really hard to watch and sadly, quite realistic. It reminded me of watching Flight.

In any case, it was a good reminder of how I don't want to live.

Have a good day! NS

[Oneredshoe]

Newbies Nest

I wanted to do a quick pop in.....I am so loving the 311 gang! You guys rock and I will be checking in on your thread daily to see how all of you are doing. I hope that all of you will still pop in over here too.....have a wonderful strong AF day.

[Siren136]

Newbies Nest

NS, I recently started watching House of Cards, too. Only episode one at the moment. Thanks for the reminder, though. We lost the remote to the TV in my bedroom, so I only get one channel there. But now I remember that I can watch Netflix on my iPad, so I can stay away from the couch (which is where I tend to drink).

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Morning, Nesters! A dreary, rainy day in the Southern part of the nest. So good to see new faces...That first week is HARD, and it takes work and sharp elbows to get thru it. Be sure to read thru the Tool Box (link in my signature line below). When you have a craving or a thought that begins to take your hand and lead you to the rabbit hole...STOP it in its tracks! Say, NO, HELL NO, AL will not take one more day of my life! And set your mind to another task. If all else fails, get up from where you are and go to the bathroom, anything to break that mind loop. That first week, we have thoughts that 'poor me' can't do this, and 'poor me' can't do that...well before you 'pour me' another drink, try and put yourself in the service of someone else. Bake a batch of cookies and take them to a neighbor who doesn't get out much...or write someone a handwritten letter. Try and take the focus off what you are not getting and put it somewhere else. It helps!!

Jenn, I am reminded by your post to say to Super Newbie's....AL is AL, don't be fooled into thinking you can control it if you change it to another form. I was a vodka drinker, never had a problem with wine...until that's all I had. Wine was vodka with a mustache...it is all the same...so please, newbie's, don't be fooled into thinking that if your problem was with wine, you can now safely drink bourbon....your Dick Head brain knows the difference. Hells bells there at the end I drank peppermint schnapps to get a buzz!

Also, there are some very good documentaries under the general sessions tab. They are called 'Rain in my Heart'. They will get your attention! The first thing I wanted to say when I saw them was, 'thank God I wasn't this bad!' But as we all know, it is only a matter of time, this disease is progressive. You can stop while things aren't out of control or wait until they are. We made an analogy the other day...it is up to you where you want to get off the bus.

Lastly...stay connected here. Doesn't everyone have access to this site via phone? Don't lose this lifeline even when other things call you away. This is your grounding wire!! All the voices out there will tell you to drink...we are the ones that know you should not!! If you are traveling, make sure you plan to have access to this site....out of site is out of mind.

Protect your quits with your life. It's the foundation of everything else! Dig your heels in and don't give in no matter what and no matter who. It is NOT worth it. Byrdie

[Starfish1]

Newbies Nest

Good Morning, Nesters :l

Wow, this place is hoppin with eager baby birds. I am going to have to call in the troops on awards day to help award those (seven plus?) moons!!! Hope it's not chilly that day.

Hope everyone has a great day today. And like Birdie says, treat that dickhead AL like he's your mortal enemy. He IS!!!

I know those cravings are big and strong and scary- They still are for me, but each and every time you conquer them, those resistance muscles get a little bit stronger.

Keep up the GREAT WORK everyone- IT IS SO WORTH IT!!!

:h Star

[Slaythefear]

Newbies Nest

Good Morning Nesters! Quite a few newbies I see as I took a brief scan through the nest. All you day twoers now have something valuable. You have others to check in with and work together with to be successful. Having buddies is a great asset. Be sure to check in your day count on the Roll Call as it helps make it a bit more real to see your numbers add up, keep track of your buddies and see how others have achieved greater days.


[quote]

Hello Nest

Well, it is definitely the truth that not posting everyday is NOT a good idea. I've been swamped lately with work tasks and unfortunately my sobriety and sanity has suffered as a result. I need to get back into the good habit of checking in, posting accountability and trying to help where I can. Unfortunately the momentum of positivity that I had when I returned from the USA has fizzled out (somehow I knew this would happen). How does an adult develop confidence? LOL. Seems like I should have learned this a long time ago. I truly believe that if my confidence level was better... my entire life would be better! Including my battle with AL. So I have a therapy appointment today and a ton of work, but I will do my best to make the Nest my first stop every morning, no matter how many work tasks I have on my plate. I miss the interaction with you guys.

MS, how does an adult develop confidence? Just like a child. With each achievement and obstacle you overcome, you gain confidence. It is a process. The AL will sabotage that confidence every time. Make a goal, commit to it and as you begin to win the battle YOU will begin to feel that confidence in yourself. With each successful goal reached you will start working on other areas of your life with a clear head and have more goals to complete and more CONTROL over YOUR life which brings even more confidence. You have the ability all within yourself. You just have to tap into it and use it. It works.


Oneredshoe, Chewy seems to be just fine now...better than just fine...happy and an energetic little Chin. His toe is still large, but is not red any longer and there is no sign of pain or sickness, so I think I caught it in time. I still feel bad for the poor little guy. He was running around this morning making his happy chirp and running on top of me when I lied down on the floor. He's so darn cute. I'm fully attached now. A unique pet, but a lovable one.

Bobby, stay strong...your head will get cleaner and clearer and you'll be able to make good decisions to handle this relationship drama you are caught up in. It's the best thing you can do for yourself right now to help the situation.:l

I didn't fully read the nest, just a quick scan, so I hope everyone is doing well. I'll try to pick out a person or two when I'm here to give some motivation or hugs, to.


Stay strong and determined, slay those fears, and win this battle.

Love,

Slay

[nonamegirl]

Newbies Nest

in the dumps

Hi, all,
So, today is day 11 AF for me, and I know that is something to celebrate. And I've been exercising and writing and talking with people who care and petting my critters... and I know I should be feeling better but I am really so very very sad in my heart. And for no reason. I do know that I was self-medicating before... but $#&@ it, it made me feel better! So, I have made an appointment with my doc to get antidepressants again. I don't like the side effects, but this black hole spiral doesn't seem to be a good thing. Sorry to be a downer. I will write again when I feel better.

[Jagman]

Newbies Nest

Hi all, I'm back....on day 3. I got to day 11 last week but it was my birthday and I gave in to fizzy wine, and the rest.
Anyway not finding it that difficult this time round and that 10 days AF made such a difference to my mental and physical state it's a real motivation to keep it going. I'm honestly much beter off it - Shame it took me so long to work it out.
Have a good day eveyone.

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Noname, maybe you could give being AF a good solid chance before going on an AD. Give your body some time to heal. I have found the fewer meds I take, the better I feel. AD are serious meds, and drs write them like they are giving out candy. They are hard as hell to get off of, too. AL is the biggest depressant of all, if you give it a good honest shot, maybe you will find the fog will lift. Give yourself a chance before numbing up again with AD...(can you tell I had a bad experience? Getting off Cymbalta was the WORST thing mentally and physically I've ever done).

Get yourself to Day 13, that's when something clicked in my head, and I knew this was something I could do. Beware of the pity party...they are easy to throw, fun to attend and hard to leave. Try and turn this around and do something for someone else...give it a whirl!! It's a lot less trouble than an AD! And works 1000 times better IMHO. Give yourself some time, we sure didn't get into this mess overnight, and it takes a bit of time to fix it!! B

[almost free]

Newbies Nest

Hey Onered, I like it: The 311 gang. It is great to do this with others. Makes it more exciting in the good times, and makes one not want to let one's fellow starters down when the times are not so good. When I was feeling weak, I would think: 'Hey, things aren't going peachy for RC, either, but he's still hangin' in there. You should, too'. It helps.

NoNameGirl, I agree with Byrdie. Don't rush to get back on anti-depressants. There is a website called Ask a Patient.com. You can type in any med and get feedback from scores of actual users, both good and bad. It will give you a lot of information, and the experience of actual users. It is very comprehensive, giving each persons original diagnosis, their age, what dose they were on, how long they were on it, etc. It is a real eye opener.

I always suffered from depression. I've heard the ADs are better now, but I went on ADs when I was twenty. I'm middle aged now. It was the closest I have ever been to suicide in my life. I will never forget that hellish black hole I found myself in. I still shudder when I think of it. And this was before I ever drank alcohol. They've since discovered that ADs can be dangerous, with just such side effects for young adults.

I believe that part of the sad feeling we have when we quit AL, is partly a feeling of grief; we have given up a source of comfort and our main coping mechanism. Further, we don't have anything yet to replace all those hours we spent drinking. It's also like the end of an abusive relationship: you still mourn the good times, even though you were hurt so badly. 'Why did it have to turn out this way?'.

One thing that helped me a lot, in addition to quitting the alcohol, was attention to diet and supplements. I cut out all sugar, very limited grains and fruit, and focused on whole, nutrient rich foods. I cultivated a habit of green tea, with lots of lemon. I started feeling energetic and optimistic. Better than I have ever felt. I lost 30 lbs in two months and was able to get two years of sobriety. A weak moment took me down and back to square one.

Many people swear by St. John's Wort, but it should NOT be taken along with anti-depressants. Others swear by exercise, starting with only a brisk, short walk. One step at a time. Give the natural path a go, before starting back on ADs.

Give that website a scan (Ask a Patient.com). I typed in various meds, just out of curiosity, and it was shocking! Try Paxil....any of them. There are always a few who feel that various meds saved their lives, but so many more who wish they had never started them.

One of the biggest problems is getting off them. There is also the issue for young women, of an unexpected pregnancy. Some of these meds can cause birth defects. And the young woman will still have to take them, in order to wean off.

Good luck and stay close. I believe it helps with that empty feeling to feel connected to others who care. We are here for you and are happy to listen and give our feedback and support. Hugs!

All you other nesters, have a great AF day!

[Pinecone]

Newbies Nest

Hello friends,

Mein, your question about confidence is a good one, and it made me think. Having been reading here for a little while, it is fascinating to watch people acquire confidence and competence in their sobriety. There seems to be a tipping point somewhere which is probably the result of earnest, accumulated effort in one direction. I think you have to keep the heat on this thing. It seems like going backwards intentionally is really damaging. A lot of folks who just keep at it and stay on here even with their struggles eventually hit that tipping point. I think it is a wonderful question to work on.


Have a great AF day friends.

[K9Lover]

Newbies Nest

Noname,
Byrdie and Almostfree gave some excellent advice to not rush back into AD. Talking to your doctor is a good idea, but maybe the two of you can come up with an alternate plan first. I am on Prozac and I really wish I wasn't. I am going to the doctor in April so I will discuss how to get off of it. Last time I was on AD I quit abruptly...I didn't have any side effects because I went back to drinking! That's not a road I want to go back down! Exercise has been a lifesaver for me...I am now in my 4th week and I feel amazing. Anyway...I hope you feel better soon!