Newbies Nest

[Cocoflo]

Newbies Nest

Good morning,

Sounds like everyone is staying strong despite temptation or pressure to drink. One red shoe, it is too bad that your friend is not supportive, but I admire your strength.

Happy sober Saturday,
Cocoflo

[NoSugar]

Newbies Nest

Go Jenniech!

Congratulations on 90 days of success, Quit-Buddy Jennie!



As the wise ones in the nest say, one day at a time!!!
There sure can't be any resting on laurels around here, can there?

Have a wonderful day!

[jenniech]

Newbies Nest

thank you so much NoSugar....I can't tell you enough how much your support means to me....And Lavande - always full of true wisdom....you are right, I need to clean out the house of my brain...I don't need that useless clutter stressing me out!! I can't say why, but I knew if I fessed up and told the nest how i was feeling, that I would get posts back that would set me straight. It is just a matter of choice and I choose to NOT dwell on what could happen in the future. I am focusing on TODAY and today I am 90 days free

[Nursie]

Newbies Nest

Congratulations Jennie and NoSug!! 90 day power!!
I am right behind you with 69 days. We can do this!

I have been having some brutal cravings. Last night, my dreams gave me the reinforcement I needed. I dreamt I was on a plane, drunk and couldn't find my belongings. Then I missed the next plane and lost my cell phone. Then I went out with co-workers and got completely smashed and blacked out. Didnt realize I went out with the co-workers until the next day when the shame and horror hit me.
What a terrible dream! I was so happy when I woke up to 69 days sober.
Hope everyone has a completely lovely Saturday!

[NoSugar]

Newbies Nest

Nursie;1497725 wrote: Congratulations Jennie and NoSug!! 90 day power!!
I am right behind you with 69 days. We can do this!

I have been having some brutal cravings. Last night, my dreams gave me the reinforcement I needed. I dreamt I was on a plane, drunk and couldn't find my belongings. Then I missed the next plane and lost my cell phone. Then I went out with co-workers and got completely smashed and blacked out. Didnt realize I went out with the co-workers until the next day when the shame and horror hit me.
What a terrible dream! I was so happy when I woke up to 69 days sober.
Hope everyone has a completely lovely Saturday!

Your dream makes me almost prefer the ones I have where I am in public with no pants on!! :H

Try to catch us, Nursie!! But Jennie and I are not gonna quit!

:h NS

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Morning, Nesters! Gosh, it's a big day of awards today! Patrick with his bad self and Jenni approaching the 'old folks home' in terms of days!!! Bahahaha! Coco in double digits! It's heartwarming to see! It is amazing to see the differences in people in such a short amount of time! Is it a miracle? Sometimes it sure seems like it. The light bulb that always goes off after AL is out of our systems: DAM, it really WAS the AL!!!

Jenni, I'm so glad you confided in us. I have one word for you: Euphoric Recall. Ok that's 2 words, but this a biggie. You can do a quick search on this site and there is an entry about it in the Tool Box, but long story short, this is where we look back with longing eyes and taste buds and only remember the wonderful things about our drinking. Mario, in his Tool Box entry, gives a sobering account of it....I'll try to find that for you. Anyway, it's like when you look back at a relationship and think, "Now why did I let him go? What was I thinking? He was a real catch, maybe I didn't give him a fair chance!" And what happens when you get back together with this loser? Yep, you broke up for a reason....it wasn't working. The day we joined this site we had had enough 'fun' to last a lifetime. Long story short (and perhaps too late) is that this is normal! We all have these thoughts. Being armed with that is helpful, I think. I know you won't let it derail you. That's what's so great about this site, you can actually go back and look at your early posts and just see what pain this caused you. It usually straightens me right out. Just like hearing what OneRed's friend said to her....'just one night won't hurt you' and "I miss my drinking buddy"....when you see this over and over in the nest, it becomes almost funny when someone pulls it out on you!
Stay strong everyone, and keep stringing those numbers up! Every day you put between you and AL is a good day and a victory! Well done, everyone! Byrdie

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Euphoric Recall

I found it! This is from Mario:

mario;1005640 wrote: Yesterday i was standing outside of a pub in my area and you could here all the noise and laughter coming out,and it started getting me thinking of was i missing anything as i thought they all seemed to be having a great time,i then followed my thoughts through and wondered were would they all be in a few hours ? drunk, talking stupid, sick, broke ?Thinking about using alcohol and other drugs increases the risk of relapse. Thinking is a cognitive process controlled by the cerebral cortex or thinking part of the brain. There are three ways of thinking about alcohol that are particularly dangerous.

The first is called euphoric recall. You remember and exaggerating the good times that you had when using alcohol and other drugs while blocking out or minimizing the bad times.

A recovering person who called himself Jake the Snake used to tell the story of the great time he had when he got stoned on cocaine and stole $150,000 worth of coke from his supplier and went off for a marvelous one week binge in Las Vegas. He forgot to mention that he caught a serious venereal disease from a prostitute, and was nearly killed when his supplier showed up to get his coke back. After being shot and taken to the emergency room, the police found a small bag of cocaine and some marijuana in Jake?s room and he ended up in jail and was serving a seven year sentence when I talked with him. He still argues that he had a good time.

The second relapse-prone way of thinking is called Awfulizing Abstinence. You think about all of the bad times associated with being alcohol free while blocking out and minimizing all of the good times.

A woman named Jessie told me that nothing was working out for her since she got sober and she felt she would be better off to start drinking again. When Jessie was drinking she was unemployed, earning money by prostitution, and was in a skid row cubicle hotel. Now she was physically healthy, working a regular job, and sharing a decent apartment in a middle class neighborhood with two women she got to know through her home group of Alcoholics Anonymous (AA). But in her her mind, at that moment, she felt her sobriety was awful, terrible, and unbearable.

The third relapse prone way of thinking is called magical thinking about use. Cognitive therapists call this positive expectancy. We start to believe that using alcohol will somehow magically fix out problems and make our lives better. WE forget that alcohol makes us feel good for a little while and then wipes out our judgment and impulse control setting us off into a cycle of self-destructive behaviors that destroys us and those that we love.

People who relapse often begin to spend of their time cycling between these three ways of relapse prone thinking. They remember drinking and exaggerate the good times while refusing to think about any pain or problems. They exaggerate all the pain and problems of living sober while blocking out any benefits. They then begin to think about how alcohol could magically fix them and make everything in their life wonderful once again. This creates a strong desire to use alcohol......I needed this today as reminder :goodjob:

[Oneredshoe]

Newbies Nest

What Jeni 90 days........YEAH!!!!!! Congratulations!!!!!!!!!?!

[halo]

Newbies Nest

No Sugar and Jenniech BIG CONGRATS on your 90 days, just wanted to say as well, that I love your presence and posts on the Nest, find it very comforting having you both around!
Giving you a celebratory wave..

:wave::wave::wave:

Keep up the awesome work, I want to be where you are one day

[Guitarista]

Newbies Nest

Hola Nesters near and not so far!

Mighty stuff Jennie and No sugar, and Nursie on 69 days! Wow!

Thanks for the above re-post from Mario, Byrdy. It's important for me to acknowledge that booze does make me feel good for a little while, but then as the post states above, I will lose sense of judgement and then it's game on. This always takes me to a de-sensitized, numbed out limbo where I am not living, I am just existing. Where my life is neither here nor there. I was like this for years, wasting away a precious, valuable spirit that is here to shine. No more.

Kick some ass in yer own way y'all.

Day 8.

[jenniech]

Newbies Nest

byrd - that was so incredibly helpful.....i have so much gratitude!!!
Just took a nice snooze in the sun, read my book, and now I am getting psychologically ready to go out to dinner with friends who have been bugging us for MONTHS.
will order sparkling water with a twist of lemon.....walking through the night AF before I get there.....that will help

[kuya]

Newbies Nest

Oneredshoe;1497604 wrote: Good evening Nesters....
I have something "funny" to share, not by way of "funny" ha ha, but maybe more of an awkward, felt like a teenager being put under pier pressure. I had a friend of mine really try to put me under the gun tonight about getting together before I leave insisting that we really needed to plan a "drinking" night. She knows I have quit and I was very honest with her about why, so I reminded her of the fact that I no longer drink. Oh my gosh she was trying to bargain on my behalf, "it would only be one night". "Oh my gosh I'm not going to see you for 2 years" "come on a couple of drinks won't kill you". She ended with "I really miss my drinking friend". I have to say it was amusing to listen to her and empowering to say "NO"

If only it were possible to show folk how much fun can be had sober.

Last night I went to see a film with my son, his GF and my daughter. We went for dinner after and spent two hours having a fabulous time.......we were laughing so much I am sure other diners thought we WERE drunk! :H

My son no longer drinks as he is prediabetic and as a family we support each other's new healthy lifestyle.

It was not as if this were a rare meet up .....only on Wednesday did we meet for dinner then stayed up till 2am watching youtube clips and laughing hard at the world and sharing new things we have encountered.

Neither of these things would have happened when I was drinking......I would have been 'too tired' ( hungover)

[kuya]

Newbies Nest

jenniech;1497703 wrote: thank you so much NoSugar....I can't tell you enough how much your support means to me....And Lavande - always full of true wisdom....you are right, I need to clean out the house of my brain...I don't need that useless clutter stressing me out!! I can't say why, but I knew if I fessed up and told the nest how i was feeling, that I would get posts back that would set me straight. It is just a matter of choice and I choose to NOT dwell on what could happen in the future. I am focusing on TODAY and today I am 90 days free
Nursie;1497725 wrote: Congratulations Jennie and NoSug!! 90 day power!!
I am right behind you with 69 days. We can do this!

I have been having some brutal cravings. Last night, my dreams gave me the reinforcement I needed. I dreamt I was on a plane, drunk and couldn't find my belongings. Then I missed the next plane and lost my cell phone. Then I went out with co-workers and got completely smashed and blacked out. Didnt realize I went out with the co-workers until the next day when the shame and horror hit me.
What a terrible dream! I was so happy when I woke up to 69 days sober.
Hope everyone has a completely lovely Saturday!

This is the power and the beauty of this forum.

None of us would succeed in this venture without the reinforcement, love and support of this forum IMO......I know I would, long ago, have succumbed to the 'just one' temptation.

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

This is where I finally understood that there's no such thing as one kuya

We truly do benefit from each other's strength & wisdom. Grateful for MWO!

[Persephone1]

Newbies Nest

I got your :heart:note NoSugar ~ you are adorable, thank you. I'm just gonna call you Sugar, that's more fitting!

Hope you are all having a comfy evening in the nest...:l P.