Newbies Nest

[hadit]

Newbies Nest

So True Siren, The last few weeks I have purposely put myself in places where al is present; resaurants,bottle shops etc. Crazy, I know, but I have found LIKE YOU each time I say NO it makes my resolve stronger. Its kinda like facing your fears,it gets easier, if that makes any sense!!

[Unwasted]

Newbies Nest

Good Morning Nesters,

Fly by for me today - will try to get back later for in-depth reading.

Sending everyone peace and strength - feeling fantastic today after another AF night!! And, had no temptation at dinner (eating out was a big trigger for me in the past). - YAY!!!!

xx,
UN:l

[jenniech]

Newbies Nest

Hadit..... that is great that you were able to stay no and you are steadily building you strength....but you are making me nervous.....to PURPOSELY go where the booze is and test yourself like that is dangerous!! Please be careful!!!

[Wine-no!]

Newbies Nest

Hello lovely nesters
Sorry I haven't left many comments recently. I have been reading though and just feel so far behind to jump in! I'll make more effort in future!
I am pleased to tell you I made it to day 30 today! I had real cravings last night after reading a really horrible letter that my FIL sent my husband.. I was shaking when I read it, then I felt shock and a little anger and then I felt calm again! This was very different to my old reaction to negative behaviour which would have been - shake when I read the letter with shock, drink, get angry, drink, get even more angry, drink and so on... I would have been angry still today too for this truly sad situation of a father turning on his adult son in favour of his wife (the stepmother).. Now I just feel sad about it.

Anyway, back to the good news... 30 days. Yeah! And my lovely MWO quit twinnie also reached 30 days today too of course so huge congratulations to Kambob too!

[JackDanielsGirl]

Newbies Nest

Morning everyone,

Flyaway, Tess-2, Siren, thank you for your concern. I spent 2 1/2 hrs yesterday talking with an alky mother of 2, and her husband trying to convince her to get help she knows she needs it, but not willing to commit.

So frustrating.
JDG

[bcp2013]

Newbies Nest

Hi all,well LM now 2 months and 1 day sober today,funny yesterday l said why did l quit drinking,but my husband just said you are just feeling down,every time l feel down l think of alcohol,so after a bit l was okay,this is certainly not the easiest of rides but LM sure it will be the best long term,l guess it all takes time,l use to bury my feelings in the glass of wine now l have to feel them,a bit hard but LM doing it,l slept better last night l talked on phone to my sister who quit with me ,the wine,alcohol,anyway was good always feels good talking to someone who understands the ups and downs,anyway thanks for listening ,I'm off to work soon,today it,s hot out,l work outside,have a nice day all!

[Dottie Belle]

Newbies Nest

Morning all,
Up early for me to check on the puppy. She seems fine and ready to drive the other doggies nuts...
Slept better last night. 5 days ago the thing with the puppy would have sent me into a wine binge but I am so glad I was able to handle this without my crutch. It is hard to "feel" when i have always numbed pain or disappointment or anything I didn't want to face so this is new territory for me..to just let myself feel....
Dottie

[Cocoflo]

Newbies Nest

Good Morning,

Jennie, it truly is getting through one day at a time. My plan is not to drink again, but thinking about that can be overwhelming. Just waking up each morning with the mindset that I will not drink that day seems to be working for me and the days are really adding up. Some days, I don't even think about it, I'm just getting in the habit of not drinking anymore.

Wine-no, congrats on 30 days!

All the newer nesters, keep up the good work. It gets better after you get through that first week.

Best,
cocoflo

[Tess-2]

Newbies Nest

JackDanielsGirl;1512770 wrote: Morning everyone,

Flyaway, Tess-2, Siren, thank you for your concern. I spent 2 1/2 hrs yesterday talking with an alky mother of 2, and her husband trying to convince her to get help she knows she needs it, but not willing to commit.

So frustrating.
JDG

Good Morning JGD,

You're very welcome! We All help each other.

I've been thinking this morning about Newbies who post once, maybe twice, and then disappear forever. Usually several MWO-ers respond to their post offering information and support. So I wonder what goes wrong? Then I read your post. And I think you've got it: not willing to commit. Maybe in fairness, we would say: Not able to commit. (I generally err on the side of "fairness.") Anyway, to see so many people come and then leave so quickly can leave me feeling sad.

I'm preparing for another interview today. The good news is that I'm getting interviews in this tough job market. The bad news is that interviews are quite difficult. I usually come home feeling completely drained. I will eventually work in management. I am making a permanent mental note to remember how stressful interviews are when I am the one sitting on the other side of the desk. verheated:

Thanks for all that you give, JDG. It's great to have you in the nest. ~

[lolab]

Newbies Nest

hi everyone! Unwasted - it's so nice to see you back. We missed you.

Allan, thanks for asking about me - I needed to take a break from here - and then this crazy time of year took over - I've started a garden, we have work going on on our house, my kiddo is getting "seriously" interested in girls (and OLDER ones interested in HIM!) aaaagghhh! I check in maybe once or twice a week, but then get a little overwhelmed with catching up, so I don't say anything.....

