Newbies Nest

[jenniech]

Newbies Nest

Hey MS!!
My sober date, 1/28, happens to be the day AFTER my 49th birthday.
So, from now on, when my birthday arrives, I will remember it as the last day I drank....And when I am 50, I will be living a sober, healthy life.....A good way to start the next 50 years of my life!!!

[jenniech]

Newbies Nest

Here is my party for NoSugar.....come join!!!
Congratulations on 90 days NS!!!!
:alf::hug::disco::dancin::crazymonkey:

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Good morning, Nesters! And a hearty welcome to our New Newbies and returning Newbies!!
NoSugar makes a wonderful point, and if I may say, approached this task as someone who was on a job campaign. She used every available tool. She tore into this site and ferreted out people who were doing what she wanted to do and she followed their progress to see what they were doing. I may be speaking for her (and she is quite capable of speaking for herself, but this is observational) but she put into place the things that worked and eliminated the things that didn't. Now that sounds simple, but there is a lot more to it. As ALK's (or whatever you want to call us) we will often listen to what we want to hear. We will go looking for a way to try and control this thing. I'll have to put my hand up here, because I was one of them. I never drank harder than the year I tried to moderate. After all, didn't we try and control it before we ever got here? Yes, I know I did. So finally what I did, is I tracked people who were doing what I wanted to do...the ones that continued to drink continued to be in a mindless circle of guilt/shame/remorse. The ones that completely stopped drinking and had a policy of Zero Tolerance seemed to be the happiest. They were talking about other things...like gardening, and life and not the constant struggle of when/how much I can drink. I found the hardliners, like Lav...were free! The ones that were 'moderating' were still tethered to The Beast. I choose to stop fighting a losing battle. It IS a choice....and it IS a losing battle. Whatever your relationship is today with AL is as good as it will ever be. I say, 'as good' because it can and will get worse. You can trust me on that one. So I would urge you, just as NoSugar did, to dive into this site and read back... look at people's sober dates, and follow the ones that succeed! Hitch your wagon to success and you will find it.
I know in those first struggling months I had, I'd say, " I was sober a LOT more that I was drunk...I had X number of sober days last month!" Hummmm... Is that really an accomplishment......do normal people say these things? No, they do not. I am not a normal drinker. For US....one drink is too many. One night is too much....Don't let AL rob you of one more day of your life!!! Not drinking is so much easier/better/ simpler/cheaper/more peaceful than drinking ever was. Each one of us here are doing what we once thought was impossible...and we have been doing it one day/one craving/ one 15 minute interval at a time.
I hope everyone has an easy day today!!! MindPeace, Byrdie

[Cocoflo]

Newbies Nest

Good Morning,

MS, don't beat yourself up. I'm at 6 days and 20 is a huge accomplishment from my perspective. I'm not really one that should offer advise at this point, but don't let a single slip-up derail your hard work!!

Eiti & Kambob, welcome. I am also newer to this journey. Eiti, I can truly relate - I've gone 1 or 2 days, only to drink WAY too much, regret it and then vow to never drink again. It is a vicious cycle that I want to escape. I'm starting small, just trying to get through each day, as just getting to 3 days initially seemed impossible.

The encouragement that you will find here is invaluable. Everyone has truly been there & knows how you feel. As I have been advised, post regularly. That has really kept me on track so far. Planning my days & toolbox have also been a tremendous help.

Lav, I'm looking forward to gardening this year. I've have lots of ideas on Pinterest - I just need to pick something & execute.

Best,
Coco

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Mr. G, I had it forefront in my mind to welcome you to the nest, but got sidetracked. It will be our distinct honor to bestow your hat at 7 days! That's a big deal around here! We are so happy to have you here! Here's the butt Velcro! XO, Byrdie

[K9Lover]

Newbies Nest

Here I am Siren!

Thanks for checking on me. I wasn't online over the weekend, and then yesterday (Monday) I called in "sick". You know how Mondays are sometimes. LOL

I'm really trying to transfer to a new department, so my enthusiasm for this one has gone completely out the window. I better not let it get too low, I might be stuck here!

Welcome to Eiti and Kambob! We are glad to have you here! You'll find so much support here. I owe my life to MWO and Antabuse. Please stick close...I look forward to getting to know both of you!

Well everyone, have a happy Tuesday (really, it's only Tuesday?)

Oh and Mr. G...this is for you :l:h:l:h:l

[Pinecone]

Newbies Nest

Wow, 90 days for NoSugar?!?! That is just outstanding. Like Byrdlady, I would just like to join in with admiration. You have put in the hard work, and always seem to have time to support others. I'm very glad you're here in the nest. I'm so happy for you!

Welcome Eiti and Kambob! Glad you found us. Stay close and just start posting. We've been through it all here, but this is the place to get better.

Byrdie, thank you yet again for yet another inspirational post. When I first came here, I remember the first time I read one of your great, rousing posts. I remember thinking, "Damn! I want to feel like that too!"

Great to see you all today. Have a great AF day, friends.

[LittleLottie]

Newbies Nest

Hi, I joined 35 days ago and have managed to not drink for 37 so far. I'm not an alcoholic, more of a binge drinker and after my last drunken night and awful hangover I decided I wanted to try being one of those people that could enjoy a night out without alcohol....and i think i've cracked it! I didn't realise how often I drank until I tried the 30 day challenge which really made me think about how much damage I was doing to myself! I got through my birthday which was hard because my mum and sister love a drink, it didn't help that my mum bought me a huge bottle of Bacardi (which is still unopened and at my sisters), nights out down the pub and even a school reunion with friends in a lively bar! Each time I drank coke, lemonade or red bull out of a wine glass and just joked it was psychological and it really helped! And the caffeine made me stay awake longer than the others. The first caffeine comedown the next morning wasn't nice though, so now I drink less coke too. The other night I only spent ?5!!!! I came back with ?40! That's never happened to me before!

My tips and things to remember for anyone like me is 1) drink from a wine glass no matter what soft drink it is. 2) really read and understand that temptation comes and goes in waves, you just need to distract yourself when it happens. 3) if your already enjoying yourself then you don't need alcohol to make it more fun, if anything it will only go down hill from there. 4) try the 30 day challenge! 3) watch your friends get drunk and imagine them hungover the next day, then think that could be you. 4) think of the money you save. 5) and lastly, now you can make plans the day after a night out instead of spending it in bed hungover.


My next 30 day challenge is no chocolate! It's been 6 days and I'm struggling lol.

Good luck

Little Lottie x

[free at last]

Newbies Nest

Have been reading posts in the nest and wanted to add my HUGE CONGRATs to NoSugar on 90 days AF -- you are an example for all of us on taking a scientific approach to removing alcohol from our lives. Thanks for the encouragment you provide to me and so many others.

And a quick note to OneRedShoe regarding Maggie's travels -- just keep humming, "Don't Worry, Be Happy. Every little thing is going to be ok....." Thanks, to you ORS for the encouragement you also provide to us with less than 30 AF days under our belt.

And, of course, thanks to those stalwart supporters -- Brydie, Kuyu, Lavande, K9, and others.

Am doing well -- continuing to rack up AF days in an effort to finally be done with this drug.

[kuya]

Newbies Nest

Hi Little Lottie and :welcome: to MWO.

Big congrats on your 37 days that is awesome.........keep on trucking.

I look forward to being a year sober to experience how that feels.....after 23 years of drinking the repair is gradual, but the continuing change is amazing. Even at 8 months I still notice things e.g. I have suffered insomnia all my life but in the last month I am falling asleep like normal people. I eat well and enjoy my food and my weight is decreasing without effort. I have been able to address my smoking as I am so much more relaxed......which is self fulfilling.

I am told total repair takes two years and that is also when people are unlikely to relapse.

[jenniech]

Newbies Nest

I picked up a tidbit today that really resounded with me.

When I drank, I was alone with my thoughts. I either drank to get away from everyone, drank because I was better than anyone else (right) or drank because I was in the dumps and I felt that everyone was better than me....it was always for isolation.....even at parties it was isolating. I was a very lonely drunk even if I was surrounded by many people. It prevented me from connecting.

To get sober, I had to get out of the isolation.... you can't get sober alone!! You need to reach out to others and share....that is crucial. So as a first step I came here and shared my thoughts, feelings, experiences.....the more sober I became, the more I was able to connect with my family and friends. It has really been quite miraculous.

I wish I could express this better. It doesn't sound as profound as when I heard it earlier today...all I know is, I no longer feel so isolated. I no longer feel like I am the only one that has my problems and no one else could possibly understand. That is just my AL brain lying to me. It is so relieving and comforting to know I am not alone.:h

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Jenni, I think you described it perfectly. Altho we are all from different parts of the world and a variety of circumstances, the foe we face is the same. All the reasons we give to drink it comes down to isolating ourselves with our drug. Now THAT is a sobering thought. Byrdie

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Good evening nesters!

A big CONGRATS to NS for 90 AF days ~ awesome

MS - you did exactlty what I wanted you to do
You traced back through your steps & thoughts that led to your decision to drink. You figured out 'why' now you have to figure out how you are going to handle similar thoughts & feelings in the future AF. Happy belated birthday by the way!!!!

Hello & welcome Lottie & congrats to you on your AF time, nice!
Please stick around for a while.

G, I'm sorry I missed whatever was going on with you. I hope you are OK & glad to see you here in the nest, safe & sound :l

Greetings to everyone & wishes for a safe night in the nest!
Lav

[kreeves]

Newbies Nest

NS Congratulations on 90 days! Wow- hearing your success gives me inspiration to stay focused!
LL congrats on 37 days!

[kuya]

Newbies Nest

jenniech;1496168 wrote: I picked up a tidbit today that really resounded with me.

When I drank, I was alone with my thoughts. I either drank to get away from everyone, drank because I was better than anyone else (right) or drank because I was in the dumps and I felt that everyone was better than me....it was always for isolation.....even at parties it was isolating. I was a very lonely drunk even if I was surrounded by many people. It prevented me from connecting.

To get sober, I had to get out of the isolation.... you can't get sober alone!! You need to reach out to others and share....that is crucial. So as a first step I came here and shared my thoughts, feelings, experiences.....the more sober I became, the more I was able to connect with my family and friends. It has really been quite miraculous.

I wish I could express this better. It doesn't sound as profound as when I heard it earlier today...all I know is, I no longer feel so isolated. I no longer feel like I am the only one that has my problems and no one else could possibly understand. That is just my AL brain lying to me. It is so relieving and comforting to know I am not alone.:h

This post brought tears to my eyes. I am so happy for you :l:l