Newbies Nest

[Pinecone]

Newbies Nest

Good morning friends,

BCP, good to see you. Kudos to you on wanting to move forward in your life. Sometimes I think that truly adopting the AF life is like getting hit by lightning and surviving. It makes you want to really live the life you always.

Hi Snapdragon, I can sympathize about dealing with insurance companies. It is trying for sure.

Girly, hope you are doing well. I don't know where you are geographically, but if it is morning, maybe you have enough resolve to dump any alcohol that's left? Go get some food and lock yourself in for the day? Wishing you strength.

See you all later, have a great AF day everyone.

[some-dumbass]

Newbies Nest

JDG - just noticed your 30 days on the roll call. fantastic, well done you! :goodjob:

[Scarlett1946]

Newbies Nest

Mandiekinz, your fried chicken sentence really hit home! I cook all the time and there are so many times that I can't remember eating, did I feed everyone? Was it good? I check the fridge for leftovers to see if I really completed dinner! Occasionally I check to see if I posted dinner on Facebook! (I post cool dinners for foodie friends, yes I'm lame). Sigh.....

Well, last night, I remember everything.... Yes I drank, but less again. Still too much and I am contemplating tossing the rest of the brandy. I really do not want to drink anything tonight! That is my goal!

Off to look at diseased liver photos! That may work! (By the way... Could lower back pain be liver pain? I always have a lower back ache, wonder if its not my back but my liver..... Left side. Another thing to look up).
Happy Thursday!

[NoSugar]

Newbies Nest

Scarlett1946;1536436 wrote: ....
Well, last night, I remember everything.... Yes I drank, but less again. Still too much and I am contemplating tossing the rest of the brandy. I really do not want to drink anything tonight! That is my goal!

Hi, Scarlett

Your rational brain is working right now, defining your goal. Later today, a different part of your brain, the one that drives you to drink every day, will be in charge. When there is a conflict between parts of our brains, the more basic part that drives us to eat, have sex, and seek pleasure from any source, wins. Its a dumb system when alcohol is so available but a good one when the goal is for people to get old enough to reproduce and keep the species going.

So, now, while your well-developed, what-makes-us-human, rational brain is in charge, you have to set the stage to thwart the pleasure-seeker that is going to be coming home from work later today.

Dump the booze NOW. Have AF alternatives in place. It is essential to have a set-in-stone plan in that does not require executive function because that part of you is going to be overpowered. That is why all the good intentions and promises of morning after morning almost always disappear. Please set yourself up for success, Scarlett.

:h NS

[Mandiekinz]

Newbies Nest

Buon Giorno a tuttiiiii......

I gotta tell you, for my second day waking up to you folks is bliss...reading back from where I left off...it's as though some of you speak for me. It's so nice to feel understood without saying a word. AA certainly never did this for me, although rehab always did but I can't stay in there forever although sometimes, I wish I could.

Scarlett! My chicken was AWFUL! It tasted nothing like I remember from the two times I made it wasted last week. The fiance agrees. Not only did I bread it wrong but the kids came out and asked if it was supposed to be bloody AFTER they ate it! They ate it all just to please me. Poor things, I'm hoping they aren't sick. They say that even though you THINK you do things better intoxicated, you don't. Well in this case, they're wrong. The toughest part was to not beat myself up over it. Wow, that's an angel and demon feeling. I hope that you do dump the brandy, I personally wouldn't have the strength to do such a thing...but if you find that strength to do it...then you are making HUGE progress and have more strength in yourself than I bet you never thought you had! Also, about your pain, I would also check into kidneys. With drinking I'd always get kidney infections that hurt badly there followed by fevers and whole body aches.

BCP - your words are uplifting and inspiring! Finally finding control of your life and your thoughts does miraculous things! I'm looking forward to that day. Thank you!

Have a fantastic day full of smiles!

[3June2013]

Newbies Nest

Good morning nesters I'm in and out for a quick hello before work. Did a one hour yoga class and I will ride my bike to work today. It's 10k each way so it gets my heart pumping.

Newbies arm yourselves. Never forget this is war. AL is the enemy. A good plan will get you through but you must have a plan and you must stick with it.

At ease.

[Tess-2]

Newbies Nest

Without willing it I had gone from being ignorant of being ignorant to being aware of being aware. And the worst part of my awareness was that I didn't know what I was aware of, but I was certain that the things I had yet to be aware of wouldn't be taught to me at George Washington High School. -- Maya Angelou

This morning I read Angelou's quote and then sat thinking about it. I like to think about things; always have. Hubs jokes that I should look for a job as a contemplative. Well, I haven't found any positions like that in my job search, and if I did I'm certain the pay would be rather poor as our society values doing over being.

It seems to me that the process of recovery from alcoholism is going from "being ignorant of being ignorant to being aware of being aware." For me, when I first started drinking a beer or two to help ease my anxiety, I was completely ignorant of the fact that I had just purchased a one-way ticket to hell. After 18 months of chugging beer my weight had nearly doubled. DOUBLED. But by then I was shackled into the darkness and could not get out. When I stumbled across the MWO website after five years of being a drunk, I became aware that I was becoming aware of the truth about alcoholism. But I didn't yet know what the truth was.

This is my understanding of the truth: We CAN unshackle ourselves and walk straight out of hell. But here's the deal: We must WANT to get out of hell. Really want it!! There is no train out of hell, no easy ride where we can sit back and relax. If we are waiting for the train (the easy way out) we will wait forever. There is NO train. We must make a decision and then begin to hike out on our own two wobbly legs. And it's a steep incline, especially in the beginning. Without continued effort we will roll right back down into the darkness of compulsive drinking.

If someone tells you that there is an EASY way to stop drinking and stay sober, you've just been lied to. If someone tells you that there is NO way to stop drinking and stay sober, you've just been lied to.

The hike out of hell is made easier if a few like-minded people group together. That's where The Nest comes in. We support each other. We share information and wisdom and hope. We offer our friendship, which includes an occasional swift kick in the pants. We have shoulders to cry on and people to laugh with. Still, each of us must make a daily decision to keep walking in a forward direction. It is our choice; our decision. No one can choose for us and no one can walk for us.

And... it is the journey of a lifetime. Each day it gets a bit easier and we get a tad stronger. Yes, we have setbacks. Life is still life out in the great big world: the good, the bad, and the ugly. But we now have the freedom to do things other than drink. That freedom, that precious freedom, is worth hiking and fighting for!!

Thanks to All of you for accompanying me on this journey to freedom. ~

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Good afternoon, Nesters! Late check in for me. I feel incomplete until I come here and account for myself. This is part of my Plan. I cannot tell you when I didn't check in at least once a day. It's a plan that is working for me so I'm not going anywhere! If my plan is to stay sober, then this site is part of that!! The world is telling us exactly the opposite of what we must do....our Addiction Head (Dick Head) starts talking louder and louder during the course of the day. When we sit down in the evening when we're most vulnerable, the TV ads start hitting us, the shows and all the sitcoms include people everywhere doing what we simply cannot do. We begin to feel isolated and we cave. That's why staying in touch here is so vital....WE KNOW that for us, AL is a one way ticket to hell. Being around and participating in a forum of people going against the tide is a key to succeeding. It will NOT always be so hard to do! Remember, I was a very resistant case, and even I finally got it!!! Being AF now is not difficult, but it is essential. Do I still feel out of place sometimes in social situations? Yes, but I quickly get over it. I would NOT quickly 'get over' yielding to it. The little bit of discomfort I feel occasionally is NOTHING compared to the daily alcohell I was in. The discomfort passes...quickly. I also don't eat seafood of any kind...you should see the grilling I take over that. I think I'm now seen as simply "quirky". Better than being 'the drunk'.

SomeD... thanks for posting the link to the Rain In My Heart documentaries. You may look at them and say, 'well that's not me!! They are way worse than I ever was!' That may be true today. That wasn't me, either 10 years ago, but painfully close just 3 years ago. Remember ALK is progressive...it doesn't just 'get better' and it really doesn't just stay put either...it gets worse. If you don't see yourself in those documentaries today, you're prolly in the team photo....this is where our disease leads. It is a winner take all situation. Whether AL wins or you win is the question! There is a cure to our disease, and it's as simple as not drinking!! Simple yes, easy, no. But it is certainly doable as you see pages of folks here doing it. We all started with Day 1.

Tess, I wish you'd put that post you just wrote in the Tool Box...it is a keeper.

Welcome newest newbies and to some familiar faces, too! Settle in and get comfy!

Busy day with my real job!! Hope everyone has a wonderful, and easy day!! Byrdie

[Tess-2]

Newbies Nest

I've watered all of the plants in my yard before the heat of the day hits. I now have a cup of coffee and am ready to get this day started.

broken halo - I was thinking of you earlier this morning, and am so happy WITH you that you woke up sober after birthday celebrations yesterday. Awesome!! I don't suppose you cooked a big breakfast?? :egg:

Snap - I feel bad that you are having such a rough time. Really sorry!! Once you stop drinking, it will only take a few days to start enjoying the alcohol-free life again. You can do this. You know the way!!

piper - Huge congrats on 20 alcohol-free Days. Way to go!!

some-dumbass - Hey, you're onto Day 4. Nice!! For me, Day 3 was a rough one. Just think, you never again need to have a Day 3. Very cool!!

Mein - Good to hear from you!! Yes, we all need to post if we are thinking about taking a drink. Love and strength to you, too!!

bcp - You sound great!! It's takes courage to take big steps like changing jobs. I admire you!! Freeing ourselves from alcohol opens up an entire world of possibilities. Way to go!!

JDG - You are chipper this morning!! Thank you for your cheerful post. You have come through some very tough times -- and you've shown us how to keep moving forward in spite of difficulty. You are an awesome Nestmate!!

Pauly - Thanks for checking-in!! I always love your bright avatar. Becoming alcohol-free opens our eyes to many things in our life that could use a bit of adjustment. When we're drinking we are mostly numb and zoned-out to life. Once were sober for a while we become ready and able to be true to who we really are. Nice to see you!!

Pine - Good morning to you!! Thanks for your wisdom and care, as always. I hope you have a most excellent day!!

No Sugar - Wow!! Your post blew my socks off!! Such wisdom!! Maybe you could move it to the Toolbox?? It's far too helpful to let slip into "yesterday's news." I wouldn't mind reading it every morning for a while. It makes perfect sense. Thank you!!

3June - Happy that you were able to pop in for a quick hello!! Wise words on the need for a plan. It's easy to get lost on the journey and wander in circles. Gotta have a plan!! Have a beautiful day!!

Lav - Greetings!! A break in the weather. Yeah!! You need that!!

Byrdie - Howdy!! I was just asking about you. I see that you've flown in. Whew!!

Scarlett and Mandiekinz - Happy to see that you are settling into The Nest. Don't hesitate to give a shout if you need some help. There are lots of Fledglings and Wise Birds to offer support. Thanks to both of you for sharing your stories with us. You are appreciated!!

:disco: Okay ALL Nesters, time to rock on!!

[JackDanielsGirl]

Newbies Nest

JDG - You are chipper this morning!! Thank you for your cheerful post. You have come through some very tough times -- and you've shown us how to keep moving forward in spite of difficulty. You are an awesome Nestmate!!

Tess 2 Thank you for your encouraging words, I need them this am. I have been brought to light that both of my children have been selling narcs.:upset:

I am absolutely devastated, scared, and really pissed off:damn:

talk more later
Love JDG

[JackDanielsGirl]

Newbies Nest

ok I am back,
my son 15 stole an entire prescription of 60 oxy and 90 percs, took some and sold most. My 21yo daughter got 60 tabs from a "friend" and sold most of those.

Son finally fessed up, daughter still denies it, to top it off during the family meeting my hubs decides to as us "Just how far are yall going to push me before I disappear?" WTC?!?!?! both kids said do what you feel like you need to do, then he added well I am the only one not screwing up. Really?!?!?!?! Did not know there was more than one perfect person that ever walked the earth.

Needless to say after 30 min of cross words he realized his error and apologized. I got the blame as usual if you had not become an alky none of this would have ever happened. blah, blah, blah.

Heard it all before and my tear, shame, regret factory is CLOSED. I can not change my past only press forward through today and look to the future AF. As BAD as I wanted a drink yest, I resisted.
One of the hardest times to resist yet.

Whew sorry for ranting but had to get that out.
Thanks for reading
JDG

PS both grounded indefinitely!

[Neddy Merrill]

Newbies Nest

Wow! So much activity on this nesters thread since this morning when I last posted!

So much encouragement too - this is a war and I hope, troops, that you are up for the battle and not the bottle.

For those of you who are doing well, fantastic! Really pleased for you and I hope that your sun never sets and you never end up back where you were. Just remember you don't have to. If you feel the need or the craving or the inkling for "just one", get on here, get to a meeting, phone a non AL friend.

For those who are struggling the advice is the same but remember that you are in your fellow nesters' thoughts. Sit tight and remember that this too shall pass.

I just want to say that I love this site and this thread in particular. You are all amazing and inspire me on a daily basis.

I have had an absolutely fantastic day today (won't bore with details) yet there was no AL involved, no desire for it either and it is all down to my friends here in the nest.

Big thanks, big hugs, big kisses to you all. You are the best!

Neddy

[NoSugar]

Newbies Nest

JDG,

I am so sorry you are facing such a major family crisis but am so glad for you that you've been sober for a month, putting you in a good position to handle this as well as you can.

You have truly earned these 30 days and did it with dignity and grace even when circumstances and the people around you made it tough. Please be extra strong tonight.

:l NS

[broken halo]

Newbies Nest

Hello Nesters!

JDG, great news on your 30 days, well done! I am so sorry about all the family stuff that's going on, but it's not your fault. Keep setting a sober example to your kids, and don't let your husband's comments get to you. You are doing great, don't let anyone take that away from you, and you are far more well equipped to deal with problems sober.

I just got back from work and have read so many inspiring posts already. Byrdie, I agree about posting here every day keeping me accountable. Tess, I didn't manage a big breakfast, I ate so much last night! :H

Mandie, Scarlett, keep posting girls. Scarlett, you know that you don't need that brandy Look at it, think about how horrible it really tastesChuck it down the sink and free yourself. As long as it is there, AL has a bargaining tool to use on you.

Tess, that post of yours was inspirational, but then your posts usually are.

Piper, you and I have the same AL free time, doesn't it feel great? Well done! I find it hard to believe that it was three weeks ago today that I had my last drink. You guys in the nest have been incredible. Thank you all for your posts and your continuing support, it is more appreciated than you know. :l

[witts end]

Newbies Nest

jdg hang in there you did a good job not going for the drink .......hubby will soon realise he can't blame you for being drunk ......could be why you drank in the first place ....was for me

good work on the 30days ...god for you

glad you had a good day neddy