Newbies Nest

[Guitarista]

Newbies Nest

Break a string guy's!

Hi Nester's,

Hope all are good. Strapping in. day 4.

G.

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Hey Texas...I'm sure others will weigh in on this, but the way I see it, my problem with AL is mine. I cannot be concerned with what is in someone else's glass. My husband drinks also, has a beer and a glass of wine each night. If I wanted to, I could obsess over that, but drinking is my problem, not his. People all around us will be drinking that's part of what we have to learn about this disease...we will always be doing something a little differently from the rest of the crowd. Maybe you could ask him to keep it out of your sight? Be sure that it's not being kept in the fridge or guess who will be in it! Get all that AL out of your space! Surround yourself with things you love to do and eat. Keep your eye on the prize (never having to do this again!). Keep your quit no matter what and no matter who! Come Monday morning, you will be so glad you did! Weekends are always going to happen, we have to adjust our thinking about them. They are just days of the week. You can do this! We'll be right here to help you. AND, we are doing it, too. If an old drunk of 25 years can do this, I know a strapping Texan like you can, too!! It's a mindset. You WILL succeed!

Have a safe, cozy night in the nest all! Byrdie

[Guitarista]

Newbies Nest

Byrdy.

No subject, just........:h:h:h

[Overit44]

Newbies Nest

Hi everyone. Just 2 seconds to post today.

Is it Kuya's birthday? Congrats Wise One! I love everything you have to say.

It's good to see T-2 hanging around again. I really missed you.

gotta run!

[little beagle]

Newbies Nest

Texas40:
I know what you are going through. I am in the same place you are. Quitting while hubby still drinks around me. I told him to keep it out of my face. I also drink alcoholic beers. One or two and that does the trick for me. Day 18 for me. The first weekend, which is when I have the most trouble, I spent a lot of time by myself reading posts here and eating things I really like. I brought home to go food so I was full right away. Friday night. Post often and keep your determination. Think about how great it will feel to wake up MMonday and succeed.

[treetops]

Newbies Nest

Good one Little Beagle:goodjob:
You are getting out of what seemed a locked-in pattern - with your own initiative and planning. We are here to support.

yep - weekends don't have to be licence to get wasted. Depends on who we are/where we are and what age we are etc but there are other ways to let go, escape, relax, chill - or just treat those two days as any other days. Plenty of folk have to work through the weekend anyway.

Once you break the patterns of drinking days/drinking situations - its such a release. Full of surprises, and eventually you will have so much extra time and energy - or blob time. Never easy at first - but just try...

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Good evening busy nesters

Welcome Amazing1.
Please feel free to jump in anytime on any topic. We cover just about everything sooner or later

Kuya, a very Happy Birthday to you!!!! I think I can get Stella to dance & hum a tune for you if you like :H

Wishing everyone a safe & cozy night in the nest. Get your plans in place for the weekend. Plan to succeed
Lav

[NoSugar]

Newbies Nest

treetops;1506702 wrote:
Once you break the patterns of drinking days/drinking situations - its such a release. Full of surprises, and eventually you will have so much extra time and energy - or blob time. Never easy at first - but just try...

So true, Treetops!

I love doing various creative things and had lost all my evenings for doing them the last several years. I was a BLOB watching Talking Head TV! Getting that time back to do with whatever feels right is such a gift !

Nice to see you in the Nest! :h NS

[Tess-2]

Newbies Nest

Texas40;1506629 wrote: Hi all! I have been doing so great all week and I have felt better than I have in years. But WHY WHY WHY am I already starting to think about wanting to drink this upcoming weekend? I haven't had a weekend not drinking in over six months...and that was because I was in the hospital after surgery! I can't believe my mind is trying to trick me into drinking after all of the good I have done this week. I hate this so much! Does anyone have any tips regarding how to get through their first weekend AF? My husband drinks and I am sure he will not give it up. He doesn't really drink alcoholically though...although he does drink a fair amount. I have been good all week since he has not had more than one or two beers at night, but I know he will be downing them this weekend. I am so scared I am not strong enough to be around that!!!!! Any tips would be so appreciated!!! BTW...I am only on day 5 AF. Had been cutting down for months, but decided I needed to do the 30 days.

Dear Texas40,

Your "WHY WHY WHY" conundrum is the same one that all of us in Newbies Nest must sort out and manage. You are in good company!! Yes, your mind is trying to trick you into drinking -- even after all of the good you have done this week. Alcohol is tricky, and masterful, and even savage. Believe it!!

My husband drinks too. He does not "go crazy" with alcohol like I did. He can have a couple of beers and be done with it. I can't. One beer for me is the beginning of the end. I won't stop drinking (and lying, sneaking, vomiting) until I collapse. This is the deal that Hubby and I struck up: 1) He only brings beer home that he is going to drink. Nothing is left in the fridge. 2) He does not drink beer "in my face," so to speak. He does not need to hide while he drinks, but he is aware that it is a trigger for me. 3) If I am struggling, I have the option to ask him to drink somewhere other than our home: at a sports bar, at a friend's home, or with his bro-in-law (drinking buddies).

Try to focus on the fact that you are feeling better than you have in years. After 5 alcohol free days you are feeling better than you have in years. Years!! Also, it may help to realize that "weekends" are days too. Really, they are. Yes, they can be rough. But that is because we place so much emphasis on Saturday and Sunday. Your body could not care less about Saturday or Sunday. You want to be free from the torment of alcohol every day. EVERY DAY.

You will get through this weekend. And once you've done that, you will not be "so scared" anymore. You will know that to stay sober takes commitment and self-love. You are strong.

Thanks for posting -- and stay in touch. ~

[jenniech]

Newbies Nest

Tess: I love your posts:h

[Tess-2]

Newbies Nest

Overit44;1506684 wrote: Hi everyone. Just 2 seconds to post today.

Is it Kuya's birthday? Congrats Wise One! I love everything you have to say.

It's good to see T-2 hanging around again. I really missed you.

gotta run!

Dear Overit,

It's good to hear from you, too!! Hey, we in Newbies Nest will take whatever we can get of your wisdom and humor. 2 seconds is delightful.

I have really missed you as well. I think of your flaming red hair under the bag. So cute!!

Girl, maybe you can pause and take a deep breath. Life gets insane, I know. I know.

Thanks for checking in. You are loved. ~

[Tess-2]

Newbies Nest

jenniech;1506731 wrote: Tess: I love your posts:h

Dear Jennie,

I love your posts, too. You bring so much honesty and common sense to All of us in Newbies Nest. Thank you!!

I will be a "working woman" soon. I look forward to being able to chat with you about workplace challenges. "Working lunches" come to mind. I am fortunate in that I will be able to make it clear from the start that I do not drink alcohol. Ever. But I am aware that I am a "people pleaser" too. So I will feel the pressure to fit in and be accepted.

The Nest is a fabulous place because every one of us has something to offer. Yes, we get our hind-ends kicked once in a while (ouch!) and we say things that might be better left unsaid (sorry!), but we gain so much more than we lose.

It's great to hear from you. ~

[Tess-2]

Newbies Nest

Guitarista;1506683 wrote: Byrdy.

No subject, just........:h:h:h

This is my absolute favorite!! Nothing to add. Just total agreement. Thank you, Guitarista. :rockon:

[kuya]

Newbies Nest

Thank you to everyone for birthday wishes.......I am having a good day and have plans for the weekend.

Tess your post was spot on, the weekend is just more days.

I love weekends now, but used to fear them. Now they are about rest, fun with friends and family and the sheer indulgence in the relief of getting this monkey off my back. Add to that my recent smoking quit and life couldn't look better.

I understand the fear at the beginning .....try to fill the time with physical activities and then rest......it soon passes.

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Good morning Nesters!

Glad you are having a nice birthday Kuya

Just want to wish everyone a terrific AF Friday!
Keep yourselves as busy as possible, physically & mentally & don't let those AL thoughts hang around. You'll be so proud on Monday morning

Lav