I told Byrdie that with all I have going on, I'm so thankful that I'm not drinking. But I am going to add that with all I have going on, the temptation is there...to "escape" from it....the teenager who doesn't want to talk to me a lot of the time....I've always loved being a mom but I've gotta be honest, these aren't my favorite days. I'm overwhelmed with pride for him, but also overwhelmed with worry. Driving, dating, college - it's all scaring me big time.

If I hadn't quit when I did, I think I'd be really off the deep end right now, honestly. This isn't easy folks - even at this stage. There are always going to be episodes in our lives (at least I think) where it might seem tempting to blur the sharp edges a little bit by drinking....

As I've said so many times in the past - it seems to me to be a series of ups and downs - with each "down" followed by an "up" that is just a little higher than the previous one...LOL. So I'm hanging onto my own advice - holding on tight - and waiting to see the sun when I break through these clouds that are over my head right now. I mean, having your child, who you are so proud of - grow up and turn into a young man that you are proud of - can't be all bad, right??? :H

[Siren136]

Newbies Nest

Hey Jennie and Byrdie - we have some hats to hand out over in Roll Call. I would do it but you two are the best at it!

[JackDanielsGirl]

Newbies Nest

Tess 2

You are so right! We do help each other, that is the only way to beat this disease.

Found out today that she has manipulated her husband into thinking that she can take her meds (campral) and she will be fine.

Asking all who pray to pray for her.
JDG

[Tess-2]

Newbies Nest

Lavande;1512516 wrote: Good evening Nesters,

Wow, on the topic of learning to trust ourselves.....
that was a tough one for me. It's hard work, it absolutely is but it's not impossible. Breaking free of these damn addictions requires a complete overhaul of our thinking systems

Congrats to everyone having an AF day. You will never regret this, I promise!

Wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!
Lav

Hey Lav,

I'm thinking about your post. "... a complete overhaul of our thinking."

My car began to have mechanical problems a few months back. First there was some "rear axle" something-or-other problem. That was an expensive repair. Then while on vacation (no less) the transmission went out. Hubs and I debated whether or not to put more money into repairs or to purchase another car. I tend to be the ever-practical-one (except when it comes to drinking, sadly), so I really like a car that is paid for. I did not want to start over with car payments, at all. So... we paid for a new transmission. The car runs like a gem now, as well it should!!

As you say, it's sort of the same with addiction. We must undergo a complete overhaul before we are completely healed and free. And the overhaul is "expensive" -- not so much in terms of money but in the degree of commitment. It takes our entire "savings account" of commitment to succeed at beating The Beast. But it is completely and absolutely worth it!!

It's one thing to junk a vehicle; quite another thing to junk our very lives.

[Unwasted]

Newbies Nest

Lola - wow - you're coming up on a year. SO impressive!! :l:l Really happy for you.

Thanks for the welcome back - I made it a good long time but for whatever reason my brain had to be beaten up once more. Really feeling determined but trying not to be over confident - we all know the dangers of going there!! Kind of a fine balance between having faith in yourself and not becoming complacent or smug!!

I can sure understand how you're at a stressful time with your son - seems like every kid has a certain point where they're incommunicado.......guess it's just part of their growing up.

Congrats again on your sobriety - really wonderful.

Hey Tess - just a word about your post. I know what you mean about feeling sad when people suddenly disappear. I just figure we all have our own timing and it's such an individual thing.......that it's something which has to come about organically. I think this site can help but that all the encouragement in the world can't really trigger what must happen within us to make us stay quit ........... you know, the saying that quitting is easy but staying quit is where the real work is. I read something recently that struck me. That is, many of us are addicted to the thought of quitting something -- we might get all pumped about a diet we're about to embark upon, quitting drinking, whatever. So we kind of do that over and over (get excited about beginning the quit) but falter when things get tough. Just food for thought.........I think that's what I did before. I was jazzed about the concept of quitting but when the real work was required, I didn't stick it out. Somehow knowing all that helps me -- you know, to understand the potential pitfalls. There is definitely a honeymoon period with all of this. I think AA refers to it as the pink cloud?? Not sure.........

Anyway, I'm rambling...........................

Bye everyone - have a super AF day.

xx,
UN :lilheart:

[Tess-2]

Newbies Nest

Hi Lola - It's so great to hear from you!! I appreciate all that you have to say about staying sober during trying times. I haven't raised a teenager, but I've been one. :wow3:"... the teenager who doesn't want to talk to me a lot of the time..." He will start talking again, Lola, but it gets kind of messy before it gets better. And you are giving him the best possible gift: a loving and sober mom. Very cool.

Hi UN - thanks so much for your thoughts on the process of recovery from addiction. Yes, we all have our own timing and it's an individual thing. That's true!! But I wonder why people find the website, ask for help, and then disappear without giving it a "go" -- so to speak. But, you know, they may be working very hard on their own to conquer alcoholism. Not everyone likes to write or to be "vulnerable" in cyberspace. I surely hope that I am not floating on a pink cloud!! I tend to be overly responsible (which can be both positive and negative), so my plan is to find a job that will keep me busy and "out of the closet." Also, I meet in my home with a small group of women at various stages of their "quit." This helps to keep me on track, too.

Hmm... speaking of "quit," where is Byrdie?? Maybe I missed her post today. Maybe she said that she would be out for a while and I missed that too... :duhme: