Newbies Nest

[Live_Love_Learn]

Newbies Nest

Morning all!! It's sad to read about the withdrawal struggles, I was fighting it two weeks ago so I know how you feel but stick with it, its worth it and you will be clear headed and have more control over your decisions and will enjoy even the little things like the taste of food, the smell of flowers, the sound of birds, well, maybe not the ones I hear every morning, I swear those roosters are just messing with me and one of these days.................... I'll just have to send my dog over to say!! Anywho, I digress

I'm excited to say 14 Days AF today!!

Congrats Guitarista on 22 Days!! Thats awesome!! Looks like us Aussies are kicking alcohol's butt!!!

[kuya]

Newbies Nest

Oneredshoe :l:l.....so sorry you have felt this way.....tell your husband, he needs to know. Men are not good at silent cues and he is also distracted and stressed. Just tell him, it may help him also.

Struggles....I hope you are feeling better now. I noticed a couple of things though.....you didn't take the Allinone, why? You didn't go buy booze cos you were dizzy, not because you were determined not to.

We are what we think.....it sounds like you still believe you are going to drink. WE can't stop you if that is what you BELIEVE.

You must believe that you are going to stop, or you won't, no matter what we say.

You are a human being in a human body that craves alcohol because you are addicted to it. The only fix is to stop putting it in, the FIRST step is to stop buying it. Then do everything and anything to fill the time til your brain stops screaming......it WILL stop, because you are the same as everyone else.

Take the all in one, drink plenty of fluids, read, eat, watch TV , eat some more, play with the kids, cry, cry some more, eat some more, go for a walk, sleep, wash the dog, sort your photos, play with Lego ....... JUST DON'T DRINK

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Busy Nest today -
Good evening everyone!

I know this is hard to hear when you are feeling unwell & detoxing but you need to allow yourselves time - to heal. We don't do all this damage to ourselves after a day or two of drinking. We all heal at different rates, you need to be patient. Take good care of yourselves with plenty of water, good foods, supplements, etc, the healing will come gradually

Wishing everyone a safe night in the nest, strap yourselves in for safety!
Lav

[piper123]

Newbies Nest

lf I can get through tonight I'll have day one again. My daughter came home from the beach and I said screw it. I am so done with hiding it. It just isn't worth it. The amount of energy I put into hiding my drinking is just crazy. I also am full of anxiety and probably won't sleep tonight. I just wanted to share that there is one more who is struggling tonight. I have been lurking and reading way too long without posting. I know I won't drink tonight because I didn't buy my stash today and it's alread 8 pm and there is no way I can go out and get it now. This was a huge step for me because normally, I'd plan my quit but didn't want to be without just in case.

[NoSugar]

Newbies Nest

Hang in there, Piper! Just keep reading and posting until you are sleepy. You are going to feel so much better about yourself tomorrow! You will want to feel like that every morning!

[kuya]

Newbies Nest

piper123;1514603 wrote: lf I can get through tonight I'll have day one again. My daughter came home from the beach and I said screw it. I am so done with hiding it. It just isn't worth it. The amount of energy I put into hiding my drinking is just crazy. I also am full of anxiety and probably won't sleep tonight. I just wanted to share that there is one more who is struggling tonight. I have been lurking and reading way too long without posting. I know I won't drink tonight because I didn't buy my stash today and it's alread 8 pm and there is no way I can go out and get it now. This was a huge step for me because normally, I'd plan my quit but didn't want to be without just in case.

Piper, it is said that hiding booze is symbolic of hiding our true feelings. Perhaps there is much for you to say sober.

Keeping a safety net of booze guarantees failure. The reason we succeed 'one day at a time' is because we walk that sober tightrope every day but only move it one inch higher each day. You don't need a safety net in the early days because there is not far to fall

[halo]

Newbies Nest

kambob;1514556 wrote: It does get better, and it does make you feel so damned strong even to get one extra day out of the way. Make sure to pat yourselves on the back every minute if necessary.....:goodjob:kambob

That is some excellent advice kambob, just what is needed in the early stages of your quit for sure. For all those who had some difficulty this weekend, sending you some positive vibes, remember an AF life is a better life and You are worth it!!!:l

[moretoit]

Newbies Nest

Wow just finished reading all the struggles and tears.
I am so sorry and my heart goes out to each and every one of you with a huge cyber hug. It does get better, not always easier, I think it is our determination that grows so the hard times lessen. I am not one to give advice for I have slipped many times, I just know each day I feel better and the thought to drink is always there but is not so strong.
Today is my Day 19, I know my down fall is actually going out and buying AL, then I drink till it is gone, so as long as I stay away from the LCBO I strenghten my reserves and my body.
I also know what it is like to hide the drinking, since I now live alone I am the only one to look in the eyes and try to fool, does not work.
Funny, however, I never cried when I drank too much, I would wake and give myself shit, but that does not always work at least for me. Sometimes I wonder about my concience, do I actually have one when it come to AL.
May not sound like it, but my rose colored glasses are still on. I decided on the glasses because I want to stay away from the glass being half full (full of what?) no reminders thankyou.
Today I see my brother, the pain in my lung has lessened thankfully, but my cough is there and will always be, wish I could see the respirologist sooner than July16th, but as my Mom used to say "If wishes were horses, beggers would ride!" It is so hard not to choke when a cough spasm hits and I am eating. Now that scares me more than dying from AL poisoning or from years and years of abusive drinking. Again where is my concience?
I also am having real crappy sleep patterns, I would love for that to end, after all it has been almost 2.5 weeks AF.
I did wake this morning thinking about a nice glass of wine, but lets be honest there is nothing nice about a glass of wine. I sometimes want to ask when this stops, but that now goes against my new found way of thinking. All positive, all the time. Rose coloured glasses.
A year ago I OD'd, I did not wish to die, so I called 911. Turns out anti-depressants can go against you, that and I downed the new bottle (different script) with wine, I got worse on these new meds. I went off them and yes my depression got better, but very slowly. The AL did not help.
Anyway, two parts to this story. One my son understood about the meds, thankfully, it is possible his wife has some medical training. He was telling a close friend about me on a friday night over afew ones, then the following Monday the boys Mom took her life, tragic. My daughter on the other thinks I am not taking responsiblity for my actions, I think she has since done some research for she is not so hard on me. I guess the moral of my story is depression and AL do not mix.
So on that note, I will say have a wonderful AF Monday.

Enjoying life AF for we all know there is "More to it"

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Good morning Nesters,

Dark & raining in my neighborhood today. Just hopes it breaks up the heatwave of the past 5 days!

moretoit, congrats to you on your AF time!
True that life does not become perfect when we quit but it does get easier to manage just about everything. When I quit I vowed to never step foot in a liquor store again & am proud to say I haven't. I will never spend another cent on wine or any AL.
I hope your respiratory troubles ease up for you very soon. Has your GP offered any help?

Wishing everyone a wonderful AF Monday!
Lav

[jenniech]

Newbies Nest

Miley :goodjob: on fighting that craving!!! Move a muscle, change a thought.....funny how sometimes the simple things - like cleaning a deck - can beat a craving.
For me, that does not always help. Sometimes no matter what I do, I still crave a drink. So what do I do? I surf the wave of the crave Think of a wave in the ocean. It starts out so small, you barely see it...then it build in strength but if you ride it out, it eventually crashes....it always passes.... it is not fun riding the wave, but the alternative is FAR WORSE. Think it through is what I always do.....

Byrdlady always said it, but not until I actually did it was I able to remain AF....What did she say? GET RID OF ALL AL IN YOUR HOUSE. If your significant other drinks, ask them to please HIDE their beverage so you don't know where it is. We have been so busy hiding OUR booze, it is time for them to take a turn.

If you are resisting an urge, don't even think about driving past a liquor store. Your AL brain may take over and that would be TERRIBLE.

Everyone is sounding good and strong and using tools to remain AF. Just keep posting and reading and reminding yourself of how you feel hungover. What helps me too is that I think about how many times people would have to tell me what happened the night before. That is an AWFUL feeling....especially when my kids gave me those funny looks.

Now I am rambling and I need to get my butt in gear and get to work!!
Happy Monday everyone!!

[bcp2013]

Newbies Nest

Good morning,well I'm now 64 days sober,Lt feels good. I read post that showed the video from u tube,l bet if everyone watched that guy who had yellow eyes from alcohol,come home from the hospital and guzzle the wine,soo sad.please watch if you have any reservations on drinking,anyway stay sober ,the weekend was good ,Fridays are always a bit hard ,only for a few hrs,than weekend was great!!! Please remember why you want to quit ,you don't want to end up down that path.happy Monday!!

[Siren136]

Newbies Nest

bcp2013;1514804 wrote: Good morning,well I'm now 64 days sober,Lt feels good. I read post that showed the video from u tube,l bet if everyone watched that guy who had yellow eyes from alcohol,come home from the hospital and guzzle the wine,soo sad.please watch if you have any reservations on drinking,anyway stay sober ,the weekend was good ,Fridays are always a bit hard ,only for a few hrs,than weekend was great!!! Please remember why you want to quit ,you don't want to end up down that path.happy Monday!!

Yes that was so sad and one of the things that really drove it home for me. On the bright side, the last I checked he's was still sober and doing well. On the sad side, he was the only one still alive, Vanda had died for the disease.

[lolab]

Newbies Nest

good morning.

It's gloomy here, too Lav. Hard to believe we had 90 plus degrees a couple days ago and now it's barely 50. I guess I should be able to get some cleaning done.

I did some reading this morning and want to say congrats to kuya and Allan. Fantastic job! You both just made up your minds and just did it. When you don't give yourself an allowance for failure, you're destined to succeed! (kuya, wish I had some advice for the smokes - but the only thing that worked for me was getting pregnant and spending 9 months sick as a dog...I'm guessing that's not an option...:H)

And I've gotta say hello to Piper... a friend from way back. :-) You saw how it worked yesterday...those first couple days that's what it boils down to - just not having alcohol available as an option at all. Then be prepared for the mental chatter to start - that you're fine - just go buy some - just to have a little here and there - but we know so well, that it just doesn't work that way. No matter how many times I tried it - I always ended up drinking the same amount...and when the bottle was gone, I'd spend a day or so feeling better, then decide that if I bought another one, I'd just have a little bit at night - I wouldn't go overboard with this one...so off I'd go, buy more, and drink the same amount. On and on and on.... It's insane. Looking back, I just can't imagine how I lived like that for years. What a waste. You can do it.

lola

[struggles]

Newbies Nest

I made it through, however, the cravings hit at an odd time....almost 10pm, that's when I'm usually passed out. I felt alot better in the later part of the day, around 4-6, but then began feeling kinda crappy again. The dizzyness has come down alot, but still there a little bit...almost like a light headed feeling and get that rush of whoo, almost again, like off balance. The shakes went away, but had a little this morning, but not bad. Today is going to be tough since I don't work and will not have my kids. I will see them after school when they pick up their stuff to go to their dads, but that's it. That has always been my excuse to drink all day and stop early so I can make it to work on Tuesday. I ordered pizza, wings, fried cauliflower and eggplant parmesan for dinner last night for us and it was expensive, but I ate the eggplant and a half slice of pizza. I have so many leftovers, but I kept remining myself that it's less than what I would spend on beer in two days. I watched my mini video again and just cried. How could I let my life get like this, when did it "really" start? Was I in denial for years? Reading all the posts and seeing so many of us trying to "hide" it...I was never a liar, brought up in a church, I was the "good" girl who could go and have a bloody mary with extra celery and only a half shot and be happy or only two beers, what happened to "her"...I want her back, but with no alcohol at all.

I feel like I did when I found out my husband was cheating on me and I kept going back and begging for it to be like it was before, when we loved each other and things were happy. I did it for years until one day, I called a lawyer and filed for divorce. Yes, many tears ensued, but I felt free from a liar and a cheat...of course I was hurt and began drinking more and then the landslide hit. I used to work out at our YMCA while the kids swam or did kid stuff and that came to a screeching halt. I remember crying on my way to work because I screwed up my life and lost my husband and crying when I got home and crying before sleep and drinking...what a mess that was.

So please, again, I am asking for your help. Keep me in your thoughts and prayers. Happy AF Monday. :thanks:

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Good morning, M Dub-ya O'ers!
I hope everyone had a safe and sober weekend.

I was thinking a good bit about the struggling that we go thru in the first few days. There are some real basics to be shared. Kuya and Jenni nailed it, and I'd like to underscore it. If you want to shake AL out of your life, you have to do some things differently than you've ever done before. If you haven't found success in the past, don't repeat those mistakes. That's easy to say...hard to do. One of the points I resisted with vigor was getting all the AL out of my space. This could possibly be THE most important factor in early success. I understand that you think you can do it...because that's what I thought. If it is around, I'm going to find a way to justify drinking it. My dog puked, my kid got in trouble, it rained on my good pillow, I got a paper cut...it doesn't take much. I understand this. We are AL addicts, and as much as I hate to say that and hear it, it's true. As such, we must get the substance that we abuse out of our reach. Make sense? Of course, it does. Until you get it out, you are not committed to getting and being sober, IMHO. This is something that you have to commit to....like Lav said, she promised herself never to go into a liquor store or buy it. When you stop bullshitting yourself, you can make forward progress. We aren't making these things up, there are 7+ years of history to look at on this site. The things that are tried and true are here for the asking. I'm afraid there aren't any shorter cuts than that which we offer. It only takes a couple days of AF time to get over the hardest part. You can do that. Set yourself up for success, not failure. Get thru this day AF no matter what and no matter who. Try to see things from a different perspective...not that you are being deprived, but that you are setting forth a new way to LIVE! It's all a matter of perspective....for a worm, a day of digging around in the hard old dirt is a lot more relaxing than going fishing....
Have a happy, sober Monday! Byrdie