Newbies Nest

[bcp2013]

Newbies Nest

Princess,this is a very good site,you can achieve your goal,and congrats on 100 days sober,jenny,spider,this site is really good,love coming here and reading all your posts,so thanks for that!

[hadit]

Newbies Nest

Just found out my son and his wife are separating. I have a Grand son 13 yo in lock up for drug abuse and breaking and entering.My best mate has been diagnosed with cancer. I have been married 42 years and am a good hard working person. Just feel like drinking myself into oblivian!! Sorry to rant just need help right now.. XXX

[jenniech]

Newbies Nest

Hadit
Life really really sucks sometimes. But think it through. If you drink and reach oblivion what then? You pass out and then wake up hungover. Maybe you vomit, maybe you don't but you will feel like SHIT physically that is for sure. And mentally how will you feel? Even WORSE than you feel right now. You will feel depressed and anxious. How would you getting drunk help your wife, son, grandson or friend?

Take this energy of wanting to drink and do something else. Move a muscle will change a thought. Maybe go for a good long walk and then make a meal for your friend? Do anything but drink because that will help NO ONE, least of all you.

Don't cave in to the "fuck its".....that is just the disease talking. It really is not what you want, right?

And, needless to say, I am so very sorry for your troubles.:soothe:

[jenniech]

Newbies Nest

BCP2013
Don't listen to your friend. She is selfishly thinking that she is losing a drinking buddy. She is not thinking about YOU. I had similar reactions so I just stopped seeing friends in drinking settings for a while. But if you are going to be arounds friends who drink and who expect you to drink with them, it might be better to come up with some little white lie so they don't question you. You could say you are trying to lose weight (although by your picture, you don't look like you need to ) Or maybe you are on an antibiotics. Or maybe you are the designated driver....or maybe you don't know why, but you just don't feel like drinking because last time you drank you got really really sick. Some excuse like those might shut them up. Or, you could try faking it. Bring your own AF beer and pour it in a glass so people think you are drinking but you are not. At this stage of the game, you don't need other people questioning why you are stopping and you surely don't need people talking you out of remaining AF.....plus, it is really none of their business.

[MinStar]

Newbies Nest

Checking in. Sorry been away and landed back with my feet running. Haven't had time to check back posts and probably won't until tomorrow. Just wanted to say hello and wish everyone a h and h al free Wednesday. Xxx

[Noor]

Newbies Nest

Still feeling a bit vague and lost, physical symptoms more or less gone apart from post cigs hacking cough which is disgusting! But mentally am still tired and fragile. Don't underestimate how long this stuff takes, a mate of mine who has been clean fove years now said the first six months he reckons his body was adjusting. I am trying to be understanding of the process even whilst feeling impatient that I am not achieving things at a rate I am happy with....

[princessjolsin]

Newbies Nest

kuya;1502626 wrote: CONGRATULATIONS TO JENNI AND SPIDEY!

Well done you two.

Spidey did you get the four month magic? I felt sooooo much better from there.

Jenni you have worked so hard for this, I know in a few days the peace will descend and the 'battle' will ease to occasional skirmishes.

:welcome: to Princess......I hope you are inspired to kick this demon out of your life. It only gets worse.
It is common for partners to be dismissive, it is not THEIR body and mind. They also may feel you are highlighting their own problem AND they don't want to lose their drinking buddy.

Thanks kuya!! It most certainly is a demon!! I can't wait to be like jenni, and all of you..saying bye bye!! I don't need alcohol anymore!!

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Good morning Nesters

Noor, healing takes time, some will heal faster than others. Help yourself along by eating healthy, getting some fresh air & exercise, taking supplements, etc. I know it took about a year after I stopped drinking & smoking to really feel better. I didn't know what it felt like to be a non-smoking adult, honestly. Hang in there

Hello & welcome Hadit!
Life does seem to pile up but giving up is not your only choice. You can choose to take back control & put yourself on a path of healing & growth, I did. We all have the strength within ourselves to do this

BCP, your friend obviously doesn't understand & that's OK. Just don't let her derail you because you are doing great!

Wishing everyone a great AF Wednesday!
Lav

[rooniferd]

Newbies Nest

jenniech;1502647 wrote: Life is beautiful without alcohol!!!

Isn't it, though??? I am LOVING the sober life. I still have all those post-its around my house reminding me of the horrors of drinking so I don't forget how bad it is. I don't want to go back to that hell hole. It really is a nightmare.

[rooniferd]

Newbies Nest

I was reading another forum on this site yesterday, and someone had posted something about the reasons why he was hesitant to quit drinking. One of those reasons was that he thought that life might become boring. For so long, he had filled his days hanging out with drinking buddies, going to parties, cheering on games at his favorite bar, etc. Now, if he quit drinking, what in the world would he do? Sit and home and be bored? Spend endless days and nights watching the TV and wishing he were having fun?

I used to feel like that too. Unlike a lot of people on this site who drink/drank in the privacy of their homes, I am a bar fly. Drinking is a synonym for socializing, in my eyes. All my friends drink. All my activities involve drinking in some form or another.

Now turn all those present tense verbs in the previous paragrah to past tense verbs.....

That whole notion of me - the barfly - is starting to change. I've had some pretty significant spurts of sobriety in the past few months (mostly thanks to Antabuse), and I've seen the other side. I've seen that this whole notion of sitting around bored when you're not drinking just isn't the case at all. I mean, gosh, I'm not saying you don't have some of those nights (especially in the beginning when your phone is constantly ringing, your buddies are urging you to come out, and the cravings are bad). But as time passes, you find yourself filling that time with other things - other activities that don't involve the beast.

You wake up one day and wonder how you ever had time to sit at that damn bar for four hours every night after work and all weekend long. You have discovered a whole world out there, and it feels good! You start making new friends. You start rediscovering life, as if you are a reborn child. Seeing sunsets through clear eyes is mindblowing. Oh, and the mornings....don't get me started.

I love waking up feeling refreshed. I know exactly what I did the night before. My house is orderly. My pets are well fed and happy. My car is sitting safely in my garage with no mysterious scratches from the night before. I know exactly where my purse and phone are. I remember every conversation from the night before. I didn't blow 50 bucks at the bar!

Life is truly wonderful when you kick the beast out of it!

[kuya]

Newbies Nest

Rooni.....all this is so good to hear you say. It is hard to convince people early in their quit how good sobriety feels.

Like you I don't know how I spent four hours a night drinking when now there are not enough hours in the day

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

QUOTE=little beagle;1502605]Contracts jennie
hello Fin. Still hanging in there?

little beagle;1502615 wrote: damn auto correct on smart phone!!

Two things here, I am practicing my quote things (thank you NoSugar!!!) #2 I thought this was hilarious from little B!!! Auto correct: Love it or Hate it? I should do a poll!

Good Morning, Nesters! Hadit, welcome! Jenni nailed it....sometimes life just sucks. I try to look at it that everyone has really bad patches and it's just MY turn. You will be amazed at how many of your life's problem will somehow fade when you get yourself out from under the influence of AL. (when I was drunk I used to call it the Affluence of Inkahol....thought that was just hilarious! Now? Not so much......) Most things in our lives improve when you get AL out of it! (I have found). We're glad you are here....rant away, that's what friends are for!
Have the best day you can make it!! Byrdie

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Ooops....looks like I need to practice some more...one took and one didn't!!! B

[Fin]

Newbies Nest

little beagle;1502605 wrote: Contracts jennie
hello Fin. Still hanging in there?

Hey little beagle! Thanks for the note. Yep, still fighting the good fight on day 37...a new high water mark for me. Yahoooooooooooooooo. Hope you are well tooooooooooo. Off to my morning mandolin practice with a clear and inspired mindset. What could be better? Have a great AF day everyone!

Be good,
-Fin

[Fin]

Newbies Nest

jenniech;1502647 wrote: you guys have brought tears to my eyes....thank you SO MUCH for all of your encouragement and support. Speaking from experience, you REALLY CAN NOT do this alone. Without my friends here on MWO I would be lost.
I am honored and happy to have gotten to know each and everyone of you and I really look forward to getting to know, helping and encouraging all of you who are new!!!
It is a rollercoaster ride but oh, so worth it. Life is beautiful without alcohol!!!

Simply awesome. At 100 days there's absolutely no reason to ever go back. See you there in July...July 10th to be exact. Thanks for leading the way...